by Katie Dowe
“Mom, don’t scare him. I already did that a few days ago,” Vaneese interjected. “You know he paid for the trip.”
“Yes. What a wonderful, nice young man.” Her eyes welled up with tears. “I want photos. Photos of my baby girl holding her son. Of you two together,” she indicated Cameron and Aleshia, “and of all of us in the frame.” Gail, among other things, stored thousands of photographs in boxes in her Minnesota home. It was something of an obsession of hers, to document as much of her and her family’s lives in pictures, seeing the changes, the places and the moments they shared. “When my memory gets old and frail, I want to have them in front.”
“Yes, mom,” Vaneese said, with a hint of exasperation. “We’ll do that.” She walked over to her sister, and held hands with Aleshia for a short while. Gail did the same, creating a memory of the mother and daughters together. Aleshia didn’t bother with much conversation, the cocktail of painkillers already befuddling her mind. She did know, however, seeing everyone there filled her with indescribable happiness. The warmth of her family’s hands grasped in her fingers, with Cameron and Dijon hovering anxiously nearby felt like an impossible dream come true. The only thing missing from the scene was her son.
She drifted in and out of sleep, vaguely aware that the exhaustion might be an issue for the first few months of her new life.
Back at home, she cradled her son in her arms, staring into the toffee pigmented baby’s astonishing blue eyes. He didn’t fuss much at this moment, though the heavy world of motherhood was already crashing around Aleshia. She needed to put her freelancing projects on hold – she barely held the energy to focus on writing and marketing when she couldn’t sleep for more than two hours at a time.
She recalled her mother’s subsequent burst of tears when Aleshia announced the name of the child – Ezra Washington. The name of her late father, who did everything in his power to provide for his family the best life possible – even at the eventual cost of his health and an early death. It was one of the sadder testaments to their existence that his life insurance contributed more than most of the time he had worked – but again, it also showed the remarkable, draconian efforts he invested into his family.
Preserving his legacy in a name was the least Aleshia could do.
Ezra blinked sleepily. His mouth parted in a yawn, and a squeak skittered out of his throat. He started twitching small, stubby fingers – Aleshia identified the gesture, and brought her son close to nurse. The worries and fears tumbled out in place of the immediate attention of the new-born. Exhaustion hovered at the edges of her consciousness, and she chose a careful position to rest in, so that if she fell asleep, Ezra would not be in danger of falling off or being squashed. She managed to nod off, for an hour, and woke up to the sound of someone knocking on her door. With a grunt of exertion, she got up, cradling her now dozing son, pulled her specially padded bra, designed for breast-feeding mothers, courtesy of Vaneese – and slowly went for the door. She checked for signs of dizziness, making sure she had things to hold onto, and made the journey without trouble.
Opening the door greeted her with Cameron Lovell, who smiled sheepishly from the entrance. Rain trickled down from light gray clouds, leaving spots of damp on his floral-patterned shirt. “Hey. Do you have any visitors now? Do you mind if I come in?”
“Come in. Come in. I’m expecting mother and Vaneese around later. I think mother’s been shopping around Miami, trying to pick out new baby clothes for Ezra. I also believe Vaneese has been assisting.”
“That sounds like quite the undertaking,” Cameron said with a grin, stepping inside. When he saw Aleshia sway slightly, he instantly stabilized her by the shoulders.
“Thanks. I’m gonna go and make you a coffee, if you want…”
“No, please. Sit down. I’ll make it myself. One for you, too?”
“Please.” Aleshia didn’t protest the gesture. She sat back down on the sofa, where an impression of her previous sleeping position had crinkled into the leather surface. She watched Cameron patter around, neatening things and sorting out the drinks in lazy joy. She loved the sight, and hoped they would share many more days like this. Seeing him here made her feel complete.
Why had she ever tried to push him away? Why did she allow the doubts to consume her?
“Aren’t you supposed to be working, today?” Aleshia continued scrutinizing Cameron, once again noting the delicious contours of his body, the way muscles flexed and moved under his shirt. His hair appeared damp, along with a stain on the top of his shirt, and the flecks of damp. She glanced outside the balcony, reflecting the light drizzle of rain in the warm, tropical day, which had the peculiar effect of pulling down her mood. She wondered if she would feel this tired if the sun blazed like a beacon, instead of hiding behind gloom clouds.
“I’ve taken two weeks off. I’ve not booked any holidays, yet, so I have a few to use up,” he said.
Aleshia took the opportunity to take her son to his cot upstairs, away from the boiling kettle, and tucked him tenderly into his covers. She took the baby monitor from the side, to help check on him even when she wasn’t in the same room, kissed his forehead, and re-entered the living room.
“That makes you sound like a workaholic,” she observed, placing the active baby monitor on the coffee table. Quiet breathing could be heard if she placed her ears close enough to it.
“Not really. How’s everything been so far? How’s your family been dealing with you since you got back?”
“They’re all over me,” Aleshia said sourly. “Vaneese insists on cooking for me each day, wanting the best for mother and son. My mother has brought me about a million different supplements which she expects me to chug down three times a day. And due to the frivolous nature of my freelancing position, Vaneese practically wants me to live at her house for the next year. My mother’s even offered to arrange things to stay here for a few months so she can help me with her considerable experience of how to survive motherhood. I love my mother, but I’m not sure that’s a great idea.”
“It’s brilliant,” Cameron said, his rugged, movie-star features becoming animated. “I love that your family is willing to go to the moon to make sure everything works out. It’s a blessing.”
Aleshia blushed. “It is. I sometimes feel like they’re just nosing around, making my life a lot busier and complex than what it would be, without them. But, if I fall, they’ll be there. Always.”
Bringing two complete mugs of coffee, Cameron rested them on two Wayward Boot coasters – given as a kindly gesture from the owners of the establishment. He sank next to Aleshia, and she cuddled up to him, breathing in his salt-air scent, triggering all the pleasure synapses in her brain. Oh, how she had missed his presence, his scent, his feel! She mentally kicked herself for denying this slice of happiness.
She had a lot to make up for.
“I wish the child was yours,” Aleshia said, suddenly. “Biologically yours.”
Cameron twitched one eyebrow in an unspoken question.
“I feel like things would be easier, then. It worries me that I’ll look at little Ezra, and I’ll keep wishing that he was yours. Because I feel like this is where I’m meant to be. Where I should have always been.”
Blowing on the steaming mug of coffee, Cameron took his time to answer. “Ezra may not biologically be mine, but that doesn’t mean I can’t be a father to him. You shouldn’t need to worry about how he came here. You should only worry about whether we’ll be good enough parents to deal with him.”
“But why?” Aleshia gave him imploring eyes. “How can you be so fine with this? I still can’t wrap my head around it. We just collided into each other and didn’t want to break apart. I almost fucked that up, but we’re here, and you’re fine with this. Why?”
The realtor suspected the question was more rhetorical, but he gave voice to it anyway. At this point, Aleshia’s head rested on his lap, and he twirled her hair around his finger, smiling in a dream-like way, as if he couldn’
t believe what was happening, either.
“I can’t possibly describe it as anything else but like a key fitting into a lock. Like everything that didn’t make sense before is better for everything, now. I, uh, broke the news to my parents as well.”
“Oh? Did you? How did that go?” Aleshia reached up to stroke underneath his chin, not bothering to move out of her comfortable position to get her beverage. She imagined the experience as being awkward for Cameron, wondered if a look of horror might have scrawled itself across his mother’s face, or whether his father had shook his head, lamenting his son’s choice.
“They took it… better than expected,” Cameron admitted. “I had to talk things over with them for some hours. I think my mother’s just relieved I’m gone from a lothario to someone who will try out the happy family card. My dad is struggling to understand why I would commit to you and a child in such a short amount of time. He wooed my mother the traditional way – proposing to her after two years of dating. Neither of them are treating me like a pariah, so that’s something.”
“That’s good. That’s really good. I hope they’ll like me when they see me.” Aleshia felt genuine happiness and relief for his parent’s reaction.
“Oh, they will. They will.” He kissed Aleshia’s nose, kneading his palm gently into her back. “I’m not looking forward to learning to change diapers, though.”
“Ugh.” Aleshia laughed, dragged his head closer, and engaged him in a deep, mouth to mouth kiss. The weariness that had settled within her limbs decided to vanish at that moment, replaced instead with a bolt of arousal. It surprised Aleshia – she hadn’t expected to be in the mood for a while after birth. But now, with her son sleeping, with Cameron here, looking gorgeous, and, frankly, edible – she allowed herself a moment of engaging their desires.
Cameron withdrew back in amusement. “I get the feeling someone missed doing that.”
“Oh, I did,” Aleshia purred. “I did.”
This time, the sex came awkwardly, softly, as both parties adjusted to the new situation. Cameron needed to relearn sensitive spots. The post-pregnant Aleshia found herself oversensitive, over-alert to almost everything Cameron did. Her skin followed his touch, hairs rising on her arm as he put light pressure with his fingers, holding his breath as he did so. Aleshia shivered, and stretched out like a cat.
“Will this be alright?” He whispered, making certain Aleshia wanted it. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
His fingers glided across her shirt, over her bra-clad breasts. Even through two layers of material, she winced at the motion. Cameron lightened his touch, brushing over her surfaces like a feather, always slow, always careful.
Aleshia explored him with her hands in return, reacquainting herself with the body that had been hers over four months ago, and had now delivered itself back into her embrace.
They turned on the sofa to face one another, and as the rain pattered outside, increasing in velocity, they peeled off the few items of clothing that remained. Cameron kept her bra on, understanding their tenderness, the issue that came from storing the milk needed to keep Ezra strong.
Instead, he allowed Aleshia to delight and discover several more erogenous zones she hadn’t been aware of, such as her feet, and just under her wrists, and the bottom rib of her sides. The pathways Cameron left with his fingers and lips blazed in her mind and left a trail of goose-bumps where he touched. Her mind soared with the contact, her body shuddered in delight, feeling complete at last. She wanted Cameron to caress her forever, never stop the gentle love he showed her skin, brought to her soul.
She kissed him long and hard on the lips, electricity sparking along their bodies. She heard him grunt in surprise and lust as she raked his back hard, then soothed over the motion with fluttering touches. Her thighs pressed into his, their bodies tangled together in a heated ball of passion. Hands went into hair, traced details in skins, and the leather creaked around them as they kept moving and adjusting positions.
The desire fanned up in Aleshia like a storm, and she detected the same energy in Cameron, in the desperate urgency that they kissed one another, tongues doing the tango, bodies bucking and arching in a short, mutual wrestling match. Aleshia still felt sore inside, though her uterus had contracted without much issues. Cameron, sharply aware and attentive to her needs, again whispered in her ear that he would be glad to pleasure her down there orally, or that they could stop if she wished.
In mischievous response, and because she had waited so long for him to touch her again, to love her again – she kissed her way down to his throbbing arousal, and gently licked it, before taking him in her mouth. His heartbeat soared in pace with hers, and she treasured the length of him, licking, kissing, and thrusting her head in the tantalizing motion he would have made, if he had entered her. She stopped just before he came, and with a gasp, his semen spilled over her thighs.
Panting, they lay together on the sofa, warm and secure. Both of them glowed with happiness and pleasure, a cocktail of pleasurable hormones making them feel lighter than air.
“I sure missed you,” Aleshia breathed, kissing Cameron once more.
“I missed you too. For all of my life, I’ve been missing you.”
The romantic words sent a thrill of delight. “Maybe I can say the same for you. And perhaps I can say the same for Ezra. I love that little shit, though I think he’s going to give me eyebags.”
“You have your family to help. You have me.” Cameron said this with complete sincerity, voice and eyes unwavering. They stared for a long while, peaceful.
They then nuzzled noses. Aleshia grinned like an idiot. “Please feel free to slap me if I start getting insecure. Well. Not actually slap. But you know what I mean.”
“Would it make you feel more secure if I said I want to marry you? Because I did offer that, just before you decided to rupture yourself.”
Aleshia gaped, then, eyes brimming with tears, hugged Cameron tightly. “I would love it! Would you? Do you mean it?”
Cameron Lovell, holding her close, whispered, “Of course. I mean, I don’t have a ring handy on me right now, but you’ll be seeing one tomorrow. I love you, Aleshia. I want you to be in my life. And I want to do the best I can with little Ezra.”
“He likes you,” Aleshia said, unable to believe what was happening. Despite everything they had gone through, and the lines they had broken, this felt right. His proposal felt natural. She couldn’t imagine taking on her future without this rare gem of a man. Poem dust-motes stirred themselves into life.
She kept thinking as they dressed, hearing gurgling noises crackle from the baby monitor, and went to check in on Ezra. Less than a week old, Ezra blinked sleepy eyes at them as they approached, making squeaking noises. Smiling, Aleshia watched as Cameron lifted Ezra as though he would break apart at any moment, relaxing when Ezra caught his eyes and made more gurgling sounds.
Baby blue/Named for love
“He doesn’t seem distressed, does he?” Cameron murmured, examining the baby. He tapped one long finger on Ezra’s nose. When he rested it against the baby’s hand, Ezra instinctively flexed, trapping Cameron with stubby tightness. “Wow. Nice grip.”
“You should be careful he doesn’t take it off,” Aleshia said, laughing. She resisted the urge to make cooing sounds, watching fondly as Cameron bonded with the baby.
The three of us/Sent from above
Yes. This could work out. Aleshia had no idea what troubles the future would bring. How Cameron’s parents would accept her. How they would work together, living in the same household.
We were lost/But we were found
Our souls/They share a special sound
Right now, seeing Cameron cradle Ezra, who gurgled calmly, fascinated by Cameron’s face – she believed things could work out.
She believed they could be a family.
Epilogue
Six and a half months later
Above, the sun glared through the clouds. The water sparkled beneath, t
ucked between Miami Beach and the main shore. Aleshia Lovell tapped away on her laptop, angled in a way so she could watch Ezra out of the corner of her eyes, and enjoy the heat of the summer.
The balcony itself was secure enough to prevent a small, hyperactive baby from accidentally turning into a tomato stain, as the barrier reached over a meter high, but Aleshia worked inside with the doors locked shut. Ezra, donning a blue and white shirt and a bulging, freshly changed nappy, was making babbling noises and crawling slowly towards a large, fluffy bear. Ezra had figured out his new form of locomotion four days prior, and focused on taking full advantage of it. He found if he placed his palms flat, and kicked his legs, he could shift along the wooden floor.
He needed feeding less frequently, slept long hours, and enjoyed trying to babble at Aleshia and Cameron, though he had not yet formed any coherent words. Vaneese and Gail both confirmed to Aleshia the words were coming. Vaneese had even thoughtfully bought her sister some earplugs for when the dreaded times of screaming and repeating words became the dominant thing in Aleshia’s life. After all, Aleshia worked at home. She wasn’t going to be escaping Ezra’s company any time soon.
She didn’t mind, though. The drooling, squeaking baby had wormed his way into her heart, and it felt good, to actively care and look after another human being. She was no longer number one. Ezra, helpless and reliant on his mother, had overtaken that position.
Cameron Lovell burst through the door of their home, carrying two bags of shopping from his trip back from work. She heard him scraping his sandals off in the entrance corridor, and bustle into the living room, spotting Ezra raking the teddy bear towards himself. “Hey, honey. I see we’re going to be tripping over the rug-rat soon.” He piled the bags on the kitchen surfaces, and Aleshia rose out of her chair to greet him with a quick peck on the cheek. A diamond ring glinted on her left hand, along with a golden band with a looping figure eight pattern. Cameron wore a matching band, and he quickly scooped Aleshia into a warm hug.