by Sarah Clay
“You don’t have to agree to this Livvie, you don’t owe our father anything.”
I nod along with his words, but I don’t answer him.
Instead, I’m engrossed in watching Charlie’s acceptance of Troy, well he’s accepting his pats none the less.
“Liv, you good?” Tony’s voice cuts in and I realise I still hadn’t replied.
“Yeah, sorry, yeah I think I’m good. Where is Jacks?” I turn my head back towards the television, reaching out for the remote and flicking it on.
“I’m here baby. I’ll be home soon” Jacksons declares over the line.
I can tell he’s not happy about having someone around that he doesn’t know.
But I don’t want him to rush home because of it.
“I’m okay Jacks, Dad says that he comes well recommended and he checked him out. Please don’t worry.”
I feel like it’s all he’s been able to do lately.
“Yeah well I’m running my own checks on him, we’ll talk more when I’m home okay.”
I’m not sure if his anger is directed at me or not, but I can definitely pick up on it.
“Are you upset with me?” I draw my teeth down into my lip, waiting for his response.
“No pretty girl, never. I’ll see you soon okay.”
When we hang up I stay seated on the sofa, flicking through the channels before landing on an old Adam Sandler movie.
Troy and Charlie had joined me in the room, Troy sitting on the other end of the sofa. I appreciated that he wasn’t trying to invade my space any more than he already was.
Charlie though, he was a different story. He knew my favorite way to watch TV, nudging at my legs with his nose. I pull them up, grabbing the throw blanket from over the seat and laying underneath of it.
Once I was comfortable, he jumps up beside me and nuzzles his way into our normal position.
“You guys seem to have that down to a fine art.” Troy laughs
I offer a small smile in response, reaching out to pat Charlie before turning back to watch the movie.
At some point, I finally stopped pretending like Troy wasn’t there and asked him to tell me about himself. He gladly accommodated me, answering every question I threw at him.
“Being here isn’t necessary, you know that right?” I finally get the courage to talk about the elephant in the room.
I hear him chuckle, “yeah, why’s that?”
I sit up a little, meeting his eyes before I speak.
“Victoria was the one who hurt me, and she can’t get to me anymore. Between Jackson, Cooper, and Tony I think they’ve got it pretty covered.”
Troy watches me intently, trying to gauge if my body reacts with the same conviction as my words.
“Jackson left for work today because I asked him too because I need to get back to normal. Because I feel like I’m ready too. My father has no right to try and start protecting me now when he’s never attempted it before in his life.” I grit out, sure that Troy can hear the contempt in my voice.
“I wouldn’t be so sure about that Olivia.” Troy’s solemn face expression causes me to falter.
“Your Father is a complicated man. But…” Troy pauses, clearly deciding on whether he should say what he’s about to say or not.
“But, I think you might be right. I don’t think you need me here; I don’t think you really need anyone protecting or preventing you from getting on in life.”
I feel my body relax a little now, feeling like he understands me a little more than I’d given him credit for.
∞
I jerk awake when I feel someone tucking my hair behind my ear.
“Shh baby, it’s just me.”
I rub my eyes, focusing on Jacksons form kneeling down in front of me.
I must have fallen asleep at some point. Looking around I don’t see Troy anywhere. I look back towards Jacks and see him frowning.
“I sent him home now that I’m here” he grits out, passing me a small card.
When I take it from him, I see it’s got all of Troy’s contact details on it.
I set it down beside me before reaching out and stroking his jaw, he turns slightly and places a kiss on my palm before leaning in and pressing his lips to my own.
Pulling away from me slightly before running his fingers over my face.
“I missed you today Liv” he whispers into the room causing me to smile.
“I missed you too. Are you hungry? I baked.”
He chuckles at my admission “I noticed.”
Instead of moving towards the kitchen though he kicks his shoes off and then climbs down beside me on the sofa, pulling the blanket over the both of us.
He’d obviously already let Charlie out, there was no way he’d be happy with sharing his spot.
“I want to talk to you first” he admits while wrapping his arms around me.
I copy his actions with my legs. Entwining myself to him.
“You don’t want Troy here?” I conclude for him.
He doesn’t answer straight away; he just groans into the space between us.
“I’m struggling between wanting you to feel safe and hating the idea of another guy being around you and in our home. Which as Tony tells me is a real arsehole way of looking at things.”
I laugh at the thought of Tony giving him a hard time about this, but I hear what Jackson is saying.
“I feel like all you’ve done since meeting me is worry. Having Troy around could alleviate that a little for you” I offer out, I’d been thinking it over this afternoon and I wasn’t sure if I really wanted Troy to stay or go either.
Jackson leans in kissing me gently.
“Pretty girl” he sighs out. “We worry about the ones we love because we never want to see harm or misfortune come to them.” He hugs me closer.
“You’ve had a rough couple of months, but even if that wasn’t the case…”
Jackson looks me directly in the eyes, holding my gaze.
“Babe, I will always worry about you.”
I hadn’t even realised I was chewing on my lip until he’d plucked it out with his fingers and replaced them with his mouth.
“You are the most important thing to me Liv. I don’t come from a life where I thought I’d ever feel this way about someone. But now that I do, I will always worry if you’re safe and happy and content. I can’t help it. And I don’t ever want to not have you to worry about.”
“Just maybe without the gun-wielding attacks right?” I attempt a joke; he nips at my lip causing me to giggle again.
“If you want him around if you’d feel better having him around… then I will do my best to not go all caveman about it. But I can’t promise anything.” I smile at his gesture.
Leaning in and placing soft kisses all over his hardened features.
“Charlie seems to like him,” I whisper between kisses.
He grants me with a half grunt in response, “yeah well, Charlie is a trader and forgets quickly who keeps him fed.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Jackson
We’d ended up having dinner late, after laying in each other’s arms on the couch for a little while longer.
Liv had obviously been busy in the kitchen today. I think perhaps she was trying to keep herself preoccupied.
I’d seen her facial expression just before I’d left this morning and if she wasn’t the strong girl I knew; I would have thought she was about to ask me not to go.
I hadn’t wanted to, but Megan had pulled me aside a couple of days ago and told me how important it was to let her have the control here and that’s what I was attempting to do.
I’d just finished letting Charlie in from outside and locking up downstairs. Liv had been upstairs on the phone to her father, so I’d decided to give her some time.
When I reach our bedroom, I pause. Leaning against the door frame, propping one ankle over the other.
I see Liv sitting in the middle of our bed, sketchpad open to a blank p
age, just staring at it.
“Still nothing?” I ask as I uncross my ankles and enter the room to move towards her.
She jumps a little before shaking her head, “I think I’m broken.”
I hear the uncertainty in her voice before I pick up the sketchbook and move it off of the bed.
She quickly climbs under the blankets and I join her before reaching over to switch off the bedside lamp. We’d already showered together and changed earlier.
We settle in, Liv gets comfortable in my arms, her cheek resting on my chest.
“You’re not broken babe; you’ll draw again when you’re ready.”
Her fingers trail back and forth over my stomach, offering the comfort I’ve needed since getting that phone call from her father today.
My initial reaction was FUCK NO.
But then I’d thought on it a little more and landed on, FUCKING FUCK NO.
Apparently, that was a dick way of looking at it in Tony’s eyes. I was focusing on the fact another guy would be with her and not the reassurance he could offer her.
To be honest, I didn’t like the idea that someone else needed to offer her that other than me, but he’d talked me into letting Liv make the decision. Which she had yet to do.
“I spoke to my dad...” Liv starts and stops.
I shuffle down a little so we are laying side by side. “Talk to me baby, what happened?”
I notice she’s chewing on her lip, she’s nervous to say what she’s about to say. But I remain quiet, waiting for her to continue when she’s ready.
“I told dad that as much as I appreciated the gesture, Troy was not going to be needed.”
I want to jump up and do a cheer around the room, but I don’t. Instead, I take hold of her hand.
“Is that really what you want? I told you I’ll be fine with whatever you decide.”
She snickers a little, “you say that, but I don’t know if I believe you’re capable of being okay with it.”
I scoff in mock offense, but she’s completely accurate with her assumption.
“I don’t want to put a Band-Aid on it Jacks. I want to keep dealing and coping and pushing forward.” Liv takes a deep breath.
“I feel like if I have Troy watching over me then I’d just be creating an unnecessary safety net, it’s unrealistic. I need to move past this in my own time, on my own course. As much as I want my father to feel reassured, I want to feel that for myself first.”
I tighten my hold on her hand.
“Liv, you are so busy being strong, you seem to forget that it’s okay to let weakness in to. To feel what you need to feel in order to move forward. Don’t take up permanent residency there, but let that hurt and pain in and then move past it.”
I catalog her beautiful face, worry lines and all. My eyes never staying in one place too long.
“You’re strong Liv, but embracing those weaknesses that we all have inside of us? That can only make us stronger babe.”
All of a sudden she shifts forward, pushing me back down to the mattress and leaning over the top of me. She ducks in, forging our lips together.
Moaning against her, I wrap my arms around her and pull her further into me.
“I love you Jacks” She declares between trailing kisses down my throat.
When she nips at me, I quickly grab hold of her hips and flip her over, reversing the roles. She squeals out against me.
“I love you Olivia” I add, before crushing my mouth down to hers.
∞
“What are you guys doing down here?” I whisper as not to scare her.
I’d woken up to a cold and empty bed, it was too early to be awake for the day, so I landed on the only other conclusion I could.
Three weeks had passed since I’d started working from the office a couple of times a week, Liv hated to wake me in the middle of the night with her bad dreams and her tossing around.
She’d felt bad that I wasn’t getting enough sleep to be able to function and focus on work. But I’d rather comfort my girl than sleep anyway.
I’d thrown some pants on and come on a one-man search party for her.
“Couldn’t sleep” she mumbles out, lifting her eyes up from the sketch pad in front of her.
She was sat in front of the fire, legs bent in front of her with the pad resting on her thighs. Charlie had weaseled his way in beside her, closest to the door.
It was something I had noticed he’d been doing, always putting himself between any entryways and Liv.
I move over to them, kneeling and shifting behind her. Settling my legs either side of her body.
As soon as she knows I’m comfortable, she leans backward into my chest. Letting me wrap my arms around her.
“Want to talk about it?” I feel her shake her head against me as she drifts her fingers out over the paper.
I avert my eyes to the sketch in front of us.
“You drew us, you’re drawing?” I can’t hide the surprise from my voice.
But she quickly shakes her head again.
“I was drawing us…” she shifts a little, I feel like she’s about to get up and move away so I tighten my grip around her, wanting to keep her talking.
“I was drawing this the day Victoria knocked on Cooper's door.”
Dropping my forehead to her shoulder I inhale her scent. Trying not to get lost in the memories of that day.
“It’s a beautiful sketch baby” I leave a kiss on her bare skin before looking back over at it.
“It’s an unfinished sketch.” She sighs before turning around in my arms, placing the book down beside us.
I can see the frown lines marring her beautiful face, her eyes are glassy as she looks me over. Reaching my hands up, I try and smooth the lines out with my fingers. Liv’s hand latches on to my wrist causing me to avert my eyes to hers.
I know she’s holding back on saying something, I just don’t know what.
“I don’t think I can stay here Jacks.” She’s barely audible if she had of spoken any other words I may not have caught them.
“Babe?” I murmur, my hands on her face tensing slightly with worry, not enough to hurt, never enough to hurt.
“I thought with time, I’d be okay with being here, in this house” she begins shaking her head.
I watch on as a lone tear breaks away and trails down her cheek.
“I can’t Jackson, I can’t be here. I just keep replaying it over and over.”
More tears start falling, quicker than I can wipe them away now.
“Liv, we will find another place. I will find us another place. I don’t care where we live, as long as I have you in my bed every night, I’ll be the happiest man in the world.”
She sniffles out a laugh. “Promise?”
It’s an easy one to make, I smile at my brave girl as we lock fingers, “pinkie promise.”
∞
Ten Months Later…
Jackson
We’d been in our new home now for nine months. We’d been fortunate and found it pretty quickly. I think the fact that we weren’t too picky so long as it meant we could leave the old spot quicker helped.
Luckily we’d found the perfect place, it boasted a large double garage, open plan living spaces and Liv’s favorite, an open wood fireplace. Three bedrooms, two bathrooms and an additional bungalow situated at the back of the property, separate from the main house.
We were still nearby to the mountains and hiking tracks but a little closer to the local universities now too.
Liv had come leaps and bounds since the move, she’d even enrolled as a student. She was taking on a huge course load with Media and Business Management and she still freelanced for us when she had the time.
After a month or so of being in the new house, I’d walked in the door, only to have her jump on me and start squealing.
At first, I panicked something was wrong, she was crying and squealing, her body pressed up against mine like she was trying to invade my own.
But the second she pulled away and her feet hit the ground, I could see her face clearer, they were happy tears and she was shrieking out of pure excitement.
She’d dragged me over to the bench and shown me multiple sketches she had done.
She’d still never attempted to finish the sketch of her and me, the one she’d been working on at the time of the attack.
But the work she was doing, it was magnificent.
Her schedule now was chaotic.
Between classes, working and spending time with everyone vying for her attention, I felt like I never had her to myself anymore.
If she wasn’t off doing something with Megan, she was prepping with her study groups and if she wasn’t doing that she was hanging out with her brother.
Don’t even get me started on Monday’s.
Every Monday her and Tony had a standing lunch date, neither of them willing to miss it, or include others; no matter how hard I tried to catch an invite.
Liv’s father called every other day to check in, I wouldn’t say everything was reconciled there, but they were working on it.
Unfortunately, Cooper wasn’t as forgiving as Olivia and I couldn’t say I blamed him.
However, Liv was adamant she wanted to try and work on her relationship with her father and at the end of the day what my girl wants; she gets.
∞
“Let’s just stay home today,” I grumble towards the kitchen from where I stand in the living area.