by Jennise K
I didn’t know what to say. Behind me, even Romanov was completely still. I wanted to run. I wanted to scream. I wanted to hide somewhere and just cry. But I didn’t. The feel of having Romanov’s heart beating against my back was too calming to leave. His warm arms stayed wrapped around me, rubbing his hands up and down against my arms to comfort me, to keep me from choking on my own saliva. If I left his embrace, I’d go insane.
“Dad—” I felt my knees go weak, and I was now completely slumped against my mate. “I don’t understand…Why?”
“You still don’t know why? I wanted my right! Everything is mine! I tried to make your mother understand, but she wouldn’t! I couldn’t make you give them to me—I’d look like a tosser! I just wanted those goons to shoot you on your knee! You’d be crippled, but Daddy would take care of you forever! You know that—you’re my little girl! How was I supposed to know that those idiots’ truck would have a faulty brake and end up trashing everything!”
I slumped further against Romanov. His tight arms around me were beginning to hurt. Even breathing was beginning to hurt. I couldn’t control my tears. Everything I had always thought was real was suddenly just an act. A part of me wished that my father had been cruel with me since the beginning. I wished he had hit me or constantly put me down. I wished he hadn’t been so supportive and loving. At least I would have been prepared for this. I would have been able to hate him back.
“And Lizzy? Ger?” I was so tired—I wanted to escape—but I needed answers. This man who I had thought I knew better than anyone was suddenly becoming a stranger. Had I really even known him?
“That was a coincidence.” Dad huffed, clearly offended I had asked him the question. Despite his answer, I still doubted him. I flinched, shocked that my first reaction to his answer was doubt. I didn’t think I could ever trust my father anymore. He had ruined my life, Letty’s life, and Mum’s. He had ruined everything!
“You—you killed Mum!” I suddenly screamed, launching forward with a strength I didn’t know I had. I wanted to shake this man. I wanted to shake him until he felt even a little bit of guilt.
“I didn’t kill your mother, you fool! You did! It’s all your fault! You were a surprise! I didn’t even want another baby! Still, Daddy would have taken care of you! You know that! If only you would have just gotten crippled!” My father also launched himself forward, ready to fight back.
“Shut up, Orion! You killed your wife, and your greed destroyed your family! You didn’t even tell them you’re a wolf, did you?” Romanov snapped at my father. He was so angry, his wolf’s voice came out instead of his.
I watched as my father lowered his eyes despite his will. I, on the other hand, couldn’t stop crying. My hand clutched at my chest as I tried to remember how to breathe. The dull ache in my chest was becoming more apparent by the second, and I knew another anxiety attack was about to hit me.
“Olivia! Olivia!”
“Amaleen!”
I clutched to Romanov, blinded by my anxiety. I just knew I needed to get out of here. I didn’t want to see the man behind the bars. I didn’t want to stand here in the middle of the truth—the truth that everything I had come to know was all a lie.
I shouldn’t have been born.
“Take me—” I choked, gulping in a mouthful of air as I tried to talk “—take—take me away…please!”
I barely felt Romanov turning around and speeding away nor did I hear my father who began to laugh. The walls soon became foggy, and it soon turned dark.
Maybe Dad should have succeeded in his plan that day. Maybe I should have taken a bullet through my leg. I thought of an alternative world where we were happy, and that was my last coherent thought before consciousness slipped me away and I slumped in Romanov’s arms.
~
My eyes snapped open. Immediately, the dull pain in my chest began again. Shooting up in bed, I looked around blindly before realising Romanov was sitting right next to me on the edge of the bed.
My eyes snapped to the balcony, and I realised it was already morning. I sighed, relieved.
“I had a bad dream,” I said to myself as I crawled towards Romanov until I could wrap an arm around him and swing my leg over his hips.
Immediately, his arms wrapped around my small frame, and he turned, his lips brushing my forehead. I closed my eyes, content.
“It wasn’t a dream.”
My eyes snapped open. The jolt in my chest felt like a lightning bolt. I almost flew out of his embrace, but his tight grip held me in.
“No. Listen. It wasn’t your fault. None of it was your fault. You didn’t ask your dad to marry your mother because of his greed. You didn’t ask to be born. You didn’t ask your mum to will you everything. You didn’t know your father wanted the property. You didn’t even know you owned everything. You didn’t ask your dad to make such an evil plan! You didn’t want your mum to die. It’s all because of your father. His greed. He killed your mother. He killed everyone’s happiness. Just for money. I’m sure your mother would want you healthy and well—”
I flinched. “Rome—”
“No! Just listen! I don’t care about anyone else. I’m thankful you were born. I’m thankful you didn’t get shot. I’m glad you survived! I’m glad even though it might seem like I’m selfish. I’m selfish for your existence. I’m selfish because without you, I wouldn’t be complete. I’m selfish, Olivia, because I love you. So please, I won’t stop you for mourning the loss of a father you thought you knew. But I don’t want you to lose yourself. Your father is not a good man. He is a murderer. You’re not at fault. You deserve to be happy. You need to understand that.”
I froze. My dad. My dad was a murderer. My dad killed my mother.
“Murderer,” I whispered to myself. It sounded like poison to my ears.
“Here.” Romanov put a flash drive into my palm. I stared at it before looking up at Romanov.
“Video recording of your dad confessing.”
I flinched again. Suddenly, the flash drive felt like it was burning into my skin.
“Why…why are you giving it to me?”
“Because I want you to decide what to do with it.”
I blinked. The tiny blue flash drive in my hand held someone’s future and justice. Still, I closed my fingers around it and looked away. I couldn’t find it in myself to give this up right now. I wasn’t even thinking straight. I had to think.
My grip on the evidence tightened as I looked up at my soulmate and nodded.
“Okay.”
~
Two weeks later
Madame Crawfort’s boutique
One would think that taking a time off to think things over would make decision-making all the easier. One would be crazy because nothing of that sort helped.
“Hey, sorry, but do you have this in size twelve?”
My eyes snapped up, and I immediately plastered an instinctual smile on my face while I faced the girl before me. “I believe we do, ma’am. I’ll just go check in store room if that’s okay with you?”
“Sure,” the customer replied.
Smiling back at her, I quickly made my way towards the back door, silently noticing Adyl and Fin subtly following behind me.
“They’re on the far left shelf,” Adyl silently noted as he slipped into the room and closed the door behind him. My hand found the wrapped top, and I sighed in relief at the handiness of Adyl. I was tired. Work on an ordinary day was tiring, but work on a day when my thoughts were divided amongst many other things…well, I was sure I’d fall off sooner or later.
“Thanks.” I sighed as I tiredly pulled the top from between the stack and hesitantly turned to face the man against the door.
Our eyes met before I instantly looked away. I refused to see the pity in his eyes. I refused to be pitied. Not by anyone else. Not when I already pitied myself. This was too much for my pride.
“Luna.”
I frowned. My eyes snapped up to Adyl’s again.
“L
una,” he repeated. “You’re a luna. You’re an heiress, and you’re a college student who needs to graduate. I’m your bodyguard. I’ve noticed. Get a hold of your senses.”
“I don’t think it’s every day you find out you have to send your father to jail for murder,” I spat back bitterly even though I knew it shouldn’t have. What Adyl said really offended me.
“Your father who killed your mother. Who wanted to kill you,” Adyl shot back, his eyebrows cocked up in a challenging manner before he turned around and walked out of the storeroom, leaving me in my muddled thoughts.
I wanted to cry. I wanted to punch a wall. But I followed after him
I was about to abandon my father. My father. The man who had changed my diapers. The man who had cried on my first day of pre-school just as much as I had. The man who hated me. Who had tried to kill me. The man who had killed my mother.
Why had things gone so wrong?
The door closed behind me, and I let my fingers linger on the cold, silver doorknob before turning around, putting back the smiling mask on.
“Here you go, ma’am. Would you like to try it out?”
Chapter 29
Bright blue mornings, dark dead nights.
Why must humans, so full of life, wither so?
Why must things that truly wish to live, die? While beings with no feelings live on?
Is that truly the curse that God has bestowed upon us? Is that truly the punishing fruit we must now reap? I feel so tired so often. Someone save me.
I’m afraid.
For my life is so wonderful. That darkness would always await in the corners of these cold walls and the reflection of my mirror for a chance to reach forward and grasp everything.
I feel so tired tonight. Much like I’ve felt so often lately.
Why must I be so tired?
Or am I slowly beginning to fall asleep?
– EL
“Don’t you dare fall asleep, Livia.”
“Argghh!” I banged my fist on the covers of our bed almost like a spoilt little child. The expensive black party gown sparkled against my pale skin, and I eyed my heels with weary eyes.
Romanov was hosting a business event, and like every charming host, he, too, needed to present a date.
It didn’t help that the party was today when—out of the many days in the calendar—I had to have my period, but Romanov needed me beside him. Life truly is a struggle.
The sound of the shower turning off made me perk up, trying to look nowhere near sleepy. I wasn’t sleepy anyway. Periods just made me really tired all the time.
The sharp ping of the text message tone alerted me of Abigail’s response, and I quickly grasped my iPhone, clicking open the notification. I didn’t really have plans of not going. I didn’t want to embarrass Romanov in front of his business partners, rivals, and future clients. So, I resorted to whining to Abigail, which made me feel a little better.
I froze. One minute my eyes staring at the screen, the next wide enough to challenge a saucer.
Smell it?
“I tell you not to sleep and you start daydreaming instead?”
A shrill yelp left my lips as I jumped up on the bed in shock, immediately grabbed a pillow and slammed it on my lap, my wide eyes now on Romanov.
It took only a shadow of a second for the grin on Romanov’s face to vanish. The raw concern quickly filled his brown pools, and he almost leaped forward. His hands finding my shoulder, he quickly began giving me a once-over.
“You can…you can smell it?” I whispered, my hands finding his own which were now on my cheeks.
Romanov stopped, his eyebrows frowning in confusion as his eyes left my chest and slowly travelled up to meet my eyes.
A slow moment passed in silence, but I waited. I knew Romanov was smart enough to know what I was talking about.
“Yes and no. Yes, we can smell it. But only when we want to. We tune out what we don’t want to smell whenever the need arises. So, no, I can’t smell it.”
I nodded. This was embarrassing enough as it was. The only way to salvage whatever face I had left was by letting the matter go. I reminded myself to wear body mists the next time I had my period.
“There isn’t any need to be embarrassed about, Livia.” Romanov chuckled as he leaned over me. His large, strong hand found the cushion over my lap and slowly put it away. My breath hitched when his fingers found the hair framing my neck next.
I could only shudder as I felt his warm breath fan the very sensitive skin of my neck. His fingers carefully toyed each lock aside, while his other hand still held me by my shoulder.
Seduce him? How could I seduce him when he kept seducing me all the time?
The wait was excruciatingly painful. I loved having his hands on me. I loved having his lips on me even more. A sharp gasp tore from my lips as his mouth found my neck. I grasped his coat at the onslaught of pleasure that coursed through me.
“Rome.”
His hand slipped lower. “Hmm?”
My breath hitched as his lips moved lower. “The business party.”
“Livia?”
A breath of air slipped out of my lips as I answered, “Yeah?”
“Marry me.”
I froze.
Romanov did, too. When I looked at him, he was kneeling on both his feet now, his head lowered to the ground.
My eyes scanned Romanov for a minute, silently taking it all in while the smile on my mouth grew wider and wider.
Somehow, I had never expected grandiose from Romanov. Somehow, I had always thought that it would just be a question asked completely out of nowhere.
My shaking fingers threaded his hair, and I carefully tilted his face up.
Romanov’s dark, wide eyes found mine, and instantly, he tried to lean forward.
“You fool.” I grinned as his lips met my cheeks and smacked kisses all over my face. He got up on his feet, bringing me up along with him.
“I already asked Prue for permission,” Romanov whispered as he placed a slow kiss on my jaw, his fingertip under my chin, tilting my face up until it perfectly aligned with his. At this angle, looking up at the towering man over me, I could see his wild dark hair carefully styled back tonight and the sincerity of his intentions in his pitch-black eyes.
We were just standing there, entwined in each other’s embrace. But I was forever grateful that, out of the millions of people we could be paired with, he and I were stringed together to find our way to each other.
“Marriage, huh?” I grinned, bringing my hands up and around his neck. I beamed when his arms tightened around me, and I felt myself being pressed against him closer. “You better have your wedding band on all the time.”
“Yes, ma’am.” Romanov nodded immediately. I couldn’t help but chuckle at the powerful man who held me—one of the most powerful leaders in his species—agreeing with me like an eager little boy. “And you should, too.”
~
Walking down the stairs, where I knew a small audience was waiting for our arrival, felt a little nerve-wracking. I wondered how long it would take for them to notice the ring. Maybe they already knew Romanov was going to propose?
A small blissful smile sneaked onto my lips, and I blushed. I looked up at Romanov and noticed his intense dark eyes on me. His grip on my hand tightened reassuringly, and I found myself moving closer to him as we made our way down the stairs.
“Oh my God, Roman! I’m so proud of you, my child!” Aunt Meryl swept forward and pulled Romanov into a hug, his hand still attached to mine.
“It was just a question, wasn’t it? Couldn’t expect a better way of proposing,” Grayson whispered as he leaned closer and gave me a side hug.
Unable to stop beaming, I made a weird face at the troublemaker and leaned closer. “When we first met, you came out of your room butt naked in the middle of sex. And you invited me to join in. Imagine what a disaster it’d be to your soulmate,” I whispered under my breath, careful not to let Romanov hear.
; “That’s just nasty.” Dominic shook his head at Grayson before he leaned forward a little and pulled me into a hug. “Congratulations, my queen.”
“Dom!” I giggled, smacking him on his arm and blushing. “Thank you.”
“Congratulations, Olivia.” Matthew smiled at me as he hugged me next.
It was a bit funny how the ladies were surrounding Romanov here and the boys, me.
“Thanks, Matthew. It was totally unexpected. I was actually very surprised.” I shook my head, hugging the man back. “I guess I’ll see your little twins here soon?”
Matthew’s grin widened. “Actually, they’re coming next week. Unfortunately, my wife won’t be able to make it. My mother’s a bit sick and she wants to stay back and take care of her.”
“I guess your mum and wife have a nice relationship?” I smiled.
“Oh yes.” Matthew nodded, a silly yet tired smile suddenly lighting his face. “They have this whole group thing—my mom, Charlotte, my wife, Theia, Marley, and their moms. They’re always together. It’s crazy sometimes.”
“That sounds so nice.” I smiled, sighing happily at the thought of such a tight-knit relationship between these women. I felt Romanov squeeze my hand and turned to see him being hugged by Dominic.
I wasn’t even able to see it before warm arms slammed around me. I gasped as both Aunt Meryl and Marsha squeezed me between them.
“Thank you for being my Roman’s soulmate,” Aunt Meryl whispered, her perfectly made up face unsmudged by her trailing tears.
“I’m so happy!” Marsha giggled excitedly. “This whole palace will be fit for the gods during the wedding! Oh, and only the best food will be served! You’ll see! Oh, I’m so excited!”
“Thank you, you guys!” I beamed back, gulping back the nervousness as discreetly as possible. I don’t want an extravagant wedding, though.
“Where are the rest of the help?” I asked, wondering where the all the girls were.
“Master Romanov and Matthew have given the girls a day off.” Marsha smiled.
I nodded understandingly.
“I’m sorry to be the one to ask this, but aren’t we supposed to go to a business function?” Grayson’s voice broke everyone from their daze, and I felt Romanov once again move closer, quickly leaning in and placing a soft kiss on my temple.