by Jamie Knight
“Here you go,” he said. “You owe me seventeen cents.”
“You mean I can’t put this bag on lay-away?” I joked. “I don’t know where I’m going to get that kind of money.”
“You laugh, but shit adds up,” said Kendall. “We have to save money now, so we have it in the future.”
“According to my economics professor, at the rate the dollar’s depreciating, the purchasing power will be next to nothing comparatively over the next twenty years. And that’s assuming we don’t spiral down into a depression,” said Dave.
Kendall and I turned to stare at him. Sometimes Dave could be incredibly intelligent, but most of the time he was a goofball.
“Really?” I asked. “That’s pretty depressing, in and of itself. As is the fact that I have to take that Austrian Economics class next semester.”
“Oh, it’s tight, dude,” said Dave. “The professor is so fucking fire and brimstone about the economy. Way less boring than Macro.”
“Nice,” I said, running a hand over the side of my head. Short black hairs tickled my palm. I had shaved the sides of my hair short when I started college. “That’s good to know, at least.”
I was still a little self-conscious, honestly, about making such a change to my appearance. When my dad saw it, he asked me if I was trying to reinvent myself or something.
Was I trying to look like I didn’t come from the shitty apartment complex by the lake? I told him and myself that that kind of stuff didn’t matter to me. That I was here to learn, so I could have a better life. I just thought the new cut would be a nice change.
He came around quickly, even said that he liked it. But a part of me now mused over his questions every time my hand ran across the new texture of the haircut.
I had to face facts. Being a business major was pretty boring. It all boiled down to marketing and being able to read your customer base. Still, it was something I could use when I got out of school. I could build up a nest egg and buy a house. Or at least a condo.
All my hard work studying would pay off one day. My father had struggled all his life. I wanted to do better, maybe start my own business, anything to keep from living paycheck to paycheck.
“Well, I’m going to head back to my room to study,” I said, after we’d all eaten and caught up on the day’s goings-on.
I had started feeling a little depressed. And it wasn’t because of the fact that the economy could spiral into a depression. But I couldn’t quite place what was causing it. Maybe it was just freshmen blues.
“That chick next door still partying all day and night?” asked Dave, with one brown eyebrow raised.
“Yeah,” I reported, rolling my eyes. I stood and started packing my books back into my bag. “Religious chicks. You know how they get when they’re finally away from Mom and Dad.”
“Whoa, wait, is she hot?” asked Kendall, sliding forward in his chair. “I haven’t seen her yet.”
“Eh, she’s kind of a weirdo, man,” I said with a grimace.
I had known Tina for most of my life. She was a bratty kid and that hadn’t seemed to change during her early adulthood so far. It was just my luck that my enemy neighbor from back home would now be my enemy neighbor in the dorms.
“I wouldn’t set you guys up with her. I mean, sure, she’s pretty hot, I guess, but that doesn’t make up for the fact that she and I have always hated each other.”
Saying she was pretty hot was an understatement. Tina was smoking hot. But I couldn’t let myself think about her that way. She was my enemy.
“Well, this is college,” said Dave, slapping his hand on the table. “If she’s hot, or even at all attractive, then bang her.”
I dropped my hands on the table, horrified with the thought. I liked to date as much as the next guy, but the thought of being with Tina… cruel Tina? Never. All she was… was an annoyance. Besides, there were other complications.
“I’m living down the hall from her. What the fuck do I do if I have to break up with her?” I asked.
“Dude, that’s a problem for Older Seth,” assured Dave. “Let Current Seth get some. And then let Future Seth deal with it, down the road. I’m sure he’ll figure something out.”
I rolled my eyes, grabbed my backpack, and headed back to my room.
Chapter Four
Seth
My dorm room was pretty nice, not as big as my room back home, but I enjoyed being away from my father and step-mother and on my own.
The furniture was sparse. I had a twin bed, an old wooden desk, which was banged up and dented, and a single wooden chair. Each piece was heavy wood and very sturdy but so worn they definitely looked like they’d housed fifty years of students before me.
I could just picture the 1970s guys in their bell-bottoms in here. Other students had brought in their own computer chairs and glass desks and huge computer monitors, but my family didn’t have that kind of money. So, I made do with what was provided.
I put posters up on the walls and bought myself a set of blue bedsheets. I picked up house plants, two ferns I named Action and Jackson, to make the room feel calm and soothing.
I kept my desk clear and tidy, its lamp and chair the only permanent fixtures. I tried to make it a perfect place to study and learn. For those first weeks, living in a single dorm room was kind of lonely, but there was no way around it. All the dorm rooms at Kensington State were singles.
Most students thought it was a benefit about this school, since it would suck to have to share cramped space with a roommate, especially if you didn’t get along with them. But I had to admit that sometimes I wished I had someone to talk to— other than Action and Jackson— after classes got out and I started my homework.
I opened my World History 101 book and started studying for an exam I had in the morning. But after only a few minutes, the deep pulse of dance music drifted to my ears.
I tried to ignore it, really focusing on my book by reading it out loud. But the music got louder. I sighed and scooted my chair towards the opposite end of my room. The music got louder still. I moved over to sit on my bed, trying to escape the noise, but it didn’t work.
As always, Tina had a party rocking in her dorm down the hall. I didn’t know who partied at six o’clock in the evening on a Wednesday, but not only did Tina manage to find those people, she also always hosted the party in her dorm room.
They must have had the music blasting out the windows. I mean, it was cranked. I closed my window, hoping that would help. Unfortunately, though, the dorms weren’t sound-proof like a bunker and Tina was one of those jerks who liked to blast music and aim her speakers out the window.
It didn’t surprise me. Tina had always been selfish like that.
After a few minutes of trying to study, with my ribcage vibrating from the noise, I put on some noise-canceling headphones that my grandparents had given me as a graduation present.
I tried to continue. I had no idea how anyone in the hall could stand this, but it seemed like I was the only one who complained. The last time I had to confront Tina about this, it didn’t go so well. We ended up in a screaming match out in the hall and the R.A. had to bust it up.
That was the problem with confronting Tina— she didn’t want to hear it. She would just repeatedly say, “Sorry, but I don’t have to listen to you.”
And she was right. She didn’t. The R.A. gave some namby-pamby answer about us being “both wrong” because her party wasn’t during quiet hours, but she was violating noise level “understandings.” And so, we had gone back to our respective rooms, leaving the problem unresolved.
Now, suddenly, the music got even louder, and there was yelling. I swear I could hear the conversations through my headphones. Some noise-canceling headphones they were.
Was I the only one with classes? What the fuck were the others majoring in? A bachelor’s degree in Doing Shots, followed by a master’s degree in Fucking Off?
Still, I tried to endure. There was no sense in getting mad. My pa
st experience had shown me the fucking R.A. wouldn’t do shit.
Finally, there was a crash. This was a big fucking crash that echoed through the hall. It sounded like someone took a chair and smashed it against a wall.
It was too much. I couldn’t study like this and I had an exam in the morning. I told myself that I was going to have to take matters into my own hands, because I shouldn’t have to put up with this.
I was paying the school for very expensive room and board, so that I could study. Couldn’t she party somewhere else, the selfish brat?
I threw off my headphones, got up and went into the hallway. The music could be heard throughout the hall.
I marched down to Tina’s room. I banged on the door, but I swear, the music was so loud I could barely hear my own knock. It was a small room, just like mine, and I was pounding on the door, but no one could hear me.
Fuck. They must be half deaf in there.
I tried the doorknob and I just opened the door. It was unlocked.
Fuck it, I’ll just say it swung open, I thought. There’s no way the entire campus can’t be hearing this.
Then the door opened, and I had to cover my ears.
Tina’s dorm room had been trashed. And it looked like someone had fallen over from goofing around on a chair. The desk chair and the bedside table were broken.
From what I could tell, Tina and her friends were jumping off the bed onto a pile of pillows on the floor. There were bottles and cups of soda and alcohol everywhere.
Once I was able to count them all, I found out that there were five guys and five girls total, all crammed into this tiny dorm room, having a party. It was nuts.
They didn’t seem to notice or care that I was there. I supposed they thought I was someone coming to join the party. Or else they were drunk and oblivious.
I couldn’t see who was playing the music, so I just flicked the lights off and on. They all turned to look at me.
“Hey. Hey!” I screamed.
“Who’s the hottie?” gestured one of the girls in the pile of pillows on the floor.
She looked like a groupie in those old pictures of rock bands in the 1960s, with her cut-off shorts, flowing shirt and long loose blond hair.
One of her legs trailed over and she had her foot hooked around the thigh of some guy who was leaning over to kiss some other scantily-clad girl who was on his opposite arm. I guess they were having a real life history lesson about the free love movement or something.
“Emma, I question your definition of ‘hottie’,” said Tina.
She was dancing on her bed with two other girls and one guy. Her skirt was so short, I could almost see the bottom of her rounded ass cheeks. I tried not to focus on that. The last thing I wanted was to spring a boner while having to deal with her obnoxious party.
“That’s Seth from down the hall, Emma,” she continued. “He is, sadly, more annoying than hot. Thanks for coming, Seth! But please leave and close the door, Seth!”
Emma leaned back on her elbows and regarded me through her glassy eyes.
“Don’t leave yet, Seth,” she purred.
She had a hungry look that tried to demand my attention. But I was on a mission and so I refused to meet her heavy gaze. Even if she was into me, I had no interest in any of Tina’s friends. There was nothing I wanted to check out from her library.
I politely ignored Emma and gestured for Tina to come outside into the hall.
She shouted something unintelligible at me.
“What?” I said, pointing to my ears. “It’s too loud. Will you just come out here to talk to me, please?”
Tina made an exasperated face and jumped off her bed. She stepped over the pieces of table and chair. Her foot slipped on a random, crumpled pillow case and she stumbled forward, out the door and into the hall.
I caught her before she fell on her ass and propped her up against the hallway wall by her slim shoulders. Emma and her pillow crew burst out in giggles. Mercifully, the door shut, so I could actually talk in a more measured voice.
“What the fuck, Tina? I’m trying to study,” I snapped, looking down into her blue eyes.
“Get off me!” she snapped haughtily, slapping away my hands. Then, her manner eased as she slurred, “And come on, Seth. It’s college. Lighten up.”
I released my hold on her shoulders. She wobbled and started to sink down the wall. Her blonde hair was sticking to the plaster behind her.
“It’s Wednesday evening, you maniac,” I countered. I had to reach out and steady her again. “Shit, the sororities don’t even start parties until Thursday. People are still ass-deep in class.”
“This isn’t a classroom,” she sneered, not holding my gaze.
Her right arm gestured in a wide circle, as if to prove it.
“No, it’s a dorm where I live and try to study,” I said, circling my left arm to mimic her gesture. “Which I can’t do, because you’re blasting music so loud the windows are vibrating.”
“So?”
“So, I can’t concentrate, okay?”
I rolled my eyes. I was starting to suspect I was developing extra face muscles just from eye-rolling, thanks to Tina’s frequent disruptions and bullshit.
“Tina, I have an exam tomorrow. At least turn down the music.”
“Turn down your studying,” she laughed, pushing a hand against my chest, trying to get me to back up. “Or go to the library.”
“Why don’t you go to a club?” I suggested.
I wanted to release her, but I knew she would just start slipping down again, so I kept my hands tight on her shoulders.
“None of them are open now,” she said, as if trying to sound reasonable.
“That’s right! Because who starts to party at six p.m. on a Wednesday?” I snapped, glaring at her. “Turn off the music, Maniac.”
She swatted my hands again. I let go. She took a step and stumbled towards me. I had to grab her by her narrow waist to keep her from falling into me. She was clearly loaded.
“Shit, you’re already drunk too?” I said astounded. “Are you an alcoholic?”
“No, I don’t have a problem with drinking,” she said with a grin. “I’m really good at it.”
“You’re going to flunk out in the first semester at this rate,” I said, aghast.
I had to put both hands on her waist to keep her up. She would probably pass out soon.
“What are you? My dad?” she scoffed, looking up at me, anger in her blue eyes. “You can’t tell me what to do.”
“You’re wasted, and you have five guys in your dorm room,” I argued.
“None of them are my boyfriend,” she interrupted, poking me in the chest with one finger. “I don’t have a boyfriend. So, it’s fiiiiiiine.”
Now she was beyond making sense.
“Look, we have to live in this dorm together,” I tried to reason with her. “Can you please turn down the music to normal levels?”
“Fine,” she said, clearly annoyed. She crossed her arms, covering her ample chest. “But you owe me. Next time I’m bored, you have to make some noise.”
“Fine, yeah, whatever,” I agreed, not quite sure what she meant and figuring she wouldn’t remember when she sobered up, anyway.
I opened the door to her dorm room again and helped her stumble through to her bed. Her friends kept dancing, hardly taking notice of us.
“Quiet time, guys,” Tina announced, waving a hand to get everyone’s attention. “Lame-o here needs to study.” She pointed at me.
I quickly took my hands off her and let her sink onto the bed. Her friends grumbled, but they turned down the music and began to leave. The only one who took it in stride was Emma.
“Let’s take this back to my place and out of his building!” she announced, without missing a beat. “Tina, you coming? C’mon! Don’t be ‘baaad at looove’ like Halsey, girl,” she sang at her.
The reference made no sense. Apparently all of them were too drunk to speak logically. But I was just g
lad they were leaving.
Cheers erupted as they filed out and everyone was talking about going back to Emma’s place. Tina stayed in bed.
I walked back down to my own dorm and shut the door. I was glad she stopped the party for me, finally. But I still didn’t understand the need to have had it going on at this time, anyway.
That Tina is out of her mind, I thought.
And I didn’t know why she told me none of those guys were her boyfriend. It wasn’t like I cared. The way she was acting, she was practically inviting disaster. Tina had been sheltered her whole life, and now that she was out on her own, she clearly couldn’t cope with the real world.
I sank down into my hard, wooden chair and tried to return to studying history, but thoughts of Tina wouldn’t leave my mind. It was like lately, every time I looked into her eyes, I saw something in them that I couldn’t shake. This time, it was some serious anger.
Why did she get so mad when I pointed out the obvious fact that her grades might be in trouble? Or that she had a plenty of trouble brewing with random drunk guys?
Maybe I did sound like her dad. Which sucked, because I really didn’t want to be that guy. But apparently someone needed to tell her what the fuck was what.
Whatever, I thought. It’s not really my problem or my business. I just need to focus on my own shit and get through this.
As I ran down my thoughts, I kept visualizing how she looked when she was dancing on the bed in that short, tight skirt. The rolling motion of her thighs and hips... I shook my head to try to dislodge the thought.
What an idiot, I told myself, instead. She’s just wasting her money and her time. Why even go to college if you’re just going to party?
Chapter Five
Tina
In September, Lindsay, my best friend since elementary school, came to campus to visit me. We had been friends since second grade, ever since we exchanged sandwiches for lunch.
My mom always made me peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Always. And her mom always made her bologna and cheese.