“Instead he sent someone else.”
Zahrah nodded. “He’s been a friend of my father’s since they were children. Though it would have made more sense to send Farhad, or even Hadeel, this man showed up. At first, he was like a brother—kind, helpful. But then be became creepy. Like one night I woke up and he was standing over my bed. He claimed I was screaming in my sleep and he wanted to make sure I was okay. Another time I came out of my room and he was walking around naked. I started avoiding him. Something in my gut told me to—I would leave early in the mornings before he was awake or stay out late until I was sure he’d gone to bed. About two weeks later…”
“Hold up.” Declan drew his stool closer. “He was with you for more than a week?”
“Yup. So, about the Friday, the day before he was supposed to head back to Egypt, I had to come home early because I forgot my laptop and it had a paper I was working on.” Zahrah swallowed the bile rising in her throat. “I stopped in the kitchen and poured myself some orange juice. I hadn’t realized how tired I was until I sat down to put my shoes on. When I woke up again, something heavy was on my chest.”
“No.”
She sniffled and picked at the corners of her fingers. “He had his—I mean he was…Declan he raped me.”
Declan reached for her, but Zahrah pushed him away. She couldn’t breathe and having anyone touch her in that moment only made the vile memories worse. As she told him the story, she could still taste the rancidness of his cock on her tongue. She could feel the pressure as he held her nose closed, cutting off her air, forcing her mouth open. She could still smell the liquor on his breath and feel his hands digging into her thighs. “I tried fighting but I could barely lift my arms.”
“He drugged you.”
“I think so. When I was finally able to go to the hospital, they found nothing in my system. They did a rape kit but by then there was nothing they could do. He was already gone.”
“Did you tell your father?”
“Yes. I thought if no one else could do anything my father, my father who loved me, could.” Zahrah sobbed. “Instead, he called me a whore. Told me, it was my fault. He said he made a mistake sending me to America because I’d taken on their loose ways. He told me if I didn’t apologize, I shouldn’t bother coming home. He cut off my funding and I was no longer his child.”
“Kitten…”
“The man—Gulzar—remained my father’s friend and I was out in the cold. So, I started building.” Zahrah sniffled. “I refused to fail. I lifted my business, in my kitchen. It was a one bedroom, crumbling apartment, but it was clean and mine. Within six months, I’d had made more money than I could have imagined. Soon, I bought a house, opened my store and never looked back.”
Declan reached for her again and this time she allowed him to hold her. The floodgates opened and she sobbed openly into his chest. Declan wrapped her in his arms tightly and though her mind was clouded with the fear of reliving that horrible night—she couldn’t help feeling protected, cared for.
As the tears soaked through the front of his shirt, she fisted the back of it. Declan rubbed her back while dropping soft kisses against the side of her head
“I don’t mean to be so weak,” Zahrah said.
“Weak? Kitten, to have gone through what you have and still be standing? That takes strength neither of us will ever be able to understand.”
“You’re sweet.”
“If you saw what’s raging inside me right now, you wouldn’t say that.” Declan frowned. “It’s anger…it’s raw and burning.”
“Not for me…I don’t think I’m worth any of that.”
Declan made a low sound in his throat, but didn’t address what she said. “That’s what you meant when you said your hair was all you had left to offer your husband.” Declan’s voice cracked. “Because he’s stolen everything else.”
She nodded.
He eased away from her and cradled her cheeks. “Listen to me.” He met her eyes. “I understand your feelings toward wanting to be a virgin for your husband. But your virginity is not all you are. It is not the thing that will make a man crave you.”
“Why do you crave me?”
Declan smiled but it didn’t quite reach his eyes. “We’ll talk about that at another time. What I’m trying to say is the thing that brings a man to you is you. Your smile, your kindness, the way you can see through his soul without even trying. When you find someone you think deserves what this—what he’s taken, give this man you.”
She sighed and fell against his chest again. This time, Declan didn’t push her to let go. Instead, he held her for as long as she needed to be there. When she sat back, he used his calloused thumbs to wipe her tears away then framed her cheeks.
“You do know I want to kill him.” Declan’s voice was hard. “I want to make him suffer then break him.”
“Why?”
He closed his eyes and pressed his forehead to hers.
“Declan…”
“Because he’s seen you in ways I want to.” Declan confessed. “He’s touched you in ways I wish I could.”
“But I didn’t want him to see me like that—to touch me like that.”
Declan lifted his head.
“I felt nothing but pain and fear.” She continued. “I didn’t want the first time I was with a man to leave me scared and tainted.”
“You’re not tainted.”
“I feel tainted.” She sighed. “Do you still want to lick me in places that will ruin me for other men? Can you, after hearing what happened, admit to that?”
“Yes.”
“You don’t have to lie…”
“I still want to lick you in places no man has ever tasted you.” Declan released her and backed away. “But now that I know what has happened, I’m afraid if I ever gave in to those urges, I would only be making things worse for you.”
“Damn.”
“Right now, the plan is to find Gulzar, make him lead us to whoever is behind this mess,” Declan said. “Then, we make them suffer.”
“Are you sure Gulzar isn’t behind this?”
“I don’t think he’s smart enough.”
“Well, according to the recording, they’re heading back to Alexandria.” Zahrah told him. “If we want to do anything, we’ll have to go there.”
“Copy that.” Declan intoned. “Zahrah, listen. When this is all over, you and I are going to have to make a decision.”
“On?”
Declan approached her again and framed her hijab covered cheeks with his palms. “On if you can look at me and not see Gulzar. If you can, I will never make you regret it. If you can’t, well, no hard feelings.”
“You’re telling me, you want me to think about if we can make love and I not think of the man who violated me?”
Declan winced.
“Are you going to hurt me, Declan? Are you going to do to me what he did?”
“Never.”
“Then, you’re nothing like him…and besides—I don’t want his death on your hands.”
“Okay—I’ll find him and bring him to you.” Declan whispered. “You will have control in what happens to him.”
The hurt mixed with anger flashed through his eyes. Those feelings broke her heart and scared her all at the same time. Still, as she reached up to frame his face with her palms, Zahrah loved the way he closed his eyes and dragged his cheeks against her palms. She inched forward and brushed her lips against his.
Declan opened his eyes and took a step back. “You don’t want to do that.”
“It’s just a kiss…”
He exhaled softly and kissed her tenderly before lifting his head. Zahrah took his hand and led him from the kitchen. She walked him into the bedroom she’d been using and closed the door before sitting him on the bed. She climbed on, curled her legs beneath her bum and face him. In the room lit only by a small lamp, Zahrah lifted Declan’s right hand and hooked one of his fingers under the first folds of her hijab. She held onto
his wrist and pulled back to loosen it.
“Kitten, what are you doing?” He asked.
“Shhh.” She pressed an index finger to his lips. “I want you to take it off for me.”
“You can’t mean—”
Her nodding stopped the words that seemed to be tumbling from his lips. Zahrah exhaled out her mouth and brought his hand up to another fold of her scarf.
For a long, silent moment, all Declan did was stared into his eyes. The pounding of her heart was as if it was trying to jump out her ears as he became the only man in the world to her. His muscular body was just another thing to entrance her but the way he looked at her, both heated her core and threatened to engulf her in flames.
She nodded, giving him more of a permission to do as she asked. Declan eased his hand upward slowly back to the scarf and carefully detangle the different folds. His hands trembled as he slowly continued peeling the layers away, withdrawing the decorative pins and setting them aside. Declan never once looked away from her, almost as though he was searching for a hesitation, a hint she had changed her mind.
When the scarf finally fell away, Zahrah bowed her head. Her cheeks heated from the way he stared at her, the soft way he reached back and pulled the tie from her hair.
“You’re beautiful.” The raspy of his voice stunned. “You’re so beautiful.”
She dared to meet his eyes again, even as he dragged his fingers through her hair and pushed a few strands over her shoulders to frame her face. “You did this for me.”
Zahrah nodded. “And for me. The way you’re looking at me right now, I needed that.”
“How am I looking at you?”
“Like I’m the sexiest woman you’ve ever seen. And I didn’t have to take my clothes off for you to see me that way.” Zahrah coughed. “Sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.”
Declan took her hands in his and lifted them to his lips. He dropped kisses against her wrists and fingers. “We’ll get through this. And once we’re standing on solid ground again—you and I will figure this out.”
“You promise?”
Instead of words, Declan kissed her again. This time when his lips fell atop hers, he was a little rough. But it wasn’t painful. For a second, Gulzar flashed through her mind but she stomped his memory down with thoughts of Declan’s promise. She sighed and leaned heavily into his chest, wanting this man, needing to feel him bare against her flesh.
It would have to wait. For now, she would enjoy him in every other way she could.
Slam!
“Cyclops!”
Zahrah and Declan jerked apart. She reached for her scarf while he darted out the door to find out why Darius was shouting.
“We need to go,” Darius said. “Sunshine! We have to get out of here. Right now!”
Zahrah grabbed her bag and joined them as Declan took off into the living room. He returned just as a loud engine pulled into the front yard. Darius rushed to the front window to look out. “Holy shit!” He swore. “Get down!”
Before Zahrah could register what was happening, Declan had her on the floor with his large body on top of her. Bullets tore through the house but even though she wanted to scream, Declan had a large palm over her mouth. The never-ending shower of bullets went on for an eternity. Bright lights lit up the entire room through the window and decorative glass in the door.
When they stopped, the engine revved then grew faint with distance. Darius was already on his feet and darting out the door, gun in hand. Declan stuck around and lifted me from the floor then proceeded to touch every part of me he could.
“I’m okay,” I told him. “I wasn’t hit. Let me see you. Turn around.”
“I have to back Ronin up!”
“Then hurry!” She snapped. “Turn.”
He did as she asked and when she realized he was okay, they both darted out the door to find Darius. Darius was pissed. She didn’t need a psychic to tell her. He was so much like his brother.
The two of them exchanged looks and Zahrah knew what was coming.
Carnage.
Hell.
They entered the destroyed house again and gathered our things. Thankfully, Declan had parked the car in the garage. It wasn’t caught up in the madness.
Darius climbed into the back and I sat beside Declan in the front.
“All right.” Darius tapped against the back of both my seat and Declan’s. “Let’s go fuck shit up.”
Chapter 10
Cowards.
Assholes with no back-bone at all.
They wanted to play this bullshit game of hit and run? Fine—Cyclops was perfectly fine with that. While Zahrah and Ronin snoozed along the ride, he placed a call to Tex. He wanted gear and cavalry. CIRO could only spare one person for they were in the middle of some kind of yearly drills to keep their certification. In the end, CIRO agreed to send Rei “Zero” Hakama.
Cyclops was pretty sure they’d need more than that. He frowned, checked the mirror for the millionth time to see if they were being followed. The street behind them was dark and in front of them was being lit up by their headlights to prove they were alone along the stretch of road leading into Alexandria.
Tex had found them somewhere to stay. It wasn’t as fancy as the hotel or the house they’d just left with bullet holes, but it would have to do. Cyclops didn’t mind.
About twenty minutes after he’d dozed off, Ronin awoke and leaned forward.
“Want me to take over driving?” He asked.
“I’m okay.” Cyclops replied. “We can only score one person from CIRO. We’re going to need at least one more person.”
“Want me to ask Thunder?”
“Isn’t he active.”
“No. He has some time off.” Ronin explained.
“Okay. Make the call.” Cyclops pulled the phone from his pocket and handed it over.
While Ronin called in reinforcements, Cyclops continued the drive, through darkened back streets to carry them into Alexandria. When they finally stopped, Zahrah put on a burqa and ventured into a grocery store to pick up some food. The entire time she was inside, Cyclops felt as if his heart was sitting in the pit of his throat. Whenever she vanished down an aisle, it took everything inside him not to go storming into the store.
But he couldn’t be seen. A black man in that neck of the woods stood out like a sore thumb. The last thing he wanted was to draw attention to them, give away their hand before the time was right.
“What’s the deal between you two anyway?” Ronin asked while handing back the phone.
“Who?”
“You and Sunshine.” Ronin asked.
“Why? Are you interested?”
Ronin chuckled. “Even if I was, I see the way you look at her.”
“I don’t think it matters what I want or how I look at her.” Cyclops sighed. “She’s not mine to keep.”
“Seriously?” Ronin asked. “She has a thing for you, Cyclops. Please tell me you see that.”
Cyclops said nothing. He kept his eyes on the store.
“Listen,” Ronin said. “I know you’re still a little in the trenches from Helen.”
“Don’t.”
“What I’m trying to say is—you can’t spend the rest of your life alone.” Ronin cleared his throat. “This thing has an ending—a good one because we’re going to make sure of it. So, when we get home, you’re going to sit that beautiful woman down and you’re going to tell her you have feelings for her. You’re going to tell her you want her…”
“I can’t.”
“You can’t? Or you won’t?”
Before Cyclops could speak again, Zahrah exited the supermarket, looked both ways and hurried back to the car. Cyclops leaned across the space and opened the door for her. When she climbed in, he helped her handed Ronin the bags to put on the back seat. They said nothing as Cyclops drove from the parking lot and began following the instructions Tex had given him.
The house looked as though it had seen better days. When Cyclops followe
d Zahrah and Ronin up the front steps, one of them crumbled under his weight. He frowned but said nothing until after they were inside.
The musk in the air made him angry but he and Ronin went through the house first before they settled in. Zahrah began going through the bags while the brothers set up cameras so Tex could keep an eye on the area around them. Cyclops wanted no more surprises like the one in Cairo.
After a quick, simple snack, Darius took first watch and Cyclops tried setting down for at least a nap. But the thoughts swirling through his mind left him wide awake. He thought of how close they had been to death. Then images of Zahrah and her dark hair flowing about her face like some kind of angel took over. Her hair had been soft, fragrant and he wanted nothing more than to hug her and press his face into its softness. But she had given him something she hadn’t given to any other man and he couldn’t have ruined that moment being nothing more than Gulzar.
Anger seeped through Cyclops’ veins like the slow ebb of a tide. He’d promised to bring Gulzar to her for punishment and he meant it. It would take great control not to put a bullet between the asshole’s eyes and call it a day. As much as he wanted to, he wouldn’t do that—he’d made a promise and wouldn’t break it.
After a few hours, Cyclops crawled off the sofa and let himself out the back of the door. The humid air did nothing to clear his mind. It didn’t escape him they were stuck in a country where there wouldn’t be any help. Aside from the people they knew, no one was coming to save them. He was determined to find out how deeply Zahrah’s brother was involved in this entire drama. As he stared up at the moon, he knew Hadeel was in deep. Could her brother be Malik?
Defending Zahrah Page 9