It wasn't that simple, though. Elizabeth did want his touch again, wanted it with a kind of need that almost frightened her. For some mad reason, she wanted to explain what she felt to Reade, the intense need for him coupled with the fear of what it might mean to go even a little further, and the odd sense of betrayal at the bottom of her heart that she could be thinking of anything beyond what was strictly needful at the moment.
My mother is dead, my father is dead, my brother is dead. How can I be thinking of anything as simple as a... a dalliance?
It should have been absurd. She was the daughter of a well-born family. It was true her father's family was lesser than her mother's, but she came of noble blood on both sides. Reade was a blank-shield soldier, and the idea of being attracted to him should have been out of the question.
Somehow, his touch and his kindness kept winning through. When he touched her, she wasn't thinking about what she was running from. She wasn't thinking about who she had left behind or what uncertain future might be in front of her.
When Reade touched her, it filled her up with heat and warmth and a kind of need that should have frightened her badly. She had been warned about the sins of the flesh in church, but she had never understood how very compelling they could be, how deeply and intensely someone's touch could affect her. She could see why they cautioned against it now.
The priest might have called it wickedness, but when she looked in her heart, she could feel no wickedness in what they had done at all, not when she thought of how sweet he had been, and how he had pulled back the moment he could see it was no longer bringing her the same pleasure that it had.
Her head felt as if it had been stuffed too full with the last few months and especially in the last few days. Her life in London felt like a distant dream, like a place where she was another woman entirely. Then her uncle had swept in from the North like some kind of ravaging bird, plucking her from her mourning and throwing her into a world that she simply did not understand. Then had come her flight from Blaken Keep, her rescue by Reade, and now...
So much had changed, she didn't know who she was anymore, and when she finally did fall asleep, she was walking the streets of London, but everyone she met turned away from her.
It barely felt as if Elizabeth had closed her eyes before she was torn out of sleep again by a shrill cry that rent the air. The cry sent a stab of panic through her throat, made her want to cower and to run all at once, and she fought her way out of Reade's arms, springing to her feet and looking around her with fear. The embers of the fire had died down to almost nothing, and the red glow only made the clearing where they slept more menacing.
Reade was up only a heartbeat after her, and just as he started to ask what was the matter, another scream rent the air.
Elizabeth acted without thinking. She grabbed Reade's hand, looking up at him beseechingly.
“Oh, Reade, please. Please, we have to help her, someone's hurting her, please...!”
Reade looked at her baffled, and then understanding dawned. When the scream came again, he pulled her into his arms.
“But, Reade...”
“Hush. Hush, darling, it's only a fox. They scream like women sometimes. You'll hear it often enough if you are going north. You'll soon become as used to it as the rest of us are.”
“It sounds so... so...”
“So unearthly awful, doesn't it? Here. Come sit with me and listen. My mam always said you had to do it at least once, and soon enough you'll hear the beast instead of the woman.”
A panicked part of Elizabeth still needed to go off and to help the woman who was obviously being so injured, but she took a deep breath and went to sit with Reade. He sat on the bedroll, and when she moved to sit next to him, he pulled her on his lap instead.
It was far from proper, but it felt as if it had been a long time since she had had to worry about what proper looked like. She sat on his legs, her head leaned against his shoulder, and she listened for the shriek to come again. Reade wrapped his arms around her as if it was the most natural thing in the world for him to do, and as her breathing calmed and her heartbeat returned to normal, he reached up to rub her back.
At first, she wasn't sure if she believed him, but then after a few moments, another few sharp cries, and she could hear what he heard, the beast inside the scream. The cry, when heard consistently, wasn't the shriek of a pained woman. It was clearly the yelp of a fox, and finally, she sat up a little away from Reade, still unwilling to give up his warmth entirely.
“I can hear it. But why is it crying out like that? That can't help its hunting, and if it were in pain, wouldn't it sound different?”
Reade grinned at her, easy despite the sleep she had cost him.
“Well, maybe that's something I'll tell you when you're older.”
“What? Why wouldn't you tell me, just tell me… Oh. Oh, I see.”
Reade laughed as she felt that damnable heat come up in her face again. Why couldn't she keep from blushing when she spoke with him?
“Good. I'm glad you figured it out. We still have a few hours before dawn. Shall we try to get a little more sleep?”
“Er, yes. That sounds like a good idea.”
She lay back down in his arms, but before she closed her eyes, she looked up at the sky over them. She had not stopped to truly look up at the stars since they had begun their travel, and now she was stunned by the splendor of the heavens overhead, by the deep blue of the sky, the brilliant life of the stars. She didn't realize she was staring until Reade nudged her shoulder lightly.
“You're not sleeping.”
“Neither are you!”
“And whose fault is that? What are you looking at?”
“The stars. They are not half so bright in... at home.”
If he caught that little slip, he gave no sigh, but instead, he sighed and pulled her a little closer.
“You see those three stars there? All in a row and as bright as can be? Well, follow the line of those stars, and you'll see what we in the North call the great bear, which as the story goes was once an ancestor of ours...”
Reade's voice in her ear gave her a kind of peace she had never felt before, something that sunk perfectly into her bones and made her melt against him. He had a story for every star in the sky, or so it seemed to her, and he was telling her all of them.
A short while later, her eyes were drooping, and a few minutes after that, she was sleeping, as deeply and dreamlessly as she hadn't since before everything went wrong in London. In her dreams, she heard Reade's voice, telling her about the lovers stranded on opposite sides of the sky, and how though they longed for each other, they would never again meet in this life or the next.
When Elizabeth woke from her slumber, Reade was seeing to the remains of the fire, and she realized with surprise that though her body still hurt, it was as if something in her had been healed. The aches, both physical and spiritual, were still there, but they were more distant somehow, and for the first time, she thought that perhaps everything would be all right.
Then, of course, they were attacked.
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chapter 13
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The day had dawned surprisingly clear, the golden spring sunlight coming down and making it feel a little more like summer. Reade felt as if he were shedding some kind weight that he had carried for too long. He decided to believe that it was because he was drawing ever closer to home, but there was something that told him it was more than that.
Today, Elizabeth had insisted on walking at least part of the time, and they walked with Finnian between them, as if in tacit agreement that they may not be entirely safe to walk next to one another.
When he glanced over, he could see a flash of her golden hair, a hint of her white hand, and he wondered all over again what kind of witchery she had put on him. Something in him always seemed tuned to where she was, to what she was doing and what she was feeling. He kn
ew immediately when her steps started to lag and when she needed to stop for a short while, even if it would be an hour yet before she was able to make herself ask.
There was something about the way she looked so surprised and grateful when he offered her water or food, as if she expected nothing from the world at all, as if she had been expected to meet every challenge on her lonesome.
Reade had teased her about not being ready for the harsh realities of the North, but now he was beginning to wonder if she would be more shocked by the kindness she could find here too. His travels had shown him people richer than he had ever imagined, but at the same time, they had been crueler as well. Where he grew up, everyone shared what they had, no matter how well or how poorly things were going. What would Elizabeth make of real kindness? Would it change her, or would she simply realize that her own kind heart had found a home?
Reade was so lost in thought that the first time he realized that there was a threat was when Finnian tossed his head, jerking back on the reins that Reade held. On top of the horse, resting against her own wishes, Elizabeth uttered a small cry but kept her seat.
"Reade, what's the matter with—"
Her words cut off when they both saw men appear around the bend on the road in front of them. Reade counted three, and they didn't look like they were looking to ambush people but looks could be very deceiving on the road.
They stopped as Reade and Elizabeth did, and after a startled moment, Reade realized with a sinking heart that he recognized them.
"Stay quiet," he said to Elizabeth. "Let me do the talking."
"You know these men?"
"Yes, unfortunately. Keep your eyes down, just let me talk."
The biggest man swaggered toward Reade, a wide smile on his face, but Reade didn't drop his guard or let his hand stray too far from his sword. He didn't smile in return, and the man stopped short of Reade's range.
"Well, if it isn't the youngest MacTaggart, wandering all on his own."
"It is, and I am not looking for trouble of any kind, Tavrish MacRae."
Tavrish made an exaggeratedly grievous expression, and Reade started to feel his hackles rise.
"You think we would offer you and your woman any trouble? You offend us."
"Well, I'd hate to do that. So, I and my woman will be on my way, and you shouldn't have to look at us any longer."
"Ah, but that's where you're wrong, my lad. You see, things have changed since you've been away, and all this stretch from here down to the River Channing is MacRae land. And since you'll be traveling on our land, it would only be appropriate for you to give us something for the trouble of using our road, wouldn't it?"
Reade bit back his first retort, that a MacRae couldn't hold his cock in his hand let alone a patch of land that would take a day or more to cross. When he spoke, his tone was measured and calm, like a man addressing a dog that might bite.
"That's new to me, Tavrish."
"Ah, well, it's the law, ain't it?"
Reade let the reins go, coming a little closer to Tavrish. He could feel his heart beating a little faster, his blood running a little quicker.
"No one told me that law. I suppose you could just let me through, and I'll pay you next time I come this way."
"Aye, our families are friends of old, I could see my way to doing that, especially if you would leave your woman with us for an hour or so. That would be kind, and we'd treat her well."
Reade had been mostly certain about his course of action almost from the beginning, but when he heard MacRae's loathsome offer, there were no other options available to him. As they had talked, he had drawn farther away from where Elizabeth sat on Finnian, coming closer and closer to the three men on the road.
Tavrish was the biggest one, and as Reade reckoned things, the most dangerous. The others would follow where Tavrish led, but they were cowards, and Reade was less afraid than angry that they had dared to stop him at all on a public road.
"Would you?" Reade asked, his voice neutral.
"Aye we would, and maybe—"
Whatever he said was lost as Reade drew his sword and reversed it in one quick motion, using the plain pommel to smash MacRae across the face. The other man bellowed like a wounded ox, but Reade was already turning to the other two, hitting them hard with the flat of his sword.
No reason to kill them if a beating will drive them off...
He would have been satisfied with beating the three men and sending them running, but with another roar, Tavrish drew his own sword, swinging it at Reade like a madman.
Reade fell back, and this time, he swung with all his strength, using the blade and its edge. He could see the difference between a man who wanted to hurt him and one who wanted to kill him, and Tavrish was in the second camp.
"Bloody MacTaggart whelp, I'll send your head home to your brother and see what he makes of you!"
Reade didn't bother responding, instead twisting around so that Tavrish's blow swung past him. The man managed to actually parry a blow Reade sent toward him, the impact threatening to numb his hands, and Reade fell back again, remembering just in time to stay between Elizabeth and the MacRaes.
One of Tavrish's kinsmen was still on the ground, Tavrish gave him a hard kick as he went by, swinging his sword at Reade again.
Reade thrust him back, and this time scored a cut on the other man's arm. There was no time to push his advantage, however, because there was a shout from behind him.
"I got her, I got his horse!"
Reade spun, aware that he was putting his back to his foe and at the same time completely uncaring. The other MacRae had looped around, grabbing at Finnian's reins, his head turned over his shoulder toward the fight.
In that moment, all of Reade's training left him, all of his skill at strategy and war departed. All he could see was that scum far too close to Elizabeth, far too close to the woman that a part of him recognized as his and his alone, and he roared, lunging for the man.
Finnian whinnied, turning his stocky body to one side, and that was enough for Elizabeth to kick the man hard in the head. It sent him sprawling toward Reade, who slashed at the man hard, the blow starting at his throat and descending across his shoulder.
Reade seized Finnian's reins and swung up on the horse behind Elizabeth. She was shaking like an autumn leaf, and he had to pull himself back from simply attacking the remaining men.
"I am coming through, and if you would stop me—"
Tavrish looked up at him, and something he saw in Reade's eyes made him hold up his hands.
"Go by, damn you."
It wasn't gracious, but that was all Reade wanted. He swung Finnian in a wide circle around the man he had struck down, who was choking and groaning on the road, and he sent the horse at a run down the road.
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chapter 14
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Elizabeth felt as if she were at once cold and distant from herself. She felt as if her face and her hands, every part of her that was exposed to the cold wind, had been frozen solid. She couldn't shake the image of floating somewhere above herself and behind herself, as if everything was too glassy and bright.
The only thing that kept her from flying up and away into the sky somewhere was Reade's arms around her, his warmth and his strength wrapped around her. It felt good, and that made her feel strange as well.
She had been grateful for Reade's strength before, but she hadn't clearly seen what it looked like when he did his deadly work. She had never seen a man cut with a sword like that before, and if she allowed it to, the image played over and over again in her head, the man grabbing at the reins and then Reade roaring up behind him like the wrath of an avenging angel. She remembered the solid impact of her boot against the man's head, sending him staggering straight up to Reade. She remembered Reade's sword coming down, and then... all that blood...
It might have been an hour, it might have been three hours later when Reade final
ly pulled Finnian to a halt. They hadn't galloped the entire time, but it was harder than they had pushed their poor mount before. Finnian's sides were lathered, and his flanks heaved in and out.
Reade shook his head.
“We should let him rest. The MacRaes are far enough behind us, and I don't think they'll be giving us any trouble anyway.”
Reade dismounted and helped Elizabeth down, but the moment her feet were on the ground, she scrambled away from him. She moved so quickly that she landed on her rear, and she was left staring up at Reade, who looked at her with confusion.
“Lass, what's the matter?”
It took her a few moments to get the words out. They felt like rocks in her mouth, hard and bruising, but finally, she managed.
“You killed him! You killed that man.”
Reade shrugged, and she was shocked by the confusion in his gaze.
“I might have done. It's possible, especially if they do not bind it up and get it to an herb woman soon.”
“You... you just killed him on the road.”
Reade scowled, but he came down to kneel next to her. It was both better and worse to have him on the ground with her instead of looming over her, but it made her stomach turn to think of this kind man killing another human being.
“Lass. I would not have done so if they hadn't offered us harm, and believe me, they were going to offer us harm.”
“They were... going to rob us?”
Reade's laugh had nothing humorous in it.
“The MacRaes are known throughout the area for their wretched behavior. They may have meant to rob us, or they may have meant to kill us and strip our bodies of any goods before they threw us down a ravine.”
Elizabeth shivered at the grim picture that Reade painted.
“Are... are all the Highlands like that?”
Reade looked shocked, reaching out to take her hand almost instinctively. She let him do so, and then something inside her relaxed. He felt warm, like the only warm thing in the world, and she realized that no matter what she had seen, she felt safe with him.
Claimed By The Highlander (The Highlands Warring Clan Mactaggarts Book 1) Page 7