I would have to tell Faith this was all my fault.
My tears began to fall.
I paced the hospital waiting room like a madman, stopping only to wipe my eyes and blow my nose. I refused to talk to anyone, even though the entire crew from Superstardom was standing with us. As soon Faith and I disappeared from set, her condition traveled the gossip grapevine. One after the other, production assistants, Ryne, all of the judges, camera crewmen, and producers all walked through the hospital doors. It was clear by this waiting room that Faith was loved by everyone she met. I felt responsible, so I struggled to meet anyone’s eyes.
I suddenly understood how Jax felt when I was behind those doors and didn’t begrudge him demanding answers from the doctor as quickly as he did. If Jax’s fame could get us answers, then I wanted all of them.
Thankfully, the same doctor who helped treat my poison ivy approached us solemnly. Jax moved to hold my hand. Zach also came to stand by my other shoulder. It didn’t matter how close they stood, I still felt so alone.
“Miss Randall is in stable condition. The tequila bottle you brought in seems to have been tainted with a cleaning product. The lab is still testing the bottle to determine exactly what was mixed into the alcohol. Thankfully, you got her here in record time. We immediately performed gastrointestinal decontamination and pumped her stomach. Her breathing has stabilized, but she still has burns to her mouth and lips. Your friend is extremely lucky to be alive because of your men here,” he explained, nodding to Brian and Corey. “If only we all had Marines guarding us.”
“Will she be able to sing next week?” I asked softly, daring to hope for an answer that would make my guilt feel less heavy.
“I’m sorry, but Miss Randall will likely need to remain in the hospital for the next week until we can be certain of the poison she ingested. There may be delayed side effects.”
Jax squeezed my hand. “Thank you, Doc, for all your help. Can we go in and visit with her?”
“It’s in Miss Randall’s best interest to rest for the remainder of this evening. However, first thing tomorrow I can arrange visitor passes,” he stated before a nurse approached him and whispered in his ear. “I’m terribly sorry, but I need to see to another patient.” Then he left us staring at Faith’s door.
“Did you want to go get food from the cafeteria?” Jax asked softly. I was relieved that he knew without asking that I planned on staying in this hospital until I could see for myself that she was okay.
“It might be best if we left the hospital for food,” Donny muttered. “There’s a great deal of press outside. Faith’s condition leaked on social media. If we stay any longer, the fans and press will be allowed to enter the building. It is a public hospital, after all, and Jax, you remember the last time they mobbed you in a shopping mall. It’ll be pandemonium.”
“I’m not that hungry,” I murmured to Jax. I watched the pain enter his eyes before they shifted to Zach. He knew I intended to stay, even if he couldn’t.
“You okay with staying with her here?” Jax asked Zach. “With Brian and Corey standing guard?”
Zach nodded solemnly.
“Okay, I’ll head home, lead the press away,” Jax clipped. “The moment you’re ready to join me, just let Brian know. I’ll be there waiting.”
“Thank you,” I whispered.
He squeezed my hand again and left the building.
“There won’t be an elimination evening tomorrow night,” Donny stated. “I know you probably don’t care about that right now, but I thought I should let you know. No need to attend rehearsals or go to the studio. The producers already contacted the judges’ agents to let them know that the finale schedule would be the same, but they would give you and Ryne some time to recoup after today’s incident. With Faith being injured, you and Ryne are automatically the two finalists.”
Ryne and I made eye contact over the crowd. Neither of us was smiling.
“I don’t think I want to be on the show anymore,” I began. “Ryne can be the winner.”
“Let’s not talk about this now,” Zach interrupted. “Billie is worried about her friend, and the finale is a week away. Can we just focus on Faith right now?”
“Of course,” Donny murmured before gesturing for everyone to join him in leaving.
Everyone headed out until only Ryne, Zach, Brian, and Corey remained with me.
“You don’t need to stay, Ryne,” I muttered. “I’ll let her know you were here.”
“Billie, I’m not going anywhere until I know she’s okay,” he snapped. I was shocked. The country gentleman who was always easygoing and laid back suddenly appeared ready to hit someone. I didn’t realize he cared about Faith at all. All of us contestants were going through a unique experience, apparently.
I shrugged “Okay.” I found a chair tucked in the corner and sat down. Ryne walked to the nearest wall and leaned against it.
“It’s going to be a long night,” Zach muttered before finding his own chair.
I didn’t care how long the night would be. All I cared about was seeing with my own eyes that I didn’t kill my best friend in this competition.
She looked more fragile than I imagined. Her skin was pale, and there were big yellow circles under her eyes. I tried to remind myself that it could be worse. I could be looking at her in a damn coffin.
My breath caught on a swallowed sob.
She must have heard me, because she opened her eyes and reached for her glasses on the side table. When she saw it was me, she smiled, and I wanted to cry all over again.
“I’m so, so sorry,” I told her as I rushed forward and hugged her. “This is all my fault. I should have told you some crazy person was tampering with my stuff. You never would have touched that damn bottle. I should have gone home. I risked your life for a damn singing competition.”
“Billie, I knew you had a stalker,” Faith croaked. “Everyone knows. Your guards aren’t exactly subtle. Don’t blame yourself for my stupidity.” Her face showed the pain she must have been in to say those words.
“Please don’t try and talk. I just want to let you know that I’m quitting. Ryne can have it, or they can reschedule for after you’re better. I don’t deserve to win.”
“Don’t be silly,” Faith squawked. “You love to sing. Don’t let some crazy a*hole ruin this for you. For us. Remember, if I can’t win, I want to be able to tell people I knew Billie Bishop before she was famous.”
A tear ran down my cheek, and she wiped it away.
“I don’t want to do this without you,” I muttered.
“Forget that. Do it for me,” she hissed. “Promise me you’ll pretend you’re me and love every minute you get on that stage. Make people cry and dance and it’ll be like I won.” She closed her eyes, clearly exhausted from trying to talk.
I exhaled roughly.
“If that’s what you want. Okay,” I told her. “I promise.”
She opened her eyes and smiled, squeezing my hand.
Before I could say anything else, Ryne stormed in the room. “It’s my turn,” he demanded, causing Faith to blush.
I looked at the two of them and suddenly felt very awkward standing between them. I eyed Faith quizzically, and she shrugged.
“Then I guess it’s my turn to go home,” I told Faith. “I’ll visit during the week, let you know how your rehearsals for the finale are going.”
She winked at me before I softly closed the door behind me.
Jax was waiting for me in the entryway to his house. He didn’t say anything to me when I walked in the door, just reached for my hand and pulled me into his body.
I was so exhausted I forgot that Zach was behind me.
I leaned into Jax and felt as if my problems became lighter. He bent his head and brushed his lips over my lips. “Sorry that your day has been so horrible,” he whispered. “And I’m so sorry I couldn’t be there for you. All I ever want to be is by your side.”
“Feels better now,” I replied honestly
.
“What are you going to do about the competition?” he asked, and him just knowing that this might change my feelings had my heart leaping.
“Faith made me promise to win the thing.”
“Good. Her fire and my song, no way you won’t win,” Jax muttered softly, kissing my head.
I froze. “Your song?”
“Sh*t,” Jax muttered. “Look, I thought about telling you I wrote “You’re Always There” but I didn’t want you to say no to a song you loved because of me. It’s perfect for you. I wrote it for my mom when my dad died, but it just never felt right when I would sing it.”
“Is this the only secret you were keeping from me?”
Zach started coughing behind my back, and I was reminded that we had an audience. I thought about ending this conversation and waiting, but I needed to know the answer.
“You’re in my bed every night, and we basically spend every waking moment together,” Jax replied. “I don’t have time for any other secrets.”
Zach swore, but I kept ignoring him.
“And you really think I do the song justice?” I asked nervously. “This isn’t some act of pity?”
“Billie, you are the only person I want singing that song,” Jax whispered to me. “I’m a jerk about my music, just ask Donny. I would have told Graham to find a different song for you, if your recordings hadn’t been amazing.”
“I don’t know what to say,” I confessed. “Thank you doesn’t seem enough.” I heard Zach sigh.
“You don’t need to thank me, if you hadn’t loved the song it would still be sitting in Graham’s office. I was never going to release it. Honestly, the song is more yours than it has ever been mine. I should never have called it my song, but I should have told you where it came from. I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay,” I told him softly.
“Now, do you need me to fix you some food?” Jax asked.
“That would be great,” I returned, suddenly feeling so much pressure about the finale.
After dinner, I started moving directly to the staircase like a zombie. I needed to sleep. The last twenty-four hours suddenly felt like an elephant sitting on my chest, weighing me down. Jax encouraged me to go to bed without him while he cleaned up our dinner plates.
As I started to take my first step toward Jax’s bedroom, Zach approached me.
“You’re still going to sleep with him in his room knowing he lied to you?” he asked, his eyes piercing into mine.
“It’s just a song, Zach, not an affair.”
“He can really do no wrong in your eyes, can he?” he grumbled. “I’ve never lied to you. Not once.”
“Not everyone has known each other from birth and trusts each other with every aspect of their life. It takes time. I’ve kept bigger secrets from people I’ve only known a short while.”
“He only cares about himself and promoting himself. I was okay to stand by as long as it kept you safe, hoping that once this was over, you would see him for what he truly is. But the longer I see you together, the more I know he’s brainwashed you.”
“Zach, it’s been a very long day. Get some sleep. We don’t need to be discussing my relationship with Jax or comparing it to yours and mine right now,” I begged. “I promised you once the competition was over we’d hash everything out.”
He looked like he was deep in thought before he nodded at me and stomped into the other room.
I was too tired to follow him.
Are you in love with Jax Bone or Jax Bone’s song?
Billie
The finale rehearsals had been grueling. The tabloids alternated between releasing articles about possible foul play in Faith’s mystery illness that had her dropping out of the competition and the likelihood of my relationship with Jax succeeding after the show.
Zach still wasn’t talking to me. I watched his eyes follow Jax constantly as if he were a lion ready to pounce on prey. He was constantly disappearing and reappearing. I figured he wanted to uncover some information that would have me disliking Jax but at the same time be there for me every step of the Superstardom way.
Meanwhile, I kept telling anyone who would listen that I was ready for the end of this competition.
I was sick of the attention. The lack of alone time.
However, now I was standing at the side of the stage and was one song away from it being over. I would no longer be Billie Bishop, Superstardom contestant. My whole body was shaking I was so scared.
Michael approached me, whistling. I tried to smile.
“That dress is my pièce de résistance.” He sighed. “The blue sparkles match your eyes. A little Dolly Parton with the sequin fringe to pay homage to your country roots, but something that is uniquely Billie with its conservative sheer sweetheart neckline.”
I chuckled. “It’s pretty fabulous.”
“You look like a star. You’re going to knock ’em dead, sweetie,” he murmured, and I nodded nervously. There were seven thousand audience members this evening, including my momma. I wasn’t sure I was going to do anything.
Ryne exited the stage with the crowd still roaring, and Steve, the stage manager, gestured for me to enter.
I took a deep breath and walked to my marker.
The song went by in a haze. The lights came on, the dancer they hired to perform a contemporary routine to “You’re Always There” floated around me, and my lips moved of their own accord. It was exactly as I had rehearsed. I hit every high note and moved my body just as I was told to. However, I felt as if my mind had left my body. It was as if my brain couldn’t process the fact that it was me standing on the stage for the season finale of Superstardom.
When I felt like I finally came to, my cheeks were wet and I realized I must have cried during my performance. The spotlights and smoke special effects faded away. My heart was still pounding. It was like I was in shock.
“That was fabulous,” Ryne whispered to me as he and Connor joined me on stage for our final feedback session with the judges.
I wiped some of the sweat off my forehead and grinned at him. “I don’t remember any of it,” I whispered back.
“Me either.” He chuckled. “I went on autopilot. I never understood the endless rehearsals until now. Thank God for them.”
I just nodded, unable to say anything.
Connor posed in the middle of the stage and forced Ryne and I to shift to his left as we looked at the judges. “Well, what an amazing song from Billie Bishop. Can you tell us how you convinced Jax Bone to let you sing such a personal piece of music?” he asked, the venom hidden behind smiles and forced laughter. “From the lyrics, it seems to be about his father’s tragic death. You thought you were prepared enough to convey such an important message?”
My mouth gaped for a second. I didn’t realize the show was going to share this information. “Actually, after I found out Jax Bone wrote the song, I told him he should sing it. I thought I couldn’t possibly do it justice. But after our fellow contestant Faith got injured during the semifinal, she made me promise to do everything I could to not only win this thing but to love every minute I got to spend on this stage like she did. I’ve never loved a song more,” I returned honestly.
“You’re in love with Jax Bone’s song or with Jax Bone?” Connor teased, and the audience laughed along with him. “Billie Bishop, you are making miracles tonight on this show.”
I wanted to vomit.
“Well, in just a short few moments, one of you will be singing your original song again, but this time as the winner of Superstardom.” Connor turned to the judges. “Before we announce the winner for this year’s season, do any of you have any final words or advice you’d like to impart to Ryne or Billie?”
Claudia smiled at us both. “Look, guys, this is just one step on a long ladder of success that you’re both beginning. I have no doubt you will have amazing futures in the music industry and your hometowns will be erecting signs with your names on them.”
Russell laughed. �
��These kids won’t just have hometown signs erected. They need to be prepared for giant billboards in Times Square and on the Las Vegas strip, because I don’t think they’re going anywhere but to giant recording contracts and sell-out stadium tours.”
The entire audience cheered in agreement, and I felt the pit of my stomach drop even lower. A stadium tour seemed like a crazy idea.
Connor turned to Jax, and the audience went eerily silent. “Well, Jax, we all know you’ll likely talk to Billie in private after this competition is all over.” A few people in the audience laughed, while I noticed Jax grit his teeth. “And no doubt Ryne is relieved that the judges don’t get to vote for the winner this evening. But before we find out who our latest superstar is, is there anything you would like to say to either of them?”
Jax nodded and looked intently at us both. “You’re extremely talented musicians, and each of you command the stage like professionals. I’m glad I got to witness both of your journeys through the competition, as well as Faith’s, who couldn’t be here tonight. I’m also glad we don’t pick the winner, because I honestly know there isn’t just one. Sure, for television purposes, one person will be crowned tonight and someone will get to sleep in tomorrow while the other begins a giant press tour. But the world has seen how gifted you three are, so there are no losers tonight, just different roads you’ll take to one day be sitting side by side at this table.”
I think no one imagined Jax would say something so profound. The audience was shocked into silence, and Connor seemed at a loss for words, but thankfully Ryne smiled and responded, “Thanks, man,” and suddenly the room roared.
Everyone’s cheering seemed to snap Connor back into his on-camera persona. “Well, with those kind words, it’s time for us to open the envelope.”
Ryne gripped my hand.
“And the winner of this year’s Superstardom is… Billie Bishop.”
Childish Dreams Page 20