by J. P. Comeau
I stopped at the coffee and sandwich shop across the street and ordered some food. My stomach was growling, and not even my cheeseburger-flavored protein bar would have satisfied me. As I sat at a table and waited for my takeout, I saw an attractive couple walk in holding hands. The man looked like Richard, complete with the dark beard and streaks of grey in his hair.
The woman looked much younger, too, right around my age.
It broke my heart to see them all over each other, finishing each other's sentences as they placed their order and then found a table. That could have been Richard and me, and little Addison would be with us too. I knew Richard pictured us being the perfect family at the lake on Saturday. I could see it in his eyes.
I understood his hesitation, though. Richard had a lot on his plate. New responsibilities at work, a bitch of an ex-girlfriend who was also the mother of their child he just found out about, and a nasty child custody case. Perhaps being in a relationship with me was too much stress for him, and maybe we’d work it out somewhere down the road.
It still didn’t make it any less painful, though.
After getting my food to go, I headed back to my loft and ate in silence for a while. I told Crystal that I had some work to do for my lifestyle line, but all I wanted to do was sit on the couch and think about Richard. I was constantly checking my phone to see if he’d texted me, but of course, he hadn’t.
I finally got the strength to open up my laptop and check some work emails. There was one from Marcus, the New York investor who was interested in my lifestyle line of products. It was titled: It’s Time We Met Face To Face.
It was a little exciting to hear from him again. After all, I’d worked hard on creating a line of quality products that I wanted people to enjoy. The breakup from Richard put a damper on it, though.
I double-clicked on the email and read it:
Dear Ms. Belmont,
I’m following up with you after our past two webcam sessions regarding your holistic line of products. I’d love to move forward with our partnership, but it does require you to come to New York City. Please let me know a time that is at your earliest convenience, and I’ll have my team make your flight and hotel arrangements.
I look forward to doing business with you.
Sincerely,
Marcus Bremerton
If it weren’t for Richard, I’d have told him that I could fly out as soon as he’s ready and have Crystal take all of my classes. Hell, I’d even try to convince Julianna to be a yoga instructor for a few days. But I just couldn’t fight the depression inside of me, so I bought myself some time.
Dear Mr. Bremerton,
It’s wonderful to hear from you again! I just have to work out a few things with my schedule. Allow me to get back to you tomorrow with a date that I can meet you in New York.
Sincerely,
Annie Belmont
I turned my laptop off, plugged it into the charger, and then decided to take a shower. I hated that I wasn’t more excited about meeting with the investor. It was the one thing that I’d worked so hard for with my career, and I had no excitement because I’d gotten attached to Richard.
As the hot water poured over my body, I kept thinking about Addison too. She was like another Caley, so sweet and innocent. Holding her close to me was like hugging my own child, or at least the children that I one day wanted.
I’d been friends with Richard for well over a year, and not once did I cry over him. Suddenly, I couldn’t bring myself to get excited over the possible launch of my lifestyle line because he’d hurt me. All I could think about was how badly I wanted all three of us to be a family.
The worst part was, it was all Heather’s fault. If she hadn’t shown up and caused a scene, Richard and I would still be together. He’d be the first person I told about the investor inviting me out to New York, and he’d probably even tag along with me. He was good at business deals and knew how to talk with investors.
After I got out of the shower, I dried myself off and slipped on some sweats. I was cried out for the day, but I didn’t know what to do with myself. I could sit and think about Richard, or I could move forward with my life.
I chose the latter.
Leaving my laptop plugged in, I sat on the couch and went back to working on my lifestyle line. Richard had told me about five-year business plans, and I had started one on my laptop. It was impossible not to think of him as I worked on it, though. I could still hear his voice telling me about revenue projections, knowing when to invest, and when to hold onto your money, and I wanted so badly to call him.
For a moment, I considered texting him some questions about the business. We’d eventually have to talk with each other, anyway. His brother had married my sister. A quick question about running a small business certainly seemed harmless enough.
I pulled out my phone and hovered my thumb over our text message conversation, but I couldn’t go through with sending one out. It was too soon. He probably didn’t want to hear from me, anyway. I was sure he was busy with work and dealing with his lawyer.
Like he said, he didn’t have time for a romantic relationship.
I let out a sigh and stared at my business plan. The numbers looked good, so long as everything worked out well with the investor. I had an entire binder ready that listed all of my products, starting from the priciest and ending with the least expensive. In addition to it, I also had a bag full of samples that I was planning on mailing to the investor, but would just bring them with me to New York.
That’s when I remembered that Richard’s father had a penthouse in New York City. He and I could have stayed there when I went out to visit, and maybe even brought little Addison. We could have had a whole family vacation together.
No.
We were never a family, nor were we meant to become one. I would invest all of my free time and energy into my business and no longer waste energy on men. If Richard wanted to see me again, then he would be the one to reach out to me. As it stood, at that moment, I was a free, independent woman who was about to launch her brand of products.
It was everything I had ever wanted.
I opened up my email and began typing a letter to the investor:
Dear Mr. Bremerton,
I’m following up on my earlier email regarding traveling to New York City and meeting with you. As it turns out, I can be there as soon as you’re ready. Everything has been taken care of with my yoga studio.
I look forward to hearing from you.
Sincerely,
Annie Belmont
I hit the send button and breathed a sigh of relief. A part of me was hoping to postpone meeting with the investor on the off chance that Richard reached back out to me, but I realized that was foolish. I was able to start this line of products on my own, and I’d finish it that way too.
No woman should put her life on hold for a man, and mine would move forward with or without Richard.
20
_____
RICHARD
I threw my bag down on the sofa as soon as I got back to the penthouse. It had been a long work meeting, and all I wanted to do was take a nap, but I had a conference call with Danielle, Heather, and her attorney. My work meeting hadn’t gone as well as I would have liked, which only put me in a worse mood for the conference call.
It was scheduled for two in the afternoon, which gave me a few minutes to have some lunch. I put together a quick salad with some leftover chicken, then sat down on the couch. I didn’t even want to look at my laptop or phone for emails. It felt like that’s all I did lately, and I needed to take some time for myself.
At precisely two in the afternoon, Danielle called me and conferenced in Heather and her attorney, Donald Rathburn. Per her instructions, I kept my end on mute to keep it as professional as possible.
“Donald, Heather, and Richard. Everyone’s here, so let’s begin. The last time you and I spoke, Donald, I gave you a counteroffer for the lump sum payment. My client doesn’t feel as thou
gh he should have to pay back child support either but is fine with future child support. So, where are we with the numbers, Donald?”
I heard some papers shuffling in the background, which I assumed came from Heather’s attorney. “Danielle, my client, has declined your offer. She’s holding firm at the original dollar amount plus back child support payments.”
I went over to the wet bar and poured myself a glass of whiskey. The conference call was going to be another shit-show. “Donald, your client chose to wait almost a decade before telling MY client that he even had a daughter.”
“That’s true,” Donald said, “but that still doesn’t mean he shouldn’t have to pay her. Raising a child costs a lot of money, Danielle.”
There was a moment of silence, which probably meant that Danielle was going through her paperwork, and I couldn’t keep quiet any longer.
“You want back child support, Heather? Fine. But there’s no way in hell that I’m footing the bill for your wedding. Why don’t you cash in that pearl necklace or vintage Chanel suit of yours?”
“Richard, remember what we discussed?”
I slammed the mute button and swallowed the rest of my whiskey, then ran my hands through my hair and closed my eyes. What I wouldn’t give to be saying all of this directly to Heather’s face, to watch as she clutched her precious pearls as I called out her bullshit.
“As I was saying, Danielle, my client feels she is entitled to more than just back child support. The additional money will further Addison’s education.”
“Why are you so cheap, Richard?”
My eyes bugged out as soon as I heard Heather’s voice, but I managed to stay calm.
“Heather,” her attorney said, “please let me speak.”
“Let’s move on, Donald. My client has some questions about the boarding school Heather wants Addison to attend. While he agrees that it’s a quality school and would give her a good education, he doesn’t feel it’s necessary at her age. A young child should have a home life, not one where she shares a room with a stranger and has a dormitory advisor.”
When neither Heather or Donald responded, I unmuted my phone. I hated wasting time.
“Why don’t you just admit that you’re a self-entitled, spoiled bitch Heather? Because that’s what it comes down to. You and I both know this large payment isn’t going for Addison’s boarding school, especially when she let it slip that horseback riding might get her a scholarship. Although you are a pretty shitty parent, seeing as how you’re making her take horseback riding lessons despite her being terrified of falling off.”
I waited for Danielle to chastise me again, but she didn’t. Instead, Heather spoke up.
“You want me to be honest, Richard? Fine. Our daughter is more trouble than she’s worth, and you wouldn’t know it, having spent a handful of sessions with her. She constantly wants attention, and it’s driving me crazy! Maybe if you spent more than an hour with her-“
“Well, maybe if you LET me spend more than an hour with her, ALONE, then I’d know more about her personality! And how dare you talk about our daughter this way. What kind of mother are you?”
“What kind of mother am I? What kind of father are YOU, bringing that slutty yoga instructor on the one session I allowed you to attend without me. Honestly, Richard, I can’t believe you’re questioning any of this right now.”
I could feel the adrenaline pumping through my veins as Heather spoke.
“First of all,” I retorted, “Annie is the sweetest woman I have ever met. She didn’t deserve to be treated that way on Saturday, and you should be ashamed of your behavior. Not only because it was obnoxious, but because Addison had to witness it. Although she’s probably already used to her mother being a psychotic bitch.”
“Alright,” both Danielle and Donald said into the phone.
“Richard, please calm down. This isn’t getting us anywhere.” I listened to Danielle and again slammed the mute button on my phone.
While she and Donald discussed a few things, and Heather and I waited in silence, I pulled out my phone. It was full of pictures from the previous Saturday at the lake. We had felt like such a family, Annie, Addison, and I.
I stared at the picture of Annie standing behind Addison, whose arms were stretched up, and she was smiling at her. Even though they didn’t look alike, anyone would assume they were mother and daughter. It only took a day for them to bond.
Then there was the picture of Annie helping Addison swim. She was a natural at it, too. Holding her waist as they moved toward the deeper part of the lake. Annie had even given Addison a Barbie, which was covered in dirt from Heather's tires as she sped away with Addison in the car.
My favorite picture, however, was my background photo. It was all three of us, standing in front of the lake, smiling for a picture. I had tried making something else my background since we broke up, but nothing made me nearly as happy. Every morning when I woke up, I looked at my phone and smiled.
I had never been that in love before, and it was killing me inside. There were so many times when I had wanted to text or call Annie. The time that I walked past a yoga studio and thought of her, or when I found a vintage clothing store that I knew she’d want to visit. I had even considered buying her a few things that I knew she’d like, but it was too soon. We’d see each other again eventually, but my attention needed to remain on Addison.
“Richard isn’t allowed to see Addison until my client receives her money, Danielle. I’ve made that clear.”
I poured myself another glass of whiskey and then walked over to the windows. There was no point in getting upset with Heather. She was putting her foot down, and I didn’t know how all of it would end. I was adamant that she not receive a lump sum in addition to child support payments, but on some level, I wondered if it’d be worth it just to see Addison.
“Then I guess we’re at a standstill, Donald. I’m sure you understand where we’re coming from, too. Having a child is hard and expensive, but not being told you have a child is selfish and cruel. This has caused my client a great deal of emotional stress that he may never recover from. Not to mention, that by your client's refusal to allow my client to see his daughter, she is defying a court-ordered mandate. Just letting you know. That will be discussed with the judge.”
Ain’t that the truth, I thought while looking out over New York City. I had missed out on some of the most critical years of Addison’s life, like the day she was born, her first steps, and even getting her first tooth. To make matters worse, Heather had been there for all of them and couldn’t care less.
Addison ended up with the wrong parent, and there was nothing I could do about it.
“Heather has also suffered through a tremendous amount of stress, Danielle. She had to be a single parent for several years, all of which wore her down, and that’s one of the reasons she’s sending Addison to boarding school.”
I unmuted my phone again.
“Except she didn’t have to be a single parent,” I said. “Had she reached out to me when she found out she was pregnant, Heather knows damn well that I would have been involved. I would have had no problem co-parenting Addison with her, but that’s not what she chose, Donald. She chose to keep Addison from me, and for what? Because she didn’t want to stay in River Valley?”
Again there was dead silence on the line.
“Why should I have stayed, Richard? To watch you bow down to your father instead of becoming a real man? You’re nothing like Michael! You strung me along for how many years? Of course, I wanted to get out of River Valley.”
“I think we’re getting off track again,” Danielle said.
But I was too angry.
“You’re right, Heather. I’m probably the opposite of him because I’m happy with my life. I’m not stuck with some bitch of a fiancee trying to deceive her ex-boyfriend out of thousands upon thousands of dollars. So no, Heather, I’m nothing like Michael!”
“I think we should call it a day,” Danielle sai
d. “Donald, you and I will be in touch.”
I heard her hang up with them and promptly poured myself some more whiskey. “Are you alright, Richard?”
“No, Danielle. I’m not. I’m the opposite of being alright. I had to break up with Annie because of this whole Addison situation, and it’s all because of Heather. To top it off, I know that I’ll end up paying her exactly what she wants because I have to see Addison.”
“Well, let me see what else I can do. I’ll let you know when our next conference call is, okay?”
“Okay,” was all I could say.
“And please, Richard, no matter what you do, make sure that all contact with Heather and Addison is done through me. I cannot stress this enough. In the eyes of the court, when it comes to these situations, you need to play by the rules at all times.”
“I understand.”
I angrily hung up my phone and sat on the couch, sipping the whiskey as fast as I could. I couldn’t believe that Heather was so cold and heartless, but why wouldn’t she be? That’s how she had always been, but I was simply blindsided by love back when we were together.
My thoughts kept going back to Addison. I couldn’t help but wonder what she was being told. She was young, but still pretty smart. Was Heather telling her that I didn’t want to see her anymore? Or did Addison know that I wanted to see her, but I wasn't allowed to because of legal reasons?
Not knowing was the worst part.
Even though it was still the early afternoon, I put on my pajamas and ordered some food. What I wanted was to be with Annie during all of it, but I kept telling myself that it was for the best. If we didn’t work out and Addison got attached, then it might be too much for her to handle.
But why wouldn’t we work out?
I got into bed and stared at my home screen picture, the one of all three of us smiling when we were at the lake. I never knew that I wanted a family until I met Addison and Annie. As far as I was concerned, I’d spend the rest of my life as a bachelor. I had never gotten tired of my lifestyle until these past few months.