Deva hoped that by the end of the ritual, Nikhil would relax a little. With Llyr as her companion and guardian, she finally had an excuse to spend time in the human world without worrying about the potential dangers that probably were all in her parents’ heads. And if they weren’t, this message she was about to send should solve the problem.
At the sound of splashing, she opened her eyes to see Llyr hop over a thick root and settle down on a lower one in front of her with his feet in the water on either side of hers. “Are you ready?” he asked. “Dionysus and Numa will begin the ritual. At any point if you need anything, you tell me, all right? If it’s less power, more power . . . anything.”
“All right. Just make me one promise.”
“Ask away.”
“Don’t ever shut me out to try to protect me. Especially not during this. I know I’m inexperienced, but I can’t test my limits with everyone erecting walls around me. If you think I need to push myself, I will—I can handle it.”
Llyr lifted his eyebrows and smiled. “I’m going to hold you to that. Especially after your meltdown over a little water. Getting naked is part of who we are, you know. And what you’re about to start feeling when they begin the ritual is also who we are. You are all of these things, Deva . . . It’s fine for you to want to take your time exploring your identity as a new breed of immortal, but don’t lose sight of all the individual parts, because they are all amazing.”
“I think as long as I have you to coach me, I’ll figure it out. Thank you. You can let them know I’m ready now.”
“Good.”
Chapter Four
Deva’s eyes flew open and she let out a breathy “Oh!” when the first wave of power flooded from the water up through her body a little while later. Her skin tingled with a delightful combination of warmth and electricity. Across from her, Llyr’s gaze was fixed on her face, intent and watchful despite his relaxed posture.
“How is it?” he asked.
Deva’s nipples pricked and tingled, and she was acutely conscious of the tightness of her bodice around her chest, certain that if he looked, Llyr would be able to see clearly how aroused she was. But he only looked into her eyes, though his aura had brightened considerably.
“It’s . . . amazing.”
He dipped his head and in a rougher voice said, “That was god Nirvana . . . Part of it, anyway. And it will continue for some time—they’re only just getting started. Why don’t you test your link to the bloodline? See how far you can reach.”
Deva nodded and closed her eyes, gripping the thick root she sat upon with both hands while she focused and reached out for the link.
In her mind, the bloodline blossomed, flowing outward from her consciousness like a web of brightly colored filaments. She tested the threads cautiously to gauge the strength of the links. They were strong, but only extended a short distance farther than the links she’d been aware of when first practicing the ritual.
“Not very far yet, but the links are strong. Dionysus said there were millions of humans who were part of the bloodline. Right now, all I can see are a few thousand. I think I need more power to reach farther. I don’t want to waste energy on sending the message until I can get to all of them.”
She opened her eyes and her heart skipped a beat at the hunger in Llyr’s swirling aqua eyes. He blinked and looked away, then closed his eyes and nodded. “Done. The next group will join the ritual and add their power shortly. Remember to pace yourself. If you get overwhelmed, I’m here to help.”
“You can feel it all too, can’t you?” Deva asked, then added impulsively, “You’d be back there with the rest . . . participating . . . if you weren’t with me, wouldn’t you?”
Llyr exhaled slowly through his nostrils and nodded. “My brother Thiasoi are among the reveling nymphs in Dion’s retinue. They are drunk on the god’s ambrosia now. There is a strong chance they will find mates and perhaps even produce offspring today.”
Deva’s stomach clenched. “I’m sorry you got stuck with me.”
His gaze returned to her, fierce and intense, and his jaw flexed. “I’m not sorry. And I’m not stuck with you, Deva.
“I have a confession to make. I lied yesterday. My brothers and I all volunteered to guard you when Neph made the request. When he revealed that only one of us could have the job, we nearly came to blows over who would have the honor. In the end, Neph made the choice because we were unable to compromise on our own.
“You were bound to us by blood inside that lab where Meri held us prisoner, but my brothers will break that link when they find other mates. I alone will keep that tie to you. Protecting you is my life now. I want nothing more than to fulfill that promise.”
Deva took a shaky breath and shook her head. “But you’re losing your chance to find a mate . . . to have a family. Neph could send any of the nymphs to take your place. You don’t have to do this. They need you more than I do.”
The briefest flash of hurt crossed his face and made her want to take back her words. She did need him if she intended to leave the higher realms and explore the human world, but it wasn’t fair of her to. Not when his entire race needed him more. He and his Thiasoi brothers were the last males of their race who weren’t spoken for. The other three would likely wind up with multiple nymphs apiece for mates in an effort to replenish the satyr numbers and strengthen the protection of the Haven. But Llyr would be trapped in a formal arrangement with her as nothing more than a bodyguard.
“I made a vow to my leader. I won’t break that.”
A thought occurred to her that seemed both terrifying and exhilarating. “What if I chose you as my mate?”
Llyr went very still, his eyelids sliding closed as his aura flickered wildly. The conflicting signals made it difficult for Deva to understand what he was feeling. Was he angry at her for suggesting it?
“You shouldn’t ask that,” he finally said. “It isn’t possible. Not when we still barely understand the full scope of your nature.”
“It’s because of my ursa side, isn’t it?” She expelled an exasperated huff, irritated by his subtle reminder of how potentially dangerous her fertile magic could be, if she manifested the way most ursa females did.
“That, and the fact that your existence is completely beyond our grasp. You exist outside the normal flow of nymphaea magic. The River that allows us a glimpse into the current of time. We can’t see any sign of what you will become, Deva. We have to be cautious.”
A burning ache built in her belly. “What about what I am right now? I’m just a woman trying to understand who to be. I know I’m inexperienced, but I still have desires. I crave love. And a purpose. This ritual might be my only chance to prove myself, but I need more than this. I need someone to look at me and see more than just a mystery to solve. I’m a person too.” Yet his comment about the lack of any sign of her path was a stark reminder of what was really wrong with her. She had no soul, so no wonder he refused her offer. How could she be his soul mate without that one crucial piece?
Her voice shook and her eyes burned, but another surge of the potent divine power flooded through her from the water at her feet, making her gasp in pleasure and sob at the same time. She clung to the tree root and clenched her eyes shut, struggling to hold back her tears.
When she opened her eyes, Llyr hovered in front of her, his dark brows tight with concern. He cupped her face with both hands and gazed into her eyes. “I see you, Deva. Trust me, I see you.”
Chapter Five
Deva closed her eyes, comforted by Llyr’s confession. She couldn’t let herself become distracted by him, but she appreciated the contact. Instead, she shifted her focus as well as she could away from his touch and into the every increasing hum of magic that flowed from the water up through her body.
She thought she could recognize the various essences that made themselves apparent as the day continued, and lost herself a little in the sensations. This must be what it felt like to be filled with magic.
“What is it?” Llyr asked.
“So beautiful . . . their love. Have you ever felt anything like that?” she asked, opening her eyes to look at Llyr.
Llyr’s jaw clenched and he swallowed before shaking his head. “My duty comes first.” After a second, his features softened and he smiled. “But I am happy for Neph. All the Thiasoi believed he’d foregone mating in solidarity with us, but then Nyx mated Nereus and the precedent of the Thiasoi staying unmated was broken. Then we thought he and Meri might . . .” He shook his head and snorted in disgust.
“He nearly mated her,” Deva said. “I’m glad he didn’t, even if it turned out badly. It means I’m here.”
“Yes,” Llyr said, reaching out and wrapping his hands around both her ankles beneath the water. The charge of arousal from his touch was disorienting. He laughed ruefully. “I could have done without the torture, but I’m glad you’re here too.” He slipped his hands up to her calves and gave them a squeeze. “How does the power level feel? What can you sense?”
Deva blinked at him, distracted by the warmth of his hands and the tingle of pleasure that coursed through her even stronger than the steady buzz she’d felt from the power she’d absorbed. But he was talking about the bloodline, not his touch. Forcing herself to refocus, she closed her eyes and reached for the bloodline again. The number of threads had quadrupled, but was still not expansive enough to account for all of them.
“Tell them I need more still.”
“Will do.”
She opened her eyes and watched his face as his eyelids fell shut. He possessed the same angular features and upturned, half-moon eyes as many of the nymphs, though with him and his Thiasoi brothers it was more pronounced. His hair was shiny, silken cascade, falling in blue-black waves around his broad, tan shoulders.
Deva liked the way his lighter skin tone stood out against her deep brown shade where his hands held her lower legs. His fingers seemed to involuntarily flex, squeezing, then loosening, but never completely releasing her.
Sitting there watching him, she was struck by the urge to sing. She started humming softly, closing her eyes and composing a tune in her head while she waited for more power from the ritual. When a slow, rhythmic tapping picked up against her calf in time with her humming, she opened her eyes and smiled.
“That was beautiful,” Llyr said.
She lifted a shoulder. “It was for you.”
His brow twitched. “I am honored, though I doubt I am anywhere near special enough to have earned a song.”
“That’s up to me, isn’t it? You’re my protector.” She thought about Ozzie and the place he held in her heart. A small part of her quaked with guilt over allowing this feeling to blossom for someone else, but she’d grown up around women who all had an abundance of love to share with multiple mates, and no one seemed to want for more. Her aunt Numa’s five mates all adored her, and she remembered the day Numa had made the choice to love all of them. Deva envied all the other women their freedom and the adoration of their men, and their brilliant, powerful souls they had to bind to their lovers’.
“I am, and I didn’t make that vow lightly. Even though I am here by Neph’s command, I am yours until you choose to release me from my promise.”
“What if I want to keep you forever?”
His mouth quirked. “Then you should save your breath, because I’m capable of far more song-worthy acts than sitting around in a puddle with you.”
Deva’s hungry mind refocused, reminded that Llyr was her key to exploring the human world. “Do you know a lot about humans? About their world?”
He shifted toward her and slipped his hands up to cup the backs of her knees, tapping his thumbs on her kneecaps. “Not much yet. I was out of touch for so long, trapped in Meri’s lab. But my brothers and I spent the past year getting reacquainted with the world.” He tilted his head as though considering. “Humanity is different than it used to be. But still the same, in a lot of ways. There is a lot to see—to experience.” Then he grinned. “The music is amazing.”
“Did you see a lot of our kind while you were there? Did you see any turul?” She was a tangle of questions, but forced herself to bite her tongue. She wanted to experience it all more than she wanted to hear him talk about it. But there was one thing she desperately wanted to know and was afraid to ask.
Llyr’s eyes narrowed and he shot her a knowing smile that made heat creep up her neck. “I spent some time with your father—Nikhil—and his mates and their band. They call themselves ‘Fate’s Fools,’ which is depressingly appropriate.” He chuckled and shook his head, then met her gaze again, watchful. “Ozzie West was there. He asked about you.”
The heat in her cheeks turned molten. Not even the truth of the ritual she was part of had fazed her, but the mere mention of Ozzie had her flustered to a shameful degree. “What did he say?”
“Nothing specific. Just asked if you were well. It was odd, though, because he had your father right there, yet he pulled me aside to ask. You’d visited Neph just the week before, so I’d seen you but only from afar. I told him that as far as I knew, you were great. That was pretty much the extent of it. I think he was a little drunk.”
Deva chewed on her lower lip, aching to ask more, but unwilling to admit the depth of her longing to know what kept Ozzie away.
Llyr lifted a hand and pressed his thumb to her chin, forcing her to release her lip from her teeth. “What worries you so much? Do you miss him?”
“Yes. But it’s been so long since I’ve seen him. I’m afraid he’s forgotten me. He didn’t come to the Haven for Equinox, either.”
“Do you blame him? He’s a turul without a mate, and he already knows everyone who would be here. If any of us were his One, he’d have known already. I think if I knew for certain my mate wasn’t in the Haven, I’d avoid the place too, especially on a day like today.”
A lump formed in her throat, blocking the words of denial she felt surge up. Ever since she’d returned from the safety of the god realm, she’d had the strongest sense of belonging whenever she looked at Ozzie. The last time she’d seen him, she could have sworn she felt a bond, but that had been ages ago at the last music lesson he’d given her. It was like he was avoiding her, and it hurt like hell to believe he didn’t want to see her. To hear that he’d asked about her . . . Gaia, she was so confused.
Tears burned at the corners of her eyes and she clamped her teeth down on her lower lip again in a struggle to keep from crying.
“Deva, what is it?” Llyr asked.
She shook her head and pulled away when he rested his hand on her cheek. She hated that he was here to witness her confusion, her weakness over what was likely a complete misunderstanding owing to the fact that she was too young and inexperienced with love to know any better. But the nauseating burn in her belly felt real.
“Deva, look at me.” Llyr’s stern tone snapped her attention to him. Concern darkened his eyes, his brows curling inward. Gently, he said, “Talk to me.”
She gave a little shake of her head. “I . . . can’t.”
He slipped his hand to the side of her neck, his thumb idly grazing the line of her jaw. She wished he would either stop looking at her or say something . . . redirect the conversation to anything but Ozzie . . . but his gaze kept flicking between her mouth and her eyes. Finally, his eyes slowly closed and he licked his lips, and she was sure that was the end of it. But when his eyes opened again, they were filled with a crazed determination.
His tightened his grip on her neck, and before she could take a breath, he leaned forward and pressed his mouth to hers. At the same instant, an overwhelming surge of power flowed up her legs fro
m the water and she grabbed hold of Llyr’s shoulders in a desperate attempt to cling to sanity.
But her embrace only encouraged him. He emitted a deep groan and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her down onto his lap and tight against his big, hard body. Deva surrendered to his kiss, hyperaware of every place their bodies came into contact, but oblivious of the water soaking her gown once again. She was blissfully grateful that Llyr had chosen this as the way to make her forget her confusion over Ozzie.
Chapter Six
Deva’s heart soared after that and when Llyr released her mouth she tilted her head back and sang, unable to keep the music inside. His kiss had unlocked something glorious inside her, had allowed her a freedom she hadn’t had before.
Deva let the song fade into the misty air and took a slow breath, her heart pounding. Llyr’s fingers tightened at her hips and she dropped her gaze back down to his face, bracing herself. It was silly for her to break into song in response to a kiss, but it had been a special kiss to her.
Her first kiss.
She was acutely aware of how close they were. He’d pulled her onto his lap and now they sat half-submerged in the water, her knees bracketing his hips and his thighs beneath her butt. Her hands rested on his forearms, still gently tapping the rhythm of the song that had faded a moment ago.
She swallowed and forced herself to still her fingers and to school her expression to indifference, but was sure she failed.
Llyr’s eyes were a hypnotic swirl she wished she could interpret, and she hoped the fierce grip he had on her hips was a good thing and not something to worry about.
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