Allyson pulls out her phone and taps around at the screen. “Okay, I emailed the address again so everyone can GPS out there. It’s a good twenty-minute drive outside town. If anyone needs a ride, let me know because we’ve got several parents going as chaperones and a few not going, so carpooling is a great option. I also re-sent the sign-up list so everyone who volunteered to donate can confirm what you’re bringing. We’re planning a delicious dinner, some sweet treats, and lots of fun! Everybody ready?”
“YEAH!” twelve kids roar, not even in unison. It’s more of a riot of excitement.
Everyone disperses, and I notice Michelle talking to Killian’s grandparents. “They gonna be okay?”
Allyson follows my line of vision and nods. “Yeah, Michelle is going to bring Liam, Cooper, and Killian out to the farm. The Bloomdales can’t camp anymore, of course, and Michelle offered to let Cooper hang out so that we can focus on getting everything set up. She’s going to take him from practice so we can head right out.”
She looks at me, her smirk giving away her flirty mood before she even speaks. “Though I won’t have time to take a shower between practice and camping. Is that going to be a problem?”
There’s a light in her eyes that I remember so well, and the faux-innocent seductive tone to her voice sends tingles through me. I step closer, tracing along the soft skin of her arm with the back of my hand, not wanting to be too obvious but needing to touch her.
“I already told you, Al. I’ll take you fresh and clean or sweaty and filthy. Any way I can get you.”
She shudders, and in her thin workout tank and sports bra, I can tell her nipples are diamond hard. “What’s the plan for this afternoon?”
“Oh, I’ve got big plans for you. Big, filthy, hot ones . . .” I say quietly.
“You play dirty,” she teases.
I act surprised. “I have no idea what you’re talking about. I meant that we’ve got a lot of work to do to get everything ready on the farm. If you thought I was talking about something else, that’s on you, dirty girl.”
She blushes, but her smile tells me loud and clear that she likes it. “I wish we had time to detour on the way to the farm,” she says, looking up at me through her lashes. “Even a quick one?”
“Fuck, Al. You’re gonna kill me,” I growl, stepping in front of her to block the few remaining people’s view of our hushed conversation. “I would give just about anything to drive back to your house and fuck the shit out of you, slide inside your heaven and inside your heart.” Her chest is rising and falling faster with my every word. “But we’ve got things to do, promises to fulfill. After that, I’m gonna fuck that pussy, though. I promise you that.”
“You can’t say stuff like that . . . the kids . . .” she whispers, looking around. But there’s no one close enough to hear.
She licks her lips, inviting me to kiss her, her eyes telling me how much she wants me to. I take a big breath, willing my dick to settle down, and cup her cheeks. There’s so much hope, so much possibility in the small space between us.
It’s not what she expects, but it’s what we need. I kiss her forehead instead of her lips like I want. “We need to go. The kids are counting on us.”
* * *
“Remind me again how I ended up helping you with this shit?” Mark grunts, pushing at a log to get it lined up into the circle we’re creating.
Wow, a whole sentence. Either he’s doing better or I’m asking for so much he needs to rub my nose in it.
“It’s for the kids, asshole.” James answers before I do, kicking at the other end of the same log. “Get used to it, Uncle Mark.”
We’ve got a pretty good handle on the preparations now. The guys, Bennetts and Tannens both, have been working side-by-side to do the heavy lifting, and Mama Louise and the girls swept Allyson off as soon as we got here.
I already said it once, and it’s not really our style, but I tell the guys again, “Thanks a lot for letting us do the campout here and for helping set everything up.”
“Not like you asked before planning the whole shindig.” Mark’s brow raises with the accusation, but he’s not wrong.
“I know. It just seemed like the right thing to do at the time,” I explain for what’s got to be the tenth time. He’s like a dog with a bone and won’t let it go. The only reason I haven’t bowed up at him over the whole thing is that I can see a tiny flicker in his eyes as he gives me shit. Almost like . . . he’s teasing? But I don’t know if Mark has a funny bone in his entire body. If so, it’s gotta be just the very tip of his pinkie toe or . . . what’s that tiny bone in your ear? That thing could probably hold more humor than he has in his whole body.
Bobby snorts. “He means Allyson had him by the dick and he would’ve agreed to anything she asked.”
He sounds full of piss and vinegar and I’ve had more than enough. I drop the small log I’m moving with a thud, my hands going on my hips to keep from shoving him. “What’s your problem, Bobby?”
I don’t give him a chance to answer the rhetorical question, barreling in myself. “I get it, I was a pain in your ass when all that shit went down, but I’m the one who went through the hard shit. If I can forgive her, why the hell can’t you stand down?”
He gets right up in my face, hissing, “She’s dangling everything you ever wanted in front of your face. The whole deal—her, a kid, football.” He ticks each thing off on his fingers. “Like a ready-fucking-made family, but it’s not yours. She’s not yours, that kid ain’t yours, and you’ll have a few weeks of football and then what? She’s gonna chew you up and spit you out . . . again. And I’m not gonna be the one to prop you up this time.”
My fists are curling and unfurling with how bad I want to beat the shit out of him. He’s my brother, but we’ve always been a family of fists over words. And right now, he’s spoiling for a fight I’m more than willing to give him.
“You just can’t stand that I’m happy, can you? I’ve been walking around like a damn ghost for almost ten years, your partner in every crime, but now that I’m getting what I want and have a real shot at being happy, you . . . you . . . you’re jealous!”
It hits me like a branding iron, hot and painful.
The questions, the doubts, the eye rolls as I tried to tell him about Allyson, the way he found problem after problem with our getting back together.
He laughs, but it’s sarcastic and twisted. “I ain’t jealous, motherfucker. I’m scared. I know how close to the edge you were after Allyson, after Mom, hell . . . I know just how furious you were with all that shit with Dad. And you ain’t got football to take it out on this time. You ain’t even got the Bennetts since they’re family now.
“You’ve had a knot of anger inside your chest for so long that you didn’t even feel it anymore because you’d gotten so used to it,” Bobby says, “But it’s gone now.”
He pushes at my arm, and I let him, so stunned I don’t even reply before he throws one more knife my way.
“You think you’re the observant one around here, but it never occurs to you that we’re watching you too, does it?”
I have no idea what he’s talking about, but as he looks at the other guys, I follow his eyes around our tight circle. They look ready to step in if we throw down, but also like they agree with Bobby. “We’ve seen you look like you could chew nails and spit them out, beat the shit out of people, and literally growl like an animal. Your nickname is Brutal, for fuck’s sake. And now you’re all Mr. Sunshine and Rainbows. Your shoulders are down, you smile all the damn time, and I swear you’re this close to skipping around. If I see you with a kid on your shoulders, I’m calling bullshit.”
“What. The. Hell. Are. You. Talking. About?” I enunciate slowly and clearly.
Brody clears his throat. “Uh, Brutal? He’s right, you know, though if a big fucker like you can skip, I’d pay good money to see it.” He’s trying to make a joke to defuse the situation, but Brody’s not exactly a laugh-a-minute sort so it’s a bit flat.
“You’ve been different the last few weeks. Especially since whatever happened last week.”
He lifts his brows pointedly. But I didn’t tell Brody all the nitty-gritty of my night with Allyson after I tried to tell Bobby. He hadn’t been particularly interested in listening. Maybe I picked the wrong brother to celebrate the breakthrough with Allyson with. Though looking at Brody’s brooding glare, maybe I should’ve just told Shayanne. She’d have been happy for me.
I sigh, taking my hat off and running my hands through my hair. “Okay, so I’m smiling? Shouldn’t my being happy make you happy? Isn’t that like a family thing we’re supposed to be doing? I mean, I know it’s been a while, but it seems like that’s a thing.”
Brody dips his chin. “It is, not that I’m some expert on family shit, but yeah . . . we’re happy for you or whatever.” We’re so great at talking about our feelings. “It’s just fast, real fast.”
My mouth gapes. “Fast? It’s taken ten years, for fuck’s sake!”
Bobby interjects then. “No, it’s been like a month. And most of that, you were at each other’s throat.”
“Because of a misunderstanding!” I boom. Every man tenses his shoulders, ready for battle between Bobby and me. “Ugh, damn it, Bobby! It’s not fast. It’s like we had this all planned out and things went sideways for way too long. I lost her once, but I won’t do it again. You’re right about one thing—this is what it should’ve been. Her, me, a kid. A future. And I’m gonna grab on to this chance with both fucking hands and hold on tight because I love her.”
“Fuck yeah,” Luke cheers, giving a slow clap. I can’t help but glare at him a little. He might be on my side but he’s still with my baby sister. Mark and James nod along with him. Of course they do. They’ve got wives of their own. It’s just Brody and Bobby who’re looking like we’ve all lost our minds.
Fuck. I’m becoming a Bennett.
Brody relents, though, flashing an actual teeth-baring smile and reassuring me. “Well, okay then. Why didn’t you just say so?”
I whirl on him. “What?”
He holds up his hands. “I’m just glad to see you growing up or whatever big brother shit I’m supposed to say here. Help me out,” he says, looking at Mark. They’ve gotten to be better friends working the cows every day. It’s weird and grunty, but they seem to understand each other somehow.
Mark makes one of those typical grunts and then adds, “I’m the last one to give relationship advice, so don’t ask. But if she’s the one, don’t fuck it up.”
He acts like that’s some groundbreaking suggestion, and Luke and James nod along agreeably.
Brody shrugs. “Sounds about right to me.”
Bobby shakes his head, not convinced. “Fine. Whatever. Just . . . good luck, I guess.”
With that, he walks off. But at least he heads in the direction of the other logs, so while he’s mad at me, he’s still helping us get ready for the kids who’ll be here any minute.
I sigh as he leaves. We’ve always been close, but I don’t know how to fix this. I have to take this shot with Allyson. Hell, I’m already deep in it with her, so Bobby’s just going to have to trust me on this one.
“If you don’t mind finishing up the log circle, I think I’m going to go check on Allyson. See if she got the same interrogation I did.”
They don’t look the least bit upset at the dig, and I swear I see a couple of middle fingers fly out of the corner of my eye. I ignore them, too ready to lay eyes on Allyson.
At the house, I see Mama Louise and Allyson on the back porch peeling a huge pile of potatoes. I’m about to holler out a greeting when I hear something that stops me.
“Bruce told me a bit about the two of you.” Mama Louise makes it sound casual, but it’s anything but.
Allyson pauses her potato peeling. “He did?”
Mama Louise hums. “Seems like a second chance is something you both need. You planning on taking advantage of it?”
“Wow, that’s very . . . direct.” Allyson’s resumed her potato peeling with a manic energy that belies her nerves at the question. Mama Louise is the queen of patience, so she waits Allyson out, silent and expectant. Like a newbie, Allyson speaks, giving Mama Louise exactly what she wants. “If you’d told me a few weeks ago that I’d be doing any of this—football, camping, Bruce . . . I mean, not that I’m doing Bruce. Oh, God.”
I can’t help but grin at the blush creeping up Al’s neck.
“I know quite what you mean, dear,” Mama Louise says easily. “I’m old, not dead. And John and I had a very happy marriage.”
Allyson’s laugh is small and uncomfortable, but she tries again. “This whole thing with Bruce, I never expected it. I think it was something I wanted but I’d given up on a long time ago. Maybe that’s why I was so scared?” She bites her lip, her voice quieter, and I have to strain to hear her. “But I like it. He’s good with the boys, especially Cooper. And he’s good with me, to me.”
I hear the tiny hitch in her voice and remember how she’d said her ex ‘wasn’t nice’ to her. It makes me want to spoil her, treat her so well that she never wants for anything.
It makes me want to show her what love is supposed to be like.
This is going to be the best damn campout these kids and Allyson have ever had.
Chapter 24
Allyson
I mentally check off that everyone’s here, all the food contributions are in Mama Louise’s kitchen, and with a look around, I can tell the fun has already started.
The boys are running wild like they’ve never had this much space and fresh air, their joyful shouts echoing across the land. “Look at all the trees!” Johnathan says, spinning in a circle so fast I’m surprised he stays vertical.
Oops, spoke too soon, I think as he tumbles to the ground. He doesn’t seem any worse for wear, though, as he laughs it off before hopping up.
“All right, gather up,” Bruce says, clapping his hands loudly.
The boys scramble to pile in around him, but the parents come over too, naturally drawn to Bruce’s charisma. I can’t blame them. I’m just as pulled into him, the fight I initially put up all but useless and utterly forgotten at this point.
He seems at home out here, completely in his element. It’s a good look in dusty jeans, a T-shirt that lets the tattoo on his bicep peek out as he moves, well-worn work boots, and a ballcap that’s currently turned backward as he squats down to rally the troops.
“Okay, so out here, we’re in charge. Me, my brothers, and the Bennetts, and most of all, the scariest person you’ll ever meet in your entire life . . . Mama Louise.” Bruce gestures at each of the men standing back to offer mean mug glares and ends with the small blonde who looks like she wouldn’t hurt a fly. Mama Louise gives a smile and a wave.
A few of the boys giggle like Bruce is joking, and Mama Louise’s smile falls, turning into the best mom glare I’ve ever seen. I need her to teach me that because every boy and even a few of the adults straighten right up. I even hear Killian say “Sorry, ma’am.” She flips a switch and smiles again, like all is forgiven.
“My sister, Shayanne” —Bruce points her out to everyone— “is in charge of every animal as far as you’re concerned. You don’t so much as let one sniff you without her saying it’s okay. And remember, what’s the meanest animal out here?”
He looks around the circle, and I expect the kids to answer with something like a bull or an old horse, but they laugh instead and Cooper shouts out, “Chickens! They’ll peck your hands even as you feed them.”
I have no idea what he’s talking about, but all the boys seem to think it’s hilarious.
“Okay, who’s ready for a tour then?”
Twelve skinny arms shoot up, and a few parents raise their hands too. I wiggle my fingers in the air, wanting a tour even though Bruce took me on one not too long ago. How can that be? It seems like a lifetime ago, and so much has changed since the day I came stomping out here mad as a hornet, ready to rip Bruce a new
one.
We walk, taking the same paths he took me on, through the smaller garden areas and then the larger fields with him telling the kids all about everything they see and life on a working farm. They listen raptly to his every word, following him like the Pied Piper. Eventually, we end up in the orchard, and Bruce plucks down a peach to show the boys how to tell when they’re ripe.
“These are the last ones of the season. The late bloomers, the ones that took just a bit longer to ripen and be ready, but you know what?” He pauses, and every eye is on him. “Just because they didn’t ripen first doesn’t mean they’re any less delicious. Each one is ready in its own time, and when that time’s right, they’re perfect—just as they are, when they are.” He takes big chomp out of the peach in his hand, the juiciness dripping down his fingers as he smiles at the sweet flavor. “Just right.”
Yes, he is.
Bruce Tannen is better with words than he thinks he is. He’s better with kids than I think he expected himself to be, too. He was this beast on the football field, and I know people anticipate certain things from him off the field too. The reality of who he is is so much deeper. I feel lucky to be one of the few people who get to see that side of him because while he used to be an open book, I know he’s been more the brooding type for quite some time. But still waters run deep when it comes to him.
A soft smile stretches my lips and Cooper takes my hand. He’s quiet, talking only to me. “I don’t think he’s just talking about peaches, Mom. You think maybe I’ll be ready one day too?”
I look down at my son, seeing the beautiful, happy boy he is to me. But I know he’s struggled. He’s smaller than the other boys and can’t cash the checks his mouth writes just yet. I tell him honestly, “I think you’re already perfect just the way you are now, honey. You’ll still grow and ripen a bit more, just like those peaches, but you’re doing so well. I love you.”
Rough Love Page 24