by Raven Scott
“Yeah, take a nap . . . easy.” Sputtering hiccups, Oran went limp, and I released his arm before Theo slung him over his shoulder. “That wasn’t what I expected her to say.”
“It doesn’t matter anymore. Oran should’ve listened to his pets. If they all said the same thing, they probably weren’t wrong. He’ll have to wrestle with it by himself.”
“Yeah. It just sucks ass that it had to be this way. If she did become a double agent, would you have used her?” Rubbing my jaw on the way out of the room, I shrugged carelessly. Pulling my cell out of my pocket, I quickly shot a text to Llane, and she replied almost immediately.
“I still would’ve killed her rather than risk being double-double crossed or whatever it is. The others, they would’ve lived. I think, for Oran, that’s the part he can’t stand. He could’ve prevented this, but his arrogance and high-horse attitude got in the way. Like Illya said; hopefully, he’ll learn some humility and be a little more humble and self-accepting. I’m not sure what he’ll do next, but I honestly don’t care. All my business is done. Once you drop him off with Llane, go make arrangements with Illya. You never know when someone else might come in and fuck you up.” Theo didn’t offer a reply, and I punched the elevator button with my thumb to lean against the concrete wall and run my palms up my face. “I think I’ll do the same. I owe Valerie and Natasha a trip to Vegas.”
40
Valerie
Hopping down the stairs, I pushed open the door at the end of the hall to cross the bridge, and a small smile permanently tilted my lips. No one really liked Monday, but I could feel it in my bones that something great was going to happen today. We had ample time to set up our plan, and Carlyle promised to take me on a date tonight. All the buzzing activity had calmed down seemingly overnight, and I could barely feel all the alcohol I’d drunk yesterday.
“Good morning!” Emerging into the borrowed conference room, I paused at the intensely serious air that hit me like a brick wall, and Fred glanced up from his tablet absently. “What’s up?”
“We got a lot of work to do. I wasn’t able to recover nearly as much from my tablet as I thought. Carlyle’s guy even went through it, and no luck.” Frowning slightly, I nodded as my mind whirred, and Marshal gestured to a random seat from his own at the back end of the table. “Get to it, Valerie. Where’s Natasha?”
“I thought she was here already. She wasn’t home when I woke up.” I sat down to grab the sketch pad laid out for me, and Marshal grumbled to himself as he rubbed his face. “It’s fine. Her laptop was in her room, so it wasn’t affected by the blast, right?”
“I’m just upset. I have to go back today to get my mail. My landlady said a certified letter came for me.” A soft ‘ah’ breached my lips, and Fred scoffed lowly from his seat across from me.
“You need to set that bitch straight. You two have been married for thirteen years, and it’s not like you’re neglecting her or anything. Just because she fell out of love with you doesn’t give her the right to act like a bitch.” He seemed arguably more bitter about Marshal’s impending divorce than even Marshal did, and Fred shot his friend a stern look. “Did the lawyer Carlyle promised you get back to you yet?”
“Yeah, he said he’ll be up from New York City on Wednesday, and we have that meeting with the marketer on Thursday, and . . . I’m not nearly prepared for that. The good thing, if there is one, is this lawyer is confident he can force Jenna to drop her claims. I’m sure she would once she knows what I know about the situation, but I looked up his name, and he’s really, really aggressive.” I wondered for a moment if Marshal was more torn up about his wife leaving him than what she wanted him to shell out. They’d married for a reason, after all, and her change of tune happened before we’d even met. Truthfully, I wasn’t going to pry, but Marshal didn’t seem to need any prodding as he sighed heavily. “I don’t understand why Jenna’s going after me for the house, the cars, everything. She makes more than I do . . . always has.”
“It sucks, Marshal, but everything will be okay.” My reassurance fell flat, but I had nothing else to say because I’d never been divorced. Fred grumbled to himself, and the atmosphere was decidedly negative as I tapped my pencil on my pad. Glancing between the two, I rolled my lips between my teeth as they sat, still and unproductive. “Do you guys wanna go out and have some bro time or something? We’re not going to get anything done, and the meeting on Thursday, it’s just with a marketer. It’s not like we have to pitch anything, just have a general marketing plan.”
“Yeah.” My lips twitched up sadly, and Marshal leaned back in his chair to rub his face roughly, curling his fingers into his hair. “You’re right, Val. It’s not a pitch.”
The doors at the front of the room swung open, and I twisted in my seat as Natasha and Carlyle came waltzing through. My heart stuttered at her huge smile that had never dimmed, remaining bright and perpetual like the sun.
“We’re going on vaca-a-a-tion!” Dancing a little on her way towards me, Natasha gripped the back of my chair to swing me side to side, and my brows raised in surprise. “The Vegas trip is back on! Woo!”
“What? But what about the meeting Thursday?” Confusion lilted my voice, and Natasha shook her head as Carlyle sat on the edge of the table. We had a lot to do, and vacation right now wasn’t exactly on the agenda.
“It’s not a weeklong trip, just two days. After the past few weeks, I thought you two could use some stress-free, guilt-free fun. We’ll be back late Tuesday night.” Answering my whirling questions, Carlyle caught my gaze and held it, and the gravity of his stare dragged down the corners of my mouth. “I know you were excited to go. I still have to make a trip to Reno, but the flight is only an hour.”
“O-oh . . . we were going on a date tonight.”
“We are.” My brows rose higher, and he nodded at my sister even though his gaze didn’t leave me. “I’m an innocent bystander in all this.”
“Do you just not talk to me first and go around making plans without me that involve me? I don’t really want to go right now. We have a lot to do, and you said it yourself, Carlyle. You’re not going to help us more than you already have. We succeed ourselves.” His lips thinned, and shadows played in his eyes as I crossed my arms and slumped back in my chair. “Why not let Natasha, Fred, and Marshal go together? We were just talking about them having some bro time because we’re not gonna get anything done like this.”
“What’s that supposed to mean? Bro time, by definition, excludes me, so . . . ”
“We were going to exclude you for sexy time, so what’s the difference?” Flopping my head back, I frowned at my sister as she tinged pink in the face, and I inhaled a breath through flared nostrils. “I don’t want to go. Fred and Marshal want to do something, and Carlyle only wants to go because he thought I wanted to go. What’s the difference, spending time here or in a hotel room in Vegas?”
Turning to Carlyle as I spoke, I arched a brow quizzically, and he only shook his head mutely. Silence met my question, and I hoisted myself out of the chair to walk the short distance to him. The closer I came, the more stony his expression, and my heart ached for him as I palmed his sides.
“You don’t have to have anywhere to go or anything to do to entice me to spend time with you, Carlyle. We . . . we talked about this, remember? And the only reason I wanted to go was that we could spend time together.” He had to decency to look a little guilty through the crack in his facade, and I rolled my bottom lip between my teeth to gnaw diligently. My brows furrowed, and I cupped his chin very gently when it seemed like he’d look away. “Hey, it’s hard to change what you always knew. I get that.”
Carlyle never had to answer to anyone but his father. He made decisions, and people fell over themselves to obey. He had an idea, and other people changed their plans to accommodate, not him. Everything he did was right, even when it wasn’t.
“Does anyone care if we want to go?” Carlyle blinked as Marshal cleared his throat roughly, and I didn’t protest when he l
eaned back to run his hand through his thick hair. Sliding off the table, he tugged smooth his jacket and physically shirked his feelings for the moment to nod firmly. “Because I’d really enjoy going, honestly. I have some money saved up that was supposed to go to a lawyer. Maybe, I’ll get lucky and win something cool.”
“You’re right, Valerie.” His tone thickened with an apology, and I ducked my head as a small smile crested my cheeks. Turning to Marshal and Fred, he nodded again curtly. “You should go. I’ll have Jerry do the tickets. You’ll be going with Theo and Illya, so I hope it’s not too awkward considering you’re pretty much strangers.”
“Can they drink a lot?” Nodding again at Fred’s question, Carlyle’s jaw ticked, and my coworker— or business partner?— shrugged out of the corner of my eye. “Then, we’ll be best friends by the time we get back.”
“I’ll set it up.” Casting me a long look, Carlyle slowly turned to leave the room, and I dropped into my chair to close my eyes and sigh heavily. He’d done things he wouldn’t tell me about, gone around me to Natasha about my mom, and I knew he wanted to keep me at arm’s length.
But it just . . . it didn’t work like that.
41
Carlyle
Surprise rose my brows when Oran slipped into my office, and I scanned him shrewdly as he gently shut the door behind him. He didn’t wear his glasses— he’d broken them when he attacked Roquelle— and deep, dark bags hung under his eyes. Silently sitting in the chair across from me, he rubbed his palms together, his unreadable expression and shielded eyes turning to his feet.
“I’m sorry, Carlyle.” I nearly choked on my own spit as shock rattled my spine, but Oran didn’t raise his eyes to behold the intense befuddlement that rippled across my face. My little brother never apologized for anything, let alone to me personally, and I clenched my hands into tight fists as he rasped a sigh. “I messed up. Really bad. And . . . and it made me realize . . . this thing that’s always gone on between us . . . it has to stop. A lot of my decisions have been bad ones.”
“Oran . . . ” Speechlessness was too soft a word to describe my utter lack of brain activity at this moment, and he clasped his hands tightly between his knees.
“I’m leaving tomorrow. I don’t know how long it’ll take, but I have to figure out who I am when I’m not comparing myself to you. I know that I can’t expect you to accept me back so easily, but maybe . . . maybe I won’t come back as your employee. Who knows? I need to find out.” Discomfort and shock soured my expression, but I simply nodded and cleared my throat as Oran blustered a huge, soullessly exhausted sigh. “I didn’t listen to her because I always thought I was right, even when I wasn’t. You wouldn’t have brushed that aside, but I did, and now she’s de—”
Pressing his knuckles to his mouth, Oran’s shoulders curled deeper, and my lips twitched in a sad scowl. A flurry of emotion slammed against my ribs, and I stood up to round my desk and sit against it. He turned his head in shame, and, for a flash of a second, I wondered if he could recover from what had happened.
“Oran, you made a mistake, and you’re learning from it. I know it won’t change what you had to do, but at least it won’t happen again. As much as it hurts, it was for the best for everyone. You would’ve never trusted them again, and they wouldn’t have confided in you the way you want.” Grabbing both his shoulders, I frowned under deeply knit brows at the tension thrumming through Oran, and he glanced up at me with red-rimmed, bloodshot eyes. “Don’t make the same mistakes. Trust your instincts, but also those around you. Even if it might not make sense, if you have an urge, follow it.”
“I had that same feeling she wasn’t right.” The tentative confession sent a shiver lodging between my shoulders blades, and suddenly, it all fell into place. Oran was so torn up because he could’ve prevented this. Just as I knew he would, he’d be so screwed up that he wouldn’t stay. As much as this was a victory for me professionally, it was a failure personally, and those two clashed viciously in my chest. “I thought I could break her hard enough, but I failed. I thought I was able to rewrite anything the way I wanted it, and I was wrong.”
“Sometimes, we’re wrong. I know that I haven’t exactly treated Valerie with the respect and consideration she deserves lately because I thought that I was protecting her, that I knew what was better when I really didn’t. It’s a learning curve, brother. That’s all. There’s always room for improvement.” My own guilt over the situation bled into my tone, and Oran gulped harshly as he exhaled a shuddering breath. “We’re not perfect, and we can’t think we are. People get hurt, physically or emotionally. We have to prevent that, right?”
“Yeah.” He sniffed hard, standing up slowly to rub his face and up into his hair with trembling fingers, and I released his shoulders to brace myself on my desk. “I’m going to go now, Carlyle.”
“I hope you find what you’re looking for, Oran. I really, truly do.” I don’t know what I was expecting, but Oran wrapped his arms around me and squeezed. Gingerly following suit, my cheek twitched when one of his tears seared down my neck and under my collar. He was hot, but his hands were cold, and I patted his back firmly before he drew back and nodded a jerk of his head.
“Okay.” Just as solemn and heavy-footed, Oran slunk out of my office, and I cocked my head at the closed door while my brain stalled. Did that really just happen? Did Oran, who had a beef with me for being born first, just bow out? Granted, the push I gave him was a hard one, but I didn’t expect him to react so early or so gracefully.
It gave me some hope that he’d better himself, and that opened up a window I hadn’t considered . . . maybe ever.
Having a brother, not a subordinate.
“What a concept.” Murmuring to myself, I shook my head in an effort to jolt my brain into working again, and a sigh deflated my chest. “Mateo’s next.”
“I’m glad I got that moment.” Glancing over at the sofa as Valerie sketched furiously, I frowned under furrowed brows at the concentration on her face. I’d forgotten she was here, and she scrunched up her face in an effort to draw exactly what she’d seen.
“I forgot you were here for a second. That was surprising— I didn’t expect him to withdraw so easily.” Wandering back around my desk, I couldn’t help the slight twinge of embarrassment stinging my chest. I had specifically talked about her, and she was sitting right there. Humming softly, Valerie didn’t look up from her pad, and I sat down to wiggle the mouse on the screen.
“You always talk about your siblings like you’re all at war with each other. Sometimes, you’re on the same side, but different factions, and other times, you’re on opposite sides completely. I think it was really important that you and Oran reached some sort of middle ground.” If she was flattered that I’d mentioned her, Valerie didn’t show it in her tone. She sounded proud, and I smiled at the faint reflection of myself on the screen. “Have you and Oran always been at odds like that?”
“Yeah. I suppose there were ways I could’ve helped the situation. I never wanted him around. I prefer working alone. It probably didn’t help that Mateo was the youngest, and Sonja was the only girl. It probably felt like Oran, and I competed a lot to be the best because those two spots were taken.” My voice thickened thoughtfully, but I shook my head as I leaned back in my chair to sigh heavily. “I don’t know what’ll happen. It’s kind of exciting.”
“It was a nice speech, Carlyle.” Smiling lightly, I turned my gaze to Valerie fully as she scribbled away, her lips thinned in concentration. “It’s always important to recognize your faults.”
“Thank you.” The conversation stalled, but I didn’t try to revive it as she worked furiously. She was such a good artist— with people, particularly— and I stood up to walk over to the sofa. Sitting down leisurely, I stretched my legs and flung an arm over the back of the couch, and the tiredness of the last few days hit me hard.
“If you need to talk about what happened, Valerie, I’ll listen.” She paused at my mumble, and I c
losed my eyes to sink into the thick cushions before her pencil scratching the page filled my ears. Of course, she was right— just knowing she was here, in the same room, despite not actively doing something together, was very nice.
“I don’t want to talk about it, but thanks. Honestly, I haven’t thought about it that much. It’s kinda surreal, almost like it didn’t happen. I’d like to keep it that way.” Rubbing the smooth curve of her back under her shirt, I hummed softly, the steady beat of her heart never wavering under my palm. “I’d rather fool myself into thinking she’s still out there, ignoring me and ruining herself.”
“Alright.” I mean, I could understand that, to a point. Valerie’s mother had shredded their lives with a hacksaw, and once she had disappeared, the world was right again. That didn’t mean she had to be dead— she just had to be gone. Where and how and why were meaningless, and Valerie hadn’t actually seen where the gunshot went.
For all she knew, I’d dumped her in New York City.
“Boss! Boss . . . boss . . . boss!” Bursting into my office, Carl zoomed to the bookshelf to grab the TV remote, and I arched a brow as he called me breathlessly. “It’s all over the news, about the bomb and how it’s connected to those gangbangers dropping like flies. Those guys Oran sent invitations to really work fast.”
“I knew they would. They’re professionals, and it’s quite a lot of money when it racks up.” Twenty-five thousand dollars a head was an average price, to be honest, but there were a lot of Baron Ninety-Nine members just waiting around to be killed. Carl flicked on the news, and I cracked my eyes open to watch a video of the flaming, smoking ruins of one of Pedro’s warehouses.
Valerie paused her drawing to watch the news anchor, and I felt her head stutter against my hand. That’s right. She didn’t know about this.
“They’re calling it gang warfare, but those detectives down there must realize it’s way too clean, right?” The shot of the warehouse zoomed out to a generic cop badge symbol, and I nodded firmly. “You think they’re gonna do anything about it?”