Nathanial

by J. B. Richard

  “Why haven’t ya told me about the baby?”

  She pushed up onto her elbows, looking him in the face. Her pale-blue eyes glistened. “I’ve wanted to. Lots of times” She touched his face. “There always seems to be an interruption. Elizabeth is cutting teeth, and now that she’s toddling, I hardly get a moment’s peace. And Nathanial’s been such a handful lately. He acts up every time you and Jesse have to work extra hours. He misses that time with you and doesn’t seem to know how to explain it, so instead, he turns into a brat, pushing my buttons every chance he gets. I had to give him a licking the other day. I forgot to tell you.”

  “I’m sorry, Kate.” He would give their son a good talking to.

  She kissed him. “You’re the sheriff. It’s your job … and Jesse’s. Nathanial’s old enough to understand that.”

  Nolan lay back on his pillow, still focused on Kate. She was quiet for a minute, then slipped her arms around him.

  “I’m glad we’re going to Birch Creek. All that time together, perhaps Nathanial will settle down. And I know you’re busy, but I miss spending time with you too.” Kate had never been a clingy woman. She had a good mind of her own, had organized a ladies’ auxiliary, filled in as teacher once or twice, and when Mrs. Henry, wife of the hotel owner, took sick, Kate had stepped in as cook for a week. At the end of the day, though, they had always come together as a couple and discussed the day, even if they had spent time with one another. The past two weeks hadn’t been that way, and he was sorry he failed her.

  When Nolan woke, it was to the sound of a little someone’s feet pounding up the stairs. Sunlight streamed in the windows. He rolled over, and down the hall chugged Nathanial at full steam. With a fat smile on his impish face, he sprang onto the bed right on top of his father’s guts. Nolan instantly curled, rolling Nate off, which led to a tussling match while the breathless child was trying to spit something out.

  “Pa, I can’t wait no more. Let’s pack the wagon.” Nate wiggled to free himself from Nolan’s arm lock around his waist. His son grabbed a pillow, playfully whacking him with it.

  “I surrender,” Nolan said, letting go of his son. “I need coffee before we do anything.”

  Nathanial leaped off the bed. “I’ll get it.” And just that fast, he hopped onto the banister and swiftly rode the rail downstairs.

  Nolan barely had his breakfast eaten before Nate collected everyone’s plates, then helped his ma scrape them clean, which he never volunteered to do. That child hated doing dishes maybe more than getting a whipping. His cheeks were rosy, as was Kate’s face, giving off a happy glow.

  CHAPTER 6

  With Jesse on one side and Nolan on the other, they pulled the canvas cover over the wagon. Nate had his little hands in there helping. Everyone was wound up with excitement, chattering about what needed packed, what last-minute supplies they would have to stop in town and get. The sky was sunny, so making miles before dark shouldn’t be hard.

  Nolan had wanted to put off traveling for another day. Kate had hugged a bucket twice that morning, so he’d thought she would want to rest and feel better before being bounced around inside a wagon. But she insisted they leave today, saying the fresh air would do her good.

  They came and went from the house and loaded everything they needed. It was more than Nolan would have packed, but he wasn’t about to argue with Kate about anything. It was true that lately, they hadn’t had much time for talking. With all of life’s distractions, they just weren’t doing a good enough job of finding time for each other. Elizabeth, now that she’d found her feet, was getting into everything she shouldn’t, pulling stuff out of cupboards, making messes everywhere. Nate … Well, he was ornery day or night, Monday through Sunday. And Jesse still needed guidance while learning the job of deputy and taking on more responsibility at the jailhouse.

  That was not the kind of marriage Nolan wanted, and he knew for certain that Kate would agree. This trip could help change that. He was devoted to family, but at times, duties outside the home pulled him away. He was guilty of not taking time for only Kate. She needed him too, as much as he needed her. They were a couple, after all, not just two separate people raising kids together. While traveling, there would be less to separate them from one another. He, too, was looking forward to this and had no complaints about leaving earlier than expected.

  Finally, everything was in the wagon, including Kate and Elizabeth. Nate rode in front of Jesse, who trotted his horse alongside as Nolan drove the team out of the yard and turned onto the coach road toward Gray Rock. There was no reason to list Jesse’s responsibilities while Nolan was away. As deputy, he knew what was expected.

  They bought their few extra supplies, got them packed in, and Kate and the kids tearfully hugged and kissed Jesse good-bye at least a goldarn dozen times. It wasn’t as though they would never see him again. Kate’s emotions had been hitting peaks and valleys the last few weeks, anger to sadness in the blink of an eye, and so far today, it seemed worse because their oldest son was staying behind by choice, old enough to make his own decisions. But Nolan wasn’t about to rush Kate. This trip, he hoped, would start and end well. She doted on their kids, nurturing them a little too much. Doing so while she was sickly always seemed to make her feel better, brightened her face. Though, presently, she was sobbing about who would cook for Jesse and so on and such. She couldn’t bear the thought of him going hungry.

  “Kate.” Nolan called her attention. “Jesse’s a grown man. If he starves, then it’s his own stupid fault.”

  Her mother bear claws showed as she smacked one fist to a hip while holding Elizabeth perched on the other. Her lips pursed and Nolan expected to hear it, but Jesse intervened.

  “Now, Ma. The sheriff’s right. I ain’t no boy.” His charming grin was contagious, and Kate smiled. Jesse took her hand. “Let me help ya into the wagon.” He gave her and Elizabeth a lift up. Then he peeled Nate off his back and handed him over. “Good-bye, sir. Safe travels.” They firmly shook hands.

  Nolan slapped leather to the team, the wagon jerked forward into a steady roll, and Nate waved out the back flap until Jesse was no longer in sight. Mile after mile, the wagon creaked along, making good time. The road wasn’t rutty from rain because there’d been none lately. The horses kicked up a little dust, but nothing choking. It didn’t even reach into the air as far as their noses. Nate was reading aloud from a dime novel Jesse had ordered for him. Kate had her arm around the boy’s shoulders, and their daughter was on her lap. This was exactly what Nolan needed. Time like this was worth more than gold, but every other thought reverted to that mountain couple.

  It was possible for the man, Walter, to return instead of going on to Buttonwood. Jesse had a good head on his shoulders and by nature, like Nolan, was a cautious man. He’d be leery of any stranger. So far, no women in close proximity to Gray Rock had been snatched, and they wanted to keep it that way. Other than folks passing through town on the stage, that couple was the only new people to plant themselves in Gray Rock. Why set up a home if they planned on stealing women?

  “Nolan, stop. I’m gonna be—” Kate leaned over the side, retching.

  With a mighty yank, he halted the team. Nate and Elizabeth nearly went flying off the seat. He threw out an arm, stopping them from falling.

  How much longer could this sickness go on? He should have gone with his first instinct and stayed home today and traveled tomorrow. He’d even thought about taking her to see Doc. Why had he let her talk him out of resting for a day before a week of riding in a jarring wagon? Sometimes he was a darn fool when it came to that woman.

  Nolan jumped down and hustled around to the other side. She was climbing down, and he gave a hand. Sweat beaded her head, and he couldn’t recall her ever being so pale, not even when she was carrying Elizabeth. Now that Kate was steady on her feet. He took Elizabeth from Nathanial.

  “Nate, get me a blanket,” Nolan said.

  The boy hopped over the seat into the bed and tossed Nolan a
groundsheet in a matter of a few seconds. It seemed their son was also worried about his mama. Nolan spread the piece of patchwork on the ground under the shade of a tall block of trees. Kate immediately lay down, closing her eyes. For a first, he noticed how ill-fitting her clothing hung on her, or maybe it was just that dress. Either way, she had lost more weight than he’d realized, and she wasn’t a big person to begin with. That worried him.

  A shallow creek snaked through the meadow where ash and maples were rooted, and long branches overhead supplied the needed canopy of shade. Near the water, the air was slightly cooler. It might be good for Kate. A body could breathe easier when the air wasn’t sticky, and the day was warm.

  “Kate, we’re turning around. I’m taking ya to see Doc. Birch Creek is a far trip. It might be too much for ya.” He gently dabbed at her head with a handkerchief.

  Nate came over with a canteen, thrusting it toward his ma, who had opened her eyes and sat up. “Maybe this’ll help.” Then he turned on his pa. “Pa, I wanna go to Birch Creek.” He stomped his feet. “What about Deputy?”

  Nolan understood that Nathanial wanted to play with his best buddy, but he would not risk Kate’s health or that of the baby. It twisted him up inside seeing her so sick. There would be other opportunities to visit the Huckabees. Yes, the holiday celebration would be lots of fun for everyone, but it wasn’t worth risking Kate possibly getting sicker along the way and no doctor being close. What if this illness turned out to be a complication with the pregnancy and not just morning sickness?

  “We’re not going home, sweetheart,” Kate interjected, reaching for Nate’s wrist, pulling him down next to her and patting his leg. She coddled their kids too damn much at times. It wasn’t a sin to take care of herself, especially when she was obviously ill.

  “The hell we ain’t.” Nolan was firm.

  Elizabeth began to fuss, reaching for her mother. Maybe she’d felt his muscles tense or sensed the shift in mood. Kate reached up and took the baby.

  Nate jumped to his feet, kicking at the dirt. Of course their son didn’t want to go home, and Nolan was in no mood to put up with a fit.

  “I’ll walk if I have to.” The boy smarted off.

  “There will be none of that,” Kate said as though she were really saying they were going on. Since when had she become the head of this family? Mostly, they talked things out together, not usually in front of the kids, for good reason. “Kate we’re turning back. Nathanial, water the team. Then get in the wagon.”

  “No.” The boy stood his ground next to his ma.

  Nolan grabbed their son’s arm, twisting him around, and with the flat of his hand, he smacked Nate’s ass three hard swats. Tears streaked down the boy’s face. His bawling made Elizabeth cry, and she had her little face tucked into their mama’s bosom. Kate hugged all over their daughter and gave him the evil eye.

  He ignored that for the moment and looked hard at the boy. “You don’t talk to me that way. Now I told you to go water the horses.

  Nathanial shot off in the direction of the team while wiping at his eyes.

  “There’s no reason to go home.” Kate pertly sat up straighter as if he didn’t have reason to be concerned. “I’ll be fine.”

  “Ya don’t have me convinced. This is every day. And it seems to have gotten worse since we left.” He jerked his head toward the mess of puke on the ground near the wagon.

  “There’s nothing Doc can do for my condition. We both know that. Not until the end anyway. Now let’s drop it.” Her lips had smartly thinned into a straight line of annoyance.

  Drop it! How could he? She and the kids were everything to him. He couldn’t believe her nonchalant attitude. What the devil had gotten into her? “What if this is more than just the typical sickness that goes with pregnancy?” he said with profound irritation.

  “This ain’t the time, husband.” She glanced over at Nathanial, who had the team unhitched, leading them toward the stream well within earshot. Her eyes welled. There was fear in them. “I don’t want him running off again like he did when I was carrying Elizabeth.” Kate squeezed their daughter tighter.

  “I don’t think he will. He’s got a helluva jealous streak, but things are different now. Our family is more settled, and he knows his place.” Nolan had confidence.

  Nathanial was a Crosson through and through. The boy rarely brought up his old life and those who’d been part of it. All he ever talked about was following in Nolan’s footsteps and becoming sheriff. In part, that might have been so he could boss Jesse. Though, Nate couldn’t have been any more of a shadow had he actually grown from Nolan’s seed.

  “Later, husband. Please. Let me rest.” Her voice softened. She began to lay her head down, red strands of hair falling out of the loose bun on top, Elizabeth still drawn in her arms. Their daughter had stopped crying and was now half asleep.

  “We need to talk about this now. I’m scared we might lose the baby,” he blurted out. A proud father he was, and they both wanted more children.

  Kate snapped into a sitting position, her gaze on Nathanial, whose head reared up from where he was squatted picketing the team on a thick patch of grass. His eyes widened, a fresh shimmer of insecurity showing. How could Nolan have been so clumsy with his words? It wasn’t often, but their son did need reminding from time to time of how their feelings for him were no different just because he was adopted and Elizabeth wasn’t. He’d been raised without care until they had filed the legal papers and claimed him. Before then, he’d never known a gentle touch or kind word. Beaten on, neglected—those were the harsh affections his outlaw father and others had shown the boy.

  When Kate was carrying Elizabeth, Nate had gotten so scared that they wouldn’t want him, would give up loving him, he had run off three hundred miles to Buttonwood and gotten himself in some serious trouble. Their love for him didn’t need reinforcing as often as when Nathanial had first come to live with them. Things had gotten much better, but that frailness was still an issue now and then. Lots of time had passed since then, and Nate had the reassurance of experience. Nothing had changed after Elizabeth had come.

  From what Nolan could see, Nate was in shock, slowly, stiffly standing, but Nolan still didn’t believe he’d run away. He’d maybe be upset for a short spell.

  Nate began to step away from Nolan and Kate. It was clear by his panicked expression that he didn’t want to hear that he was getting a little brother or sister. In particular, a brother. Nate wasn’t good at sharing his time with his father, not that Nolan didn’t spend time with Elizabeth. However, his time with her and Nate was spent differently. Nate was often called “Little Nolan” by lots of folks in Gray Rock, and he made no qualms about telling anyone and everyone just that, how much he wanted to be like his father.

  “Sweetheart …” Kate’s voice was soft and filled with concern.

  Nate scooted farther away, two or three more feet, separating himself from them.

  Those bastards—the men who had long ago been part of Nate’s life, the scumbags that hit him, treating him worse than a dog—infuriated Nolan anytime the ugliness of Nate’s insecurities reared up. Kate looked heartbroken as her little boy scurried backward another foot or two. It was a remnant of the mess caused by those men. The couple was used to dealing with it, accepted it was an outcome of Nate’s past, but neither of them liked it. They loved their son enough not to let anger about the boy’s past show on their faces.

  Nolan took a step toward his son. It was all it took. Nathanial spun on his heel, except Nolan was faster and caught hold of his arm, not letting the pup squirm away.

  “Nathanial, settle yourself.” It was said firmly, but not an uncaring warning.

  The child held still, his head down, staring at the ground around his feet. Nolan lifted his chin. Nate’s little face wrinkled up mean as though the news of the baby was meant to upset him.

  “Just ‘cause your mama’s gonna have a baby doesn’t change anything.” Nolan pulled him in close, hands
on Nate’s shoulders so they were face to face. “You should be happy. If it’s a boy, you can teach him to ride a horse as good as you.” It was a fact that Nolan was proud of. Nathanial could ride a horse as good, maybe better than most men. Though, he liked to jump the corral fence on the mustang, which did nothing but irk Nolan. He didn’t want to see him get hurt and whipped him more often than not for doing that.

  Nate’s muscles relaxed a mite under Nolan’s grasp. “You sure?” What the boy was really asking was would they give up being his pa and ma because he hadn’t been born to them.

  Nolan saw Nate as his blood, always had since the day Nate had taken the Crosson name—actually before. Nothing would ever change that.

  “You’re my son. I’d never give ya up, ever, not to anyone.” Nolan winked. “I think ya already know that.”

  Nathanial nodded, grinning from ear to ear, then looked at his ma for the same reassurance. What they saw was a big, loving smile, teary eyes, and arms stretched wide. Nate threw himself into her embrace, and they held one another.

  Nolan made lunch while Nate played with Elizabeth at the creek and Kate rested. Her nausea had passed, but she complained of being so tired. With their stomachs full, except Kate’s, Nolan loaded everyone into the wagon.

  “Pa?” Nate sweetly turned his face up, batting his long lashes.

  “Don’t say a word about goin’ to Birch Creek.” Nolan warned.

  The boy threw himself back on the seat.

  Kate reached around him and touched Nolan’s arm. “Husband, why don’t we go? I’m feeling much better. I shouldn’t have eaten those eggs at breakfast. Cooking them, just the smell alone, turned my stomach.” She grinned. “There’s a doctor in Birch Creek. I’ll go see him as soon as we arrive.” Kate was as bad as Nathanial, both of them giving him sad eyes. She didn’t usually resort to such immature tactics, so she must not have thought she could appeal to his senses any other way, really wanting to go herself.