by Wendy Vella
Taking her hand, Max towed her to a barrel, then leapt on top. He scanned the scene.
“The elephant is free and stampeding, we must leave!”
“No, my family!” Essie ran from him and tried to make her way through the terrified people.
“Left!” Max caught her around the waist and settled her behind him. He then started plowing through people.
“Essie!”
“Thank God.” She found herself surging forward with her family seconds later.
Warwick was on Cam’s shoulders, and he held Emily’s hand. Dorrie and Essie were clinging to Dev, with Lilly before him, and Samantha was on James’s back, with Eden before him. Toby was struggling to stay abreast as adults buffeted him. Max grabbed him around the waist and hoisted him onto his shoulders. He held out a hand to Essie and she gripped it hard.
They heard screams and the wild cry of the elephant as panic urged it on.
“Right!” Max roared. Taller than her brothers, he could see over heads. “Ahead, a fence. Get to the other side!”
Her lungs screamed but she held on to Max and did not let go. A scream behind her made Essie look, and she saw a woman fall, her head hitting the ground hard. Her hesitation was brief, but that second was enough for people to crash into her.
“Essie!”
Max felt her fingers slip from his, and he turned but did not see her. His heart pounded with fear as he tried to stop. Hands pressed to his back, forcing him forward; seconds later he reached the fence.
“Can you see her, Toby?” Max lifted the boy down.
“She’s beside a woman who has fallen, follow the same line and you will find her!”
He lowered the boy over the fence. “The others are up ahead, go to them now!” Max turned back into the fray.
Christ, let her be all right.
Fear gripped him, made his skin feel tight, and his body tense. She had to be all right. People crashed into him, but he felt nothing, intent only to reach Essie. His eyes swung from left to right.
“Move, you fool!”
He ignored everyone, and it was then he saw the elephant. It had changed course and was coming their way. Still some distance away, but definitely headed directly at Max. Desperate now, he waded through people. He felt her presence, then two men parted briefly and he found her on the ground. He had her in his arms seconds later.
“Thank God!” He lifted her high, turned, and ran. “Essie, talk to me!”
Her arms were around his neck, face pressed into his chest, but she said nothing. Reaching the fence, he found her brothers and handed her to Lord Sinclair. He climbed the fence and joined them.
“To the carriages,” Cambridge roared, running ahead.
Max wanted to take Essie back into his arms; instead, he followed. They found the little Sinclairs standing outside as they approached.
“Get her inside.” Max reached the carriage door and opened it. Lord Sinclair walked in with his sister in his arms, and he wanted to follow, but the duchess entered before him. Instead he had to stand in the doorway and watch on helplessly.
“Essie, talk to us, love.” Her brother lowered her to the seat.
She was pale, and dirt ran in streaks down her cheeks. Max imagined her hands desperately dashing away her tears as she struggled to regain her feet. He wanted to growl, he wanted to roar; God, he just wanted to hold her.
“Essie, you are frightening us!” He heard the fear in the duchess’s words.
“I-I am all right.” She struggled to rise, but her brother placed a hand on her chest, holding her down.
“Easy now. Tell us where it hurts?”
“I am fine, I promise.” Her voice was weak, and she winced as she struggled against her brother’s hand. She was doing what she always did, being the strong, stoic one. The sibling who tended others. Well, to hell with that.
“No, you are bloody not!”
All eyes turned to Max.
“For once tell the truth! Tell them you are hurting, tell them how you feel.” Rage was spiraling up inside him. Anger that he could not hold her, that he had not reached her before she was hurt, and at her insistence she was well. Something seemed to have snapped inside him. So he turned his anger on her siblings.
“She believes she is inferior to you all. Do you know that?”
“Now see here, Huntington—”
“Do you know that she does what she does because she believes herself unworthy of being a Sinclair sibling?” Max continued. “She never stops. Never gives a thought to herself, because she believes each of you is so much more than she could ever be!”
Shock etched the two faces.
“Did you know that after she tends very ill patients, her hands shake and she feels the fear she would not allow herself to feel while treating them? Fear that if she had not succeeded, they would have died.”
“Stop it, Max.” Her words were not loud, but he heard each clearly. They broke through his anger, and allowed reality to return. What the hell had he just done? He had no right to speak the way he had. No rights to Essex Sinclair.
“You should have known these things about her,” he rasped before stalking away.
Finding his horse in the chaos, he rode as if the hounds of hell were on his heels, yet it was not hard or fast enough, because all he could see was Essie, lying broken and hurt as he tried to reach her.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Five days after the Bartholomew Fair, Essie rose early but did not leave her room, instead taking her breakfast on a tray. Her face was still bruised, and they marred her body, dark and angry, a reminder of what could have been.
She had never really been unwell in her life. Not seriously. She’d experienced pain, but not this type. It had been agony, and she was quite sure she had no wish to endure so much of it again at any time in her future.
Essie remembered falling, and then the feel of people stomping on her in their panic to flee. She had tried to get to her feet, but had not succeeded until Max found her. When his hands reached for her, she’d known it was him, and that she was safe. The absolute belief that he would look after her was startling, as until that moment she’d only ever felt that with her siblings. Essie remembered him holding her close, sheltering her with his body, and for those brief moments the fear had subsided.
“Lord, what a mess.” She sighed.
Her siblings had walked around her tentatively for five days, but she had read the questions in Dev’s, Eden’s, and Cam’s eyes. Max had told them things about her they had not known, and they wanted to ask her about his words. She could shake him for that. He’d had no right. Those were her thoughts to air should she wish it, not his.
Getting off the bed, Essie knew she could not stay in her room, or her brother’s house, forever, so she decided to wash and dress, and then visit with Eden. Her sister would not pepper her with questions if she asked her not to. Actually, she would, but Essie could ignore Eden. Her brothers were more determined.
Leaving her room, Essie made it down the stairs and to the front entrance.
“And where do you think you are going?”
Looking up, she saw Dev leaning over the bannister, glaring down at her.
“Out. I planned to see Eden and help her with the nursery.”
“You are not well enough.”
“I want to go, Dev.”
“I will accompany you then.”
“No, you will not.”
He started down the stairs, his long strides taking them two at a time. Seconds later he was before her. Even when she was angry with him she loved this man who had been the head of their family for so long. She could not fault him for his commitment to each of them, and they never doubted his love. Dev would lay down his life for any of his siblings.
“Do you know how much it hurts me to see you hurting?”
“I am hurting no more, Dev.”
He lifted her chin, looking at her bruises. “These hurt you, but it is the pain inside you that worries me, and th
at I didn’t see what Huntington, a stranger, did.”
“His words were not the truth, Dev.”
“Unfortunately, I fear they were.”
Lying wasn’t something Essie liked doing. Especially not to this man, when she owed him so much.
“Please, Dev. Can you not let this rest?”
“Why have you not told me how you felt? How could you believe yourself inferior to any of us, when the truth is so very different.”
She did not speak, could not speak. How did she tell the man who had been so strong all his life that she had felt weak?
“Come, let’s walk.”
Morning sun greeted them as they stepped outside and started along the street. He took her hand as he had when they were children, and swung her arm as they walked.
“I spoke with Eden and Cam last night, and we talked about you. Like me, they were shocked at Huntington’s words.”
“Dev—”
“Shocked because it is you who keeps this family strong. When you are not here, we flounder about, at a loss, Essie. You are our backbone, and it saddens me that we have never shown you how important, how special you are to us.”
They walked a few paces while Essie grappled with her brother’s words.
“I will not lie to you, Dev. I have felt inferior. You are such strong people. Vibrant and commanding, and I… well, I cannot even sit a horse.”
“Sitting a horse is easy. Taking out bullets and coming to the aid of young boys who have suffered unimaginable horrors, now that takes strength. Forgive us for not allowing you to see yourself as we always have, Essie.”
“Oh, Dev.” She hugged him right there on the street. “You and the others never made me feel that way. That was all my doing.”
“I still should have known. The problem was that you always seemed so calm and strong. We never saw the fears or insecurities.
“Come.” Dev released her, and took her hand again. “It is not bad enough that the other residents on this street think we are outrageous, we must add to their belief.”
Essie smiled for the first time since the fair. Her family thought she was strong. It was a wonderful feeling.
“Promise that you will talk with me in the future, Essie. Come to me, or one of the others, when you heal someone and are scared for what could have been. When your hands shake. Let us care for you.”
“I promise, and for the most it is wonderful, but there are times when I am scared that I cannot save or help someone.”
They walked in silence along the street, both deep in thought.
“There is something between you and Huntington, and I would like you to tell me when it started.”
And with those few words, her wonderful feeling fled.
“There is nothing between us,” she lied. “I was aware of him when he came to Oak’s Knoll, I will not deny that. He is a handsome, intriguing man, and at the time I thought him a wanderer with no possessions.”
“Well, you got that wrong.” Dev snorted. “But I know there is something between you, Essie. His behavior toward you is clear for anyone to see. Plus his concern, and the way he spoke after you were injured. That was not an uninterested man.”
“Let it alone now, Dev. Please.”
“You’re asking a great deal from me, Essie. I love you, as does Cam. We know how broken Tolly made you feel, and it hurt us all, Essie, to see you in pain.”
“I know, and I love you for it.” She patted his arm.
“Did he compromise you?”
“Dev!” She had not expected that. “How could you think that, when I have just told you there is nothing between us!”
“Well, did he?” The words were gritted out. “Because I will tear him apart if he did.”
“He had a bullet hole in his side, and I had Cam, Bertie, Josiah, and Grace to chaperone me. There is also the small matter of you believing your sister would be a trollop.”
Dear Lord, I was a trollop. But Essie would never regret that.
“I know men,” he gritted out. “They can be persuasive.”
“Were you persuasive before you married Lilly?”
“I can’t believe you just asked me that.” He shot her a harried look.
“You asked me.”
He swung her hand.
“That I did. I always forget how devilishly quick-witted you are.”
“Even after all these years, brother, how foolish of you to underestimate any of your sisters.” Essie saw the smile he was attempting to keep from his face.
“I love you, and hate that you may have been hurting and I did not know.”
“Oh, Dev, you cannot fix every hurt, but in this case there is nothing to fix, I promise you.” She felt bad lying to him, but it was for the best.
“And you are a prize, Essie. Never forget that.”
“Thank you, Dev.”
“For what?” He looked down at her.
“For being you. Fierce, loyal, and annoyingly protective. The very best big brother a sister could ever wish for.”
“You’re welcome, and I am not annoyingly protective.”
“No, you are. I can only imagine you will be worse when the twins come of age.”
He groaned loudly. “Please do not remind me of what is to come.”
They had reached Eden’s front door. Dev knocked.
“Now I’m here, I better see James. He has a map he wishes to show me. One only hopes he also has food.”
“He is a duke. Should he require food, he need only ask,” Essie assured her brother. Kissing his cheek, she left him to find his way to James, while she found her sister.
“Hello, sister dear.” Eden yawned loudly. Dressed in a loose day dress with her hair bundled on her head, she looked lovely. “I felt the baby last night.”
“Really!” Essie could not help the squeal of excitement. She hugged Eden close.
“Are you all right, Essie?”
She did not pretend to misunderstand. “Dev and I have just talked, and I feel better now, and I’m sorry you were hurt by Mr. Huntington’s words.”
“I knew some of what you were feeling, as we had that discussion in the carriage on the way to his warehouse, but not all. Forgive me for not realizing, sister.”
“There is nothing to forgive, because the problem was mine, not yours. As I told Dev, I alone created those feelings inside me.”
Eden gave her a steady look, but did not ask the questions that Essie knew she still harbored, and for that she was relieved. The morning had been trying enough already.
“Very well, but I hope in future you will come to me if you wish to discuss the matter further.”
“I will, I promise.”
“He would make you an excellent husband, sister.”
“Who?” Essie lowered her brows, trying to look confused.
Eden opened her mouth and then closed it again. She pulled out an earplug.
“Why is my husband roaring?”
“Dev is with him, are they arguing?”
“No.” Eden shook her head as she got to her feet. “I hear Mr. Spriggot’s voice.”
They ran to James’s study, and opening the door without knocking, they entered.
Essie had always loved this room. Lined with shelves that reached the ceiling, it had once been the only room in the duke’s house that had a soul. It had been here the Sinclair family had first told the duke of their heightened senses.
“Why are you yelling?”
James was standing behind his desk, and Mr. Spriggot, who was a private investigator, was seated across from him. Dev was prowling.
“Max Huntington is my brother!”
Essie felt her brother’s eyes on her as she stumbled to a seat and fell into it. This could not be happening, surely. She must be dreaming. Pinching her arm, she felt the small sting of pain. Apparently not.
“And both Essie and I saved him! God’s blood, will this bloody curse never end,” Dev roared.
“Curse?” Mr. Spriggot questioned.<
br />
“My brother is speaking of my husband’s family,” Eden added quickly. “It seems they keep popping up when we least expect them to.”
Mr. Spriggot nodded in understanding. “Yes, I understand how unsettling this must be for you all, especially considering Mr. Tolly and his relationship to the duke. After all, he was a brother, and his intentions were nefarious indeed.”
Essie forced a smile onto her face at the mention of the man she had once believed she loved. She knew better now.
“Come, Mr. Spriggot, I shall see you out.” Essie needed time to process what she had learned. Max is a Raven. How is that possible? She needed time to understand that yet another Sinclair had saved a Raven.
“No need, Miss Sinclair, I can see myself out.” After bowing, the man left. Essie sank back into a chair and tried to grapple with what she had just learned.
“How wonderful for you, darling.” Eden went around the desk to stand beside her husband. She wrapped an arm around his waist and held him. “And he is living so close, what could be better than that. You shall have plenty of time to become better acquainted.”
For two heartbeats no one spoke, everyone tense and waiting, and then the duke let out a bark of laughter. He stepped away from the desk and pulled his wife into his arms, holding her close. “God, woman, I love you.”
“I can’t believe we saved yet another Raven.” Dev sighed; his anger had slipped away. “Huntington, of all people.” He shot Essie another look.
“Imagine how I feel about that fact,” the duke rasped.
James had been through so much. The betrayal of his father, finding his sisters, and coming to the realization of just the man his father was. Now it seemed there was to be another chapter written to his life.
Max is a Raven. Dear Lord, is it really possible?
“I should have known something was off with him,” James said. “From the start he unsettled me... us.”
“We must tell him, my love. You both deserve this,” Eden said.
“I know. But I’m not sure he will be happy about the fact. Or that he now has another brother, and two sisters.”
Essie staggered to her feet. It was almost too much to take in. Max was to be in her life now, no matter how much she wished differently. She would have to return to Oak’s Knoll. Being forced to face him constantly was more than she could bear.