“And… I know why the council didn’t want Kenyon to marry Jaisey’s mom,” he said.
Quinn smiled. Seff must have some really good information if he was going to taunt Quinn with it, so he took the bait, “Really, why?”
“This is going to sound crazy, but hear me out. Apparently, in our histories, the ones the elders don’t tell us about, the Shroud weren’t evil to start, but they turned evil. Apparently if a shifter and a human with the rarest blood type – like Jaisey’s mom – have children, those children could be bitten and become Shroud. That’s what happened back then and that’s what turned the Shroud evil back then. The elders were just trying to keep Kenyon from creating offspring that could be turned into Shroud.”
Quinn just stared at Seff. The Shroud no longer existed, so why would that matter? He opened his mouth to question it, but Seff held up his hand to stop him.
“There’s more Quinn. Before the power was sealed up in our valley, the Ishaks’ blood is what saved the Shroud from dying. Regular human blood isn’t enough for the Shroud, so they’ll die without that blood. They need power saturated blood to save them.
“When we sealed away the power, the Ishaks couldn’t feed them anymore. So, the original Shroud all died off. That means the Ishaks don’t have their long lives anymore either. The elders think they are trying to create the Shroud again. And Kenyon thinks they already have one and that it was in the forest the day I was attacked.
“Remember how I said something felt wrong and the elders said they couldn’t see – like something was blocking them. They think the Shroud was in the forest right then. The big thing is, if there is one now, it’ll have to feed on the blood of a shifter that’s been under the power of the valley – one of us. And he thinks that’s why they kept trying to attack me. They just need to feed the thing, so it won’t die. It must seem easier for them to go after one of the younger ones.”
“Seff…” Quinn started to speak, but Seff cut him off.
“Wait… I’m not done,” Seff demanded. “So, Jaisey and her siblings have this potential to become Shroud, but Kenyon thinks that once they have shifted the first time, their blood will be changed, so he wants Jaisey to stay and shift. He wants to be the one to tell her all about this though.”
There was a triumphant smile on the boy’s lips.
Quinn sat there for a few moments, trying to process everything the boy had just said. It was convoluted, and well, very hard to believe.
“Oh yeah, and the best thing,” he paused dramatically, “is that she’s your soulmate.”
“Wait... what?” Quinn asked, shocked. He didn’t even know what else to say.
“Really, Quinn. He says that sometimes it happens, that our souls shift to someone else’s and they’re our soulmate. And he said to tell you to quit avoiding her because she’s yours,” Seff explained.
Quinn was about to argue again but then Seff yawned widely. Quinn noticed the dark circles under the boy’s eyes. “Did you get any sleep last night?” Quinn asked.
Seff gave him an exasperated look, “No, I was up all night talking to Kenyon. He has a nice little place up west of the bluff. And yes, I went alone, and I was fine. Kenyon ran home with me this morning. And no, I won’t go wandering off on my own again. He already got after me for that.”
“Stretch out and get some sleep,” Quinn told him with a shake of his head. The kid was really something else.
“Are you going to go to Jaisey now?” he asked through another yawn.
“Let me figure some things out first, all right?” he responded.
“Fine, don’t believe me. But it’s all true,” he said, his body slowly sinking into a horizontal position.
“Sure it is,” he replied quietly.
He rose and headed to the door. He would go talk to the Healer. If anyone would tell him the truth, it would be Aatu. He couldn’t think of any reason why Kenyon would want to tell such tall tales to Seff. Maybe the seclusion over the years had gotten to him.
But he didn’t make it any further than his own front porch. Kenyon was leaning against his porch railing, waiting.
“Yes,” he said matter-of-factly, though Quinn had asked no question.
“Yes, what?” Quinn asked with his eyebrows raised.
“Yes, everything the boy said is true. I’m his uncle. Jaisey is my daughter. I believe that there’s a Shroud out there and they need one of us to feed on. Yes, the Ishaks were once what kept the Shroud alive. Yes, I was told not to marry Lydia because of her rare blood type, and that our offspring could potentially become a Shroud. And yes,” he said, with a grin before continuing on, “Jaisey is your soulmate.”
Quinn fell into a chair opposite Kenyon.
“I know it’s a lot Quinn,” Kenyon said softly. “And I do believe she should stay.”
The confusion must have been clear in Quinn’s eyes. He was unable to process anything beyond the word soulmate. That implied they were meant for each other. Equally. Did she feel the same? Would it be strong enough to keep her on the mountain? It was too much to hope that Kenyon was right; it was everything that he wanted.
Kenyon turned to leave, but paused and turned back.
“I want you to know Quinn, I couldn’t have picked a better match for her myself. I believe you were always meant for her. When she’s ready, bring her up to me to talk,” he said. And with that, he headed into the forest.
Quinn didn’t know how long he sat on the porch but when he noticed the sun was high in the sky, he decided to go to Aatu. He needed more information and he really needed some comfort. His mind was flashing with so many images he couldn’t reconcile them.
He found Aatu in his garden, weeding. There appeared to be a lull in the storm, and the fresh rain-washed smells of the forest helped to calm him.
“I wondered how long it would take you before you came,” the old man said, not looking up from his task.
Quinn shook his head. Once again, the old man was a step ahead of him.
“Is it all true then?” he asked.
“Yes,” Aatu said simply.
“Do you believe there is a Shroud on our mountain?” he asked quietly.
The old man turned to him, paused, and then responded, “I believe so, yes.”
“And Jaisey could become one of them?” Quinn asked. He didn’t want to believe that was even a possibility.
“We have no proof of that. But based on information we do have, we believe that perhaps one like Jaisey could be turned, should the venom be introduced into her system,” he replied. “The thing is Quinn, we truly cannot know for sure. That is why the council didn’t want to take chances.”
“Will it protect her to have her shift?” he asked apprehensively.
“Kenyon thinks so. But again, we’ve nothing in our histories to verify one way or the other,” he said.
Quinn sighed. The very thought of someone changing her into… he stopped the thought. It didn’t matter; he would make sure she was safe.
The old man continued, “I’m inclined to believe it as well though. Our blood does become different after we make our first shift.”
“Do you believe in soulmates grandfather?” he asked.
“You might as well ask do I believe in the sky or the wind. To ask if something is real, you imply that there might be something mystical about such a thing. There is no mystery in love, Quinn. It simply is,” he replied.
Quinn had to smile. He never did get very straight answers from the man, yet somehow, he had clearly answered.
“What do I do?” he finally asked, feeling the weight of it all.
“About what?” the old man responded, his eyebrows lifted.
Quinn sighed, about what indeed.
“All of it!”
“Quinn,” he responded patiently, “the key to living is not to worry about what you will do about ‘all of it.’ Rather, do what you can when you have your answers about each part.”
Quinn thought about that. He was right. Again.
There was nothing he could do just yet about the possibility of a Shroud since they weren’t even sure that one had been made. There was nothing he could do about the Ishaks, at least until they came onto their mountain again.
There was, however, something he could do about Jaisey. He had a soulmate. He knew what he needed to do, and that sent butterflies through his stomach. He laughed out loud at that, receiving an odd look from Aatu.
“I find myself more nervous facing a soulmate than an ancient enemy,” he replied.
Aatu chuckled as well, his eyes crinkling with humor, and then he turned and went back to his gardening.
Quinn found he was very tired as he headed back to his house. He’d not slept the previous night. Seff was sound asleep on his couch, so he headed to his own bed.
He would find a time and place to share his feelings for Jaisey. Soon.
Twenty-one
Jaisey
Jaisey woke early to the sound of pouring rain. It was thrumming on the roof and rushing through the gutters. It was calming in an odd way and she was thankful she could stay put for the day. She really didn’t want to chance running into her father again.
Her father.
She didn’t understand how he was alive and on the mountain. His actions had been so confusing. He had seemed angry to see her there, but really, she was the one that had a right to be angry. Then he’d made everyone look at her, as though her being in their midst was some bad thing.
The truly frustrating part was that none of it made sense. He had been an amazing father and had loved their mother so much. What could have changed so much to make him leave them?
And then there was Quinn.
She sighed deeply, sorting through the feelings from the previous evening. She didn’t really know what to think about him. He’d seemed as caught up in her as she was in him, but then he would distance himself from her. It was so frustrating not knowing for sure if he felt anything for her. She’d never felt anything like this for anyone before. Everything about him was perfect for her. Their hands even fit together perfectly. She smiled, warmed by the remembered sensation.
His eyes were grey, and they had so much depth and such life. She’d met them across the fire at one point during the night before she knew who he was. She’d felt as though she’d seen clear to his soul, staring in his eyes across that fire. It had also seemed as though he had been looking right into hers. But now, in the light of the day, she felt foolish. Had there been such a deep connection between them, or had she imagined it in her charged emotional state?
She was usually brave enough to get answers to her tough questions, but this one stopped her in her tracks. She knew she wouldn’t get up the nerve to head down to the village. As much as she wanted to see him; ached to see him – the fear of rejection was overwhelming.
Of course, she was able to use her father as an excuse for not visiting. But really, he meant less to her than her friends. It sounded harsh, but after ten years, he was more of an idea, rather than a real character in her life. His choice, apparently.
She thought about the way she had left Seff sitting by the fire, stunned. For that, she did feel guilty. She had feared that they all knew about her father and had kept it from her.
As it turned out, at least according to Quinn, they hadn’t. She owed Seff a huge apology for thinking he had been part of the deception. That made her decision to stay at the cabin for the day a little harder.
Several of the boys showed up mid-morning – without Seff. She hoped it wasn’t because he was upset with her. The weather had cleared, and the sun was shining by then. They were all awkward around her, but thankfully, no one mentioned her father.
She heard Quinn’s name several times, and try as she might, she could not stop the thoughts and swirling emotions in response. She had almost leaned in and kissed him before he left. She was grateful that she hadn’t been so bold, especially if he hadn’t felt the same for her. But, a part of her wondered what his lips would have felt like pressed against hers.
As they were leaving, Jei mentioned that they were having another bonfire at dark. They all begged until she agreed to come. It scared her to think about putting herself back in their midst, but not for the reasons they would think.
She couldn’t even think about the coming bonfire for the rest of the afternoon. When she did, her stomach twisted into knots, and butterflies took flight. It was too much. She tried to occupy her mind with menial tasks until it was time to go. It didn’t work, even a little bit.
Her mind kept wandering down the hill, into the valley. She could picture the porch and the face that belonged on it now; the welcoming smile, the warm hand that had enveloped her own, the dark hair which he wore just past the neckline, the muscled arms, and chest that had felt so strong embracing her. The beautiful grey eyes, staring back into hers. The strong jaw and the perfectly shaped lips.
“Oh, stop it,” she scolded herself, trying to chase away the thoughts.
But the visions persisted and when she found herself imagining once again what those perfect lips would feel like pressed to her own, she realized she had let this go too far.
Her emotions were wildly out of control. She slammed a lid on them and tried to be more logical. She had imagined herself in love with a man she’d spoken to for a single evening. People did not fall in love that fast. It was ridiculous, and she knew it.
Then the realization came to her – maybe she was just trying to come up with reasons to stay on the mountain. She loved the feeling of family in the village.
But this isn’t my family, she thought glumly. I really don’t belong here.
It had been an emotional, crazy summer and it was time to go. She realized that was the only solution at this point. She had done what she had come to do. The diversion of Seff and his friends had helped to occupy her, but her healing had taken place on the bluff. It was time to go. She needed to stop trying to make the little village into something it wasn’t.
She felt a sense of release in the decision. She’d wanted to give herself time to figure out what to do next, but now that didn’t seem so important. No, now she just needed to remove herself from the lives of these people, before her dependence grew too great to leave. Hopefully, it hadn’t already.
She knew she would miss Seff unbelievably, but maybe he could visit her sometime. Her mind made up, she headed out to the last bonfire she would have with her friends. She knew it would break her heart to leave, but it was the right thing to do.
When she reached the village, her intentions were only solidified. Everyone seemed unsure how to act around her. It wasn’t the comfortable place it had been only the night before. She sighed, feeling gloomy and resigned herself to her plan.
The boys seemed genuinely happy to see her, but it was like they didn’t know how to talk to her anymore. Seff wasn’t there and she worried even more that he was upset with her. And try as she might, she couldn’t stop herself from searching for Quinn, but he wasn’t there either.
Her heart felt as though it was breaking. Realizing she was losing the family she had gained over the summer; a whole new form of grief overtook her. It was too much.
She said a hasty goodnight to the boys, saying she wasn’t feeling well. And once again, she found herself running away from the village. She didn’t lose her way through her tears this time; she had Yellow Jeep to return her safely to the cabin. She knew exactly what she needed to do. It was time to pack up; time to leave.
She reached the cabin and stumbled inside – her tears seemed never-ending. Poor Jack didn’t know what to do with her. He curled up next to her and rested his head on her lap. She sat there scratching behind his ears until she got her emotions under control. She was exhausted – more emotionally than anything. With a last look around the cabin, she headed to bed, figuring she’d get an early start the next day on packing up.
* * *
She was even more exhausted in the morning. Her dreams had been fitful; she hadn’t slept we
ll as a result. Her heart still felt as if it were breaking.
She tried not to think of leaving the mountain in terms of losing something. But, after all she had been through, she wasn’t sure she would ever be able to return. She was losing so much – her new family, her mountain, her magic.
She almost wished that she had never come, but knew in her heart that wasn’t true. She had found her peace. It was unfortunate she would have to leave the place that had restored it. In her heart, it felt wrong to be leaving, but she didn’t see any other choice. She’d become too comfortable with her life on the mountain, but this couldn’t be her life forever.
She heard a quiet knock on the door a short time later and reluctantly answered it – not wanting the emotions to start flowing again.
Seff was standing on her doorstep, looking sheepish, his hands shoved into his pockets.
“Are you all right?” he asked immediately.
She nodded and then asked right back, “You?”
He also nodded, “I missed you at the fire last night. The guys said you came, but you took off a few minutes before I got there.”
“I just had to go,” she said quietly.
His eyes tightened as he glanced past her. He could see the boxes she was packing.
“Are you leaving?” he asked quietly.
“Yeah, it’s time” she replied, trying to keep the sadness from creeping back into her voice.
“Why now?” he demanded.
“Oh Seff, this was always the plan from the beginning. I can’t live up here forever and I can’t keep pretending that I belong here,” she said. There was so much more she wanted to say, but she couldn’t find the words.
“You could stay if you wanted. You belong here more than you know,” he replied.
The tears began to well up in her eyes. This was harder than she had anticipated. She didn’t want to leave any more than he wanted to let her go.
“Aw, don’t cry Jaisey. Come on, at least come say goodbye to the guys and Aatu,” he said, pulling her into a hug.
Shift (Castlerock Shifters Book 1) Page 17