My heart jumped into my throat. It felt as if it were stuck there. He had never said he loved me so directly before. I should have been happy but I was not. My only thought was, but I belong with Teller.
He leaned his head forward as if to kiss me.
I put my forehead on his chest to avoid the kiss.
“You should not love me,” I whispered.
“I know. Sometimes I wish I didn’t.”
Chapter 72 India 1262 A.D
I had to get some distance from Elijah. This journey had been too much already. It drew us too close — not to mention Riddick. He was getting too close as well. Yes, some distance would be good. I couldn’t keep hurting Elijah like this and I couldn’t give myself to him.
“I will go back to London for a while when we return,” I said.
“Very well,” Elijah’s voice was flat. “We should get back to the others.” He was not pleased but he did not argue.
Shortly after we returned to Riddick and Samuel, Shantanu beckoned for us to join them back in their cave. He was all smiles.
“That did not take long,” Elijah said.
“My men showed great bravery. We agree that the right thing to do is defend humans as best we can from our kind. It is the least we can do for them. We are at your service, My Lord.” Shantanu bowed, then took Elijah’s forearm.
“Excellent choice. In return the Court is also at your service.” Elijah shook his forearm. It was a gesture that was as good as any written contract — maybe even better.
After our customary brief rest, Elijah when straight into his often-repeated teachings on how to feed without killing. Most of the vampires in this coven were skeptical.
As the sun sank in the sky, Kailash as well as three others headed out with Elijah and me to the neighboring city to begin feeding lessons. The rest of the coven chose to stay with Riddick and Samuel for beginner defensive training. Shantanu remained behind to act as a translator.
The city was larger than the one near their cave. We hid in the shadows for quite some time and could not find anyone alone.
“It is our culture,” Kailash explained. “We rarely venture out alone, especially women. As you can imagine, this makes feeding more difficult.”
“Yes, I see,” Elijah frowned.
The plan was for Elijah to show them how he could stop feeding before the human heart stopped. I spotted a couple leaving a home. I looked at Elijah. “Together?”
He nodded and in a flash we were behind the couple. Elijah sank his teeth into the man and I the woman. I had fed recently, so I did not take as much blood from the woman as he did from the man. As soon as she went limp in my arms, I released her, even though her heartbeat was still strong. I did this so she would be unconscious and would not see us.
Elijah fed a moment longer. He laid the man down gently beside the woman. The others had formed a half circle around us.
“Listen. You can hear their heartbeats,” Elijah said. “They will awaken soon. They will be weak, of course but in a couple of days they will be right as rain. With practice and regular feeding you can do it as well.”
They were wide-eyes and speechless.
Elijah continued. “Let us leave at once to find someone for one of you to practice on. Vallachia and I will pull you off. This way, after we are gone, you will know what to do and you can all practice until you are able to control yourselves.”
“It is true; they did it!” Kailash breathed heavy with excitement. Her brow furrowed. “What does this ‘right as rain’ mean?”
The next day was spent in the cave. Some of the men trained with Riddick. Lavanya and her great-aunt taught me to play their favorite games. When the sun was setting, I was reluctant to leave. I liked this coven. The members were affable and their way of life was wonderfully different. From the sky, I turned back one last time to wave goodbye.
“Thank God we are out of there,” Riddick said.
“Yes, I can’t wait to be home,” Samuel agreed.
This was not at all how I felt.
When we arrived back at Lord Chastellain’s Great Hall, the lord’s shoulders dropped in relief when he saw us. “I was beginning to worry.” Then it was straight to business. “What news do you bring?”
“Thanks to Lady Vallachia, it was a monumental success.” Elijah wore a proud smile.
The lord’s grey eyes widened as they turned to me.
“Honestly, My Lord, I did not do anything. They were extraordinarily gracious and they pledged their fealty to the Court.”
Lord Chastellain looked to his son for confirmation.
“Don’t be so modest, Vallachia. Father, she had them under her spell from the beginning.”
“He is exaggerating, My Lord. They simply liked my hair.”
The lord laughed. “Your hair?”
I don’t recall ever hearing him laugh and I could not help smiling. “Apparently, most of them had never seen blond hair before,” I answered.
“We may have to send you on diplomatic missions more often,” the lord said.
“I am at the service of the Court, My Lord. However, I plan to return to London.”
The lord glanced to Elijah, whose jaw was clenched. “Very well, we will call you to service when you are needed.”
With a bow Samuel and I exited. We both wanted to find Mari. Of course, she was alive and well. I briefly told her goodbye so she and Samuel could be alone. I found Riddick waiting for me outside my room. Oh no. I frowned.
“Don’t worry. I’m here because Elijah sent me. He has to attend a meeting. He asked me to tell you that he is rather busy. He hopes to be free by dusk so that we can escort you back to London.”
“Thank you.” I stepped into my room.
“You know, it makes sense.”
I paused and tilted my head at Riddick.
“What Elijah told Shantanu’s coven. I never looked at it from another perspective. I had always been told that the Court wants to suppress vampires. Yet I never truly felt suppressed so it did not matter to me who was in power and I had never thought much about what would happen if we did rule over humans. … We would ruin everything, wouldn’t we?”
I gave him a playful smile. “Don’t tell me you are actually becoming one of us.”
Riddick was deep in thought, as if he were struggling with himself.
“Look, the world is not black and white. Good and bad are not always clear. There is only gray.” Surely my words did not help to clarify his beliefs.
“Well either way, I’m glad I’m here,” Riddick said.
“I’m glad you’re here, too.” With that, I disappeared into my room and shut the door. I wanted to make it clear that that was where it ended. We were only friends. Why didn’t I do that with Elijah? I pushed this annoying thought out of my head and packed a couple of belongings for my return to London.
Part IV Chapter 73 Ludus 1284 A.D
I did not think that being friends with Elijah would be possible but thankfully it was. We grew more distant physically but closer otherwise. We laughed and joked with each other as equals and friends. He stayed in London whenever possible and when he was called to Denmark, I would usually return with him. This allowed me to see Mari and my other friends often. We fell into this pattern of companionship, which soon felt natural.
It took Mary almost a year before she befriended me again, despite my attempts to talk to her and include her. Finally, she came around. It was about this time that I noticed she and Elizabeth had grown closer. I wondered if they would be lovers someday. Maybe they already were; who knew? I was not one to pry, as it was none of my concern. If they were a couple, they would tell me in their own time.
As the years passed I was sent on several diplomatic missions for the Court. With the success of these missions, the Elders appointed me their lead emissary. I enjoyed traveling and meeting new people and vampires. Some covens were more forthcoming, while others more reluctant but Elijah and I were usually able to win them over in the end.
Riddick unofficially appointed himself my personal bodyguard. He and Samuel always accompanied Elijah and me on our missions. Sometimes Mary was recruited to accompany us when we visited new covens, as she was one of our best fighters. She became the head of military training for Lord Alexandru’s coven. Riddick, of course, became the head of military operations in Denmark. Riddick, Samuel and Mary were our “strong arms.” Luckily, they were not needed very often on our usually peaceful errands. But Lord Chastellain was careful to make sure his son was well guarded.
We came across one particularly unfriendly coven while in Rus. The members were suspicious of us from the beginning. They appeared not to know much about the growing vampire trouble in Europe. There were only eight of them. Apparently, they thought that number was enough to overtake us. The leader thought we were there to take over his territory. This was about as much as we could gather, as they did not allow for much talk. In the end, we annihilated all of them. This was by far our least successful mission. I had to admit that killing the entire coven was not upsetting, as we saved many human lives.
India was as far as we traveled to the east. The farthest south that we ventured was Egypt. This spanned a good portion of the known world. A relatively large coven of vampires in Alexandria decided that they wanted nothing to do with our conflict in the North. They agreed to stay neutral. Two of the vampires from that coven returned with us to learn how to feed without killing. Egypt was hot and the sun too intense. We were more than grateful to leave for home.
My eyes and ears were always alert for any sign of Teller but no one seemed to have heard of him. Throughout my travels, I’d hoped we would find him. The world of vampires was much smaller than that of humans. Yet we never found any sign of him.
I visited Ludus at least once a year. Usually, I did not disrupt my brother’s life. Instead, I observed him and his growing family from the shadows. I wrote to him often. Yet I had to watch over them as much as I could to make sure they were doing well. Little Vallachia grew quickly and soon she had a baby sister. They were healthy and beautiful. As it would end up Josiah had seven children altogether. One child died of a mysterious fever. His four lovely girls and two strong boys grew to be healthy adults. Not surprisingly, Josiah’s oldest boy was named Adam.
At my request, the Chastellains had a new church built in Ludus. I wanted a simple replacement for the small run-down church where my brother ministered. Chastellain would not have it. The new church was the largest, most exotic building in town. It was much too grand and not at all what I thought a place of worship should be. In the narthex was a bust of Father; it was placed on a shelf in a recess in the wall. The building was also dedicated to Father. He would not have wanted any of this.
I watched from a distance as little Vallachia became best friends with Teller’s youngest brother. The two young neighbors played together. They climbed trees and swam together; they shared all the activities that Teller and I had enjoyed at that age. As the years passed, they fell in love. Though he was five years older than she, he waited until she was of age before asking Josiah for her hand. My brother agreed to the engagement when she was sixteen.
From the shadows high up in a tree, I watched as my brother walked little Vallachia to the pergola and conducted the service. I tried to hold back the tears throughout the ceremony. When it was over, my tears fell on Elijah’s shoulder; I was not entirely sure why. My thoughts had been about Teller. His little brother was a striking resemblance.
Perhaps since Teller and I were not able to be together, somehow this new couple was taking our place. Teller and I had been destined for each other at one time and since that had not come to fruition, this beautiful young couple would carry on the lineage that we could not.
Elijah said nothing. He was simply at my side, as always. He was the most wonderfully supportive person. I was exceptionally lucky to have his friendship.
Many years later our entourage was headed back to Denmark after a mission. As we flew over the Carpathian Alps, I broke off from the drove. They followed. I wanted to pay a quick homage to my father.
“So this is where you were raised?” Mary eyed the simple houses with disapproval, clearly unimpressed.
We entered the grand church.
“This was your father?” Riddick studied the bust.
“Yes. Lord Chastellain insisted on all this but it is excessive,” I said.
Elijah turned his head to the front doors of the church. “Someone is coming.”
I ran to one of the windows and saw my brother on the front steps. “It is Josiah. Should we leave through a side door?”
“Why don’t we say hello?” Elijah said.
This was much to my surprise. My brother was almost forty. He had not seen me in over a decade. It would be painfully obvious that I was not aging.
Josiah was startled to see five heavily armed people in his church.
“Hello, Josiah,” I said.
Chapter 74 Ludus 1284 A.D
It took Josiah a moment to get his bearings. We embraced. “My big sister. I can’t believe it!” His eyes were full of questions. “You look exactly as you did the last time I saw you. How can that be?”
“It is better not to know, trust me.” I reassured him with a smile.
Elijah stepped forward and shook Josiah’s hand in greeting. “It is wonderful to see you again, Deacon.”
Elijah had not shown himself to Josiah since 1260, when Elijah and his father had lived in Ludus, pretending to be humans.
Josiah did not recognize him at first. “Aren’t you the young lord?”
“Elijah.”
“That’s right.” He looked between Elijah and me for a moment, putting the pieces of my mysterious life together. “So you have been living in Denmark all this time?”
“Partially. I travel between London and Denmark quite often,” I said.
His mouth fell open. “You have been as far as London?”
Josiah was still very handsome; his graying hair made him look like the distinguished gentleman that he was.
“Let me introduce you to my companions. You remember Samuel? He is Mari’s husband.”
“Greetings, Deacon. It is a pleasure to see you again.” Samuel shook Josiah’s hand.
“Mari, yes, how is she?” my brother asked.
“She is faring wonderfully. She does not like to travel much. Actually, it is difficult to get her out of the castle.”
“Castle?” My brother shook his head in disbelief. This was a lot to comprehend.
“This is Riddick.” Riddick took my brother’s hand and my brother flinched in pain.
“Easy!” I whispered, giving Riddick a hard look.
“Sorry,” Riddick said under his breath. He quickly loosened his grip on my brother’s hand.
“And this is Mary,” I continued.
Josiah gaped at her short hair.
“It is a pleasure to meet the family of our Lady Vallachia.” Mary bowed her head.
Josiah studied us for a moment. He seemed not to know where to start with all his questions. “Why dress as if you were going to war?”
“Don’t ask too many questions that we cannot answer, little brother. The question is, what are you doing up so early?”
“I come here early to prepare the orations. It is the best time. It is quiet and I can be alone.”
“Then we won’t keep you. We should be off,” I said.
“But you have only just arrived. Sarah and your nieces and nephews will want to see you.”
“We don’t belong here.” I gestured to my companions. “I’m sorry. It is for the best if you do not tell anyone about our visit — just reassure Mari’s mother that she is safe and well.”
He nodded and I gave him another hug.
“I’m glad to see you look happier,” he whispered.
“Take good care of that wonderful family of yours,” Elijah said.
“And you take good care of my only sister,” Josiah said.
<
br /> “Always,” Elijah replied. They eyed each other with understanding, though I’m not sure I fully understood.
My companions headed for the side door. I took my brother’s hands to get his attention.
He tried to warm my hands by rubbing them. “You are all freezing.”
“Never fear; we don’t feel cold, honestly. It is for everyone’s benefit that we live our lives away from here. So please don’t tell anyone you saw us.”
“I know. I don’t understand but I know you are doing what is best for everyone. You know I will tell Sarah. She will respect your wishes to remain away and hidden.”
I nodded. As I reached the door, I looked back. “I am sorry it has to be this way. I love you very much.”
His smile was warm and understanding. Then we were gone, like a late spring snow — swift and mysterious.
It was not long after this encounter that I received a letter from my brother. Now that he knew where I was, he could finally write. Our father had written to the lord, so it was easy for him to figure out where to send the letter. The letter was addressed:
Lady Vallachia
In the care of Lord Chastellain
Chastellain Manor
Copenhagen, Denmark
It read:
My dearest sister,
It is good to be able to write you in return. It was wonderful to see that you are doing well and I’m delighted that you are not alone. Your enigmatic and rare appearances leave me with so many questions. You never seem to want to tell me much but I must try to get answers. Did you marry the young lord? Do you have children? If so, please bring them to visit their cousins. Please tell me why you must stay away!
Your loving brother
My eye’s filled with tears. I envisioned a world where I visited my brother with my own children in tow. I pictured them playing merrily with my nieces and nephews. In my mind’s eye, I watched as they grew up together. It was almost more than I could bear. I still wanted that life more than anything. My brother deserved to know the truth. I can trust him. He will keep our secret.
Of Lords and Commoners: Book 1 (Lords and Commoners Series) Page 30