by Brenda Ford
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Tami
“Oh, Brad,” I murmur as his hands run over my naked skin. “Wow, that feels so… so good.”
The breath flies out of my mouth, my lungs squeeze tight, I can barely hold myself together as Brad brushes his hands over my very naked hips and towards the tops of my thighs. I grab his hips, loving the heat emanating off of him. He’s like my personal hot water bottle, and I love him for it.
“Spread your legs,” he whispers, his words blowing over my exposed throat. “I want you.”
“Tell me first.” I grip onto his skin tightly, my nails piercing his skin. “Tell me what I want to hear.”
He pauses for just a second, giving me the chance to hear his heart pounding as loudly and heavily as mine. Part of that is sexual thrill, I can definitely feel that throbbing through me, but it’s also nerves. I’m excited to hear him say those three words at last, knowing that he really does mean them. Here, in this bed, there is no other reason to tell me that he loves me unless he really means it. Now I know for sure. It’s real.
“I love you,” he hisses, my chest swelling with joy the whole time. “I love you so much.”
“Oh, my God, do you mean it?” My head lolls to one side. Desire cascades through me. “Are you serious?”
“I do mean it.” He kisses me over my throat, his tongue licking me every so often. “Of course I do.”
“Well, I love you too. I have loved you ever since I first met you… oh! Wow, shit.”
The words flow away as his fingers plunge deeply in to me. He takes my breath away, sending me in to heaven with just a mere touch. He massages me, brushing against my most sensitive areas, causing me to see stars. But the physical sensations are nothing compared to the wonderful happiness in my chest at the feel of those three words. Hearing that Brad loves me is the most incredible thing in the world.
“I want to hold you,” I moan while sliding my hand down is body. “I want to feel you.”
I take him between my fingers and stroke him up and down, causing us both to groan in time with one another. He slides his thumb over my clit, brushing it over and over as I graze his tip. He shudders as I roll my hips towards him. We couldn’t be closer to having intercourse if we tried. We just need to move our fingers first. The only problem is he seems really fired up by what I’m doing to him and I love him touching me too. I don’t want him to ever stop plunging his velvety fingers in to me over and over again.
“It’s nice, isn’t it?” I gasp out desperately. “Just me and you. No more drama.”
“Just me and you,” he echoes, his tone thick with lust. “And our happy ever after.”
It’s too good to be true, which is what tells me that this is a dream, but I don’t care. It feels so real and if this is the only way that I get to be with Brad without everything else surrounding us, then so be it. I will take it happily. I garb on to him tightly and roll my hips towards him, trying to communicate how much I need him.
“Brad, I want you inside me,” I growl. “It feels like it has been a life time since I had you.”
It hasn’t of course, it only feels that way because so much has happened in between, but the way that I throb desperately for him makes it kinda painful. I need him so badly my core actually hurts. I roll him on to his back and sit astride him, smiling down at his fraught expression, filled with a deep need. I love seeing him all wound up like that, needing me too. The sex goddess he unlocks in me unleashes wildly, excitedly.
I lean down and kiss him softly, my lips brushing off of his mouth and down over his throat. The excitable sounds coming out of his mouth cause me to continue traveling ever so slowly. I kiss his collar bone, his nipple, his stomach, all the way towards his thick steel rod. My mouth salivates. I want to take him deeply inside.
“Oh shit,” he groans as I push him between my lips. “Oh fuck, your mouth feels so good.”
In my dream, it’s easier to slide him further down my throat than before. I can take him all the way in, right down to his balls much simpler than before. I cup his balls in my hands and I stroke them as I suck him hard and fast, twirling my tongue around him faster and faster. I can tell by the way that his body tenses up, I’m pushing him close to the edge and I love it. I pick up the pace, moving faster and with more passion until he shudders to a stop and explodes between my lips. I have tasted him a little before, so I know how sweet and salty this is, but it’s more intense and powerful this time around. He flows down my throat, filling me up, tasting wonderful as he does. I tilt my eyes up at him, smiling as I spot that glorious beautiful expression on his face.
“Come here, you,” he moans as he leans down to grab me. “I want you.”
I almost question this. Surely, he isn’t ready to go after he just soaked my throat with his seed, but then I recall this is my dream and anything can happen, so I sidle upwards and I angle myself above him so he can tease my entrance. His tip tickles me, begging for entry, but I wait for a second before I slide all the way down. I just want to remain in this glorious moment of anticipation first. It feels so good; I never want it to end.
“Fuck me,” Brad begs me desperately. “I need you, the love of my life.”
“How can I resist that?” I cry out as I give him what he wants, what we both want, and I slide down on to him. “Fucking hell, Brad, you feel so good. You feel so… so…”
God, when he’s fucking me like this, making me feel everything, it’s hard to recall why I don’t know if me and him could work. What the hell I am worrying about. When it feels like this, what else could I need? Screw the rest of the world and their opinions… why not just have this forever more?
“Oh my God.” His finger caresses my clit as I thrust harder and faster. “Oh, fuck, Brad.”
I dig my nails deeply in to him as I ride him, the pleasure creeping its way through me as we move in harmony. Our bodies fit together so well, it’s utterly perfect, I love it. As the hot bliss screams and grows within me, I give myself over to it wholly. I feel care free and excitable, happier and full of thrill. This moment is all that I have ever wanted and more. This is how love is supposed to be, this is what our relationship should be like, not filled with constant drama and stress. Me and him could be happy if we were allowed…
Bang!
“What the hell?” I bolt upright in bed, the dream fading away as a sound disturbs me. “What was that?”
Bang! Bang!
My heart races. I leap out of bed like I have been electrocuted and race over to the window. I peer through it with my pulse pounding in my throat. My stomach flip flops, sickness threatens to come spilling out, but I clap my hand to my mouth to prevent that from happening. I need to remember that I have just been through a massive trauma, so I might be over reacting to something that’s actually very normal. The bangs could have nothing to do with me. I need to gather myself up and stop acting like a paranoid freak.
God, I wish that Ruby was here. I should have let her stay. What the hell was I thinking? Why did I need to be so brave? To try and convince myself that I could survive through absolutely anything. That was stupid and full of a useless pride that I never want to succumb to today.
Bang! Bang! Bang!
Nope, that’s too close. It’s to do with me, I’m sure of it. Without even allowing myself to think for another second longer, I grab my cell phone and call the cops. I refuse to end up in the same position again. Stuck with Maria because I can’t call anyone to come and help me. They will understand anyway.
Once the phone call starts, I dive into my bed and slide under the sheets. I feel stupid once I’m there that I didn’t even think to check all the locks on my windows and doors, but there isn’t a chance of me leaving this place now. There isn’t any real safety under the covers of my bed, but it’s better than being out there, exposed.
The police will be here soon, I tell myself as I speak. It will be fine. There is no need to worry.
Bang! Bang!
“
Help!” I yelp into the phone. “Help me. Someone is here, something is happening…”
If I am paranoid, then this is a slippery slope. There is no telling where it might lead. Probably me calling the cops over everything forever. But after what I have been through, I would much rather be safe than sorry. So, I explain what is happening to me without a hint of shame. I need them, this is what they are here for, and there is no telling which direction this might head in to if I am not careful.
“It was her.” I almost collapse to the floor as soon as I hear those words. “It was Maria.”
After sitting in the same curled over position for hours just listening to chaos unleashing outside, the relief is almost sickening. I nearly collapse and puke all over the place. I feel everything all at once.
“It was Maria,” the officer tells me softly. “She had a gun. Judging from the ranting outside, she wanted to kill you because she believes that your boyfriend should be with her.” I gasp loudly, unable to hide my shock. “But don’t worry, she is locked up now and her words have pretty much tied her to being locked away for a long time.”
“Yeah?” That’s good. I’m glad to hear that, it makes me feel calmer. “She’s going away?”
“She is. This is finally over which I’m sure is good news to you.”
“It’s… I can’t even explain how good news it is. It’s… everything.”
It means that the drama is over. At least that part of it anyway. I don’t even want to think about the rest of it yet, I can’t deal with any of that. I’m just glad that Maria is gone… however, the fact that she wanted to kill me just for Brad is fucking scary. I could have actually lost my life over him. I have already seen what she can do with a knife, so I dread to think what a gun would have done to me.
This is scary as all hell. I can’t help but think about which way it could have gone.
“Thank you, officer,” I say in a small voice. “Thank you for everything that you have done.”
I just want him to go now. I want him out of my hair so I can succumb to the tears. I need to cry it all out. The relief, the joy, the sadness. All of it.
Chapter Thirty
Brad
“Please, just let me out of here!” I cry out as the nurse leaves the room yet again, forcing me to stay in here. “I’m okay now. I’m doing alright. All I want to do is go home. I’m sick of this…”
But yet again I am left here alone with no clue as to when I will be allowed to escape. It’s driving me insane. They won’t even tell me when I am allowed to even discuss getting out here never mind anything else.
“Hey, buddy.” Alex pops his head around my room door and smiles thinly. I should have known that one of my brothers would turn up soon. When it’s visiting hours, they rarely leave me alone. “Bad time?”
“Every moment is a bad time right now. I’m stuck here and they just won’t let me out.”
“Because they’re trying to take care of you, that’s why. Not to punish you.”
“Well, it sure as hell feels like a punishment,” I grumble. “It’s pissing me off.”
“I hope what I have to tell you is good news then. I would like to cheer you up.” I watch as he steps across the room and takes the nearest seat to me. “I have some news about Maria.”
“Please, for the love of God, tell me that they have caught her. It’s driving me mad sitting here, waiting for answers.” I push myself in to a sitting position. “I will calm down about getting out of here if that’s the case.”
“They have caught her, yes. She has been locked up and it doesn’t look like she will be getting out.”
Relief floods me. “That’s good. I don’t want to worry about her escaping. It’s the last thing I need.”
“There is a bit more to it than that.” Alex’s hesitation makes me worry. Instantly, I began to panic, thinking the absolute worst. I imagine everyone in my life being hurt by her before she was finally caught. Alex can forget it if he wants me to calm down after that. “She was found at Tami’s house.”
“Oh my God, is Tami hurt?” I demand. “Did she get to her again? Is that what the threat was about?”
“Er, I don’t know. She didn’t hurt Tami, but she did have a gun with her…”
My blood turns to ice, my limbs to lead. I wouldn’t be able to move for anything right now. “A gun?”
“Yes. So, while I don’t know what the threat was, she was clearly intending to hurt Tami. It’s a good job that someone overheard and called the cops because now she won’t be able to hurt her.”
I can hardly breathe. It doesn’t matter how furiously I suck in deep; nothing is working. My lungs are ragged and raw, stressed out. I keep seeing Tami being shot over and over again. Her body exploding, blood everywhere, and Mari letting out that horrible cackle of hers as she gets what she wants at last.
“Tami,” I gasp out through the painful breaths. “I need to speak to her.”
“I thought you might, so I brought my cell phone for you to check in on her.”
I grab the cell phone hungrily and dial her number. I don’t think until I actually hear her speaking, I will be able to accept that she’s okay and alive. I know that Alex would have told me if not, but still…
“Hello?” Oh God, I almost crumble as I hear her. She doesn’t sound hurt. “Alex?”
“No, it’s me. It’s Brad, I just… I want to talk to you, I want to… to… are you okay?”
She pauses for a beat too long before answering. “I’m fine, thank you. Are you okay?”
“I am, I’m much better now I have spoken to you.” I clutch the phone tighter to my ear. “Did you get caught up in more Maria drama? I’m so sorry about that. I feel so useless here.”
“It’s okay. She’s locked up now, so I don’t need to worry anymore.”
I don’t like the way that her voice sounds. She’s all distant and cold, a bit like she’s hurting. It isn’t supposed to be this way; I need to see her so I can sort this out properly.
“Please come in to the hospital,” I beg her. “Please, come and talk to me. I need to see you.”
“I… I…” She doesn’t seem to know what to say which only makes it worse. She’s definitely trying to pull away from me because this is too hard for her. “Yes, okay I will come and see you as soon as I can.”
“You will?” That’s great. I am still hopeless over the phone, but face to face, I can solve this. “Okay great. I would just feel so much better that I can talk to you. I think… I think we need to talk.”
“Yes,” she whispers back. “Me too. I think there is a lot that we need to say.”
“Like what?” I know that I should wait, but her tone freaks me out. “What do we need to discuss?”
“I… I think that it’s better if we talk face to face. I won’t be long. Okay? Then we can talk.”
I don’t know what to say to this. I part my lips, but no words come out. Not that it matters. Tami is already gone. She has hung up because she can’t seem to stand talking to me for another second longer. This isn’t good. Me and her might be in some serious trouble here. Everything might end. I have considered that as a possibility before, but now it’s a bit more real, meaning I need to digest it somehow. But how can I consider losing the only woman that I have ever loved? How can I sort through this in my mind? It’s giving me a bout of anxiety even now and she hasn’t confirmed that we are definitely done yet. I’m going to fall apart.
“All sorted?” Alex asks me with anxiety in his eyes. He must have heard just enough to know that it isn’t good news. “I mean, she said that she would come, right? That’s something.”
“What do you think about all of this, Alex?” I need to know, to hear the opinion of another person.
“In regards to what?” he answers cautiously. “I don’t know if I like where this is going.”
“I don’t know.” I shrug helplessly. “All of me. Me with someone so much younger…”
“Hey, you can’t help who you fall in
love with,” he snaps back almost defensively. “The age difference is nothing if you have love for one another and it really seems like you do.”
“Yeah, I know,” I reply sadly. “I definitely do, but I don’t know if this whole mess has put her off me. I shouldn’t have a crazy ex – who isn’t even really an ex – crawling out of the wood work like this.”
“How would you feel if the situation was reversed and it was her ex?”
“Well, I would defend her,” I shoot back instantly. “And I would take care of her, but it’s different, isn’t it?”
“Why?” Alex leans back and gives me a strange look. “What makes it so different?”
“Her age. She’s too young to be dealing with this kind of crap.”
“What’s the issue with her age exactly? Why does it keep coming back to that? Does she feel much younger when you are together, so you are just using this as an excuse or something?”
“No way. She doesn’t feel young at all. It feels right. There’s no issue when we are together. It’s only when shit like this happens that I start to consider it. I get all up in my head about it.”
“Then there really isn’t an issue, Brad.” Alex smiles. “If it’s right when the two of you are together then there really isn’t anything to worry about. You are the only one living your life. Not other people.”
I get it. He speaks a lot of sense actually. I shouldn’t be worried about the opinions of other people…
“Tami though,” I say sadly. “I am worried about what she thinks. The fact that she hasn’t been here, and she sounded all distant on the phone. She might be pulling away because of Maria.”
“There isn’t really anything you can do about that, unfortunately,” Alex replies sadly. “You can’t control what other people want. The only thing you can do is control your actions.”