The idiot was hip-deep in the drug world.
From the little Cullen had seen of him, the dipstick didn’t strike him as the operation’s brains, which meant this situation became a little more serious. Lucky for Grace, she was at the bottom end of the country and away from the drama in Auckland. Cullen decided he’d ask Josh to do some digging if he had time.
He tapped a quick text to his friend, promising to call him later with more details.
Also, in the morning, he needed to inspect that gnome statue more closely. The dumbass had sounded desperate to get it back. Cullen’s jaw tightened. It was also possible the douche had installed concealed cameras to aid him in his business. Smart move, but not so great for Grace.
He loathed the idea of the tosser spying on Grace’s every move. That showed something deeper and more sinister. The jerk had planned to marry her and continue the pretense. Why? He’d already taken Grace’s money, and if he was sleeping with other women, he cared little for her.
It was a wonder the neighbors hadn’t reported the strange visitors, but Grace hadn’t noted them as odd until this week.
Cullen pondered this anomaly. Perhaps they arrived to a schedule. Most of their neighbors had long driveways with attractive gardens in front. Cullen tapped his chin, the puzzle nagging at him.
His phone beeped in a return text from Josh.
Where are u? I thought you were doing reno at your place. You’re not home.
“Nosy bugger,” Cullen muttered with a broad grin. He texted back. I’m on Stewart Island with Grace. Will call tomorrow. Busy. His smile turned evil as he tapped send and switched off his phone.
Grace scuttled from the direction of the bathroom and sidled around the bed, a flowery sweetness floating in her wake. She opened a drawer without glancing his way, prompting his curiosity. He would’ve bet good money Grace would’ve changed in privacy. She shot him a glance and blushed a deep red before she turned away.
“Something wrong, Gracie?”
“N-no,” she murmured, the reply so low, he barely heard.
“Your behavior indicates otherwise.”
“Shut your eyes,” she ordered. “Are they shut?”
“Yes,” Cullen lied. He wasn’t about to forfeit an opportunity to see any part of his Grace. Usually, she dressed in flowing layers that concealed and did little to showcase her hourglass figure. That had changed this week, and her hesitation now intrigued him. That she might change while in the same room as him had his pulse racing and any gentlemanly behavior squashed. This was his Grace, and he’d waited for so long.
Hell, he’d almost lost out to the knucklehead.
He wanted Grace in his life permanently.
Yeah, this was war.
Grace hesitated, hovering by the side of the large bed. At least, it had seemed massive before Cullen had taken possession of half of the king mattress.
Could she do this?
A sharp, short giggle burst from her. Liquid courage. She noted Cullen’s intense interest, and her hands trembled, but she unbuttoned her blouse and shrugged the silky fabric off her shoulders. Instead of picking it up straightaway, she let the garment drop to the floor. Her bra was next, and a quick flick of her wrist had her heavy breasts freed from the binding. She let the lacy garment slip to the floor too. She reached for the flimsy red negligee and slipped it over her head. A low masculine groan echoed through the still room, and Grace whirled to face the bed.
“I told you to keep your eyes shut.” Accusation shaded her words.
“No, you told me to close them. You didn’t mention a time limit.” His grin and the expression in his sparkling blue eyes were decidedly wolfish.
His amusement infected her, and she had to force her return scowl. Her stomach did a weird flip—not nausea, but a close nerve-related cousin. “We’re friends. You shouldn’t stare at me like a wolf. It…it makes me uncomfortable,” she finished in a rush.
Cullen stilled, his smile disappearing. “No, we’re not friends.”
“What?” She didn’t have to pretend confusion as a dagger of pain sliced and diced her chest. “If we’re not friends, then why are you here? I thought you liked me.”
Cullen sat straighter in the bed, a brooding frown settling into his features. His broad chest rose and fell, attracting her attention. His naked chest.
When she realized she was staring, she wrenched her gaze off him and aimed it at her feet. Much safer. That way, he couldn’t see how much he’d upset her. She’d had a cheerful buzz going when they’d come inside. She’d thought he enjoyed her company as much as she relished his.
“Gracie, look at me.”
“My name is Grace.”
“All right.” Cullen’s voice dropped in temperature. “Will you please let me explain?”
Swallowing hard, she lifted her gaze, her heart beating faster and fear blotting out her happiness.
“Why don’t you sit on the bed before you topple on your arse?”
She followed this instruction, her pulse racing. Her mouth tasted of chalk and desert dust, and no amount of swallowing helped to moisten the aridness or drag back her feel-good mood.
“Grace, a long time ago, you told me you valued the truth.”
Her throat worked in another useless gulp. “I do, but that doesn’t mean I’m not apprehensive, that I don’t fear what the truth might mean.”
Cullen issued a weighty sigh, almost as if she’d disappointed him. “Oh, Grace. Don’t you understand? This is the truth. I’ve had a crush on you for years. At first, I hoped the sentiment would fade because we have six years between us, as you keep reminding me. You didn’t think of me in that way, so I kept the banter going and resigned myself to enjoying each moment I spent with you. The last couple of tours have been hard. I’ve lost friends.” It was his turn to swallow. “Close friends. It was you who got me through. I’d read your emails, and they’d place me back at home. You were the one I wanted. The last time I came home, you soothed me. Quiet moments with you helped me to put myself back together again. But you didn’t show any signs of change. You still thought of me as a friend. I figured I had time to change your mind.”
Grace pressed her hand to her mouth, shocked, surprised, amazed by his confession and unable to formulate anything resembling a reply.
Cullen continued. “This last mission was bad, Grace. I lost another two friends. Brothers. They were family because we lived and worked and had trained together from the beginning. After Chad and Jimmy died, everything changed. I did a lot of soul-searching about what I wanted. You figured in most of my plans, so I made myself a promise. I had a plan until I met you outside your place, and you mentioned you were getting married. It almost killed me, hearing that,” he whispered. “I understand you’ve just come out of a relationship and are feeling hurt and raw. Disillusioned with the male sex, but I wanted you to know the truth—how I feel about you. Why don’t you finish undressing and get into bed? That crook in your neck can’t be comfortable.”
“Okay.” Grace stood on shaky legs and wriggled out of her skirt. She took a few moments to pick up her discarded clothes and toss them over the back of an easy chair. It was the same place where Cullen had placed his garments, and she frowned at the combo of clothing. Shaking herself, she hustled to the bed, her skin rippling with a prickle of awareness the entire time while her mind replayed his confession.
Cullen tugged back the covers on her side of the bed. “Your body is gorgeous, and it really does it for me. I’ve dated other women, and let me tell you, the skinny, diet-conscious ones are a pain in the butt. They suck all the enjoyment from a delicious meal. We eat dozens of MREs—that’s meals ready to eat—and they are not a culinary experience. They contain the right vitamins and minerals, but the taste and flavor are elusive. They’re convenient. A meal should be a sensual experience. When I share a meal with a woman like you who knows food and luxuriates in the flavors and textures, it makes the lunch or dinner or breakfast way more memorable. An experience
. Please remember that.”
“But I’m considered overweight.”
Cullen shrugged. “Maybe, but you can’t fight genetics and your given body shape. All you can do is work with what you’ve got. Eat balanced meals and exercise.”
“You make it sound easy.”
“In my experience, if a person wants something badly enough, they’ll do the hard work to achieve their goals. If you’re losing weight for someone else, then you’re going to fail. You’re a talented chef and not just at baking cakes and cookies. Own it and don’t let anyone drag you down.”
Her throat grew tight, emotion backing up behind a knot that swallowing refused to shift. Cullen sounded sincere. He meant every word.
He frowned, his expression neutral while he waited for her response. “Why don’t you come closer? You still don’t look comfortable over there.”
Grace hesitated. The urge to ask questions grew in her, but that stubborn knot remained. Her mouth opened and closed before she pressed her lips together in exasperation. No matter what Cullen said, she considered him a friend, and she trusted him. She shifted her butt until her legs brushed Cullen’s longer limbs. He slipped an arm around her shoulders, a pleasant heat sinking into her skin. For an instant, she held herself still, then she relaxed against Cullen.
“Thanks,” he murmured and kissed the top of her head.
Her confusion returned and with it disbelief. Cullen truly liked her in that way?
“Stop thinking so hard,” he said, his warm breath sending a frisson down her neck and across her chest. The sensation sank to her breasts and signaled her nipples. Grace gulped, embarrassment a hairsbreadth away.
“That’s better,” he said in a gruff voice. “Now, where was I before we got distracted by food and body image? Oh, yeah. The wedding. That news blindsided me, but I considered it a sign when you came to the pub. I decided I’d do anything to pursue you and win you around to my way of thinking. I care for you, Grace. Hell, I’m more than halfway in love with you. But, as I also said, you’ve just finished with the moron, and I get that you’ll want to go slowly, that’s if you’re interested in me.”
Grace turned her head to check his expression. His eyes glowed in the faint light of the bedside lamp, and what she glimpsed in them was tenderness. “I—”
He placed his fingers over her mouth. “Think about us over the next few days because this has come as a surprise to you. Give yourself a chance to become used to the idea. The six years between us is nothing and not worth the worry.”
“Cullen, do you really want to have children?”
The flash of longing in his eyes gave her the answer. He wanted to have kids, so one of them needed to be practical.
“I’m almost thirty-five. You’re in your late twenties. I don’t even know if I can have children.”
“Grace.” Cullen’s big hands cupped her face and turned her to face him. “Sure, I’d like to have a family, but don’t you get it? It’s you who matters to me. You’re the one I want. My friends have kids, and since my friends are more like brothers, I’m an uncle to dozens of boys and girls already. If I want to spend time with short people, all I have to do is offer to babysit. There are heaps of other options: adopting, fostering kids, or babysitting for my friends. Hell, we could even get a cat or dog or both. You’re the important one to me in this equation.”
Grace’s mouth rounded, but not a scrap of sound emerged.
“What were you going to say?” he finally growled.
“Your declaration has taken me by surprise. So much has happened in the last week, and I feel as if I can’t gain my footing.”
“Which is why I’m suggesting you think about my proposal.”
“You’ve said a lot,” she said. “It’s going to take me a while to get my head around it.”
“Understandable. We’ll just have fun this week. I’ve almost completed my four-year term of service. This time, I’ve decided not to sign up again. Josh offered me a job. He needs someone to fill in for him when he has things to do with Ashley or goes home to Eketahuna. He’s got an interest in a property in Moewai, which isn’t far from Eketahuna. Josh needs someone trustworthy to look after his interests in Auckland.”
“I worry about you when you’re overseas.”
Cullen squeezed her. “I’m well-trained and work with a great team. We prepare as much as we can, given the circumstances. I think of you when we’re apart and worry too.”
“About me?” she asked in surprise.
“You’ve mentioned a couple of dates you’ve gone on in your emails. My imagination tells me any man with half a brain will see the treasure you are and snap you up before I get a chance. You didn’t tell me about Dipstick. He came as an unpleasant surprise.”
“The last six months have been busy. I haven’t emailed any of my friends—not as often as I used to.”
“I’m not blaming you,” Cullen said. “I haven’t been the best correspondent either.”
Grace yawned, slapping her hand over her mouth a few seconds too late.
“You’re tired. Let’s try to sleep because we have a busy day tomorrow.”
Grace nodded and got comfortable while Cullen turned off the bedside lamp, plunging them into intimate darkness.
“Your answer wasn’t a hell, no, so I figure I won’t upset you too much if I cuddle,” he said after a while.
Grace recalled the previous night and winced.
“Sorry,” Cullen said with a hard sigh. “I don’t mean to pressure you.”
Grace considered everything he’d said, the blunt truths he’d given her while making himself vulnerable. Jeff had never had a conversation like that with her. Never. “I’d like a cuddle,” she said before she could second-guess herself.
“Thank fuck,” Cullen muttered, and two seconds later, he had his arms wrapped around her while she lay with her back pressed against his chest. At first, she held her muscles tensely, but Cullen’s even breathing suggested he’d fallen asleep. She allowed the tension to slide away and thought over everything he’d told her. He’d glossed over losing his friends, but she’d sensed the deep well of emotion inside him. Their deaths had shaken him and turned him more introspective.
She’d always liked Cullen, but their age difference and the fact she’d babysat him had made him out of bounds. She’d never contemplated the possibilities. He was a strong, good-looking man who turned heads when he walked down a street. Confidence radiated from him, yet he didn’t pose or act with superiority. Best of all, he never treated women like objects. She’d met women he’d dated, although not recently. Oh! Most of those women had borne serious curves.
Points for Cullen. He would never put her down. Not like Jeff, who’d excelled at making her feel stupid and insecure. Small. Good enough to steal from, though.
Wow, she was such an idiot. When he’d started changing and putting her down more, she should’ve wised up faster.
While she’d told Cullen she had age and fertility concerns, the truth was her biological clock ticked louder each year. Tick. Tick. Tick. It had been part of why she’d rushed into the relationship with Jeff.
If only she’d listened to the tiny voice that had muttered this thing with Jeff was too fast. Oh, he’d been wily. He’d said and done everything to convince her they’d have a brilliant marriage—a blissful future. Heck, discovering him with Julia had hurt so badly, yet if she were honest with herself, it had been her pride, not her heart that had cracked.
A telling truth.
Grace allowed herself to consider Cullen again. Trustworthy—that was never a doubt. But what about when they grew older?
“Grace,” Cullen grumbled. “I can hear your mind whirling and tumbling. Men live shorter lives than women. A fact. Now, can you please stop worrying and try to sleep?”
“I wasn’t moving.”
“Your brain is going a hundred miles an hour. If you don’t stop, I’ll take drastic measures.”
Intrigue bombarded her. Feminine
curiosity. “Like what?”
Cullen rolled without warning, and the next second, he’d levered over her and was smiling down into her face. Given the darkness, she couldn’t see much more than an outline.
“This,” Cullen said, and he kissed her.
While he’d kissed her before, not a single one of his kisses had rocked her like this one. He didn’t hesitate or start gently. His lips mastered hers and demanded her response. At first, she tensed, but he wasn’t rough, despite his confidence and clear experience. Her mind screeched to a halt. She did not want to imagine Cullen kissing other women.
That told her everything she wanted to know.
Grace stretched her arms and gripped his shoulders. He tensed until she made it obvious she was keeping him close rather than pushing him away. Ah, his confidence was a front.
Cullen licked the seam of her lips, urging her to part and allow him entry. Grace groaned, and her pulse spiked when Cullen’s tongue did a sensual dance against hers. Decadent darts of pleasure swirled through her as Cullen gentled the kiss and took it to slow and dreamy.
When Cullen pulled back, they were both breathing hard.
“I’ve imagined kissing you like that loads of times.” The backs of his fingers stroked over her cheek. “It was my favorite way to pass the time.”
Grace licked her lips, a slow smoothing of her tongue across her tender mouth. “I think,” she said, “that the actual kissing might be my favorite way to pass the day.”
11
PONDERING OPTIONS
“Fuckin’ bitch.” Jeff glowered at his phone and started to put the call through again before reconsidering. She wouldn’t answer. The stupid woman was growing a spine now when he needed her cooperation most.
What to do?
He strode the length of the dingy motel room while he considered the possibilities.
1. He was almost positive she had the gnome statue with her since he hadn’t recovered it from Royce, the arsehole who’d helped himself to Jeff’s gear.
Protecting the Bride Page 10