by Karli James
Chapter 20
Kara
An hour later and we’re all sitting in a large booth in the back of Shaney’s. Drew is across from me, and next to Liam, who is currently scowling at Nina. Allison is on my right, and Nina on my left. This is it. Boys against girls. Jude is silently laughing into his beer as Drew sits stoic, yet sneering at Allison who can’t resist whispering in my ear every five minutes about how much she hates me for not telling her that I invited my brother to this outing.
“The least you could have done is be honest with me, given me the opportunity to bail. I mean, c’mon Kara, you know your brother hates me.” She shakes her head furiously at me as I try to explain, until ultimately, I just apologize with a shrug and take a sip of my own beer.
“Well this is fun. Isn’t this fun guys? All of us hanging out. Six friends. Hey, like Friends, the show. Nina, I hear you’re a big fan.”
“I love that show. But we are not them. We are not as funny, or as good looking, or…as friendly.” I notice Liam cock a brow in her direction at the same time Jude dramatically gasps.
“Speak for yourself Nina, I’m sexy as hell.”
“Ew, though.” We all laugh except for Liam.
“Seems kinda harsh Neens, four of us are siblings, and at least three of us have grown up together as best friends. Are you saying that you and I aren’t friends anymore?”
Nina narrows her eyes at him, cocks her head to the side.
“Honestly, Liam…I really don’t know if we are anymore.” Hurt flashes across Liam’s features, but just as quick he’s back to being cool and composed.
“Is that so? And what have I done to you to deserve such a demotion in your life?”
“It’s a series of things really. All of a sudden you think you have a say in parts of my life that you actually have zero say in. On top of which, you totally take advantage of my friendship and use me to handle your dirty business, all the while forgetting I exist once your dick spies something new and shiny it just can’t resist. I’m not here to be your break-up artist, and I’m not here as a convenience. If we grew up together, and you consider me a lifelong best friend, then you should know me well enough by now to know that your actions as of late are not only idiotic, but hurtful.”
The table has grown silent, and Jude’s beer has paused at his lips as he takes this new information in.
“What are you talking about, break-up artist?”
“Oh Jude, you sweet, naïve thing. How do you think he got rid of Paige so easily this time?”
“Dammit Nina!” She shoots a look over to Liam like, “so?”
“Liam, tell me you didn’t have my sister break up with the woman who was pissed at you in the first place, because of your relationship with Nina. That is the stupidest shit you’ve ever done, and you’ve done some very stupid shit my friend.” Nina is sputtering her drink, Drew is staring, and Allison is gasping, while I’m dying inside from all of this dramatic excitement. It’s like watching a movie unravel before my eyes.
“She what? Liam! I’m sorry, did you fail to mention to me that your girlfriend had a problem with our relationship?”
“I didn’t see the point,” he ground out. “At the end of the day, it didn’t matter what she thought of my relationship with you. It didn’t matter if she felt insecure or jealous, because I wouldn’t have things any other way. Despite what you think Nina Elizabeth, I would never ditch our relationship for another one, male or female. However, apparently, we’re not friends anymore, so what does any of it matter?
Oh, and yes Jude. To answer your question, I did in fact ask your sister to kindly tell Paige to get the hell out of my life for good, because she’s toxic. Because when it comes to her I end up caving into her manipulative tears, regardless of the fact that I have zero feelings for her on any level. Now, if you’ll all excuse me, I’m heading to the bar. Would anyone like anything? Except for Nina.”
Liam escapes before any of us really have time to answer him, and I look over at Nina’s face, which has gone pale. Drew and I exchange a look, and Allison is sucking down her mojito and avoiding looking anywhere except the wall behind her. I place a tentative hand on Nina’s shoulder.
“Nina, are you okay?” She’s shaking her head slowly, her mouth opening and closing like a guppy, and her eyes have the slightest sheen of moisture. Oh dear.
“No I…what the hell is going on here? Someone better fucking tell me what is going on. I don’t understand any of this. Why wouldn’t he tell me that I was causing a problem for him and Paige?” I’m surprised when it’s Drew’s soft, yet firm voice that speaks up.
“There wasn’t a need, Nina. He just told you. And what you’re not hearing is that you weren’t the one causing the problem. Paige’s insecurities, even if on some level were valid, were causing the problem. Liam values you enough to put you above that relationship, and he certainly values you enough to keep a piece of information that in the end, would only make you feel like shit—exactly as it’s doing now, to himself. He didn’t want you to take on that guilt, or those worries. He didn’t want that between the two of you, because for him, there was no choice. You are it.” I smiled at Drew, a silent thank you for his objective wisdom.
“Yes, but now I do know. And now I actually feel mad, and sad, and why? Why is this happening? Why are things weird? Liam and I used to be like bros. I’m basically the guy best friend he never had. No offense, Jude.”
“Uh, right. None taken. At all.” He rolls his eyes.
“Nina, if you want to understand your current relationship with Liam, then you need to be talking to him about this. And you certainly can’t sit there and tell the poor fuck that you’re not friends anymore. That’s five hundred percent bullshit and you know it. If you cut him out of your life, you’re not just hurting him, you’re hurting yourself. Now put your big girl panties on, walk over to him, and have a fucking adult conversation that doesn’t involve antagonizing him, or berating him for being a dumbass. If you want to work things out with him, you need to extend some grace in this circumstance. And try to look at it like, rather than he kept something from you, you were the person he chose to ask for help. Doesn’t that fucking say something to you?”
“I don’t know! What is it supposed to say?”
“Ask. Him. Go. Bye. We’ll be here when you idiots are done.”
She grumbles as she pushes herself off the end of the bench and out of the booth.
“Fine, fine, I’m going. Ass.”
“Love you, Neens.”
“Blech.”
Drew and I are chuckling, Allison is still silently hating me and getting trashed in equal measure.
“Ally, you might wanna slow down on that drink.”
Oh no. Why? He didn’t say it nasty, and he’s not even wrong, but…shit, here it comes.
“Should I, though? Why do you even care Drew? You’re not responsible of me, and as far as I can tell, I’ve been leaving you alone like a good girl all damn night, so how about, for just fucking once you keep your damn mouth shut when it comes to me.”
There’s actually way more venom in her tone than any of us were expecting, and Drew’s brows have cinched together so tight I’m surprised I can still see his eyes.
“Let’s making something real clear here, Princess. I don’t care. The amount of fucks I give if you drink yourself into a sloppy stupor are zero. And considering, that I too, have kept my mouth shut this entire fucking time while you’ve done nothing but run your mouth off about how much you hate that I’m here to my sister—oh right, like you don’t know you’re the loudest whisperer that ever existed, please get that shocked look off your face—how about you stop and think that for once I was trying to respect your friendship with Kara, and offer some kind advice. But please do, carry on. Drink it all up. Please make poor life decisions while you’re at it.”
Allison’s mouth opens to say something, but I’ve had enough. As usual.
“Alright assholes, times up. Times up on
being dicks to each other. Now I’ve talked to you both, separately and together about this. I do not get how you two hate each other so much. How can you love me so fiercely yet despise each other so thoroughly? Do I need to quote Jude here, and tell you to have an adult conversation and work this bullshit out so we can all hang out and get along? If you’re unable to converse politely, then please, do us all a favor and go back to ignoring each other. I’m not going to choose between you. I love you both. I need you both in my life. So, if you can’t get along, then just don’t talk to each other. Period. Got it? Now fuck if I don’t need a shot. You all are killin’' our vibe. Jude, why did we invite everyone out again? We should have stayed hermits.”
“Wanna leave, Presh?”
“NO!” Allison and Drew both yell at the same time.
“I guess we can’t. Someone might die, and I don’t want to be responsible. Will you snag the server on her way back around so I can order some shots, please?”
“Shots? Plural? Are you sharing?”
“No. You’ll need to order your own.” Jude chuckles as he sips his beer.
“On it.”
Drew pushes himself off the bench to walk toward the bar.
“Don’t bother Jude, I’ll get the shots.”
I look over at Allison who has grown quiet, and I notice a tear trailing down her cheek.
“Hey, hey, hey, what’s this? Why is this happening? Don’t be mad okay, but I do think maybe you should slow down.”
“Guys, am I really that bad? Am I really that…annoying? Or whatever it is that I am to him?” I’ve never seen Allison’s confidence shaken like this, and for a minute I feel a bit of anger toward my brother for making her question herself that way. Just then, Jude pipes up.
“Allison, no. Listen, Drew is the complete opposite of you. Often times we are easily aggravated by what we don’t understand. We’re afraid of it, too. We don’t get it; we balk at it. Drew is quiet, and reserved, but you’re the fucking sun. You just blaze in and make everyone love you. There’s nothing more, or better, or worse, or less about either of your personalities. However, even the sun can overwhelm the moon at times, right? It’s why we have night. Night, and day, shadows and light. Drew is living in his own shadows and he cannot fathom how someone can just be brightness personified.” Allison turns her head to look at me with wide eyes.
“Bitch, you better marry this motherfucker. I mean, who says that? Who the hell is this guy?”
I’m beaming at Jude who just shrugs and smirks, a slight tinge of red flushes his cheeks. I know exactly what Allison means. He so casually just tells people who they are; all their bests, like a little gift wrapped up in a shiny bow. He does so with such conviction that you believe him, and also, believe in yourself. Instantly.
“Mine.”
“Damn straight, Presh.” We’re like the cocky couple at the table who seem to have it all figured out, even though we’re still new and I’m sure somewhere, at some point one of us is going to screw something up. But for now? For now, in this moment we’re the put together ones. The smart ones. The we got our shit together, ones. It’s rather terrifying, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.
I look over at the bar and see Liam and Nina talking—really talking. Drew is standing a little farther down at the bar, waiting for our shots and drinks. He doesn’t notice me noticing him, staring at Allison with a touch of regret in his eyes. However, it’s there, and I can almost guarantee that by the end of the night, my very proper brother will have an apology offered in such a way she won’t be able to refuse it.
Drew is a lot of things, and he can definitely have his asshole moments, especially with Allison, but he’s not an actual asshole. He cares about people, he fights for them, he’s a protector. He’s observant, and thoughtful, and usually so careful with how he engages with others. It’s baffling; his lack of control in regards to Allison who really has done nothing much more than pester him like a little sister would—like I would.
Drew heads back over with a tray of shots, tankers, and whatdya know, a fresh mojito for Allison. He places it in front of her, and on the outside of the glass, written in condensation are the word, “I’m sorry.” She glances up at him in surprise and offers a slight smile, and nod. I’m shaking my head when my phone buzzes. I look down and see it’s from Jude. Jude, who is still sitting directly across from me.
Jude: Think I could steal that writing on the glass thing for one of my books? That’s kind of swoony, right?”
I’m silently laughing as I text him back.
Kara: Definitely swoony, and so un-Drew like. I’m a bit shocked to be honest.
Jude: Sexual tension. I told you this.
Kara: Ew. Gross. No. She’s like a little sister to him.
Jude: You’re so cute when you’re in denial.
Kara: I am not in denial. Those two are like oil and water, they do not mix. They’ve been bitching at each other for years.
Jude: Babe, that’s called foreplay. I know you don’t want to think about your bro that way, but I feel that you’re maybe being a touch naïve about this.
Kara: Scoff! I am not naïve! You’re a romance author in constant search of material.
Jude: That’s mean. Slightly accurate, but still.
Kara: Stop all this Drew and Allison and sexual tension talk. It’s insanity.
Jude: Can we talk about our sexual tension?
Kara: Don’t sext me here. That’ll make things difficult for me.
Jude: Difficult, or…wet? I mean, I definitely don’t want to dampen your fun time hon.
Kara: You’re the devil.
Jude: Devilishly handsome you mean.
Kara: Not even close to what I meant.
“Hey assholes, could you stop texting each other while the rest of us stare at you and wonder what the hell it is, you’re talking about?”
“Oh, hi Liam…Nina…welcome back.”
“Uh huh. Knock it off you ridiculously happy dicks. Put your phones away. The rest of us do not care.”
“Here, here!” The rest of the group all cheers and clinks glasses, and I realize we’ve achieved the impossible: we’ve brought everyone together in their mutual disgust of our relationship. Classic. I raise my glass to Jude as we share a smug, knowing smile. We’re awesome.
Chapter 21
Jude
“Presh! C’mon, you ready to go?”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah, don’t rush me.”
“Honey, I’m not rushing you. I’ve just been politely asking you, repeatedly for the past twenty-five minutes, if you’re ready to go.”
“I know, and I realize what this does to you, but please know that this was not my fault. I had a wardrobe malfunction and I was a bit at a loss. Feeling a loss more like. In mourning, if you will.”
“Kar, what the hell ya talkin’ about?”
Kara’s eyes drop to her toes, and she sighs heavily.
“Mafavjnsripd.”
“What? I can’t hear you when you mumble like that.”
She lifts her head to look at me directly in the eyes, and I swear her bottom lip trembles as she says: “My. Favorite. Jeans. Ripped.”
Now, I’m not stupid. At least not in this moment. I’m not going into this like a total moron. The question I need to ask, while also maintaining both expression and tone completely void of emotion is:
“Where?”
“The booty.”
I’m trying so hard not to laugh at how miserable she sounds, because seriously this is the last thing my semi self-conscious girl needs, and yet, I just want her to be able to laugh about it.
“How long have you had this favorite pair of jeans, Kar?”
“I don’t know…three or four years, maybe.”
“And how often do you wear, and wash them?”
“A lot.”
“Okay so they got worn out. Obviously, they were threadbare, babe. It was bound to happen. Favorites get worn in. They rip. Then you get a new pair and break them in until
they become the new favorite. It’s a jeans cycle, baby. We all go through it.”
“Oh yeah, stud? Have you ever had a pair of jeans just rip right out the back? Like your ass was trying to bust out of jail?”
“Yes! I have. These buns are not immune to that horrible sound. But then I went shopping and I found a new pair that happen to fit my ass even better than the pair that ripped. I found a blessing in it all; my silver lining, Kara. We’ll find yours too.”
“Are they the jeans that you’re wearing now?”
“Yes, as a matter of fact.”
“They do make your tush look cute.”
“Thank you. I know. And whatever kind of jeans you’re currently wearing, also hot. Embrace it. Own it. Old jeans did you a favor. New jeans are killin’ it on the first day of school, kid.”
“I know it’s dumb to be sad, but they were my faves! And they fit me so perfectly, and these ones are tight and kinda dig in, and they don’t make me feel what I felt in those jeans.”
“Kar, I want you to close your eyes and picture yourself in those previously favorite jeans. I want you to feel what you felt when you wore them.” She’s looking at me like I’ve officially gone and lost it.
“Do it.”
“Fine! Closing my eyes.”
“That’s good. Yes. Feel it, own it, wear that feeling. Not the new jeans, wear the feeling. Are you wearing it?”
“Y-yes. I think so.”
“Good, now open your eyes.”
Her eyes open and she looks at me with a smile.