by Blair Young
The more we talked, the more we opened things that I had started to heal from, and the more I felt like I was regressing back into the angry and frustration of the things that were going on before – things that I really wanted to forget about and things I wanted to let go. But, I was getting angrier by the second.
The more I thought about the injustice that had been in my life, the more determined I was to not only go to college, but to also get the justice that I deserved. I might not be able to do anything about Chad, but I was still going to keep searching for the murderer who had taken my parents from me.
I could ignore Dean, and I refused to talk about him with the counselor, but I wasn’t going to ignore the fact that there was still a murderer on the loose, and no one was doing anything about it. I would bring him down, personally if I had to, but he wasn’t going to get away with what he had done.
By the time we reached the end of the hour together, I didn’t feel like I had accomplished much. But, the therapist was satisfied that I had opened up about some of the trauma in my past, and I knew Susan would be happy with the fact that I had stayed for the full hour and been honest with the therapist throughout.
It might not have helped me, or even come close to solving anything, but this was my end of the bargain. If I wanted to finish my schooling at home, then I was going to have to suffer through these sessions at least until the end of the year. Considering the benefit it meant to me not having to see Chad or Molly or any of the other kids, I was willing to go through with it, even if I wasn’t feeling any change inside.
I would get through the rest of the year, and I now felt a renewed sense of urgency to find the person who killed my parents. Chad might have gotten off without having to pay for what he did to me, but whoever had done that to my mother and father wasn’t going to.
With the passing months, I was sure they thought they had managed to pull off the ultimate crime and actually get away with murder, but the fact of the matter was that I was coming for them. I would get them, that was for sure. I would bring them to justice.
I wouldn’t ever give up until they were behind bars. Then, I could move on with my life and know that my parents had been avenged. It wasn’t going to bring them back to me, and it wasn’t going to make me feel any better in losing them, but I would feel justified.
They weren’t going to be forgotten. They weren’t going to be shoved to the side and buried. They would get what they deserved. And they deserved justice in its entirety.
No matter how hard I had to work for it, I would bring it to them. It could be next week, next year, or ten years for now, but I was on the hunt, and I was filled with a new fire to make it happen at last.
And I wouldn’t stop until I did.
Chapter 25
Sutton
After my appointment, I decided to stop by the office my dad used in Secret Bay. It was largely abandoned, and it was spooky being there alone, but I felt close to him when I was there, and I missed him. Even though I hadn’t been close to either of my parents, I missed them both, and I would give just about anything to be able to talk to them one more time.
I had taken for granted the fact that they were always going to be there, and it felt strange knowing I was never going to see either one of them again. But, I didn’t want to feel sorry for myself. I had spent so much of my life feeling sorry for myself, I wasn’t going to do that anymore.
I would take the pain that I felt in losing them and turn it into something good. After opening the wounds all over again therapy that afternoon, I was more than a little determined to actually get to the bottom of things. I wanted to know what happened to them, and I would get answers.
Looking around the office, I tried to find things that I might have missed before. But, I had been so thorough in my search both times I had been there in the past, things looked just like they had when I was there previously. It was hard to imagine that my father had been there personally so many times, and I wished there was a way he could see me there now.
I flipped through the files in the cabinet once more, looking more closely at the files that were marked as closed. Nothing that I saw seemed to be as important as the file that had been stolen out of my bedroom, and I still wanted to know why it was active when he died.
More than that, I wanted to know why Damon’s parents, Susan, and Dean were all listed on the file. Then, I had an idea. I had cleared the names of Damon’s parents as suspects in the murder, but I had been too afraid to talk to Susan about the file in the beginning. I didn’t trust her at first. But, knowing what I knew about her now, I felt like I could bring it up to her.
At least, if I were to catch her by surprise, I might be able to get some answer out of her that would help me in my own search.
Nothing in the office seemed worth taking, so I made my way back to the house. As I walked through the door, Susan and Damon both greeted me with wide smiles.
“How was counseling?” Susan asked.
“I hate it, you know that,” I said. “But the therapist thinks we made progress.”
“I’ll talk to her next time I’m in and see if there’s something we can do to make it better for you,” Susan said.
“I’m not sure there’s a way to do that unless we can stop talking about how I feel and what the trauma is doing to me in life,” I said.
“That’s sort of the point of therapy, isn’t it?” Damon teased. I rolled my eyes, but Susan changed the subject.
“I’ve got a surprise for you,” she said.
“What is it?” I asked.
“I went down to the school and spoke with several people down there, and you’re officially going to be able to finish the year here,” she beamed. “I made it clear you aren’t comfortable going to school with Chad down there, and they agreed it would be healthier for everyone if you got to finish out the year at home.”
“Really!” I exclaimed.
“I’m jealous and want to do the same thing,” Damon said with a laugh, but Susan shook her head.
“You’ve got no good reason to be here during the day, and if you were, I can imagine you would blow off school more than you already do,” she said. “Sutton’s taking this a lot more seriously so she can get into college.”
“If I go to college can I?” Damon asked, but Susan rolled her eyes.
“I can see you saying that just so I give in,” she said.
“You know me too well,” Damon laughed, but I was thrilled. It was going to be hard not seeing Abby as much, but I knew she would understand, and we would still be able to hang out when she wasn’t in school. It wasn’t like we were able to see each other that much during the day anyway.
“When can I start?” I asked.
“Right away,” Susan told me. I got your books and your assignments, so you don’t have to worry about a thing.”
“Thank you, thank you!” I walked over and threw my arms around her. “Thank you!”
“I’m glad you’re happy,” Susan said with a smile. “I know I’ve not been the best mother for you most of your life, and I really want to make it up to you as much as I can now. Just tell me what you need from me, and I’ll do my best to be there for you.”
“Do you mean that?” I asked suddenly.
“Of course,” she said. “Why?”
“There is something I want to ask you, but I’m not sure how. I don’t want you to get upset,” I said. Damon shot me a look, and I knew he knew what I was thinking. But, he didn’t say anything, so I continued. “It’s about my parents.”
“What about them?” Susan asked with raised eyebrows. I took a deep breath, my heart racing. I wasn’t sure how to say what I wanted to tell her, so I quickly explained the whole thing. I told her about the file, and how we found her name along with Dean’s and Richard’s and Pam’s.
Susan listened as I explained I looked into both Richard and Pam, and I knew they didn’t have anything to do with the murder, but I still didn’t know why her name or Dean’s n
ame would be on the file, too.
“Why would my dad be investigating you?” I asked.
Susan shrugged. “I really don’t know. I’d have to say that he was probably making sure that I was suitable as a guardian for you. Though it’s been arranged for years that I would take you in in case something happened, I’m sure he kept tabs on what I was doing with my life to make sure I was still the kind of person he wanted his daughter to live with if something were to happen. Both your parents loved you very much.”
She gave me a hug, and I relaxed. I was sure Susan didn’t have anything to do with the murder, and the nonchalant way she explained the file made me believe what she said was true. It did make sense that my father would continue to keep an eye on her if he knew she would be my guardian.
But, it didn’t explain Dean.
He was the only one left on the file, and he wasn’t named as a guardian. But yet, my father had been investigating him as well. Was it possible that Dean could have had something to do with it? Was that the reason he was so creepy to me?
Or, was it possible that I’d missed the mark entirely?
Was the real killer out there somewhere, completely unknown to me?
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