by Aria Grace
“Are you okay?” The man takes a step forward but isn’t close enough to touch me.
Thankfully. Just because a pride of lions has gone doesn’t mean their king didn’t stay behind to finish the hunt.
I nod and hold my breath as I finish sliding my too-tight jeans up and over my ass. “Fine.”
He glances down as I tuck myself into my jeans and zip up. “You got friends to take you home?”
“No.” I take a few deep breaths before attempting to roll over so I can stand up. “I’ll be fine.”
After two unsuccessful tries to get to my feet, I feel gentle but strong hands close around my waist and lift me up to a standing position. “You should go to the hospital for a rape kit.”
Oh god. It really did happen. Tears flood my eyes as that word sinks in. I really was raped by one or more strangers. God, I’m so stupid. I totally deserve this. A strangled sob escapes my throat as I realize I got what I came here for. “It’s my fault.”
“What?” The man moves in front of me, holding me in place when I start to sway. “That was all consensual? Because I heard you saying no and asking them to stop.”
Humiliation weighs heavily on me as my knees buckle, dropping me to the ground. “I should have been more careful. I should have…” I can’t even verbalize all the things I should and shouldn’t have done tonight. Namely, coming here in the first place. “I need to go.”
With the help of the stranger, I toss my torn shirt in the trash and walk back out into the crowded club. My senses are heightened and the smells of alpha and sex and alcohol all mingle together, making my stomach roll. I want to be sick, to puke out whatever shit is in my system, but I just need to go. As people brush against my skin, I become more and more tense, completely freaking out at the proximity of so many strangers.
“Here, I’ll call a ride for you.” The stranger from the back room tucks me against his chest and carves a path in the crowd until we’re standing outside in the cool air.
It’s a nice night, but there’s a slight breeze and with the adrenaline waning from my system, my whole body is shivering as if I’m sitting in an ice bath.
“I’m Jude, by the way.” The man leans me against the building so I stay upright while he pulls his shirt off and slides it over my head. My arms are still wrapped tightly around my torso and I don’t bother pushing them through the arm holes, grateful to be cocooned in his warm shirt while he pulls up a ride share app.
“What’s your address?” My eyes are closed and my mind is foggy again so it’s not easy to concentrate on what he’s asking.
“On campus. Or…my brother’s…” I stop myself, not sure what is easier. My apartment is a half-mile walk from where the car will drop me off outside the permit-only lot. I’m not sure I’m up for the walk in my current state. I could go to Ethan’s but… No, that’s out of the question. Not only would I die of embarrassment if I had to explain to him or Freddie what I did tonight, but he’d probably want to go after that Brett guy and his friends… I can’t disrupt his family in that way. There’s a twenty-four-hour diner around the block. I can hang out there and have some coffee before I make the trek home. “Actually, I’ll just walk from here. Thanks anyway.”
The man gives me a hard stare before tapping into his phone. “No way. If you won’t go home, I’ll take you to the hospital so they can make sure you’re fine to be alone.”
“No.” I step away and stumble, almost falling on my face since my arms are still locked inside this man’s shirt. “Shit. What’s wrong with me?”
“You’re probably going into shock.” He steadies me again, this time not letting go as he checks his phone and looks out in the street. “I think that’s our car.”
“Our car?” After everything that happened tonight, I know I should be more concerned by his statement, but I don’t have the energy. In some ways, I almost hope he’ll finish me off. Everything hurts and I’m just so tired. And cold. Why can’t I warm up? “Just let me sit here for a few minutes.”
“Nope.” A car pulls up and the back door opens. Before I can protest, Jules…Jude…whatever his name is, scoops me up and slides me inside. “You’re coming with me tonight.”
* * *
Am I dead? I feel dead? Actually, I feel alive but I wish I were dead because everything hurts. My brain is pulsing as if my skull has shrunken and my heart beat has moved about a foot and a half north. I try to pry open my eyes but the sunlight filling the room is too bright. Why didn’t Ryker close the blinds last night? He’s obsessive about that. In the year that we’ve been living together, he’s never forgotten... The delicious aroma of eggs and bacon fills my nostrils and I’m suddenly awake.
And I have no idea where I am.
33
Jude
According to his license, Andrew Carson is only twenty years old and lives on campus at the university. He mentioned being in a dorm last night but he was so out of it that I wasn’t sure what to believe. I wish he would have let me take him to the hospital but he was so cold that I just wanted to get him warm. And the only place I could think to bring him was here. So, after wrapping him up in a down comforter, I got him settled on my couch and watched him sleep. All night long.
I dozed off a few times, but as soon as I woke up, I checked his pulse and temperature to make sure he was fine. The first few hours were tense, but by three in the morning, he was sleeping comfortably, curled up like a baby, and I finally stretched out on my recliner and got a few hours of shuteye myself.
Now, it’s almost seven am and he might have classes or work to get to. But instead of deliberately waking him up, I’m cooking a breakfast that no man can sleep through. The sizzling of the bacon alone could wake the dead, but the aromas coming out of my kitchen should have him up in no time.
And as if he’s reading my mind, Andrew starts to make some noises in the other room. I pour a glass of orange juice and grab a few aspirin before heading in to check on him. “Good morning.”
“Stay away from me.” He’s holding my fireplace poker out as a weapon while slipping into his shoes. “Just let me leave and I won’t tell anybody what happened.”
“Andrew, just relax. I think you’re misrememb—”
He thrusts the poker toward me then winces at the pain it causes. “I swear, I won’t tell the police anything. I don’t remember anything. Just let me leave, please.”
I hold up my hands and take a step back. “Yeah, of course. You can go at any time. I only brought you here because you didn’t want to go home.”
He looks down at the oversized hoodie I put him in last night. “Where’s my shirt?”
“It was torn. You really don’t remember what happened?” Shit. If I’m the only face he can associate with the night, that’s not good. “I didn’t hurt you. I swear.”
“Whatever.” He inches toward the front door with the poker aimed in my direction. “I won’t say anything. Just let me go.”
I heave out a heavy breath and watch as he shuffles out the front door. As soon as he hits the street, he tosses the fireplace poker onto my lawn and tries to run away. I want to chase after him to make sure he’s okay, but that will just make things worse. If he actually believes I’m the one who hurt him—the one who raped him—chasing after him will do more harm than good.
I turn off the stove and leave the unfinished food to cool while I jump in the shower, trying to wash away the nightmare of the past twelve hours.
* * *
Over the next two weeks, I try to focus on work, but it’s not easy. Dueling for prominence in the back of my mind are thoughts of the police coming to arrest me on assault charges and Andrew.
Sweet, innocent, bruised up Andrew.
Watching him sleep reminded me of the few moments of peace and contentment I saw in his eyes when he first got out on the dance floor. He was relaxed and happy as he moved with the music. Until that asshole grabbed his dick and scared him. And then he… Fuck, I hate thinking about it.
; When I walked into that room and saw Andrew unconscious on the floor with streaks of blood across his ass, I hated myself for not getting in there sooner. His arms and chest were covered in bruises and his hair was matted on his head as if it had been curled up in someone’s fist. And that’s probably exactly what had happened.
At the time, I didn’t press him for details because he was going into shock and I didn’t want to make things worse. But when he woke up and didn’t remember anything, I realized how stupid I’d been. Now he’ll live the rest of his life thinking the abuse and trauma he suffered was at my hands. And I’ll never get to tell him how sorry I am for not helping him sooner.
I knew something bad was about to happen when I saw the fear in his eyes, but I just finished my beer like I didn’t have a care in the world. Like a complete and total jack ass.
Murdoch is already ten minutes late for our meeting, so I pull up my email and start deleting spam until he finally drags his ass in. “Oh, good. You’re here.”
I slowly pull up my sleeve and look at my watch. “Yeah, I’ve been here since ten when our meeting was supposed to start.”
“Good.” He doesn’t seem apologetic at all as he arranges his coffee and a bowl of oatmeal on the table in front of him like he’s settling in for breakfast with his grandma. “Let’s see what you’ve got.”
It only takes me twenty minutes to go through my updated design and the reasoning behind my decisions. The next forty minutes are spent listening to him piss and moan about why he thinks everything should be different.
Just before he pushes back from the table, he gives me the best news I could hope for. “Well, Jude, I guess you’ve got a handle on things. I’ve got a sales conference to prepare for and some analyst meetings coming up so I’m going to be handing this project over to a new intern. He’s a design student at the university who is hoping to get some hands-on experience with a huge commerce site launch like this. He can do the grunt work of hunting down content and approvals for you, and you can just call me in when major milestones are met.” He stands up and brushes some brown sugar off the front of shirt. “We good here?”
“Yeah, sure.” I’m absolutely thrilled that I won’t have to work with this idiot anymore. Maybe Matt realized how useless he was and made the recommendation after my last few complaints. “When can I meet this intern?”
“He knows you’re here today, so I told him to find you after lunch. You’re eating with Matt today, right?”
I usually have lunch with Matt in the mezzanine café on the days I come into the office. It’s the only chance we get to catch up since he started dating an omega from some matchmaking site. I’ve only met the guy a few times, but I don’t see it lasting much longer. The guy is insecure and needy, never allowing Matt to hang out with friends unless he’s there too. And since he works at night, Matt is pretty much relegated to sit at home every night. Sadly, I am too, but I have no real reason to be…other than a lack of interest in socializing with strangers. “Yeah, we should be done by one.”
“Great.” Murdoch heads to the door with his coffee cup, leaving the rest of his shit on the table for someone else to deal with. Prick. “I’ll tell him to wait for you in here.”
“Thanks, Murdoch.” Awesome. Apparently, I’m the asshole who has to deal with his shit later. “I’ll see you later.” Preferably never.
34
Andy
Come on, Karma, don’t screw with me today. I don’t know what I’ve done to deserve this punishment, but today is stacking up to be completely craptastic. First, I spill coffee in my lap on the drive in to work, so I’ve got a dark stain in my crotch that looks like I pissed myself. With my shirt tucked out, it’s not really noticeable. But the extremely wrinkled shirttails that I’m now sporting aren’t much better to look at than the stain. And then, I realize the tracking file I spent four hours updating yesterday didn’t upload properly, and all the work I put into it was totally lost. So I’m already half a day behind on my new job, and it’s only the second day of my internship. Talk about pathetic.
But I’m excited for my meeting with the UX consultant. Chris said the guy knows his stuff and has a great concept for the new website. Chris also warned that this guy is a friend of the big boss, so I should just listen to what he says and try to learn something from him. And that’s fine by me because that’s exactly what I came here to do. I’ve always liked to draw, and the theories behind digital design are really interesting, but designing for the user experience is fascinating to me. I can’t wait to absorb as much as I can from this guy.
Jude Taylor is having lunch with the boss, so I set up my laptop in the conference room right at one o’clock and get back to my spreadsheet while I wait for Mr. Taylor to come in. I’m facing the door so I don’t miss the guy, but I’m trying not to look up every time someone walks by because that comes across as too eager. Although I am eager, I don’t want everyone to know it.
When the elevators open at a quarter after one, a strange stirring in my belly stops me short and I sniff the air around me. Nothing seems out of the ordinary, but something definitely is. Something is wrong…or right. I’m not sure which. Not until the man I’m supposed to be working with fills the doorway with his massive frame and looks straight down at me.
It’s him. The man who raped and beat me at a club is now standing in my office, blocking the only exit route, as I break out into a cold sweat.
His eyes are wide as he inhales deeply, looking almost as surprised to see me as I am to see him. “Andrew Carson? You work here?”
I reach for my phone and stand up, backing around the other side of the table as I pull up my video app. “Please don’t hurt me. I promised not to tell anyone. I still won’t.”
“I swear I won’t hurt you. Can you please just listen to me for two minutes?” The man’s surprised expression falls, and that strange stirring is back in my belly. Okay, it was definitely a warning. I’m going to have to get better about listening to my intuition.
I don’t know what to do or say. I don’t want to just scream in the middle of the office, but if he gets any closer, I will.
“Please?” he pleads. “Just a few minutes.”
I’m now at the far end of the room, but I’m still completely trapped. He must be able to see my fear because he backs out until he’s completely outside the room again.
“I don’t want you to feel trapped in there but we need some privacy.” He points to the chair I was just sitting in opposite the door. “How about we trade places? I’ll walk around the back of the table and you can come by the door. That way, you can leave when you want to…but we’ll still have some privacy to clear things up.”
I would like to have some clarity around that night. For the first few days, I didn’t remember a thing. But I’ve had a few dreams that seem like they could be memories. And in all of them, this man is helping me, not hurting me. So I think I need this time with him as much as he seems to want it. “Okay. You walk slowly in that direction.”
He does as I ask, slowly entering the room and circling the desk clockwise as I walk toward the door from the opposite side. When I’m right by the entrance and he’s a good ten feet away from me with a huge table between us, I can finally breathe again. And as much as I don’t want to hear it, I know I have to get the full story of what happened that night. “Okay, talk.”
He gives me a sad smile and sits down, making himself even more vulnerable while making me feel ten times safer. “First of all, it wasn’t me. I saw a group of alphas take you to the back room and you looked frightened.” He stares down at his hands as he speaks quietly. “After a few minutes, I got worried and decided to go make sure everything was okay. I heard you scream from behind a locked door so I busted it down. By the time I got in there, the guys had all hopped out a window and were gone. But you were bloodied and unconscious on the ground.”
I try to contain the tears that are building up in my eyes as he completes the puzzle that I only had a few
pieces to until now. “So you didn’t…”
“No.” He shakes his head vehemently. “Of course not. I would never… I swear, I helped you get dressed and called a car to take you home. But you didn’t want to go, and I couldn’t leave you, so I took you to my place.”
That doesn’t sound unfamiliar. In fact, telling him I would just walk home is one of the puzzle pieces I’d been mulling over in my head for the past week. I’m not sure why I didn’t want to go home, but I believe what he’s saying is true. “I believe you.”
“Thank you.” He exhales and lowers his chin to his chest as if relieved. “This has been weighing on me since you left.”
I nod, knowing how he’s felt because I’ve felt the same way. Not being able to remember how my body got so bruised has made me feel even more vulnerable than when I was first turned out into the street by my parents right after I turned eighteen. “Me too. And I guess I need to thank you for saving me.”
The man looks at me with intense eyes that are almost turquoise as they flit between both of mine. “I didn’t save you. If I had saved you, you would have walked out of there without a single bruise or…anything else. I rescued you too late.”
“Well, whatever you want to call it, no one else was there. If you hadn’t been, I’m sure things would have been much worse.” A shiver runs down my spine as I imagine what five guys could have done to me. “I think you saved me.”
He clears his throat and clasps his hands together. “Did you get to the hospital? I wanted to take you but you started to freak out. But you should run tests for…everything.”
I close my eyes and nod, unable to look him in the eye through my shame. “I did a full workup at the campus clinic. Didn’t tell them what happened but everything came back negative. I have to get tested again in three and six months, but if you were only a few minutes behind us, they probably didn’t get a chance to, you know, finish.”