by Wendy Vella
“Pardon, my lord?” Ace had missed what Lord Ryder said to him.
“Ace, we are a family who deal in first names unlike many others. Is there the slightest hope you and your brother can unbend enough to call me Will?”
“I’m Joe or Joseph,” the duke added, “and my wife is Penny.”
“Finn,” Lord Levermarch said, and my wife is Phoebe.”
“Thea,” she said softly and Ace remembered the conversation they’d had in Luke’s parlor about using first names.
“John,” Lord Howarth said amiably, which only made Ace want to plant his fist into his face.
“I shall try,” was the best Ace could do.”
The play started then and he sat back and attempted to enjoy the spectacle. Minutes later, his eyes were roaming around the hundreds of other guests filling the tiers on both sides of the theatre and below, before settling once again on Thea.
As if sensing his gaze, her shoulders stiffened briefly then relaxed. Her ears were small and perfectly formed and he wanted to lean forward and nibble one, which was an inappropriate thought to be having when her family surrounded him.
“Relax, I can feel the tension in you from here.”
Luke whispered the words into his ear.
“They are unusual people, your new family members, Fletcher, and unlike any of the nobility I know.”
Luke laughed softly. “Indeed they are. It took me a long time to feel I was worthy of walking alongside them, Ace, but it is due to them that I now feel comfortable doing so.”
Ace did not comment again, instead watching the actors cavorting around the stage in between studying Thea’s ears and the elegant line of her neck. He imagined releasing whatever held her hair up on her head and running his fingers through the silken black locks while he kissed her. When the curtain fell to signal intermission, Ace was the first to his feet, happy to look at something else if only for a short time, and get away from Thea and Lord Howarth. He would see if he could change places with someone…anyone, just so he did not have to fixate on the woman he could never have.
“Refreshments, I think,” Lord Levermarch said and everyone in the party agreed. They were soon mingling with the other guests and Ace saw a few people he knew. Some gave him questioning looks as they tried to work out who he was, considering the esteemed company he was keeping. Thea was walking with Lord Howarth, ahead of him, her hand on his arm, and once again, his was on top of hers.
“Lady Althea, have you given thought to my offer?”
He was close enough to hear Lord Howarth’s words, and quickly moved out of range as he had no wish to hear her reply. Turning his back, he continued his conversation with Lord Levermarch about a property he was looking into purchasing. Trying to focus, he answered the questions asked of him and wondered if tonight she would say yes to another man.
“If you will sit here, my lady, I shall procure us some refreshment and return momentarily.”
Thea didn’t sit, but she nodded to Lord Howarth and then wandered, needing a few minutes alone with her thoughts. Having Oliver at her back was unsettling as she was sure she could feel his eyes on her.
Seeing him and Lord Howarth together only highlighted the deficiencies in one and the strengths in the other. He was a nice enough gentleman, and Joe was right—accepting Lord Howarth’s offer would make her future comfortable. However, Thea did not want comfort. She wanted to live with a man who challenged her. She wanted Oliver Dillinger.
She’d seen Oliver as soon as she entered the theatre. He stood tall and proud beside his brother. Dressed in his evening clothes, he was so handsome and Thea hated that her first impulse had been to go to him.
“I will escort you back, my lady.”
Closing her eyes briefly, Thea did not turn to see Oliver, who now stood behind her. Looking at him made her ache, and as she was here with her family she could not afford to let her emotions show. Therefore, she needed to keep her distance from him.
“Please go back to the box, Mr. Dillinger. I wish for a few minutes alone with my thoughts and shall return as soon as Lord Howarth has procured my refreshments.” Thea kept walking, heading for a curtain where she knew a small alcove lay. Pushing it aside, she hoped it was not occupied.
“Are you ill, my lady?”
He had followed her. “No, now go away.” She had not meant to snap at him or even raise her voice, but her nerves were unsettled. The past week had put her on edge. He had been constantly in her thoughts, and Thea was terrified that whoever wanted him harmed would not stop until they had done so.
“Please, I just need a few minutes to myself, Oliver,” Thea added.
“My lady, it will take but a few minutes to get your family should you wish me to.”
Thea felt the anger flood her body as she spun to face him. He stood only a few feet away, looking at her with such worry on his handsome face that she wanted to weep and yell at the same.
“Thea!” she cried. “My name is Thea, Oliver, and you felt comfortable using it while you lowered my bodice so why can you not do so now?” Dear Christ, she sounded like a shrew. Surely she was going mad.
“I have asked you to forgive me for that.”
He stood there, composed, while she slowly fell to tiny pieces before him.
“And am I to forgive you for the incident in the carriage after the boxing also?”
“Yes.” He stood still as he watched her, when she wanted to twitch and move from one foot to the other. The helplessness of unrequited…God, it wasn’t love, surely? Was she to spend her life wanting one man while she lived with another?
“Just leave…please.” She was begging him now, the final humiliation. Next, she would beg him to kiss her again.
“Thea.” He spoke her name in a hoarse whisper, the only sign he was not as composed as he appeared.
“I-I cannot do this, Oliver,” she dragged her eyes from his, “be near you, so please just leave now before I do or say something I should not,” Thea said, uncaring of how pathetic she sounded. This man was her weakness and she could not have him. Therefore, she needed to take steps to deal with that weakness, and that included not being alone with him.
“Will you marry him, Lord Howarth?”
His words were calm again and that infuriated Thea, as calm was so far away from where she was right at that moment, she was unsure she would ever return to it.
“You need not concern yourself with whom I wed, as you have decided it can never be you.” Thea managed to lift her head up and speak slowly so her words sounded steady.
“Besides my birth, surely after having your life put in danger because someone was trying to kill me, you can see how wrong I am for you, Thea. Had something happened to you—?”
“Oliver, please go.” Thea was desperate now for him to leave her. “I know there can be nothing between us because you have said it is so, but I need time away from you.” She lowered her eyes again, not wanting to watch him leave, but instead she felt his fingers on her chin, lifting it until their eyes met.
“This is the way it has to be. Please understand that, Thea. I am no good for you, and you would be ruined if you married me.”
“But that—”
His kiss was gentle and passionate, and stopped her from saying anything further. Thea knew it was also a final parting, and that made her heart hurt. She rose to her toes, just to keep the contact longer, and slipped her arms around his neck. If she had to carry this memory with her, then she would make it a good one.
“Thea.” He dragged his lips from hers.
“Just one more kiss, Oliver, then we are strangers once more.”
It was no longer gentle, but a kiss of possession, a branding that would ensure she never forgot this man. His arms held her pressed against him and she stood on her toes, doing whatever she could to get nearer to Oliver.
“Unhand my sister!”
Thea opened her eyes to see Joseph, Lord Howarth, and the Countess of Simley all watching her and Oliver, with d
iffering expressions from horror and delight, the latter on the Countess’s face and Thea knew that by morning, those peers who were still in London would be very aware of what had taken place at Drury Lane. She also knew that this night would signal a change in her life—she was just unsure of the direction.
Chapter Ten
“I don’t want to hear any more from you on this matter, Althea.”
Thea looked across the desk at Joseph. His face was closed tight as it had been for the five days since he had found her in Oliver’s arms, with the rest of society looking on.
“I was only kissing him, Joseph. Why must we marry?” Thea had had this conversation many times in the last few days and her brother refused to change his stance on the matter.
“In case it has slipped your memory, sister, it was not only I that saw you in that man’s arms. Therefore, I cannot allow you to remain unwed after such a display, or your reputation will be ruined.
“I am ruined, so send me back to Twoaks. I am happy to remain there for the remainder of my days.”
“You are to be married to Oliver Dillinger. I may not like that fact or indeed him, yet what is done is done.” His face was closed and Thea knew with a sinking heart that nothing she said would change his mind.
She had seen Oliver only once, yesterday, and he had told her the arrangements were made and they would be wed at the end of the week. She had asked him if he wished to marry her and he had said, in a cold, unemotional voice, that it matters not, as they are to be married. He was angry. It smoldered deep inside him, and she feared it would do so for a long time to come.
Thea had tried to touch him, put her hand on his cheek, but he had pulled away, and she wondered where the man who had kissed her so passionately before they were discovered at the theatre had gone. This one wanted nothing to do with her and that hurt, as this situation was no more her fault than his.
“I’m sorry that you are being forced to wed a woman of noble birth when you so obviously wish you were not,” Thea had said after many abortive attempts to get him to speak to her. “But it is not only you that is angry about the circumstance of this marriage,” she had added. He had not replied, merely bowing and leaving her alone to think about what was to be.
She was not actually unhappy to be marrying Oliver Dillinger, but she had hoped he felt the same way—or a small measure of affection for her at the very least. However, it seemed he did not. She’d obviously been a fool to believe otherwise.
“I have made my decision and you will abide by it, sister, and you will make no attempts to run away or bribe footmen to take you. You behaved as you did which would suggest you are no longer a child. Therefore, you will take the consequences, even if it means marrying a man like Dillinger.” Joseph spat out the name.
“You say his name as if you had not invited him to share your box at the theatre, or spoken of him in flattering terms, Joseph.”
“He is not the man for you!”
“You bloody snob, Joseph. You don’t want me to marry him simply because he is a coal miner’s son.”
A flush of guilt filled his cheeks.
“He is not the right man for you. No man who would take advantage of a woman can be deemed honorable.”
“And you are such a saint, brother,” Thea replied in kind, the bite in her words making his eyes narrow. “You never kissed Penny before you were wed? Never compromised her in any way, I suppose.”
The color in his cheeks darkened and Thea realized she had scored a point.
“We are not discussing me. We are discussing you, Althea, and your wanton disregard for your reputation. Dillinger told me of your attendance at the boxing match and the early morning riding lessons.”
“He told you that?” Thea took a step backward as if she had received a physical blow to her stomach. Why would Oliver have betrayed her like that?
“He did.”
“The cad!” Thea felt off balance suddenly, wondering who this man was she must now marry. She’d thought she’d known him, but after this, perhaps she was indeed an innocent fool. That he would tell Joseph what she had been doing felt like a betrayal of everything they had shared.
What had they shared? the voice inside her head asked. Nothing more than a few kisses and riding lessons that she had obviously believed meant so much more than it really had. No, she had seen the look in his eyes at the theatre. Thea refused to believe she meant nothing to Oliver Dillinger. She hoped she did, anyway, or their marriage was indeed doomed.
“Thea.” Joseph rose as she felt the first tear fall.
Until that moment, she had held them at bay believing all would work out in the end, but now…now, she didn’t think that anymore. Oliver Dillinger had liked kissing her and holding her, but only on the proviso he didn’t have to wed her, it seemed.
“Don’t.” She lifted a hand as he made to come to her. “I know how you feel about me, Joseph, that I have let you down in every conceivable way.”
“Thea, let me speak—”
“But you raised me to be the person who stands before you today, brother. You taught me to be strong and do what I believed I should. Teaching Oliver in the park to ride was simply an act of kindness, and going to the boxing was something I had always longed to do, and it was not until the fighting started that I realized the error of my ways,” Thea said, blinking back the tears. “And what happened at the theatre was simply two people who I had believed cared for each other, expressing that caring.”
“I’m going to kill you, Joseph, if you’re upsetting my little sister!”
Thea turned as she heard the roar and watched Will stomp into the room. He looked from her to Joseph and then back to her, then crossed the room and hauled her into his arms.
“Hello, darling. Tough day?” His words were spoken into the top of her head and she gave up the fight and burst into loud, noisy sobs, clinging to him as if he were the only thing keeping her afloat in this sea of wild uncertainty. “Is he being an arrogant duke again?”
“I-I’m sorry, Will,” Thea managed to whisper into his chest. “I know you’re disappointed in me, too.”
“You have nothing to apologize for and never for one moment believe that there is anything you can do that would make me ashamed of you, Althea Ryder.”
He always knew the right words to say to her, this brother.
“You told me you would talk gently to her, try to make her understand the way things would be, but I arrive to find her in this state, Joe. I should give you a thumping,” Will growled. “She is still our sister, and I’m sure my crimes were far greater as were a few of yours,” Will added, rubbing his hand up and down her spine. “But as we are men, we are excused.”
“Will, please—”
Thea heard the sigh in Joe’s words.
“No, Joe. We vowed to love this girl with everything we have when our parents died
and support her, no matter the circumstances.”
Thea lay against her brother and cried. Her tears were for the young girl she had been, who believed in adventure and love, the one who slipped out at midnight to ride her horse across the fields of her home and stole her brother’s breeches so she could ride astride. She could no longer be that girl. She was to be married to a man who did not love her. Her life would now change completely, and these two men were no longer the ones who she would turn to for guidance and support.
“Oh God, Thea, can you forgive me?” She felt another hand on her head. “Will is right. I was so lost in my responsibilities and the fact that I believed in some way we had let you down that I pushed you away. Forgive me, love?”
She felt one of Will’s arms lift and soon she was being hugged by both her brothers. They stood there silently for a while until Joe eased away and Will released her.
“Dillinger is a good man, Joe, but I understand your fears as they are similar to mine, especially considering someone is trying to murder him.” This came from Will as he led her back to the seat across from his brother’s desk
and took the one beside her. “Even before I had dealings with him, Luke had told me he was a loyal and honorable man.”
“I know.” Joe pinched the bridge of his nose. “I had just hoped that if the King was taken then at least a Duke would do for my sister.”
Thea managed a smile for her brothers before she rose. “I’m so tired. Do you mind if I leave you two to discuss my fate?” They were so dear to her, these men, the best brothers a sister could ask for, and to think she would not see them as often as she wished nearly broke her heart.
“Livvy and Henry are here, Thea,” Will said as he walked her to the door. “Go and spend some time with them, love,” he urged, nudging her out the door.
She found them upstairs in her room. Henry slept in the middle of the bed with his mother, Bella’s oldest sister Olivia, beside him.
The Langley sisters had grown up in the same village as Thea. They had been friends for as long as she could remember, but Olivia, as the oldest—or Livvy as her family and friends called her—had taken on the role of Thea’s eldest sister and confidant when she had required it, and as she had no mother, it was to her and Penny that she would turn now. She was a beautiful woman, with her red gold curls and soft eyes, and seeing her made some of the anxiety inside Thea start to ease slightly.
“Livvy.” She walked toward the bed.
“Hello, darling.” Livvy got off the bed and hugged her hard, a real hug like her brothers had just given her. One that told her she was not being judged, just loved.
“I-I have made a mess of things, Livvy.”
“Well, now, Thea, I’m not so sure on that, my sweet. But why don’t we let Henry sleep and sit by the fire for a while and talk. Firstly, let me tell you that I have met Oliver Dillinger a handful of times and found him to be a good man, Thea. He is fair and kind, and according to Luke, there is none better,” Livvy said. “However, I have no idea if that means he will be a good husband to your or not, only that we will take steps to ensure you mold him into one.”