by Cate Corvin
Haru sighed. “Do you really want me to do this, Vyra?”
The succubus opened her mouth to say what was clearly going to be a yes, but three heads all snapped in Haru’s direction.
“Keep your hairy hands off her,” Lucifer said coolly, and Haru gave him a crooked smirk.
“They’ve spoken,” he told Vyra, brushing off his decidedly unhairy hands. “Nothing I can do here.”
She narrowed her eyes at me. “Melisande. Please. I promise you the healer is the most trustworthy demon we could find. He does not report to Satan in any way, shape, or form, and he’s not going to tell anyone what we do in here. All he cares about is making sure you’re not dying from some Elysian disease.”
I crossed my arms too, mimicking her pose. “Are we sure of that? What if-” I paused, hesitating to say my hidden fear aloud unless it somehow came true- “What if something is wrong with me? You can’t be sure he won’t report any weakness right back to the King.”
“Oh, we can be sure,” Belial said, with an edge to his amused look.
Tascius came up behind me and picked me up. “You’re going. No more fighting on this. Let me care about you for once, Melisande.”
“Using guilt trips is a dirty trick.” But I let him carry me inside, and even wrapped my arm around his neck.
“Sometimes you need to resort to underhanded tactics to get certain stubborn angels to do what you want.” Belial walked at our side, twining a finger through an errant lock of violet hair as Tascius carried me up the stairs.
“I’m perfectly capable of walking.”
“Not if you’re getting dizzy,” Tascius countered. “Just let him look at you. If nothing’s wrong, you can walk wherever you want. But if this something serious, we’re not exacerbating it.”
Instead of bringing me to the infirmary, he carried me to my room.
I almost clawed my way over his back and out the door when I saw what was waiting for me.
A demon whose head nearly touched the ceiling was waiting in there, looking like an overgrown octopus that’d somehow grown legs. Tentacles the color of ripe apples writhed under a set of long, dark robes.
“This is Healer Crisca,” Tascius said, pulling me back down. He got close to my ear and dropped his voice. “He’s not going to eat you. I swear.”
My heart was already racing.
I had no more flimsy excuses. Every fiber of my being revolted at the idea of those tentacles examining me, but Tascius’s hands were locked around my biceps, steering me towards the bed.
I sat on the edge, my back ramrod-straight, and looked up at Crisca.
The demon healer made a high-pitched noise that sounded like a pod of tormented dolphins shrieking, but Vyra, who’d pushed past Tascius, seemed to understand it perfectly well.
“He wants permission to touch you. He’s going to do the preliminary exam,” she told me. Her eyes narrowed to slits, waiting for me to fight back.
I nodded woodenly to the octopus demon. As soon as I’d given consent, two long tentacles that functioned like arms snaked out of the robes, and tilted my face up to the light.
I waited, patient but stiff, as Crisca pulled my lids down to examine the whites of my eyes, peered in my ears, and made me open my mouth so a tentacle with a tiny eyeball on the end could peer down my throat.
The entire time the demon was inspecting me, I kept my eyes fixed on the far wall, where everyone waited. Every single one of them looked tense. A line seemed permanently etched between Lucifer’s brows, Tascius had his arms crossed over his chest as he watched the healer warily, and Vyra was chewing her lower lip.
Belial was the one who broke away first, coming to sit next to me on the bed. I laced my fingers through his as Crisca’s tentacles receded for a moment. The demon squealed to Vyra.
“He wants you to lie down, then he’s going to take a drop of blood,” she translated. I hid my shudder and obeyed, just wanting to get it over with.
Belial scooted back so I could rest my head in his lap, keeping my fists clenched at my sides.
“I’m right here,” he whispered. He stroked my hair as the tentacles began prodding at my arms and legs, and one rested over my heart for a moment that felt like a year, presumably counting its beats. The tentacles weren’t actually as unpleasant as I’d originally feared; they were cool and surprisingly dry.
One of them rested over my lower stomach, and Crisca paused. A tentacle tipped with a bone-like needle jabbed into my arm and I jerked.
Belial gave the healer a narrow-eyed look, but I was speechless as the robes opened, revealing a beaked mouth, and the demon deposited the drop of blood on its tongue and clicked its beak a few times.
Crisca went totally still, and then the squealing started again.
“What if I’m dying?” I whispered up to Belial, sudden anxiety squeezing my chest like a vise. “I’m not ready to die. I have so many people I still have to kill.”
“You’re not dying,” he growled. “Whatever is wrong, someone in Hell can fix it-”
“Melisande.” Vyra’s voice was flat with shock, like it was coming from another person. “You’re not sick. You’re fucking pregnant.”
I was still looking up at Belial’s face, but I felt like I was falling again.
Right through the floor, through the abyss, my mind completely separate from my body.
Pregnant?
I licked my numb lips, searching for words, but nothing came out of my mouth. The anxiety that had been squeezing my chest before felt like a gentle hug compared to the sudden tightness now, the sickness roiling in my stomach, the cold wash of fear that crashed through me with tidal force.
Belial’s grip tightened as he looked up at Crisca, his pupils dilated to tiny points. “Whose?” he demanded. “Can you taste it in the blood?”
I’d never considered having children during Heaven’s breeding cycles. Of course I knew that there was a chance it would happen, especially now that I slept with four men on a regular basis, but even between two angels it took a while to ensure conception. There was a reason the breeding cycles lasted three months just to make sure the pair was fertile enough to manage it.
Crisca was still making noises, but I heard them from a distance, like the entire room was underwater.
“He says he’ll need to taste everyone’s blood to compare,” Vyra translated, her voice shaking a little. She was wringing her hands, her eyes glued to my stomach.
Belial held up his hand before she was even done speaking, and Tascius strode forward as well. Crisca’s needle-tipped tentacles jabbed them in their palms, and Lucifer finally stepped up and held out his hand.
I sat up and watched the demon taste their blood, clacking its beak and making little noises.
“It’s yours or mine,” Tascius said quietly, flicking a quick glance at Belial.
Lucifer’s shoulders stiffened. “It could be any of ours.”
For my part, I stayed silent, my mouth as dry as wasteland sand. A thousand emotions swirled through me like a storm, colliding with each other, some drowning out the others, but one overarching feeling remained: the complete and total fear of bringing a child into a world where my death was inevitable.
It was too soon. I squashed the bubble of happiness that threatened to rise. Deep down, there was a sliver of me that was dancing at the idea of two of us making a person who would be the best of both of us, but it was too dangerous to let that part celebrate now.
“The child is mine.” Belial shook his head. “I can feel it.”
Tascius scoffed, but the tension in his muscles was impossible to ignore. I couldn’t tell if he was nervous, or if he wanted the baby to be his. “You can’t feel it. We’re the most likely candidates, but I was with her before you.”
The Prince of Wrath just rolled his eyes. “Which means nothing.”
“You can both fuck right off when it turns out to be mine,” Lucifer said, but Crisca chittered, cutting him off. Vyra perked up even though she was still wring
ing her hands like she meant to break her fingers.
“He says…” The color left her cheeks. “He tastes the essence of Belial in her blood.”
Belial jumped up off the bed, pumping both fists in the air with a roar.
“What did I say?” he said, his face breaking into a wide smile. “What the fuck did I tell you?”
He dropped to the floor in front of me on his knees, running his hand over my lower belly before I could stop him.
His fingers were shaking. My lungs froze at the look on his face, the triumph and happiness in his eyes, and that small sliver that wanted to be overjoyed felt herself being pulled along into his whirlwind of joy.
“My baby… the heir of Wrath,” he said, looking up at me. The yellow stars in his eyes were brighter than ever, burning with his internal fire.
Tascius sat next to me, and Lucifer schooled his face into a neutral expression. I hadn’t missed the slight slump in Tascius’s shoulders or the look of disappointment that had crossed Lucifer’s face.
“It doesn’t feel real,” I finally whispered, hoping I didn’t fracture under the terror.
I couldn’t break now, whether I’d planned on children or not. If I was going to bring new life into Hell, I needed to do everything in my power to protect it.
A new fire I’d never felt before kindled in my chest. For once it wasn’t the fire of wrath, or vengeance, or anger.
It was a powerful, bone-deep need to be a shield against the world for the tiny little speck of life growing inside me.
“Is it a male or female?” Belial demanded, looking up at Crisca.
The healer squealed. “It’s too early to tell,” Vyra said. Some of the color was finally coming back to her face. “He says he can do another exam in about a month.”
Belial turned back to me, pulling me down into a deep kiss that sent fire flooding through my veins. He finally broke away, resting his forehead against mine, unable to stop grinning.
I felt Tascius rubbing my back, and to my surprise, Lucifer thumped Belial’s shoulder in congratulations. Whatever disappointment they felt was now veiled, but there was a tension growing in the room that only grew worse after Vyra paid the healer and escorted him out, leaving us alone.
“I can’t believe that I’m going to have a baby.” I pressed a hand against my belly as though I’d be able to feel it somehow, but I still felt just like… me.
Lucifer looked out my window at the destroyed garden and scowled. “First things first. We should spend more time on the Brightside.”
I opened my mouth to protest, but Belial was already on his feet and nodding in agreement. “It’s harder for Satan to interfere on the Brightside than on the Nightside,” he said. “You and the baby will be safer in the sunlight.”
I realized what the tension was: overprotectiveness. They’d somehow arrayed themselves around me in a defensive formation already.
Tascius rubbed a gentle circle on my lower back. “You’re not abandoning anyone,” he said. “We’ll come back when we have extra guards here.”
“No, we won’t.” Belial was already tossing clothes in a chest. “Just because they’re gone doesn’t make the Nightside safer, and I’m not gambling on my child’s life. We’ll come back if it’s necessary, and for no other reason.”
I took a deep breath, shoved the anxiety aside, and stood up. I strapped a pair of knives to my thighs and turned to see them watching me with varying levels of trepidation on their faces.
“Melisande…” Tascius said, watching me inspect a dagger. “I’d rather you not fight…”
“I see what you’re all doing, and I actually agree with you.” I tucked another knife into my arm sheath. “I’ll spend as much time on the Brightside as possible. But I’m not going to put down my sword and knives just because I’m pregnant. If anything, the baby needs someone who’s going to fight for them, and there’s no one better to do that than me.”
Belial handed me another dagger, his eyes dancing. “Spoken like the mother of my child.”
I tucked the dagger at my hip and swallowed the remains of my fear.
If I could survive falling from Heaven, I could survive this.
8
Melisande
“I need all of you to promise me something,” I said, planting my feet and crossing my arms.
Several Chainlings came in and took a few chests that the men had packed with my belongings, preparing to transport them to the Brightside arena. I’d put my foot down and insisted that they only take half; both arenas were my homes, and if I needed to abandon one for a time, the other would still be open to me.
Another group of Chainlings was already hard at work laying down fresh protection charms of iron and salt. Vyra had wasted no time in ordering them to scour every inch of the grounds after they’d ripped out the roses, and she’d already set up several shifts of guards who would do nothing but patrol the outside of the arena.
As for the fighters who’d come under my banner, they were hard at work training and joining the Chainling guardians on their shifts. I’d seen more than a few of them whispering to each other at the sudden surge of activity in my arena.
“What’s that?” Lucifer asked.
The four of us had grouped outside away from the commotion, and Tascius had spent ten minutes trying to convince me to ride Capheira to the Brightside instead of flying, but I refused. First of all, Capheira preferred the cool shadows of the Nightside, and second of all, I wasn’t going to start acting like an invalid just because my uterus was occupied.
One thing had occurred to me as soon as I’d taken a moment to catch my breath and examine my feelings.
In realizing the depths of my feelings and trust for all of them, I’d allowed my rage against the world to cool. I’d come to rely on them, depend on them, and most of all trust them.
I wasn’t sorry that I’d gained that trust, or that we felt like a team now.
But I couldn’t allow myself to be propped up on a pedestal like I was incapable of doing anything for myself. In six or seven months, I might be a mother, but I was still Melisande. Still a warrior. Still wrath incarnate.
And if this baby stood even the slightest hope of surviving past a year, I needed to remain as I was, willing to defend it with my life, with that fury burning inside me.
“I want everyone to keep quiet about this,” I said bluntly. “The moment everyone finds out, they’re going to start coddling me. They’re going to see me as weak and something to be protected.”
Belial’s eyes flashed and he opened his mouth, but I held up a hand, lifting my chin.
“Just because I’m going to be a mother doesn’t mean I’ve changed. I’m still a warrior, and I can still defend myself. I’m still going to do what we’ve planned. This changes nothing.” I kept my tone firm, drawing my line in the sand.
“It changes everything,” Lucifer said in exasperation. “Being defended isn’t being weak. You’re going to be the mother of our children, Melisande. An innocent soul is inside you. It only makes you more desirable to him.”
I didn’t need Lucifer to tell me who ‘him’ was. Of course Satan would probably find a Bride growing an innocent life a very tasty treat… but if he caught me, I’d make sure he choked on me all the way down, then cut him apart from the inside out.
A Chainling led Arcturus over to us, and Belial took the reins. I cast a glance at the beloved follower of mine, and steeled myself as he backed away with a bow.
There were too many listening ears around.
“Let’s discuss this in the sky,” I said tersely, and Belial mounted Arcturus. The flaming horse immediately leaped into the air, and the rest of us spread our wings and followed.
I felt bad for not trusting my Chainlings with my new secret, but if they were almost painfully worshipful before, finding out I carried the heir to Wrath would probably end up with me swaddled in a shrine and served hand and foot.
That was the last thing I needed right now. My fear could on
ly be alleviated through my own action. I tasted the wind as we rose, luxuriating in the feel of it in my feathers.
What would flying feel like in eight months?
I pushed the terrifying thought away and glided alongside Arcturus.
“I can be both a mother and a warrior,” I said to them all. “I am both. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate that you want to keep me safe, but I’m not going to back down.”
Tascius was overhead, his broad wingspan casting a shadow over those of us below. “You’re not fighting in arenas anymore,” he called.
“Nor are you to even think about going near Satan.” Lucifer scowled just at the thought of it.
Belial laughed. “You fight whomever you please, angry angel. I’ll have your back.”
I did love their overprotectiveness, truly. It made me feel cared for and wanted for the first time in my life, but I couldn’t lie to myself: I loved that Belial understood that inherent part of me that needed to stand and fight, no matter the circumstances.
“Not helping, Belial.” Lucifer glared at him, and banked towards the Brightside arena far below.
Tascius stayed between me and Lucifer, but I was content to fly alongside Arcturus. For once the flaming war-pony didn’t give me any shitty side-eye glances. Maybe he’d missed having an antagonist in his life.
He was perfectly happy to be released in his volcanic pasture, and even let me touch his nose before he trotted off to eat coals.
“He’s unusually pleasant today,” I said, and Belial wrapped his arm around my shoulders as he opened the arena.
“I think he missed having someone around who doesn’t cater to his every whim.”
I smiled up at him as we entered the cool darkness of the arena. “Are you talking about Arcturus or yourself?”
Belial leaned down as the doors closed behind Tascius and Lucifer. “Maybe both. I missed you being a pain in the ass all the time.”
“Good thing I don’t plan on stopping now,” I said, kissing him before the others called us down the hall.