by Alan Gibbons
‘Has Eve said anything?’
‘No, but you might be able to ask her yourself.’
‘She’s here?’
‘I wanted her to come in with us. She refused.’
‘I’d like to see her.’
Jess walked to the door.
‘I’ll ask.’
They left us alone to talk. It was strange seeing him there on the bed. His skin was ashen, his hair untidy. He looked more like a little boy than a teenager. I spoke first.
‘You finally did something.’
‘Better late than never.’
I let a raised eyebrow pass verdict on that comment.
‘Why?’ I asked. ‘Why last night?’
‘I don’t understand.’
I made it simple for him.
‘Why were you able to stand up for Oli when you couldn’t stand up for Rosie? What made you act for him and not for her?’
‘It’s complicated.’
‘I’ve got plenty of time.’
‘Will you hear me out?’
I nodded.
‘What happened in Cartmel Park, it’s like some crazy nightmare. Do you understand what I’m saying?’
‘I’m listening.’
He was struggling to make sense of my answer. Well, tough, I didn’t want to be there. Jess was the only reason I was even in the room. If this had to happen it was going to be on my terms, not his. He didn’t deserve any more than that.
‘I’d been living in fear for months. I was a basket case. Mosley had made me scared of my own shadow. That night . . .’
He rubbed away the tears that had started to come with a pyjama sleeve that was too long for his arm.
‘That night, when they attacked Rosie . . . Eve, for once it wasn’t me being hit. It wasn’t me being pushed around. It’s horrible . . . I hate myself . . . The reason I didn’t say anything is because, as long as they were picking on Paul and Rosie, no one was picking . . .’ He pounded his chest with his fist. ‘No one was picking on me.’
His eyes pleaded with me for a response. I stared him down.
‘I didn’t think she was going to die. Things like that don’t happen in real life, only in movies. People don’t get murdered for nothing, not here, not in a little place like Brierley. I thought . . . I thought she would have some bruises, that’s all.’
‘Liar!’
‘What?’
‘You’re a liar, Anthony.’ I didn’t want to hurt him. I wanted him to face the truth. ‘You could see what was happening. They kicked her in the head. They stamped on her again and again and again.’ I brought down my fist in time with the words. ‘You don’t come away from violence like that with bruises. Oh, you were glad it wasn’t you lying there on the floor, but don’t lie to yourself. You didn’t care what they did, so long as nothing happened to you. That’s it, isn’t it? You thought if you tried to protect her, you were going to get hurt. It was all about you.’
And that’s when he broke down.
‘Yes.’
My neck prickled.
‘What?’
‘Yes, Mosley turned me into a coward. I just didn’t want to get involved.’
His chin dropped onto his chest. I stared down at him for thirty seconds, a minute, maybe longer.
‘But you found it within you to save Oli?’
‘Yes.’
‘So you could have saved Rosie?’
His chest was heaving.
‘I suppose so.’
‘Could you have saved her?’
There was a pause of several seconds.
‘Yes.’
Without another word, I started to walk to the door.
‘Eve . . .’
‘I thought we were done talking.’
‘Eve please, I have to ask. I can’t live with myself. Is there any way you can forgive me?’
I half-turned.
‘You did something good when you fought to save Oli. Jess will do the forgiving.’
‘But what about you? You’re the one that matters. Can you forgive me?’
I completed the turn.
‘I’m not a priest, Anthony. I can’t give you absolution. Who am I to forgive anybody? I’m just as weak, just as ordinary, just as cowardly as you are. It’s not me you have to ask for forgiveness.’
‘So who do I ask? Eve, I can’t live with this pain.’
‘That’s what we all want, you, me, my mum and dad, but it isn’t possible. When they killed Rosie, they tore something out of all of us. You don’t get over it. They say it heals. I don’t believe that’s true. It’s been six months and I still can’t close my eyes without seeing them swarming over her, stamping on her. It doesn’t get better. It doesn’t heal. Time doesn’t make it go away. All you can do is find a way to carry on.’
‘But who do I ask for forgiveness?’
‘It’s you, Anthony. You have to do it. So tell me, can you? Can you look yourself in the mirror and forgive yourself?’
He continued to stare before finally hanging his head.
‘No.’
I continued to the door.
‘That’s your burden. I’ve spent six months trying to find a way to live with myself, Anthony. I think I’m about there now. Maybe one day you will find a way to forgive yourself. I wish you good luck.’ I opened the door. For some reason I started to laugh. ‘Do you know, I actually mean that. I want you to find a way back, but there’s nothing I can do to help. I’m not that good a person.’
When I closed the door behind me, Jess reached for my hand. Her eyes were bright with expectation.
‘Well, what happened?’
‘We talked.’
‘And?’
‘And nothing. Life goes on. We carry on the way we were. I’ll see you tomorrow, Jess.’
‘That’s it?’
‘That’s it.’
‘But what happened?’
‘If you’re looking for a happy ending, Jess, there isn’t one. We’re not little kids any more. It’s not the way things work.’
‘I thought at least . . .’
I patted her arm.
‘I know.’
She didn’t press me any further.
‘Do you want to come round to mine?’
‘Not tonight. I’ll see you tomorrow.’
I kissed her on the cheek. She was still trying to make sense of what I had told her. Things hadn’t turned out the way she imagined. I walked out of the automatic doors. Dusk was gathering over the hills. I ran my gaze along the brow and satisfied myself that, for the first time in months, there was nobody there.
READER’S NOTES
IN BRIEF
On 10 August 2013, Eve waved goodbye to her big sister Rosie and Rosie’s boyfriend Paul as they hopped on a bus. Six months later Eve’s life is dramatically different. Her big sister – a lively, passionate girl who dressed in goth clothes, wore her hair in dreadlocks, loved her family and had many issues she strongly believed in – was attacked in Brierley on her way from a party. She died in hospital.
Six months later, Eve is back at school. Her parents have separated, her mum spends much of her time campaigning for justice for Rosie, and her best friend Jess is trying to be a good friend and sometimes getting it wrong. On a normal February day, Anthony arrives at Eve’s school. She recognises him as someone connected with her sister’s death. He was in the park the night Rosie died.
Eve’s best friend, Jess, immediately develops a crush on Anthony, but is puzzled that Eve doesn’t seem to like this new, mysterious boy in their class. At home, Jess’s older brother Oli has decided to tell his parents that he is gay. Jess and her brother are close, and she promises to support him.
Anthony is finding settling into his new school difficult. He and his mum are living in fear of her violent and abusive ex-boyfriend. Anthony is tormented by memories of the night Rosie died, and the fact that he stood by as the attack took place. Eve is persuaded by her mum not to cause any kind of scene at school because she wants Anthony t
o give evidence at the upcoming trial.
Meanwhile, Anthony makes a friend, Charlie, with whom he shares a love of music. Charlie persuades Anthony to audition for the school talent contest. It is a busy term, with the school debate final also coming up. Oli is one of the finalist speakers, and the topic for debate is ‘Has political correctness gone too far?’ As part of the debate, Oli refers to his own sexuality, coming out to the whole school. Two bullies, Jake and Connor, react, picking on Jess. Emotions are running high, and Jess and Eve clash about why Eve is so cold towards Anthony. Jess finds out about his connection to Rosie’s death and promises to stand by her friend.
In the semi-final of the debate, Oli is the target of some mean and potentially embarrassing questions. He answers them well and, in the process, humiliates Jake and Connor. Eve is worried by this; her mum has warned her that Connor is part of the Hughes family, who have a reputation for violence.
Following Jess’s support of Oli, Eve feels as though she has let Rosie down by not even trying to put pressure on Anthony to give evidence at the trial. Her mum has been equally unsuccessful. With the final of the school talent show approaching, which Anthony stands a good chance of winning, Eve plans a way to take revenge.
At the trial of the gang accused of murdering Rosie, Anthony does not give evidence. Eve realises that the trial, on which she and her mum had rested so many hopes and invested so much energy, will never be able to give her an outcome that makes her feel better.
Following the trial, Eve and Anthony are back at school. There is a Year 11 parents’ evening and Jess, Eve and Anthony attend with their parents. Oli, as a sixth-form prefect, is helping out. At the end of the evening, Jess leaves with her parents, but Oli helps tidy up and has his scooter to get home on. Anthony and his mum are among the last to leave, and as they do, Anthony notices some men in a van watching Oli closely. He realises that the men are the Hughes family, and that Oli isn’t going to get away. Neither of them can.
Anthony wakes up in hospital with Oli and Jess there to thank him for trying to protect Oli. Anthony asks to see Eve and tries to explain his actions, or rather his lack of action, on the night Rosie died. He asks if she can forgive him. Eve says that her forgiveness isn’t the important thing; Anthony needs to be able to live with himself and forgive himself. She leaves the hospital feeling more at peace with the future.
FOR REFLECTION
Hate is an imagined story but the attack on Rosie and Paul has been drawn from a real-life attack. Sadly, hate crime is not as rare as we might imagine, in the UK and around the world.
When we read a novel like this, knowing how to process what we have read and how to think and respond to events like the ones in the story can be difficult. The following questions can be discussed with a friend or a book group, or could just be some ideas for you to think about.
• If you had to describe your identity and who you are in ten words, what would they be?
• Music is an important part of life for several of the characters in Hate. How important is music to you, your friends, and people you know? What things that are a part of popular culture can unite and divide people?
• How many groups can you think of that you belong to? Why do we join groups? Are humans drawn to feeling as if they need to belong to some kind of group? What ‘groups’ can you see in the novel, and why did the characters ‘join’ them?
• Family is important to all the characters in Hate, although the families themselves are very different. Do you think, overall, that Hate suggests that families are always positive groups to belong to?
• Which characters do you see as having things in common? In particular, which characters do you think have things in common with Anthony? In the story, Eve finds comfort in being in the great outdoors. Is there a place where you find it easier to think, reflect and to be honest with other people? Why is this?
• Do you think the reaction that Oli’s family had when he told them he was gay was a fair one? What reaction would someone receive in the groups you belong to if they told others that they were gay?
• ‘You think the battle against prejudice is won? We get lessons and assemblies on equal opportunities. Everyone pretends to be all PC. Are you telling me you’ve never heard a racist or sexist joke? You’ve never heard the boys comparing the girls’ boobs?’ Are these comparisons that Eve makes (racist jokes and comments about girls’ bodies) fair things to compare with homophobia and the sort of hate crime committed against Rosie and Paul?
• ‘Every word had drawn blood’. Do you think words or physical actions are more damaging? Which characters in Hate do you think would agree and disagree with you, and why would they agree or disagree?
• Who in the story can be seen as a ‘victim’? How would you define what we mean by a ‘victim’?
• ‘It takes a hell of a lot of people to do good. It only takes one or two to do evil.’ Do you agree with what Eve’s dad says here? Can you think of anyone who has done a lot of good by themselves?
• Lots of characters carry feelings of guilt in the book. Which characters feel guilty, and why? How do you think people can deal with feeling guilty after they have behaved in a way that they later regret?
• How did you feel towards Eve and towards Anthony at the beginning and end of the book? If you could ask each of them one question at the close of their stories, what would it be and why?
Following the murder of Sophie Lancaster, her family wanted to create a lasting legacy to their daughter and so The Sophie Lancaster Foundation was established and became a registered charity in 2009. To find out more visit www.sophielancasterfoundation.com
Stonewall’s Education for All campaign works to tackle homophobic bullying and help schools support lesbian, gay and bisexual young people. Their website contains a range of resources including research, teacher training guides, lesson ideas and interactive DVDs for pupils. www.stonewall.org.uk/atschool. The Young Stonewall website also contains specific advice and support for gay young people who might be experiencing homophobic bullying or having difficulties with issues such as coming out www.youngstonewall.org.uk
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Also by Alan Gibbons
An Act of Love
Blood Pressure
Caught in the Crossfire
The Dark Beneath
The Defender
The Edge
Julie and Me and Michael Owen Makes Three
Raining Fire
THE LEGENDEER TRILOGY
Shadow of the Minotaur
Vampyr Legion
Warriors of the Raven
THE LOST SOULS
Rise of the Blood Moon
Setting of a Cruel Sun
HELL’S UNDERGROUND
1. Scared to Death
2. The Demon Assassin
3. Renegade
4. Witch Breed
Copyright
AN INDIGO EBOOK
First published in Great Britain in 2014 by Indigo.
This eBook first published in 2014 by Indigo.
Copyright © Alan Gibbons 2014
Reader’s Notes complied by Laura Scott
The right of Alan Gibbons to be identified as the author of this work has been asserted by him in accordance with the copyright, designs and patents act 1988.
All characters and events in this publication are fictitious and any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted in any form or by any means without the prior permission in writing of the publisher, nor be otherwise circulated in any f
orm of binding or cover other than that in which it is published without a similar condition, including this condition, being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.
A CIP catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.
ISBN: 978 1 78062 177 7
Indigo
The Orion Publishing Group Ltd
Orion House
5 Upper St Martin’s Lane
London WC2H 9EA
An Hachette UK company
www.orionbooks.co.uk