by Fiona Starr
She climbs over me, straddling me, stroking me until I am fully hard. Then she presses herself onto me and she’s so wet that I slide in with ease.
“My god. Angus. My god.” Joely whimpers as we come together.
I pull her down so I can kiss her, plunging my tongue into her mouth, wanting to be inside her in every way. The feel of her body on mine when I have nothing to suppress my wolf is like a tidal wave of everything. The animal in me knows that she’s mine, and the man knows that I will do anything for her.
I roll us over and spread her legs wide, thrusting into her like we’ve only got this time left between us. It’s desperate and grasping and feels so fleeting, but at the same time its full and awesome and so intense it feels like it will consume us both.
Joely cries out as she comes, digging her fingernails into my back and clutching me with her legs. The sounds of her pleasure send me over the top, and I let myself go. I’m completely at her mercy.
We get dressed and sit next to each other on my bed. I’ve got my chain on again and I am wondering what she’s thinking. I don’t know what to say so I just play with her hands, trying to tell her how I feel with each little touch.
“I think you’re right. I should probably talk to Marco,” she says.
“Yeah,” I say, trying to imagine what my brother would say to all of this.
She searches my face, as if trying to nail down what I’m really thinking. “You sure you’re all right with this? I mean. I’m with you, Angus. I want you. But, I need to figure out what this is with Marco, too.”
I lace my fingers with hers. “Look. I know any other guy might be jealous or whatever. And I’m no saint, I think if it were anyone else, I might lose it. But it’s Marco. He’s my brother. And I’ll tell you something else. When he took you this morning, let you ride him back to the bikes? I felt two things. One was how empty I felt without you touching me. And the other was absolute confidence that you would always be safe with him. Always.”
She shakes her head. “I can’t believe this is happening.”
Chapter Six
JOELY
I stand on the front porch of the boys’ house, pressing my forehead against the heavy door, trying to wrap my mind around everything. Now that I know what I’m sensing, I can totally tell that Angus and Marco are inside. Marco still feels like he’s asleep, though this house is so big I can’t really pinpoint his location. It’s more like a feeling that he’s nearby.
And Angus… My goodness. When he took off his necklace, it was like a tsunami of Angus crashed into me, swept me off my feet, and carried me away. There’s no other way to describe it. The feeling isn’t an emotion, per se… it’s more of a vibe. But there’s no doubt that we are connected in a way I have never experienced with anyone ever before.
I have no idea if mages always feel this when they find the person they… they what? I have to stop myself because going down that rabbit hole feels like a new batch of heavy I just can’t handle at the moment.
Am I in love with Angus? I’m definitely falling but is that what that feeling is? It’s all too much. And if I am feeling this for Marco too, what the hell does that mean? Marco is wonderful and sweet, but I don’t know him the way I do Angus, so, maybe it doesn’t have anything to do with love at all. I feel like I should be relieved at that idea, but the thought is just a downer. My mind is a jumble of conflicting thoughts. Do I want this connection to be more than just some magical tether drawing me to these two men?
I blow out my breath and try to focus on what’s right in front of me. Because the moment I step off this porch and go back to the rest of my life, I am going to have to face my sisters, my parents, a pile of secrets, and a whole lot of other crap that I am not sure I can handle right now.
I squeeze my eyes tighter and focus. I can sense Angus moving around the back of the house, and I guess he’s in the kitchen, probably cleaning up after breakfast since we left in such a hurry. Angus's presence feels solid and heavy, grounded to the earth. I focus my attention upward, to the second floor where the floaty, airy sense of Marco emanates from. It’s incredible to be able to feel them like this.
Something else pushes into my awareness. It isn’t heavy like Angus or light like Marco, this one is soft and almost fluid. It wafts against the edges of my consciousness and I’m drawn to it like the others, but it’s new, and it feels… almost wary, tentative.
“Hey, Joely.” Van’s voice snaps me back to reality, making me jump. He’s sitting in one of the rocking chairs on the porch, facing me, his jaw rigid and serious as ever. “We need to talk.”
“You startled me,” I say, giving myself some time to get my bearings and trying to imagine what I looked like leaning against the door like I was. “You make a habit of watching people?”
He shrugs. “You seemed preoccupied. I didn’t want to intrude.”
“What do you want to talk about?” I try to play it his way. Polite without anything extra that might be construed as friendly.
He gets to his feet and stands facing me. At six-four, he’s a full twelve inches taller than me and I have to look up to see his face. “About today,” he begins. “I need to be sure—”
I try not to roll my eyes. It’s the only thing he ever spends time on me for. “Van, I get it. I can’t talk about this to anyone.”
“About what, exactly?”
“Really? What? Am I five years old? I think I’ve already proven that I can keep a secret.” And he knows it too. I haven’t said a word about seeing Mel’s dead body, even though the rest of the world thinks she’s still a missing person. And I did it for Van. Well, that isn’t entirely true. I did it for all of them. For Angus, and Marco, too.
“Humor me, Joely.” He tips his head and leans toward me. “Please?”
I sigh dramatically, fighting to ignore the way his woody citrus scent overcomes me. “Fine. I won’t tell anyone about Mel.”
“And?” He arches a brow at me.
“Really? I need to list all of your secrets I’m sworn to keep?”
“I’ll feel better if I hear you say it.”
I slam my hands into my hips. “I won’t tell anyone that you and your brothers are really here to kill Headmaster Underwood.”
“Good.”
“And I won’t tell anyone…” I pause as my mind latches on to the memory of the three of them in their wolf forms. My body heats up just thinking about the way I bonded with Angus and with Marco. My mind wanders and suddenly I’m curious to know if I would connect with Van in the same way if I rode him. His fluid nature is calming and gentle, nothing at all like the coarse, rude man he is on the outside.
I feel my face flush and have to force myself back onto my original train of thought.
“Yes?” Van asks, urging me on.
“I won’t tell anyone about the wolves.” My words come out as light as a breath. I’m lost in the memory of Van’s naked body and then the way he watched me until his wolf appeared. The way he nuzzled his snout against my neck before he took off into the trees. I clear my throat. “Good enough?”
He nods. “I know it’s a lot. But I’m still trying to work out how you fit into all of this. I thought your arrival would crack it open, but it hasn’t at all. And now that you’re here, everything feels obscured. It seems like your arrival has only complicated things.”
Ouch. The way he says it makes me feel small. “Thanks. I didn’t mean to complicate anything.”
“Well, you did. Just don’t say anything to anyone about anything, and we’ll be fine.”
I glare at him, trying to figure out what his problem is with me. “Look, Van. I know it’s important—”
He closes his eyes and runs his hands through his dark hair, looking like he wants to scream. “It’s more than just important. It’s vital. My brothers and I have been running from this man for our entire lives, waiting for the time to strike. He’s a monster in every way and he needs to be stopped. But we have to be careful. Do it right. We won
’t get a second chance.”
“I know. I wish you would trust me. Just a little. You have to know I would never do anything to hurt you or Angus or Marco. Never.”
“But that’s just it—any mistake wouldn’t have to be intentional. All it would take is one slip to the wrong person at the wrong time… Like the night of the initiation, if I hadn’t been there when you found that girl’s body…”
“That girl’s name is Mel,” I say, feeling righteous on her behalf. I didn’t know her well but she was my friend, and she didn’t deserve to die.
“Damn it, Joely! I know her name. She was Melody Carmichael. Age twenty-two. She had a sister, Hazel, and a brother, Ethan, both younger, still in primary school. Her parents are Silas and Charity, they work as solicitors for the Magical Ministry. You think I haven’t been trying to figure out why he chose her? I’ve been poring over everything I can find about all the missing students. Trying to find something that will make it all clear. Why does he kill students at all? Why does he choose the ones he chooses? It can’t be random, can it?”
“I… I don’t know.” I feel like an asshole. This is clearly weighing on him more than I realized.
Van stops talking and looks at me for the first time. “No. I’m Sorry. I shouldn’t have yelled at you. None of this is your fault. I’m just…” He blows out his breath. “I need you to understand. Really understand what we’re up against.”
Now I feel like shouting at him. But I don’t, because I want him to talk. I steel myself, and force my voice to remain level and calm. “How can I understand when you won’t tell me anything?”
He rocks back on his feet and leans against the house, his hands in his pockets. “Damon Underwood is a vampire, Joely. He and his two sons killed every member of our pack when the guys and I were kids. Little kids. The four of us were out running, like we did today. And when we got back…” He stares off into the distance, looking at nothing, his mind clearly on the past. “Forty-one people were slaughtered that night. But my brothers as I weren’t there. When we got back, he took us. He captured the four of us and used magic to keep us in our wolf forms. Back then, vampires used to keep normal wolf shifters as prisoners, slaves. Dire wolves are rare. He paraded us out like living trophies. For Underwood we were sport. They tortured us. Forced us to kill for them… He kept us in chains, kept us in our wolf forms for twenty-four years.” He sounds so angry, but under everything there’s pain. So much pain.
I try to imagine being trapped like that. Twenty-four years trapped as a wolf? I don’t know anything about shifters, but I can’t imagine that was easy. “Van, I’m so sorry.”
The anguish in his memory is palpable. The rage he’s kept bottled up pours from him as he explains.
Van blinks and looks at me as if he forgot I was here. “We killed his sons the night we escaped, and he’s been after us ever since. He’s never seen us in our human forms. He doesn’t know who we are as men. But we’ve been running from this monster since 1844.”
“Eighteen Forty-Four…” I feel as though I’ve had the breath knocked out of me. Angus told me how old they were, but hearing a year like this, one specific number dropped so casually, it kind of blows my mind.
Van continues, “Salma swore that the prophecy Tobias was trying to give us before he died was the key for us to end the hunt with Underwood. She was certain that we’d be able to put an end to him once it all came together. That we could finally stop running. The Nightbird has always been a big part of it. Tobias used his dying words to tell us about the Nightbird—about you. And now that you’re here it’s… it’s really frustrating not knowing what we’re supposed to do next.”
I feel like a jerk for pushing him, but I’m glad that I did, because now that he’s told me, it lends a bit of context to everything, even if I still don’t know why he seems to hate me. “I understand. Thank you for telling me. I’m sorry that I’ve made things worse. I wish things were clearer for you, I really do.”
He nods. “I do know one thing that’s perfectly clear.”
“What’s that?” I ask.
“One slip by any of us and Underwood will be onto us. And if that happens, we’re all dead.”
Chapter Seven
JOELY
I sit in my potions class unable to focus on anything. The mini cauldron in front of me is full of frothy pink goo with tiny bubbles that float up and pop audibly in the air. A quick glance at Roz’s cauldron tells me that one of us has made a mistake with our preparation of the recipe, and a look around the room confirms that it’s me. Shit.
Roz pokes her stirring wand into my pink mess. “Looks like evil bubble gum.”
I flip through the pages of my textbook, retracing my way through the recipe and it feels like I’m reading it for the first time. I have no memory of doing any of the steps. “What the hell?”
Professor Fester appears next to me like an apparition, her bright red hair coiled high on her head. “Miss Everstar, you appear to be having issues with your recipe. Can you tell by the contents of your cauldron where you made a misstep?”
I stare into the swirling pink, waiting for the answer, hoping it is going to reveal itself. It doesn’t. “No, Professor. Sorry. I don’t know where I went wrong.” Unless you consider the fact that my mind has been consumed by everything other than my classes for weeks. I mean seriously, from the moment my magic sparked, it’s like I’ve been on a rollercoaster with a blindfold and no guard rails.
The professor taps my textbook.“Step thirteen, add nine grains of powdered snake skin, three at a time, stirring constantly. Without this ingredient, added in exactly this way, your Elixir of Probitatis will end up like—” She leans over my cauldron and arches a brow at me. “—cotton candy that requires an exorcism.”
Snickers and whispers from the other students ring through the classroom. “I’ll do better, Professor Fester.”
She nods. “Potions is a fine art, Miss Everstar. It requires a delicate hand and much practice. See me before you leave, I have something that may help.”
“Yes, ma’am.” It doesn’t bother me that my classmates delight in my embarrassment. I know as well as they do that it could be them the next time. So, whatever.
Roz leans in. “Hey, what’s going on with you? You haven’t been yourself lately at all. Alice said you were having trouble in conjuring class too. Is everything all right?”
I know Alice means well, but damn if it doesn’t sting to know they’ve been talking about me.
She continues, “I saw you with Angus last night, so it’s clearly nothing to do with him. Is it your sister? Has she been on your case again? Or have you been able to talk to your mom about… you know…” She stops talking as if she’s trying to find a way to phrase this part of my personal drama.
I sigh. “You mean the fact that having Ancient Magic proves I couldn’t possibly be the child of both of my parents? Or that my dad hasn’t been seen or heard from since my magic sparked? Or that my sister blames me for ruining my parents’ marriage?”
Roz winces and I know I’ve gone too far.
I grab her hand. “I’m sorry. I have a lot on my plate. I know you’re trying to help.”
She squeezes to let me know I’m forgiven. “Don’t worry about it. I just want you to know that I’m here if you need anything. We all are. Winter and George too. You’re not alone.”
I could cry at how kind she’s being. “I got so lucky being assigned to the same dorm suite with you three. I don’t know what I would do without you guys looking out for me.”
She pulls me into a half hug. “We have to stick together, girlie. How else are we going to take over the world?”
I laugh with my friend, but inside, my mind is reeling. It rolls through all the things I’m carrying right now, most of which I can’t talk about. The life-or-death mission Angus and his brothers are trying to navigate scares me more than I want to admit.
I don’t like knowing that the person they are here to take down is strong
enough to kill us all. And I still haven’t talked to Marco about this thing that’s happening between us. With Underwood out of town all week, they’ve been busy taking advantage of the chance to do some digging.
Ever since Van opened up to me, he has been a tiny bit nicer to me, which is probably the only really good thing that’s come since they let me run with them as wolves last weekend.
But the other things are still at the top of my mind too. My mom hasn’t been taking my calls and she hasn’t answered my texts. My dad’s gone off the radar completely. The last time I spoke with my mom, things didn’t seem all right at home—not at all.
And then there’s Eliza and Kate. My sisters and I have never been close, but my being here has opened up a lot of questions. It’s one thing that I grew up my entire life without magic, only to have it spark suddenly and land me here, in their school, on their turf. But the fact that I’m here with the Society of Ancient Magic has revealed that my parents aren’t my parents. Magic runs through family lines, and neither of my parents, nor my sisters, have ancient magic. Eliza and Kate are both Elementals, like my parents, which can only mean that I’m not related.
I feel like there has to be a reasonable explanation for my family stuff. I mean, clearly, I am adopted. But why was it kept a secret from me all this time? Were they afraid I wouldn’t feel that they loved me? Or maybe they didn’t want me to try to seek out my biological parents?
My father’s last words before he left echo through my memory.
She was never supposed to be a mage.
He said those eight little words and then slammed the door in my mother’s face.
Part of me wishes I hadn’t been listening. Part of me wishes I didn’t hear what he said. Because those eight little words make it clear to me that not only is something not right, but that even if my mom is in the dark, my father definitely knows something about it.