Faded Dreams

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Faded Dreams Page 10

by Kari Lemor


  Gathering their coats, they traipsed back to the waiting room and snagged a few empty chairs. “Luke, you don’t have to wait with me. You probably need to get to work. It’s your first week back.”

  “They know I won’t be in this morning. It’s fine. I thought I’d look up those classes the doctor mentioned. You haven’t signed up for any yet, have you?” He scrolled through his phone, tapping keys here and there.

  “Not yet, no. I can do it later. Did you want to go to them with me?” Please, say yes.

  Luke set his phone on the table and twisted until he faced her. He cupped her cheeks and pressed a quick kiss on her lips, then kept his face right near hers. “I just heard our baby’s heartbeat, Ellie. It was the most incredible thing I’ve ever experienced. More than anything, I want to be with you every step of the way.”

  For the moment, Elle could almost believe Luke really meant it.

  Chapter Ten

  Luke roamed through the furniture store, overwhelmed with how many different styles and colors there were just for couches. When you threw in the entire living room set, it boggled the mind.

  “Did you have any specific kind of furniture in mind, Elle?”

  Elle bit her lip and rested her hand on her stomach. In the three weeks he’d been back, it seemed her belly had gotten bigger. Stupid thought. Of course, it was bigger. The baby was growing. His head still had a difficult time latching onto the fact his child rested inside her. Seeing the ultrasound pictures and hearing the heartbeat a few days ago had helped. When she took his hand and let him feel the baby kick and roll, he couldn’t even describe his emotions.

  “Not really. I hadn’t planned on buying furniture. Are you sure we can’t just use my stuff? It would save us a lot of money.”

  “The Victorian is huge. We can put your couch in that back room near the kitchen and use it for a den or office. Your bedroom set can go in one of the bedrooms, but it wouldn’t hurt to have another bedroom with furniture in it. Your dinette can go in the kitchen, but we need something bigger for the dining room.”

  “Why? Are we planning to start hosting your entire family? With a new baby, I’m not sure I’ll be up for that.”

  He took her hand and squeezed. “No, we don’t have to start having big parties. I just thought it would be easier to get the rooms filled and decorated now than after the baby comes. If you’re not up for that, I can ask my cousin, Sofie. She’s an interior designer. She helped Gina redo the house with all fixtures that match the time period of the house.”

  “No. It’s not that I wouldn’t love to help decorate. Filling a house that large will be a big expense.”

  “Don’t worry about the money. I make a good salary, plus I get my National Guard pay as well. And if you aren’t paying rent, we’ll have your entire salary for a few more months. Unless you wanted to stop working now.”

  Her head tipped to the side, and she frowned. “Why would I stop working?”

  Luke shrugged. “I don’t know. It just dawned on me that you might be getting tired and worn out at work. I’d be okay if you wanted to start your leave right now.”

  Her mouth tightened. “I only get a twelve-week paid leave. I don’t want to start it twelve weeks early. Then, what happens when the baby arrives?”

  He gazed down at their hands still entwined. “You don’t have to go back to work after if you don’t want.”

  Tugging her hand from his, she stiffened. “I worked hard to get my degree and be accepted at my job as a competent engineer. I’m not giving it up that easily.”

  Luke sighed. He hadn’t meant to make her mad. “That wasn’t my intention. I just want to make everything easier for you, Ellie. I’m sorry. Whatever you want to do, we’ll do.”

  “I’m not quitting my job. That’s where my health insurance comes from. I need that for the doctors and hospital expenses.” She spun and stalked off toward the bedroom sets.

  Crap. This wasn’t getting on her good side like Alex and Greg had suggested. He wanted to remind her if they got married, she’d be on his insurance and wouldn’t have to worry about her job. Yet he understood how hard she’d worked to get where she was, and he didn’t need to throw any old-fashioned ideals at her like she needed to stay at home with the baby. Even though he hated the idea of his child being in day care all day.

  Following behind, he carefully watched as she checked out each bedroom set. The price was always the first thing she’d look at. While he certainly wasn’t a millionaire, since he’d been sharing living space with Alex for years, his rent had never been much. His other expenses were mostly going out to eat or quick weekend getaways. Never anything outrageously priced. He wouldn’t be doing the weekend getaways any longer.

  “What do you think about the bedroom sets? Do you have a favorite?”

  She peeked at him and shrugged. “You should probably pick it out. I like my bed and have my mattress all broken in to my shape.”

  Hopefully, it would be okay for him, too. “Greg said he’d be happy to help us move some of your furniture tomorrow in his truck. Are you about ready for that step yet?”

  Elle heaved a big sigh. “I guess. I suppose I can still go back and forth and bring stuff over from my apartment for a few more weeks. I’ve already paid the rent for March.”

  “Did you give your landlord your thirty days’ notice?”

  Elle’s gaze lifted and searched the store. “Not yet. I wanted to make sure this was actually going through before I told him.”

  Placing his hands on her shoulders, he pressed a kiss to her forehead. “I want you in my life, Ellie.”

  “Because I’m carrying your child?” Her soft voice sounded petulant.

  “Because I care about you. And yes, because you’re carrying my child. They aren’t mutually exclusive. You don’t have to worry about needing your apartment again. We can move into the house as soon as we want.”

  Her eyebrows rose. “Like tomorrow?”

  “Yes. I’m excited about being able to see you every day, Ellie.”

  “I’ve started packing my stuff. My summer clothes were already in bins and a bunch of my pre-pregnancy clothes I’d stuck in bags because my closet is so small. That’s one advantage to moving. Gina’s house has lots of closet space.”

  His fingers, still on her shoulders, squeezed. “Our house. Very soon it will be our house. Thank you for agreeing to move in.”

  Elle glanced around the empty store, then took a deep breath. “I do have one rule for living there.”

  “Whatever you want.”

  “You aren’t ever to bring any of your lady friends to the house. Even if I’m not there.”

  Luke’s internal temperature soared, and his muscles tensed. “What are you talking about?” His voice was low but dangerous. “You’re having my baby, and you think I’m still going to go out carousing?”

  Elle’s face stiffened. Her eyes narrowed as tears welled up inside. “A leopard can’t change his spots.”

  She spun on her heel and marched past the bedroom sets. Not before he saw her lip quiver and a few of the tears fall down her cheeks.

  Shit. This was going to take some work to get her to understand that he was devoted to her. It didn’t seem to matter if he told her. The fact was, his past was so screwed up and filled with quick and easy sex, she couldn’t just put it behind her. It totally sucked that he had to prove himself to her. Anger bubbled up, then the memory of her tears deflated him. Greg and Alex were right. He’d worked too hard on his playboy reputation, and it had bitten him in the ass big time. Just like his brother had told him it would.

  Yet Elle was worth it. Worth all the time it would take to convince her he meant what he said about sticking by her and their child. He just hoped it didn’t take forever.

  Elle followed Luke up the stairs, the smaller box in her arms. Luke was carrying a large plastic container of her clothes, ones she hoped she’d fit back into after the baby was born.

  At the top of the stairs, he stopped
and rested the container on the newel post, waiting for her to catch up. She wasn’t moving as fast as she used to.

  “I didn’t ask before, Luke. Which room is mine?”

  “Yours?” His eyebrows scrunched together. “You mean ours? I thought we’d take the largest bedroom. The one right next to the baby’s room we talked about.”

  “Our bedroom?” No. No, no. That wouldn’t do. Living in the same house as Luke would be hard enough. Sleeping in the same bed? Impossible.

  “You want your own room?” His voice got husky and deep, not in a sexy way.

  “We aren’t a couple, Luke. A one-night stand doesn’t make for a great relationship. I agreed to live together for the sake of the baby and so you can be there for him. I never said anything about continuing with a physical connection.”

  Luke’s jaw tightened. He set the container down and pushed it toward the main bedroom with his foot. Then, he took the box she’d been carrying and dropped it on top of his. Elle waited for his next move.

  Taking her hand, he guided her into the baby’s room and sat next to her on the window seat. “I know we hadn’t been a couple before I left, but I thought we were friends, too.”

  The pain on his face made her heart ache. “We are friends, were friends…well, to a point. Let’s face it, I didn’t hang out with your group in high school. I didn’t hang out in any groups in high school. Not too many people wanted a little kid as their bestie.”

  “I’m sorry. I know it must have been difficult, but I always thought the world of you.”

  Elle laughed. “Enough that you charmed our science teachers into making us lab partners.”

  “See? I was thinking of you, even back then.”

  Elle cocked her head. “Yeah, you liked me for my huge brain and the fact I wasn’t lusting after your hot bod, so we’d get some work done.”

  Luke’s eyes gleamed, his grin emphasizing his dimples. “Are you lusting after my bod now? You obviously thought it was hot.”

  “I was a kid. I had no idea what lust even was.”

  He raised an eyebrow. “But you liked me, right?”

  Why did he seem insecure now? The Luke Storm from high school had more confidence than anyone else she’d ever met. Currently, he was staring at her like her answer was vital to his wellbeing.

  “Yes, I liked you. You were one of the only people in high school who actually spoke to me or treated me like I wasn’t a freak of nature. I know it was only so I’d help you with your work, but it was still sweet.”

  Luke’s face softened, and he pressed his lips to hers briefly. “I didn’t only talk to you so you’d help me with my work. You have a great personality, Ellie. You’re smart and witty. You’re also someone who listened when I had a problem. And not just a school problem. You helped me get through some pretty major decisions at that time.”

  “Like how you could get Mr. Delfina to give you back the note Gretchen Colby dropped on your desk? The one with her phone number on it? Possibly even what she’d do to you beneath the bleachers at the football game?”

  “How did you know about that note?”

  “No one pays any attention to the little tweenager. I pulled it out of the trash can and read it. Granted, I had no idea what some of that stuff even meant.”

  His dimples flashed her way. “Do you now?”

  “I don’t remember what it said, other than you were doing it while the band was on the field.”

  “And you never said anything. See? That’s what was so great about you. Any other friend would have razzed me about it for months. I would have had an audience if they’d known what Gretchen was planning. You know, if you’d shared the note with a few others, they might have treated you better. Invited you into their little groups.”

  “Sure, they would have. For a while and only if I continued to provide them with gossip fodder. That’s not me, Luke, and you know it. I don’t ever want friends that way.”

  Luke’s arms encircled her. He reeled her in until she rested against him. “That is what made you such a great friend. Maybe we didn’t hang out at the gazebo after school or go to the movies together. But I trusted you, Ellie. I knew I didn’t have to watch my back around you or keep my opinions to myself. I could be vulnerable and tell you what I was worried about. I knew it wouldn’t end up as the school’s newest dirt.”

  “So, I wasn’t just the annoyingly smart lab partner and study buddy?”

  “Never. I enjoyed your company, Ellie. I still do. More so than ever. “

  Heaving a huge sigh, Elle relaxed in Luke’s arms. “I enjoyed being with you, too.”

  “Because I have a hot bod?”

  Elle groaned and elbowed him. “No, because you were nice to me and treated me with respect and dignity.”

  “So I wasn’t a complete dickhead?”

  “You had some redeeming moments.”

  “Maybe I can have some more right now.” He framed her face and lowered his mouth to hers.

  This wasn’t fair. She couldn’t fight against his kiss and his touch. It was one of the reasons she knew sleeping in the same bed with him was a massive mistake. For now, she’d take every second of his lips against hers.

  As Luke caressed her face and nibbled his way down her cheek to her neck, the tone of his phone sounded. With a sigh, he eased back, dug it from his pocket, and swiped across the screen.

  “The furniture truck is at the end of the street. They’ll be here in a second.”

  Elle tucked her hair behind her ears, then pressed her hands on the seat to get up. Luke was right there, helping her. Her immediate reaction was to tell him she was perfectly capable of standing, but after the moment they’d just shared, she couldn’t bring herself to do it.

  “Thanks.”

  The truck had the baby furniture on board. Luke had her stay in the room to show them where each piece went, while he directed them up the stairs. The workers were quick and efficient and had everything assembled in less than an hour.

  Once they were gone and had removed all the packing, she and Luke stood in the doorway, gazing at their new baby’s room.

  “If we knew the sex of the baby, we could have bought some bedding and other stuff to go in here.”

  “Why? Because little boys can’t have pink or little girls can’t have blue? I seem to recall you had a favorite pink shirt you wore at least once a week. Usually when you wanted to get a girl’s attention.”

  Luke chuckled. “I guess you’re right. It doesn’t matter. But we should decide which bedroom you’ll be using. The big one is closest to the baby and would be easier when you have to feed him. Unless you weren’t planning to breastfeed. I never asked.”

  Elle’s heart skipped a few beats that he was actually asking. Some people would just assume and not take her choice into consideration.

  “I thought I’d definitely try. I have a friend from college who really struggled with nursing, because the baby couldn’t latch on very well. It seems the infant has to learn how to do it, too.”

  He curled his arms around her and pressed his nose into her hair. “I’ll help you in any way I can. Obviously, I can’t nurse the child, but I can make sure you’re comfortable when you do. And I can give him bottles if you get too tired.”

  “We’ll have to make those decisions when the time comes. Not right now.”

  Luke accompanied her to the main bedroom and had her check everything out. “Are you sure I can’t talk you into letting me stay in here with you? We wouldn’t have to do anything intimate if you didn’t want to. I just really thought we’d at least be sleeping in the same bed.”

  His sad tone almost had her giving in. But even across the room from her, his presence still affected her so much. Made her want things she knew she couldn’t have.

  “I’m not ready for that, Luke.”

  He strode toward her in two steps and peered down at her, his expression serious. Then, he knelt at her feet. Oh, no. Not again.

  “Please, Ellie. Will you marry
me?”

  All she could do was shake her head, tears too close to the surface, likely to fall if she attempted to speak.

  With an exhale, Luke stood and ran his hands down her arms. “Do you think there might ever come a time you’ll consider it?”

  It took all her willpower not to jump into his arms with a rousing yes. All she managed was, “Maybe.”

  As he pressed in to kiss her, he said, “Then, I’ll make sure to keep asking.”

  She was doomed.

  Chapter Eleven

  Luke steered the Camaro into the driveway and parked it behind Elle’s sedan. He’d offered to drive her to and from work today since they both worked in Portsmouth, but she wanted to have her own vehicle. In case she needed to run any errands, she’d said.

  He wasn’t going to push it as she’d finally agreed to move in. Now, if only he could convince her to sleep in the same bed and marry him. The flowers and food he’d picked up on his way home would hopefully work toward that goal.

  Home. This was now his home with Elle. God. The feeling coursing through his body was new and awkward, but he liked it. Along with the knowledge that his child would grow up in the same wonderful neighborhood that he had. Next door to family.

  Alex and Gina had gotten married last year and would most likely have kids. Greg and Ali already had Ryan and Jillian, but Greg had let slip that they wanted a child together as well. So perhaps there would be several playmates next door for their child to hang out with. The thought filled him with a giddiness he didn’t ever remember having before.

  After retrieving the bouquet of roses and the bag of food from the passenger seat, Luke climbed the front steps and let himself in. To his house. Okay, they hadn’t signed papers yet, but this was the first time he lived in a place that wasn’t rented or owned by his parents or brother. At the age of twenty-eight, it was about time he grew up and joined the adult world.

  “Ellie?” No sound came from downstairs. After entering the kitchen, he placed the food and flowers down, then found one of the vases from a few weeks ago when he’d filled the house with flowers. The day Elle had agreed to at least move in. Most of those flowers had died, so now they owned a few dozen vases.

 

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