Just before he walked out of the door, Christian slipped me a credit card and whispered in my ear to go crazy. Stark raving crazy or he would be disappointed in me.
I looked down at the card. It had my name on it. I looked up and he winked at me. I didn’t know about stark raving crazy, but we were definitely going to have some fun as Annie was outgrowing some of her clothes and I was sure she could use an update.
I got myself and Annie ready for our girls’ day out then we drove to the mall.
Annie was so excited she took my hand and practically dragged me through the entrance. She was surprisingly strong. We stopped in front of the toy store and Annie's eyes went wide as she took in all the possibilities.
"Clothes first," I reminded her. "And then toys."
"Aww, can't we do toys first?"
She looked super cute and I was sorely tempted, but I knew what would happen if I let her have her way. We'd be in the toy store all day and then she wouldn't feel like shopping for clothes. It was enough to make me want to cave, but I straightened my spine and shook my head. "Toys after. Come on, don't you want new clothes? I'm sure there are some cute PJ's too."
"New PJ's?" she asked curiously.
"Yeah, the kind with animal ears and tails."
"Cool beans!"
I laughed as she swiftly abandoned the idea of toy shopping for new clothes. At least, I could redirect her when I needed to.
We walked into a kiddie store and her eyes lit up as she led me over to one of the racks. "Look at this dress. It's so cute!"
I smiled as I pushed through the rack. "I like this one better."
We went through the clothes together and pulled out things we liked. I draped them over my arm one by one before I went back to rummaging in the racks. By the time I glanced up, I was sure we were going to spend a fortune. "Annie, we need to try some of these things on to make sure they fit. I think we should. Annie?"
I glanced around. She had been right by my side the whole time, but now she was just gone. My heart started to race as I turned around and started to look around for her. I peeked between the racks and around the store, but I couldn't find her.
"Annie? Annie!"
I threw the clothes over my arm on the floor and scrambled frantically as I tried to find her. I ran around the store in a panic, but I couldn't see her. I ran out of the store and started to look for her. She was nowhere to be seen.
I ran up to one person after another. "Have you seen a little girl in a pink top with a yellow elephant on the front and blue jeans?"
No one had seen her.
The mall was full of people and I couldn't see her anywhere. Tears sprung to my eyes as I moved through the wide space. I could tell I was unraveling. This was the worst thing that could possibly have happened.
Pull it together for Annie.
I forced myself to keep moving. I needed to find her now. Oh, God. Oh, God. I need to find a security guard. They have cameras.
I needed to call the police right away. If someone had taken her then the sooner I called, the better. I dug into my pocket and pulled out my cellphone when my ears picked up a familiar sound.
Annie's little voice calling to me.
"Come on, Annie. Let's go."
I whirled around and my eyes landed on Daphne. What the fuck? She was dragging Annie through the mall and frowning furiously. Annie looked like she'd rather be anywhere, but by her mother's side.
I stalked up to them and crossed my arms in front of my chest. "Daphne," I said sharply. "What are you doing? Annie's supposed to be with me."
The woman looked me up and down. "Oh? I didn't know I needed permission to have access to my daughter." She laughed. An ugly sound. "Besides, you obviously can't do a good job at keeping an eye on her. What were you thinking letting her wander off like that?" She lifted her chin at me.
I bristled with annoyance. It was clear to me that she had taken Annie away on purpose. Probably just to watch me squirm and have something on Christian about the way Annie was being taken care of. "Annie, come here," I said and held out my hand.
Immediately, she yanked her hand from Daphne’s grip and ran to me. Slipping her hand into mine, she pressed her body against me.
I gave her hand a little squeeze to let her know that everything would be okay. If Annie hadn't been standing there, I knew I would have yelled at Daphne for pulling such a stupid stunt, but I didn't want to upset Annie.
"I have things to do anyway," Daphne sniffed. "You can take her home."
I was going to do that anyway, bitch.
In my life, I tried not to think badly about anyone, or talk badly about them, but honestly Daphne was in a league all on her own. I could see the way she used Annie to try to get what she wanted and it made my stomach turn. "Thanks," I said sarcastically.
"I heard about you," Daphne called after I started to turn to leave. "Gabriel told me all about how you and Christian were at the party. How close you were."
"And?" I snapped.
"And I want you to know that you're nothing. You stay the hell away from Christian or there will be serious consequences."
I scoffed. "Are you threatening me?"
"Threatening? No. I'm telling you exactly what's going to happen if you decide to keep going after Christian."
Before I could say a word, she turned around and stalked off on her high heels as if she'd just done something great.
I gritted my teeth. How could anyone be that awful? I didn't get why she was so focused on Christian when he clearly wanted nothing to do with her.
I glanced down at Annie. "Do you want to pick up some lunch and go home?" I asked quietly.
Annie nodded. She still seemed to be a bit dazed. "Yeah," she whispered. "I want to go home."
I took her hand as we headed for the exit to the mall. She refused to let go of my hand the entire time and I kept glancing at her to make sure she was okay.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Hannah
The drive home was quiet for once.
Annie didn't talk my ear off. Instead, she stared ahead and kicked the back of the seat quietly. For such a young child, it was easy to see there was a lot on her mind. I wanted to say something to comfort her, but I felt like I should hold back and wait until she was ready to come to me.
We pulled up to the house and I helped her out then we slipped inside. As soon as I shut the door behind us, she turned around and hugged my legs tightly.
I quickly crouched down and pulled her into my arms.
She squeezed me harder.
"I wish you were my Mommy," she sniffled and buried her face in my shoulder.
My heart clenched. I didn't want to say the wrong thing, but I could understand why she didn't want Daphne to be her mother. She constantly used her and threw her away when it didn't serve her. It made me so angry. Annie was such a special child and to not be fully appreciated by her mother hurt.
"It’s okay, sweetie," I whispered quietly as I stroked her hair.
"Can't you stay with Daddy and me forever?"
My eyes watered and I knew I was close to bawling my eyes out, but I couldn't stop myself. I loved being around Annie. She was the light I needed to be happy, even if Daphne didn't see that. I didn't plan on going anywhere, but I knew that wasn't up to me, and I couldn’t feed her false hope. "What do you say we go get all cleaned up and then we watch something together, hmm?" I asked after I'd wiped my eyes quickly. "Does that sound good?"
Annie looked at me sadly but she didn’t push it. Just nodded.
I knew this was as good as it could be at the moment.
We ended up relaxing on the couch and even eating dinner there. She fell asleep on my lap as I stroked her hair and stared at the TV without really watching it.
"Hey."
I glanced up at Christian in the doorway. "Hey," I whispered. "She's out."
"I see. Sorry, I'm late I had a meeting run really long. Is everything okay?"
I shook my head a little. "Can
we talk? After you put Annie to bed?"
Christian nodded and gently lifted her from my lap then took her upstairs.
I followed behind.
He settled her into the bed and tucked her in.
She mumbled in her sleep, clutched her pillow, then was completely out of it again.
We both slipped out of the room and Christian shut the door behind him. Then we walked into his room and only once that door was closed did I finally sag and allow how much the whole thing had bothered me to take over.
"What's wrong?" Christian asked as he gripped my shoulders and gave them a squeeze.
"We ran into Daphne at the mall. And by ran into I mean she lured Annie away just to see me lose my shit. And then when I caught up with them, she warned me to stay away from you or she's going to... I don't know come after me, or something," I cried, tears gathering in my eyes and rolling helplessly down my face.
“What?”
“I was so terrified. I thought she’d been taken by a pedophile. Oh, my God, Christian you don’t know how afraid I was! It was the most frightening feeling in the whole world. I would rather have Gabriel rape me than feel that again. I don’t know what she is going to tell you, but I swear I wasn’t careless with Annie. I love Annie with all my heart.” I couldn’t speak anymore and I began to sob like a baby.
"Fuck. She’s such a bitch," he spat.
“You believe me?”
He put his hands on either side of my cheeks. “Yes, I believe you.”
I felt a little better.
"You know I'm going to protect you no matter what, right?"
I nodded. "Yeah, I remember," I said as I reached up and covered his hands with my own.
"I'll have a chat with her, so don't worry anymore, okay? I know how to handle her."
I nodded. "Okay.”
“You feel better now?”
“Yes, but I’ve got something else to get off my chest.”
“Go on.”
I sniffed. “Annie said something kind of funny today and I didn't know how to respond."
"What did she say?"
"She wished I was her Mommy and she wanted me to stay here forever," I said, glancing up at him. "I didn't know what to say. I don't want her to hate her mom, so I didn't say anything negative, but I couldn't think of anything positive to say either. It just felt like bullshit on my tongue, and I couldn't lie to her. Why are you smiling?"
"You did well," he said. "You can't lie to a kid. They'll pick up on it in an instant."
I pursed my lips. "Well, I'm glad then that I did the right thing."
“You did well not to lie to her.”
I relaxed a little at his words. At least I knew I hadn't screwed her up for life in some way. As much as I knew how to be a nanny, I'd never been a parent. And I'd never had anyone tell me they wished I was their mother. It was surreal.
Christian stroked my cheek.
I then put my focus back on him. That weird smile hadn't left his lips and I stared up at him confused. What was going on inside his head? "What?" I finally asked.
"Would you like to be my girlfriend?"
Chapter Thirty
Hannah
I stared at Christian like he’d lost his mind.
I heard the words but it was like my brain couldn't process them. His girlfriend? He wanted me to be his girlfriend? I couldn't make sense of those words in my head so instead, I stared and stuttered, “U-umm…”
Christian chuckled underneath his breath. "Are you going to say something?"
"I'm not really sure I know how words work anymore," I mumbled. I didn't think he would ever want me to be his girlfriend. He'd made it clear right from the start that he didn't want a real relationship and as much as I'd hated it, I also knew I couldn't force him into anything. So, to hear him say that he wanted me to be his girlfriend completely floored me. "Are you serious?"
"Very serious," he said as he took my hands.
"How do you feel about me?" I asked.
Christian's thumb caressed my cheek. "I feel things for you that I've never felt for anyone before," he said. "Not for Daphne, not for anyone. So I want to give us a shot. We deserve that much. What do you think?"
I smiled up at him. Of course, that's what I wanted. All I'd ever thought about when it came to him was how much I wanted to be in his life. And Annie's. I adored both of them so much I couldn't imagine being without them. "I think that's the best idea you've ever had. Well, besides the one where you asked me to sleep with you.” I laughed nervously. “Of course, I want to be your girlfriend."
Christian's smile grew until he looked happy enough to burst. He palmed my cheeks and swooped down on my lips. The little peck turned into a wildfire. Our lips moved together hard, our breaths whipping into fast pants. His hands moved first and yanked my clothes off as I went for his.
The terrible tension I'd felt all day disappeared when he was holding and touching me like he just couldn't get enough. I moaned against his lips as his tongue slipped into my mouth. He explored and tasted me until I couldn't stand it anymore. I wanted to feel him, every inch of him.
I pushed him hard onto the bed and he fell back in surprise. I chuckled as I licked the crease of his neck and nipped at it with my teeth. That drew a long, passionate moan from his mouth and I wanted to hear it again and again.
He chuckled. "Did you want me that bad?"
"You have no idea."
I couldn't imagine not wanting Christian. His hard, muscled body pressed against mine was something that I could never get enough of. My fingers scraped down his chest, long and slow as he arched his back and pressed up into my hands. He trusted me, that much was clear and he wanted me like no other. I couldn't imagine being with anyone and having them want me the way he did. It was deeper than anything I'd ever had before.
"Hannah," he groaned.
"Shhhh." I kissed down along his chest over his belly and between each of his muscular thighs. The scent of his arousal was strong and heady. It drew me in and made me want to climb on top of him and ride him until I'd had my fill and then some. Instead, I slid my tongue over the insides of his thighs and over his balls.
Christian sucked in a breath. I glanced up at him and he locked eyes with me. I let my tongue drag over his flesh before I sucked one ball and then the other into my mouth.
His body bowed and he tensed. "Hannah," he managed to choke out.
"Not done yet," I said as I released his balls and dragged my tongue back up his extremely rigid shaft.
"You're being greedy tonight. Does this mean you're happy?"
"Mmhmm…" I moaned. "Very happy." I opened my mouth and swallowed the whole of his cock before he could say another word. The only sound I received was a deep moan and that was more than enough to make me grin inwardly and slide my mouth downwards until he was nestled neatly in my throat. I swallowed around him, my throat constricting and tightening as he threw back his head and bucked upward into my throat.
The more he bucked, the more I swallowed and moaned while my fingertips massaged his balls. Until I was sure he was going crazy. He was on the edge and ready to explode, but every time he came close, I pulled away and started all over again. I wanted him right on the edge of the razor blade, and I wanted him to feel as good as I did hearing him say that he had feelings for me.
My body was in overdrive mode.
Heat swept over me and I was so wet I could feel it dripping down my thighs. I crawled up his body and straddled his lap as I glanced down at him.
Christian reached up and grasped my breasts, tweaking and pinching my nipples.
I moaned and bit down on my lip.
He knew exactly how to touch me.
His hand stroked down along my chest and stomach. Then his fingers pushed between my legs. He rubbed around my clit in little circles until my breath caught in my throat. If I was ready before, I was dying for him now.
His fingers shifted and two of them pushed into my wetness. He stroked my spot.
> "Fuck," I groaned. "That feels amazing."
“Shhh,” he whispered when I cried out.
I whimpered underneath my breath. He was right about keeping quiet, but he made it so hard to do when he knew exactly how to work himself inside me and make me a squirming, moaning mess.
I cupped my own breasts. My fingers pinched at my already hard nipples as he watched entranced. He fingered me until I was too wet to think straight. "No more," I moaned. "I need you."
"I need you too." Christian rolled us sideway so I was on my back and he was on top of me. My legs wrapped around his waist automatically as he reached between us and froze.
"Christian?" I asked quietly. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing's wrong."
"Then why did you stop?"
"I forgot to stop on the way home and buy more condoms. We used the last one last night. It’s okay. We can do other things," he mumbled.
Christian started to shift away, but I squeezed my thighs around his waist. "I'm clean," I said as I pulled him back in place. "I was tested after my ex and I haven't been with anyone since."
He looked down at me. "Same with Daphne. I got everything checked just in case. Are you sure though?"
I smiled up at him. "I don't think I've ever been surer about anything in my life."
Christian's lips captured mine and my body trembled with nervous anticipation. He didn't waste time holding back or teasing me. Instead, he rubbed the head of his cock against me, up and down, until I squirmed and practically begged to feel it inside of me.
When he slipped inside of me, I cried out. It wasn't the same as it was with a condom. The feeling of his skin buried inside me made me moan and clench around him. Heat met heat and he thrust inside of me slowly as if he was savoring the feeling too.
Each thrust rubbed against my walls and made me moan. I wrapped my arms around his neck and tangled my tongue with his until I didn’t know whether I was coming or going. We rocked and shifted against the sheets.
"Christian," I moaned. "I love this, but please go faster. I'm dying here."
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