Leaving Hope to cry, she makes her way back to her daughter. Perching herself on the edge of the bed, Dorothy leans across and kisses her on the forehead. Alice is like an oven. Stroking her hair back from off her face, Dorothy tucks it behind Alice’s ear in the hope of cooling her down. Shuffling up and lying on the bed next to Alice, she reaches over and hugs her daughter tightly. Breathing her in, Dorothy whispers, “Lord only knows how much I love you, Alice. Lord only knows how much I need you. Lord only knows I would die for you. Please, my dear, come back to us, we cannot lose you.”
Holding her, Dorothy suddenly experiences a flashback from last night. Embodied with guilt after reading Alice’s personal and private letter, Dorothy feels she has betrayed her daughter and wants to confess. Pulling back slightly, an expression of shame darkens her face. Looking to Alice, she says, “My dear, I have to tell you something.”
Saying nothing, Alice continues to stare blankly her mum’s way.
Unable to make eye contact, Dorothy tucks Alice’s head under her chin. Stroking her daughter’s hair once more, nervous, Dorothy bites the bullet and says, “I’m so sorry. I don’t know how to say this, my dear.” Trying to block out Hope’s screams so she can tell her daughter her sin, Dorothy closes her eyes and continues, “I read your letter from Phil. I’m sorry. I know I shouldn’t have. I was so worried and just wanted to know…”
But before she can finish her sentence, the door bursts open. Running into the room with their little legs flapping at high speed, full of life and waving drawings they have made, are Terence and Rupert. And not too far behind them is Freddie. He too has his hands full. Freddie is carrying a huge bouquet of deep red roses, organised with perfection and sitting inside a beautifully designed box, with cream lace wrapped around it and a huge ruby red silk bow on the front. Trapped inside her medicated state, not so much as a flinch comes from Alice.
Wiping her eyes to conceal the tears, not wanting the boys to see her pain, Dorothy gets up off the edge of the bed. Turning around with a huge over the top smile, she shouts, “Boys!”
Racing and almost pushing one another over, both Terence and Rupert jump on the bed. Battling, these two mini boys cannot wait to hug and kiss their nannie and mummy.
Alice stares at her boys as they both bounce on her hospital bed with excitement. A single tear rolls down her motionless face.
Dorothy watches as Freddie slowly trails into the room with the bouquet in front of his face. He walks straight over to Hope who is still in her hospital cot. He looks shocked by her current screaming state. Placing the heavy bouquet onto the side, he makes his way back over to his little sister. Peering in, he sees she’s spat her dummy out. Unaware of the severity of his mum’s and Hope’s medical condition, he seems to think her dummy will solve the problem. He attempts to place it inside her mouth to try and stop her from crying. He becomes annoyed himself as she resists. Seeming grumpy and slightly tired, Freddie looks to his nannie Dorothy and says, “Wow, what’s her problem?”
“Oh, nothing to worry about, my love, she’s just a little under the weather.” Making her way across to Freddie, Dorothy puts out her arms, “Come here you and give your nannie a hug.”
Grabbing Freddie and squeezing him tightly, Dorothy tries her hardest to refrain from crying. Closing her eyes, she’s gathering the strength to let him go and keep a brave expression on her face. As her eyes gently flicker open, suddenly, something catches her sight. Peering up at the doorway, she sees Jesse entering. The moment Jesse’s foot lands inside the room, Hope’s scream hits its highest peak. Like a supersonic sound, her scream is loud enough to pierce eardrums. Squeezing their eyelids tightly together, each of the boys, along with Dorothy, place their hands over their ears, desperately trying to block out the deafening sound. Freddie shouts, “Ouch! Someone get her to stop.”
Terence and Rupert both jump under the covers of Alice’s bed. Little Rupert instantly begins crying. Burying his head in the blanket, Terence shouts at the top of his voice, “Stop, Hope, please stop crying.”
Each one of them has reacted to the sound. Well, all, that is, except Jesse. Placing the overnight bag he’s carrying on the floor, he closes the door behind him. In no rush, and without making eye contact with anyone, Jesse heads straight across to Hope.
Reaching inside the cot, he places his hands around Hope’s body. Securing his grip, he picks her up. As soon as Jesse makes direct physical contact with Hope, she stops not only screaming, but crying too. This tiny inconsolable baby girl is now silent and content. Shocked, Dorothy cannot believe what she’s just witnessed. Her jaw drops; she is literally lost for words. Uncovering his ears, Freddie says, “Thank goodness for that.”
Jesse cradles Hope with a smug grin on his face. Finally looking across the room and engaging in direct eye contact with Dorothy, he doesn’t say a single word. He doesn’t need to. Not wanting to create a scene, Dorothy chooses not to react or acknowledge what has just happened. Although her facial expression says it all. Scowling at Jesse, she says, “Where are Lewis and Eve?”
“Oh, hi to you, too, Dorothy, how nice of you to acknowledge me in the room—”
“Jesse, stop playing games,” Dorothy interrupts. “I’d prefer if you answered the question and didn’t try to goad me in front of my sick daughter and my grandchildren.”
“Goad you?”
“Yes, goad me.”
“Hmm, I’m not sure what you are referring to, Dorothy. I mean I’ve been looking after your grandchildren, and not only that, I’ve just managed to console this little one. Oh, sorry, did you?” His smug grin growing, Jesse continues with a sarcastic tone, “After all, Dorothy, let’s face facts. I don’t have the problem, you do. If you chose to think I’m ‘goading you’, as you say, then that’s on you. I’m merely making a point that you don’t usually acknowledge my existence.”
“Okay, whatever you say, Jesse. I’m not getting into this pettiness with you. Are you going to answer the question or not?”
“Sure, Dorothy. As far as I’m aware, they’re at home.”
“Didn’t Lewis want to come and see his mum?”
Rolling his eyes, Jesse replies, “Dorothy, he’s sixteen. He wants to be with Eve. He doesn’t want to be running around the hospital. He knows his mum is being looked after, so why worry him?”
“Worry him? His mum is in a potentially life-threatening state and you don’t think he should be here?”
Picking up on what his nannie has just said, Freddie says, “What…? Mum’s going to die?”
The realisation of what she has just blurted out sinks in for Dorothy. Wrapped in her own selfish emotions, she didn’t think before she spoke. His back to Jesse, Freddie frantically looks to his nannie for an answer. Meanwhile, cradling Hope, Jesse smirks. Laughing under his breath, he quietly says, “Go on, Dorothy, get out of this one.”
Regretting her words and trying to not cause any more psychological damage to her grandson, Dorothy says, “Erm, of course not, mate.”
Crying, Freddie says, “So why did you just say that?”
“I’m sorry, Freddie, I didn’t mean it, it was just an expression. It’s not the truth.” Kneeling down to Freddie’s level, Dorothy continues, “Come here, my handsome boys. Nannie needs a hug from you all.”
Gently climbing over their mum to reach his nannie, Terence is the first to jump on his nannie’s knee, closely followed by Rupert. Dorothy snuggles up and receives their love.
“Please, Nannie, what’s wrong with mum?” Freddie whispers in her ear.
“Don’t worry, she’s just tired,” she replies. Masking the sadness, Dorothy begins chuckling and continues, “Wouldn’t you be if you had to listen to your sister screaming all night?”
Smiling, Freddie replies, “Suppose so, yeah.” Seeming content with the answer he’s received, he asks, “Can I come stay at yours tonight?”
Dorothy woul
d love nothing more than to have Freddie stay over but tonight she has other plans. Tonight she’s on a mission. She has decided that she’s going to spend the evening finding out as much information as she can about Jesse and Eve. “Oh, my dear, tonight I already have plans,” she says, but seeing the sadness on Freddie’s face and feeling terrible she continues, “What’s the date today?” Checking her phone, she sees that it’s Friday sixth July. “Okay, prince, shall I tell you what?”
“What?”
“Tomorrow I’m completely free. What do you say, do you want to stay tomorrow instead?”
Beaming with happiness, Freddie jumps up and down as he says, “Yes, just me though, right?”
Smiling, she replies, “Well, if no one else wishes to stay over, then yes, just you.”
“I’ll make sure they don’t know where I’m staying. Ha!”
Overseeing the events, Jesse stands in the corner of the room with Hope still tightly grasped in his arms. Looking to Alice, he’s satisfied and content with her current paralysed state. As he gazes down at baby Hope, his eyes hold an air of secrecy hidden deep inside of them. These two individuals are connected as one. Chiming loudly throughout the ward, a bell is ringing. That can only mean one thing: visiting time is now over.
Chapter Twenty
The Call You’ve Been Waiting For
Leaning into the white porcelain sink, Matthew throws warm water onto his face. Using the paper towels provided, he pats his skin. His hands placed at either side of the sink, Matthew breathes heavily. As water continues to drip from his face, he looks at himself in the mirror, taking in the realities of his current state. Suddenly, he sees Jezebel in the reflection. A huge rage boils up inside of him and he punches the mirror, shouting, “Bitch!”
It creates a huge crack in the mirror, Matthew’s blood is spattered across the glass. Looking to the mirror once more, he sees she’s gone! Desperately trying to catch his breath as adrenaline surges around his body, Matthew notices that his knuckles are bleeding. Not wanting anyone to see, he rushes out of the pub and heads down the street.
Panicking, and aware that he needs to clean up, Matthew looks around and sees a shop about half a mile down the road. Thankfully, it’s still open – he can vaguely see people entering and leaving. Constantly checking over his shoulder to ensure that he isn’t being chased down the road, he heads toward the store. Once he has run far enough away to feel in the clear, Matthew slows down and makes his way inside the small family run shop. He rushes to the medication stand and grabs a bandage and some safety pins. Continuing to select items for his DIY first aid kit, Matthew gets a bottle of water, a bottle of vodka and then walks to the till.
“That’s a weird combination,” the friendly cashier says, attempting a joke. Winking he continues, “Ha! Aye, is the water so that you don’t get a fuzzy head in the morning?” Matthew remains silent. Even though he has not received a response to his question, the jolly cashier continues, “I know what you’re about, aye.” Tapping his head he says, “Up there for thinking and down there for dancing. Ha! Very clever. Well, it looks like you’re in for a good night.”
Matthew is not amused one bit. He stares at the cashier blankly. Wanting to pay for his items and get out of the shop, eventually Matthew says, “Sure,” in a desperate attempt to put an end to the conversation.
Obviously sensing the awkward energy, the cashier glances at the blood dripping from Matthew’s hand and replies, “Erm, okay, so that’s seventeen pounds eighty pence, please.”
Matthew passes him the money. With the uncomfortable pleasantries over, Matthew grabs his purchased items and instantly leaves the shop. Marching at a fast pace, with his head down low, he makes his way towards the back street where his vehicle is parked. Unlocking the car door, Matthew throws the vodka and bandage on the front seat. Twisting the plastic cap and opening the bottle of water, he tips the contents over his knuckles. Cleaning the blood and tiny shards of glass from his hand, Matthew closes his eyes and breathes deeply as it sends shooting pains up his arm. In agony, he struggles to hold his screams inside. Wanting to numb the pain, Matthew opens the bottle of vodka and gulps the toxic liquid down. Scrunching his features as it warms his insides, Matthew impulsively pours a small amount of this sterile liquid over his wounds. Content with the clean-up, he then begins wrapping the bandage around his hand to conceal his injuries.
Tired and feeling sorry for himself, Matthew has decided he’s not searching for his daughter this evening. The only desire he has right now is to get drunk and forget all about his depressing life for one evening.
With the darkness of the night fast approaching, the streetlamps begin to flicker on. Standing behind his car, Matthew searches in the boot for any items of clothing he can change into. Fishing out a crumpled shirt and a shark-grey blazer, Matthew puts these on. He doesn’t find any trousers to change into but much to his surprise, he does find some smart looking black shoes pushed into the corner. Taking off the uncomfortable boots and slipping into the shoes, Matthew’s relieved as the soft leather begins hugging his swollen feet. Matthew’s present look isn’t the tidiest but it’s smart enough to produce a somewhat respectable appearance. Locking his car and straightening himself up, he makes his way across the road to Chester Racecourse.
Since his continued mission to find his daughter is proving to be unsuccessful, Matthew’s convinced himself that this betting venue has a dual purpose. Not only can he get drunk to the point where he no longer knows his own name, he can, in his mind, also soak up some luck. Arriving at the front entrance, aware that he’s slightly intoxicated, Matthew thinks fast and manages to charm his way through.
Inside, the place is a sea of glamour. All the beautiful ladies and handsome looking gents are dressed up to the nines, standing in groups laughing and enjoying each other’s company. The energy within the room is buzzing. Bypassing the beautiful people, Matthew heads straight for the alcohol. Although it’s crowded, he manages to push his way through the masses of bodies and perches himself at the bar. Looking at the multiple huge television screens scattered around up high, Matthew checks out this evening’s runners. Straightaway, two horses catch his eye. Two chestnut-coloured five-furlong beauties with the odds stacked against them. Matthew’s gambling sixth sense has kicked in. It’s telling him that these runners are tonight’s unexpected lucky big winners. He leaves the bar before ordering a drink. Making his way across to the betting desk, he grabs the wad of cash he has from his pocket and says, “I wanna place a monkey on Celerity and a monkey on Caledonian Gold.”
Confused, the cashier says, “Monkeys?”
He has forgotten that he’s no longer down south. This young girl doesn’t understand his cockney slang. Laughing, he says, “Yeah, sorry sweet. I mean I wanna place a five-hundred-pound bet on each of those horses.”
Embarrassed and laughing back, she says, “Don’t worry, it’s not a problem. I just didn’t understand what a monkey was. I’ve not come across that one yet. Thanks for the heads up.” Flirting slightly, she flutters her eyelashes as she continues, “So the horses are Celerity and Caledonian Gold?”
“Yeah.”
“You sure you wanna do five hundred on each? I mean the odds aren’t too clever on them two.”
“Yeah, but think of the return.” Smirking and feeling brave in his slightly intoxicated state, Matthew returns the flirty behaviour. “I’ll tell you what, let’s make this exciting. As you can see I’m a betting man. If both of those horses come in first place, I’ll buy you a drink after work. What do you say…” Looking to her name badge he continues, “…Marilyn?”
“What, both come in first place?”
“Yeah, both of them, that’s how confident I am.”
“Okay, Mr Confident. If both horses come in first place, I’ll be so impressed that I’ll one hundred percent join you for a drink.”
He puts out his hand and Marilyn shakes it. Co
llecting his ticket, Matthew says, “Deal. Celery and Callie, I already thank you.” Kissing his ticket, he cheekily says, “See you later, Marilyn.”
Smiling as she watches Matthew walk away she shouts, “We’ll see.”
Sat at the desk inside her home-based office, Dorothy is on the internet frantically searching for anything she can find relating to Jesse and Eve. But without their full names, she’s struggling. Aware that Lewis and Eve are out this evening, she calls Lewis’s mobile, hoping he will inadvertently relay the information she needs in his haste to get her off the phone. Lewis picks up. She can hear music blaring in the background.
“Nan, is everything okay?” Lewis shouts, sounding worried.
“Lewis, can you hear me?” Dorothy yells back. But unfortunately the noise is too loud.
“One sec, Nan, I can’t hear you. Let me ring you back.”
Hanging up, Dorothy waits in anticipation for Lewis to call her back. It feels as if an eternity has gone by when the phone eventually rings. Answering straightaway, Dorothy shouts, “Lewis, can you hear me?”
“Yeah, that’s better, I can hear you now. What’s up, is mum okay?”
“What, huh, yeah darling nothing to worry about. Where’s Eve?”
“I’ve just left her with the group. I’ve come to the toilet where it’s quieter to talk to you. Do you want me to go get her?”
Relieved, Dorothy says, “No, it’s fine. Erm, Lewis, my dear, I’m trying to book train tickets for a special day out for us all, but they’re asking for Eve’s full name. As silly as it sounds, I don’t actually know it, do you?”
The Broken II: Tainted Trail Page 15