‘Drink?’ asks Gav.
Trina asks for a white wine and after a bit of deliberation I go for a gin and tonic because there’s only so much wine that I can drink. Not that I think I’ll be getting it anytime soon because the bar staff look rushed off their feet. There are a row of people already wedged against the who are all leaning over trying to catch the bar staffs’ attention.
Gav steps up to the bar and does some sort of wave with his hand over the head of the person in front, showing off a very flash watch in the process, and somehow the barmaid comes straight over to him and a space miraculously opens up and he steps into it. He leans over the bar and whispers in her ear and I see her smile and giggle before she goes off to get the drinks.
Trina is chatting animatedly with Seb and Neil looks over and sidles next to me.
‘Alright? Beccie isn’t it?’ He takes a swig of his beer.
‘Becca,’ I say.
‘Yeah, that’s what I said, Beccie. You just started in sales?’
‘My second week, Nigel.’ I can’t help myself.
‘Neil.’
‘Yeah, that’s what I said.’ He looks at me like he’s not sure if I’m taking the piss out of him.
Don’t be rude! barks the Beccabird. You wouldn’t say that if you hadn’t had two glasses of Processo !
She’s right, I wouldn’t and he’s only trying to be pleasant after all, it’s not his fault if he can’t get a name right. I look over at Trina; she’s engaged in deep conversation with Seb and if I don’t want to stand here like Billy no mates I’d better stop being so sniffy and make an effort.
‘So, how long have you been at Atkinsons?’ I ask with a smile.
Neil launches into an enthusiastic list of all of the high-flying sales jobs he’s ever had and I try to look interested although I’m struggling to hear him over the babble of voices because he has a tendency to mumble.
Gav reappears from the bar with my gin and tonic in a huge wine glass. It looks like a double or maybe even a triple.
‘So, after I left...’ Neil notices Gav and I see the imperceptible flick of the head that Gav gives Neil.
‘Thank you,’ I say as Gav thrusts the glass at me and I take it off him.
‘Got you a double,’ he says with a wink. ‘Saves queuing.’
‘Are the drinks still free Gav? Did you get me one?’ Neil leans towards Gav.
‘Yeah, it’s behind the bar mate. Get us another while you’re there.’
Neil doesn’t move.
‘You still here, Neil,’ Gav says unsmilingly without taking his eyes off me.
Neil looks around uncertainly and then moves slowly away towards the bar.
‘That wasn’t very nice,’ I say with a smile.
‘You’ll thank me later, I was saving you...’ Gav takes a pull of his beer. ‘…from his never ending list of extremely boring jobs. Nice bloke but he doesn’t know when to shut up. Probably why he struggles to get the sa les, doesn’t pick up when people have had enough.’
‘He wasn’t that bad.’ I can’t help laughing.
‘He would have been if I hadn’t got rid of him.’ Gav moves a bit closer to me and I get another waft of his very nice aftershave.
‘So…’ He’s so close to me there’s only about an inch of air between us, ‘…where have you been all my life?’
‘That’s about the corniest line in the world – and the oldest!’ I take a slurp of my gin although it’s difficult to get the glass to my lips because he’s so close to me.
‘Come on, I wouldn’t have missed someone like you around Frogham. Just moved here, have you?’
‘Might have,’ I say.
‘I definitely wouldn’t have missed you. I bet you brighten up sales admin.’
‘I don’t know about that but I feel more at home now I’ve settled in a bit. Trina’s been great, she’s helped me loads.’
‘Yeah, she’s lovely.’ He glances at Trina with admiration. ‘One of the best. How are you getting on with the ice queen?
‘Who?’ I ask innocently.
‘Em. Old frigid knickers.’ Gav sniggers.
‘Haven’t seen her since my first day.’ Thankfully.
‘No?’ Gav looks at me in surprise. ‘You’re lucky, she normally won’t leave the new ones alone. Likes to stamp her authority on them and show them who’s boss, make sure they knuckle under.’
‘Really?’
‘Yeah, she’s a right bitch.’ He takes a thoughtful sip of his beer. ‘She might be lulling you into a fall sense of security before she strikes.’
I look at him in horror.
‘Only joking,’ he says, seeing my horrified look.
But I don’t think he is. Joking, that is .
So now I’ve got something else to worry about apart from Jonathan and the knickers; a psychotic boss.
Neil appears from behind Gav with a bottle of beer which he shoves in Gav’s hand and a large gin and tonic for me.
‘Not for me, thanks, I’ve still got one. I can’t drink that quickly,’ I say virtuously.
‘Nonsense.’ Gav takes the glass from my hand and replaces it with the new one. ‘You’ve already finished it, look, it’s empty. Atkinsons is paying for it so it’s your duty to drink as much as you possibly can. Cheers.’ He chinks his bottle on my glass.
‘Cheers.’ I take a massive gulp.
God that’s good. I didn’t even realise I’d drunk the other one, must have done it while I was talking.
Stop! Leave now before you make a fool of yourself, bleats the Beccabird.
Oh shut up, you party pooper.
One more won’t hurt.
✽✽✽
The babble of voices has grown louder; seemingly with each drink that’s consumed the volume switch it turned a bit higher. I’m having such a great time; Gav and the boys have managed to find us a table in the corner and Trina and I are squeezed onto the middle of a long, padded bench between Gav and Neil. And the drinks just keep on coming. I don’t know why I was so worried about drinking because I must be on my fifth gin and tonic and I don’t feel drunk at all and I’m sure they were all doubles, too. I wonder whether the barmaid has been serving me tonic with no gin; perhaps the Beccabird’s had a word with her.
Most of the Marketing department have arrived and a lot of the sales reps have gathered around our table and they are such a laugh. I think I’ve definitely made a conquest in Gav because he’s making sure that no one gets too much of my time and the others seem to take notice of him because no one’s tried to muscle in. Trina says he’s a charmer and to watch him, but for the moment I’m just enjoying myself and having fun. Everything seems so funny and I haven’t laughed so much in a long, long time. And it’s nice to have someone so attractive fancying me and making it so obvious; it makes me feel good.
We’ve been introduced to the new arrivals but I’ve already forgotten their names, some of the women from Marketing look familiar so I think I must have seen them in the staff restaurant. I ask Gav if the women are sales reps and he gives me a bit of an odd look and tells me that they’re all admin. Then he smirks and adds that they’ve had women sales reps but they don’t seem to last very long. Neil looks at him and laughs and adds something about knowing whose fault that is and a strange look passes between them and Neil looks a bit embarrassed. Gav lowers his voice so I’m straining to hear him but I catch something about valuing jobs and keeping mouths shut.
They seem to clam up after that and I can’t get any gossip out of them at all but I’m sure Trina will fill me in on it all on Monday.
The youngsters from the office have slowly drifted away and left the pub because it’s far too boring in here for them. There’s a club just across the street which by all accounts is the place to go and they’ve gone there because this pub is just so lame , apparently. They’re missing all of the free drinks but they don’t seem to care about that and I’m sure everyone here will drink their share for them. There’s talk of us all joining them at the
club later but we have to wait for the bosses, who haven’t yet put in an appearance, to arrive .
‘Why don’t we just text them to meet us there later?’ I suggest as Trevor - another of the salesman -places yet another tray of drinks on the table. Gav has resorted to stowing the empty bottles under the bench as we’ve run out of room and can’t fit any more on the table.
‘Ooh, we can’t do that, Em would have a fit!’ Trina helps herself to another glass of wine. ‘Can you imagine the telling off we’d get if we’d gone when she got here?’
‘The rest of the office haven’t bothered, they’ve gone clubbing,’ I say, remembering the mass exit of the youngsters .
Trina snorts. ‘Like I’ve said before, they get special treatment.’
Everyone finds this really funny but no one contradicts her.
‘Maybe they’re not coming,’ I say. ‘Ed and Em don’t strike me as the hard-drinking type.’
‘They’re not big drinkers,’ agrees Gav, ‘But it’s not just them, our manager hasn’t arrived yet and he definitely does like a drink and he won’t be happy if we go clubbing without him.’
‘Yeah, and I don’t want to be the one to piss him off and suffer for it for weeks,’ Neil says.
‘He’s the one picking up the tab for the drinks,’ adds Gav.
‘I thought Atkinsons paid?’
‘They pay for some of it, but not all, the managers put their hands in their pockets for the rest.’
‘Wow, that’s generous.’ I take another slurp of gin.
Neil snorts. ‘You reckon? Have you seen what they earn? I’d be generous if I was on a hundred grand a year.’
‘Wow,’ I say again. ‘Better make the most of it, then,’ I replace my empty glass with a full one from the table. ‘I don’t mind waiting for them. ’
‘Nor me.’ Gav moves a bit closer to me and casually drapes his arm along the back of the seat. ‘Or,’ he whispers in my ear, ‘We could always skip the club and go somewhere quieter.’
I arch an eyebrow and try to look mysterious without actually saying yes or no. Gav’s very attractive and I like him but I don’t want to leave and miss half of the night, or rush into something that I might regret in the morning.
Very sensible, agrees the Beccabird, who sounds slightly worse for wear.
‘Hey up.’ A short, square salesman in a shiny silver suit nods in the direction of the door. ‘This looks like them now.’
Along with everyone else I crane my neck to see Ed and Em but because I’m sitting down I can’t see anything over the heads of everyone standing in the way.
‘Are we supposed to go over and say hello or something?’ I whisper to Trina.
‘God, no,’ snorts Trina. ‘I’m not getting stuck with Em all night or Ed, bless him.’
‘Feels a bit rude not to, though.’
‘Just nod in their direction when you see them, if they look at you. Trust me, you don’t want to be lumbered with either of them all night. And anyway it’s the youngsters that get all the pay rises and special projects and they make no effort at all to speak to them or even be here.’
I’ve no desire at all to speak to Emily ever again unless I absolutely have to so I’m relieved that I don’t have to make the effort.
After a few moments I see the top of Ed’s curly hair appear at the bar and as the crowd move aside I can see that he’s not suited and booted but is wearing a brown and cream paisley jumper and brown cord trousers making him look even more like a cuddly teddy. A couple of the salesmen go up to him and start to chat and I can just about see the back of Em’s head as she talks to someone standing next to Ed. It doesn’t look like she’s had hair extensions put in for the night and I feel a bit disappointed.
‘Si’s going to get them all a drink in, have a quick chat to show willing and then we can get over to the club.’ Gav finishes his beer and chucks the empty bottle under the table.
‘What about your boss? Isn’t he coming?’
‘He’s already here.’ He nods in Em’s direction.
I look over to Em as she steps aside to let someone through and get a view of the man she’s in conversation with.
‘What, him?’ I ask, with a mouth as suddenly as dry as the Sahara Desert.
‘Yeah, that’s him. Jon.’
I pick my glass up and swallow down the rest of my gin and tonic in one gulp and then take the fresh one from the tray on the table and drink that too.
Jon. Or to give him his full name, Jonathan Sayers.
My ex.
The reason I left Frogham seven years ago.
Chapter Nine
I open my eyes and a swirly white sky swims into view.
No. It’s not the sky, it’s the ceiling.
I lie still for a moment to take in my surroundings; I’m in my own bed with the duvet over me but as I lift it up, I can see that I’m still wearing the new black dress that I went out in last night. Although, obviously, this is not good as it means that I was incapable of getting undressed, in a way it is good because if I had no clothes on and were in a strange bed that would be bad. Very bad.
I have a dull thumping headache and an extremely dry mouth and my tongue feels like a large rubber ball has been inserted into my mouth but considering the amount of gin that I drank I don’t feel too bad at all.
That’s because you’re a hardened drinker, snaps the Beccabird.
I don’t need you to make me feel worse, I tell her, I feel quite bad enough already, thank you very much.
I wish, wish, wish, that I hadn’t gone last night because then I’d probably never have known that Jonathan worked at Atkinsons and even if I’d known I’d have been unlikely to have bumped into him. And more to the point he’d never have known that I worked there as well .
Remember when I said that I didn’t feel as if I’d even had a drink even though I was guzzling one after the other? Well that feeling lasted until the moment we stepped outside to go to the club; once the fresh air hit me, I felt absolutely wasted.
I pull the duvet over my head in an attempt to block out the memories but it’s pointless, there’s no forgetting the worst bits. One thing to be thankful for I remind myself; I’m at home in my own bed with my clothes on.
Considering the amount I drank it could have been much, much worse.
I felt sick when I saw Jonathan at the bar and also slightly impressed although I tried not to be. How did he get to be head of marketing? He always had the gift of the gab and could talk his way into anything but even so, how did he ever get that job? How did he get to be the high-flying head of marketing at Atkinsons and I’m stuck in a going nowhere, mundane job? I swallow down the bitter jealousy that rises like bile in my throat. Or maybe it is bile, considering the amount I drank. How unfair that seven years ago I was the one with the good job; I was the one with the career.
Boring is good, pipes the Beccabird. Boring is safe .
But it’s not, is it? Because here I am back in Frogham and back in Jonathan’s orbit. Back in danger because I have to admit to myself that I was attracted to him, drawn like a moth to the light. Stupid me.
Yeah, stupid you , mocks the Beccabird.
Jonathan’s a cheat, a liar and a swindler to boot so why the hell would I want to go back to him? I know what he’s like so why would I even give him the time of day?
Because there’s something about him that you can’t keep away from.
Okay, Beccabird, it was a rhetorical question .
He looked good last night, no getting away from that. The expensive suit looked good on him and he’d had a haircut and the overlong, scruffy hair he’d sported when I’d stalked him was gone.
Em was hanging on his every word and there wasn’t anything ice queenish at all about the way she was looking at him. I’d quickly sat back in my seat when I’d first seen him so that he wouldn’t see me and when Gav suggested we go to the club I’d decided that I wasn’t going, I was going straight home. If I could avoid Jonathan seeing me, I knew I
could still salvage the situation and he need never know that I worked at Atkinsons as well.
My good intentions lasted until I got outside into the fresh air and all of the drinks that I’d consumed hit me at once. I felt so unsteady that I had to hang onto Gav’s arm so I didn’t fall over. He didn’t mind at all and wrapped his arm around my shoulder and pulled me closer.
Why should I let him spoil my fun? I’d told myself as I snuggled up to Gav, why should he ruin everything for me again? I’ll just ignore him, I decided, pretend that I don’t know him and that I’ve never met him before in my life.
The Beccabird was screeching at me at the top of her voice, wings flapping, trying to get my attention so she could stop me from making a massive mistake but as usual I thought I knew better and ignored her.
It was dark in the club which made me feel a bit better, he was even less likely to see me if I made sure not to stand anywhere near him. And I did ignore the fact that Jonathan was there, for all of the half an hour that it took him to spot me.
I kept sneakily looking in his direction to make sure that he hadn’t moved around or was getting closer to me, so I happened to be looking right at him when he saw me. I can’t deny that I enjoyed the look of shock on his face, it was priceless. He soon recovered of course because Jonathan is nothing if not adaptable. And I couldn’t help myself; I gave him my best seductive smile and then turned away and moved a bit closer to Gav who took the opportunity to snake his arm around my waist and pull me even closer.
I knew Jonathan was watching me, I could feel his eyes on me and I knew that I looked good and I was glad about that.
Why? the Beccabird had demanded. Why do you care what he thinks? You want nothing to do with him ever again.
I just wanted him to know what he was missing, what he’d thrown away, I wanted him to see what he’d lost.
So why was it that when I saw him making his way over to me my heart skipped a beat and my stomach did a crazy flip? Why was a secret part of me pleased ? I tell myself now that I’d had way too much to drink so I wasn’t thinking straight but as the Beccabird so helpfully pointed out, it’s usually your true feelings that come out when you’re rat-arsed.
Say Hello and Wave Goodbye Page 9