by E. L. Todd
After staring at me for a while, he finally gave a nod in agreement. “I just don’t want her to fall in love with you and watch you move on to the next supermodel.”
“I’ve been very clear about my intentions.”
“Doesn’t mean she won’t fall in love with you anyway.”
“What makes you think I won’t fall in love with her?” I countered.
His eyes narrowed slightly, his head tilting to the side. “Is that a possibility, Neil?”
“It’s not impossible. Maybe I’m the one who will get hurt.”
“If you really felt that way, why would you leave her?”
I couldn’t give him the truth, that I would be on the first manned mission to Mars, and I may not come back. And if I did come back, it wouldn’t be for years. Even if I fell madly in love with her and changed my mind about marriage and kids, I wouldn’t stay. I was committed to this mission—and I couldn’t back out. “We still want different things…”
11
Charlotte
“Wow, you’re alive.” Stacy was already sitting at the table when I walked into the restaurant and fell into the chair across from her. “I was afraid you’d overdosed on cock.”
I rolled my eyes. “You can’t overdose on cock. Not possible.”
“I don’t know…depends on the size. I think I’ve overdosed on Vic’s a couple of times.” She waggled her eyebrows then looked at the menu.
“Okay…TMI.” I glanced at the menu and quickly picked a salad for an early dinner. “So, how’s the pregnancy?”
“Oh, hell no, we aren’t talking about that.” She pushed the menu to the side, telling the waitress we were ready. “I haven’t seen you in weeks, so what’s going on with you and Commander Neil Crimson?”
“Well…just cock overdoses.”
She rolled her eyes. “I mean, what happened? What did he say to you?”
“Said he hadn’t been with anyone else but me…and he missed me.”
“Wow…that’s kinda romantic.”
“Now you know why I dropped my pants.”
The waitress came over, and since we were in such a hurry to continue our conversation, we barked orders at her until she walked away.
“I told him I hadn’t been with anyone either, so we jumped into bed together, and that’s what we’ve been doing ever since.”
“So, he’s getting a pussy overdose.”
“I don’t think it’s possible for a guy to overdose,” I said. “But we don’t just hook up. He took me out to dinner, worked on a puzzle with me, we talk… Stuff like that.”
“Wow, that’s interesting.” She pulled her straw to her face and took a drink of her iced tea. “Neil didn’t hook up with one of his regulars when he came home, and he actually took you out in public… That’s not like him.”
“Yeah…”
“I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say he likes you.”
“I think that’s obvious, Stacy.”
“But he really likes you. Likes you in a way he’s never liked anyone else.”
I’d come to the same conclusion. “Yeah. But he’s been very clear about our future. He’s not gonna change his mind.”
She shrugged. “Vic said he wouldn’t change his mind. Look at him now.”
“Not everyone gets a fairy-tale ending, Stacy.”
“I don’t believe that. You’ll get your happy ending, Char. It may not be Neil, but it’ll definitely happen for you.”
I heard those words from people often, but I wasn’t sure if I believed them.
“I still think you mean something to Neil. And maybe after enough time passes, he’ll realize he can’t live without you. The question is, would you want to be with an astronaut?”
“I’ve never had a problem with his career choice. It’s sexy.”
“And very dangerous.”
“Everything is dangerous. You could get hit by a bus when you walk out of here.”
“Don’t tell me you don’t grasp the fact that Neil’s profession is exceptionally dangerous. It’s the most dangerous profession in the world.”
Yes, I did understand. “I support his passion. It’s important to him, so no, it doesn’t bother me.” I knew Stacy and Vic hated it, and that always hurt Neil. But I saw the way his eyes lit up when he talked about his work, the way it meant so much to him. I would always support whatever he loved.
“Then he really shouldn’t let you go.”
I wouldn’t get my hopes up, because if I did, it would only hurt more when he left. “We should just forget about that, Stacy. Neil and I are having a good time. For now, that’s good. He said if I meet someone else I like, he’ll bow out.”
Stacy finally took off the pressure. “How does Kyle feel about it?”
Awkward.
Stacy was about to drink her tea again, but she noticed the look on my face. “You didn’t tell him?”
I shook my head.
“Are you going to?”
“Of course. But I didn’t want to do it right after he told me how he felt. Seemed insensitive.”
“If he finds out from someone else, that will be really insensitive.”
“I know…”
“In Kyle’s defense, he’s a man. He took your rejection in stride. He still behaved like your friend the next day. So, he deserves more credit than that. I’m sure when you tell him about Neil, he’ll have the exact same response.”
“I’m sure he will. Kyle is great…”
“But not great enough, right?” she jabbed.
I knew she wanted me to be with Kyle, but I didn’t appreciate her pushing it on me. “I love Kyle and think he’s such a great guy. So do you. And because of that reason, he deserves a woman who’s head over heels and stupidly in love with him. He deserves a woman who appreciates him every single day. That’s not me—so I don’t deserve him.”
The hostility dropped. “You’re right…”
“I know I am.”
“I think Kyle is used to being with women who want him forever. But you’re the only woman he actually wants… A terrible predicament.”
“Even so, it’s not right. But I’ll tell him about Neil next time I see him.”
“Good. Because I feel like I’m lying to him by not telling him.”
“I understand.”
The waitress brought our salads, and we started to eat. It was a bit awkward between us since we had very different opinions about Kyle. But she was coming around about Neil because she thought he actually cared about me. “So…Neil told me a story about Vic.”
“Yeah?” she asked.
“I asked him if he knew when Vic had fallen in love with you, so he told me this story…”
“Girl, spill it.” Now she ignored her salad because this was much juicier.
“Neil told me they were watching a game when Vic left to grab a beer. His phone lit up, and that’s when Neil saw a picture of you sleeping on his lock screen.”
“What?” she shrieked. “Really?”
I nodded.
“Aww…that’s sweet.”
“He told me Vic was a super asshole before he met you.”
“No, he was still a super asshole when we met. But he was so hot that it balanced it out.”
“I actually think that makes him more romantic, because he only changed when he found the right woman.”
“Yeah.” She grinned. “That is pretty sexy, huh?”
“Are you going to tell Vic?”
“Probably not. That way, it’s my little secret.”
I grabbed my fork and kept eating.
Stacy got lost in her thoughts a bit, eating and thinking about the story I’d just told her. There was a slight smile on her lips, so it was obvious she was still thinking about it.
I gave her some space so she could enjoy it a bit longer. “So, I never told you Cameron stopped by.”
“Oh my god, he did? What did he want?”
“First, he apologized…which was nice.”
&n
bsp; “And then what? He didn’t try to get you back, right?”
I nodded. “He did.”
She rolled her eyes. “Idiot.”
“I told him that would never happen and I didn’t think we should be friends either.”
“Good. You don’t owe him anything.”
It didn’t matter how much I loved Cameron at one point. Everything we built together was destroyed by his unforgivable betrayal. I wished him all the happiness in the world…just not with me.
“So, you have three guys after you. Kyle, Cameron, and Neil.”
“I wouldn’t put it like that…”
“But that’s what’s happening.”
“I told Kyle no, and he moved on. I said the same to Cameron, and he moved on too. So there’re not three men actively reaching for my affection.”
“Spin it however you want, but you’re one hot piece of ass.”
“I don’t know about that, but thanks for saying it anyway.”
I stopped by Kyle’s place before I went home. He had a house in northern Houston, about fifteen minutes away from where I lived. I pulled up to the house and didn’t see any cars in the driveway, so he didn’t have any company. His truck was probably in the garage.
I walked to the front door and rang the doorbell.
“Don’t be home…” I was dreading this. Even if he had a good reaction, it was still an uncomfortable conversation. If it did bother him, he would have to pretend it didn’t. And if he couldn’t pretend, then I had to pretend it wasn’t a big deal… It was so messy. I wished Kyle had never made his move.
It took a long time for him to answer the door, and when he did, he was shirtless. Black sweatpants hung low on his hips, and his tanned skin seemed flushed with blood, like he’d just been working out but he wasn’t quite sweating. “Hey. Everything alright?” He didn’t let me inside like he normally did, blocking the door with his size.
“Yeah, I just wanted to talk. Are you busy right now?”
“No. But give me a second.” He shut the door.
This was even weirder. I even had a key to his house so I could walk in whenever I wanted, that was how close we were. This behavior was definitely unusual. I wondered if I’d interrupted something important…or maybe I should have texted him first. He showed up at my doorstep all the time, and I didn’t think twice about it.
He opened the door again, but this time, a pretty blonde was there. “I’ll see you later.” He gave her a quick kiss on the mouth before she walked past me and disappeared from sight. She turned past the garage and walked up the sidewalk.
“Kyle, I didn’t mean to interrupt anything—”
“She was about to leave anyway. Come in.” He left the door wide open then stepped inside, his muscular back so tight that the muscles shifted under the skin as he moved. His shoulders were broad, and his thick arms were covered in a web of veins. His skin was tanner than usual, like he’d been running outside in the morning before work. “You want a beer?”
I wanted to apologize for intruding like that, but it didn’t seem to matter. His date was gone, so it wouldn’t make a difference. “Sure.”
He grabbed two from the fridge and twisted off the cap for me.
“Thanks.”
He walked into the living room then sat down, his stomach still flat because he was so fit. He was in better shape than I remembered, tighter and fitter. His hair was a little shorter, like he’d just gotten it cut, and he’d shaved off his beard. Now he was cleaned up, looking like a whole new man.
I tried not to stare at his naked chest, the way his pecs looked like two slabs of concrete. I turned to the blank TV and drank my beer. “I didn’t know you were seeing someone.” Maybe I didn’t have anything to worry about, that he’d already moved on after our conversation.
“I’m not.” He grabbed the remote and turned on the TV. “I met her last weekend.”
“Do you like her?”
He shrugged and took another drink. “Which game do you want to watch? Basketball and hockey are both on.”
It didn’t matter to me. “Basketball.”
He turned the channel then watched it like nothing was different between us, like he hadn’t just had a beautiful woman in his bed before I rang the doorbell. Everything was normal…like that conversation and kiss never happened. “I can order a pizza if you’re hungry.”
“No, I’m fine.”
He didn’t ask me why I was there, as if I didn’t need a reason to drop in like this.
I was sitting on the other couch, so I moved to be right beside him.
He leaned back against the cushion and kept looking at the TV. “How’s Stacy doing?”
“Good. Pregnancy is going well. She and Vic are still looking for a house.”
“Buying a house is so stressful. It’s so much work that I’m never moving. I’ll die in this place.”
I chuckled. “Yeah, it was stressful. But totally worth it.”
His eyes watched the player move across the court and make the basket. “You want to play ball with us after work tomorrow? It’s gonna be me and a few guys from the surgical floor.”
“Yeah, sure.”
He took another drink of his beer then set it on the coffee table. “What’s new with you?”
Kyle and I didn’t have lengthy conversations like Stacy and I did. We talked about sports, politics, and sometimes, we didn’t talk at all. He was definitely a much chiller friend than Stacy because he went along with anything. “Um…that’s actually what I wanted to talk to you about.”
“Alright.” He turned his gaze on me, looking at me with those sky-colored eyes.
I didn’t want to say it, but the longer I waited, the worse it became. “I just wanted you to know that Neil and I started seeing each other again.”
There was no reaction whatsoever. He didn’t get angry, bow his head in sadness, or show any outward emotion. He turned his gaze back to the TV, his posture exactly the same as before. “Charlotte, you’re free to do whatever you want. I don’t care if you want to be with Neil or any other guy. We’re friends, so I support everything you do. He seems like a decent guy. I just don’t want you to get hurt…but it seems like you don’t care about that.”
The same sentiment had been echoed by everyone else. “Every relationship ends in heartbreak.”
He shook his head slightly. “That’s only true when you’re with the wrong person. And you know Neil is the wrong person.”
12
Neil
I showered after the gym then sat on the couch. I’d been there for less than five minutes when my phone vibrated with a text message.
I’m coming over.
I smiled as I read her text. Presumptuous.
Got a problem with it?
No, baby.
I went into the kitchen and cooked dinner, grilled chicken with sautéed veggies. I’d just finished when a quiet knock sounded on the door. “Come in.” I turned off the stove and scooped the food onto two plates.
She came into the kitchen, wearing a loose sweater and skinny jeans. As time passed, it was getting cooler and cooler, the summer humidity mostly a thing of the past. She sauntered toward me, her eyes glancing at the sizzling dinner I’d just made. “I hope one of those is for me.”
“They can both be for you if you want.”
She snatched a stalk of asparagus and took a bite. There wasn’t a sound, but it seemed like an audible crunch filled the room. “Neil Crimson cooks.”
“Sometimes.” I pulled the piece out of her fingers and took a bite myself. “And I cook pretty well.”
She pulled the veggie out of my hand then rose on her tiptoes to kiss me. “But you kiss better…”
My arm wrapped around her petite waistline, and I pulled her close to me, forgetting the food and getting lost in her warm embrace. I turned her back into the counter and cornered her into place. My hand gripped her thigh, and I pulled her leg over my hip. I pressed her farther into the cabinets, letting her fee
l my hard-on, feel how she turned me on so quickly.
She moaned into my mouth when I hit the right spot. Her arms circled my neck, and she ground against me, kissing me with those eager lips. Sometimes she gave me her small tongue, letting a hot breath escape in my mouth.
I was shirtless, so all she needed to do was pull down my bottoms to get me naked. She shoved my sweatpants and boxers over my hips until my cock was free. Then she pushed them farther down, getting me naked so she could wrap her fingers around my dick and jerk me off as she kissed me.
Damn.
I wished it was summer so she could come over in just a short dress with no panties underneath. I could slide into that pussy quicker, feel that slickness without having to yank off her jeans.
She turned her head and brought my lips to her neck, telling me exactly what she wanted. She tilted her chin back and let me devour her.
I dragged my tongue up her silky-smooth skin then planted a big kiss on her neck, sucking the skin so hard that I felt like a vampire trying to suck her blood. My fingers unbuttoned the top of her jeans before I pushed them down, letting them sink to her knees. I pushed her panties down next, my fingers sliding over her slit so I could feel that perfect little pussy.
She moaned loudly when I touched her in the right spot.
I grabbed her hips and turned her around, bending her over the counter so I could fuck her from behind.
“What about the food?” she asked, her shirt just inches from the plate.
I leaned over her then pushed everything to the side. “I don’t give a shit about the food. I’m gonna eat you instead.”
She was folded underneath me, her tits perfect along with every other curve of her body. Her knees were close to her chest as I pounded her into the mattress. My cock could fuck this pussy forever, but it never went dry. She was always wet for me, whether it was three in the morning or three in the afternoon. Every time I thrust, I went balls deep, fucking this woman in a way I’d never fucked a woman before. Skin-to-skin, chest-to-chest, we were one person. I was about to come again. I could feel my balls tightening toward my body, feel my cock aching for release. Charlotte made up for that lonely three months, and these memories would have to be enough to satisfy me during my long voyage far into space.