“Like yours, Mickey? Noelle is in labor, and the baby could be yours. Don’t you want it? Don’t you want the chance to just be normal, to not worry about father or the cartel? It could happen. You could just take them and go.”
“No.”
“What do you mean, no? Has he really hardened you that much, where you would deny your own child?”
“The baby isn’t mine.”
“It could be yours. You fucked her before our father got his hands on her.”
“I can tell you, for a fact, that baby isn’t mine, Maria. I’m never having children. I will never give our father a chance to corrupt another generation, be it by DNA or influence. No child of mine will ever come into this world.”
“Birth control fails all the time,” Cinny said, slumping back in her seat, too tired for this conversation.
“I took measures to make sure I would never have children. You should consider doing the same.”
“What are you saying?”
“Just what I said. I made sure I will never add to the Perez line, and I think you should do the same.”
“I’m on birth control, Mickey, and condoms are not a hundred percent effective. If that child is yours, can you honestly tell me that you could hand it over to strangers to raise?”
“I’m not going to repeat it again, Maria. That baby is not mine. I had a vasectomy four years ago when our father, in all his wisdom, thought pairing me with a rival’s daughter would benefit the business. I also made sure the woman knew it, so she would deny the union.”
Holy crap. Cinny couldn’t believe what she was hearing. It saddened and infuriated, but a tiny part of her got it. She was, after all, only considered a breeder in her father’s eyes. Marriages broke apart all the time, but children connected families. Children were Miguel Perez’s legacy.
“Changing the subject slightly, how can you watch what he does to her? You loved Noelle once, I know you did.”
Mickey’s voice softened, but she still heard him and the underlying hurt.
“Noelle made her choice. She didn’t go into this with her eyes closed, Ria. She knew what would happen and knew the consequences of accepting our father into her bed. She did it willingly.”
Cinny turned her head toward the window.
“I doubt that, Mickey. Noelle is a victim, just like the rest of us, to our father’s madness, and just like us, she’s protecting the people she loves. We owe her. She wouldn’t have even been in his sights if it wasn’t for us, to begin with.”
Cinny had a ton of regrets in her life, and a big one was ever bringing Noelle to meet her family. Noelle had been so naïve, but she fell head over heels in love with Mickey, and nothing Cinny ever said would change her mind. Unfortunately, that love also bought her father’s attention and jealousy. Beautiful, tiny, blonde-haired, wide blue-eyed Noelle never saw the devil coming for her. Just thinking about it made Cinny sick. Never looking away from the window, Cinny reached out her hand and put it on top of her brother's, squeezing it tightly.
“We’re going to make it right, aren’t we?”
“I don’t think we can ever make it right, but we’re going to try to make it better.”
Cinnamon, Spice and Nothing Nice
Present Day
“Still think he saved you? Would do anything for you? Your biker just signed your death warrant or at least your indictment.”
“Knock it off, Mickey, we knew this was a possibility.” Cin moved around the car. Unfortunately, her brother wasn’t done talking.
“They use you every chance they get, Maria. I think it’s about time you got a clue and knock all those fucking bikers off the pedestals you put them on.”
Cin didn’t say anything for a long while, just watching as Caine drove away. She had known it was going to come to this eventually but had held out hope that there would be something left of the friendship and love they had for some many years when everything was said and done. Now Caine couldn’t even stand to look at her. She didn’t blame him, hell she hated looking at her own self in the mirror most days.
“That’s how much they care about you.” Micky pointed at Caine’s retreating bike.
“Enough!” Cin glared at her brother. “I’ve had it. Our deal still stands—I do what I have to do to end our father, and you keep all the members of the BRMC and the RBMC out of it.” Cin crossed her arms over her chest cocking her head to the side. “Unless you’ve decided to take a page out of our fathers’ book and not hold up your end of the deal? Because in that case, I will stop letting my ass get beat daily, quit playing this messed up game, forget about your problems with securing the cartel, and put a bullet right between his eyes in a heartbeat. All you have to do is say the word. Your choice, brother.” Mickey didn’t comment, but Cin knew he wouldn’t.
Everything they had done for most of their lives had been leading up to what was going on now. Their legacy, the cartel, was a powerful, menacing machine always breathing down their necks, much like their father. If either fell without properly vetted leadership in place to take over, none of them had a chance. Other families would do whatever it took to take them out and take over all the Perez businesses and boundaries.
As the only daughter of Miguel Perez, Cin was the biggest bargaining chip any of them had. The trick would be using that to her and her brothers’ advantage and not their fathers. For years, she and her brothers had rebelled against it, denied it, but it always came back as the only way to secure any type of future for all of them. Those thoughts and the words that came out of her brother’s mouth only succeeded in pissing Cin off more.
“When are you going to stop selling your body for those assholes’ lives?”
Cin opened the car door but stopped before getting inside.
“Funny, I guess it’s okay to whore myself in the name of my family, but it isn’t acceptable to do the same for my friends.”
Her brother looked at her sternly but didn’t comment, just like she knew he wouldn’t. That was one thing about Mickey. He didn’t like being confronted with the truth of what their lives entailed. She would never say her brother was a good man—what they were born into and who gave them life prevented that—but Mickey at least tried to mitigate the damage as much as he could. So, him saying that not only hurt, it infuriated Cin and made her want to lash out.
Getting into the car, Cin buckled up, looking out the window, not really seeing anything, just needing the moment of silence. It didn’t do either of them any good to fight. When he took her hand, squeezing it, silently saying, ‘I’m sorry,’ Cin squeezed his hand once, then released it, but still didn’t look at him. She had questions that needed to be answered.
“How did we not know about Donovan Lowe?” The silence in the car continued as the miles passed by. Cin looked at her brother. “Or should I say, how did I not know about Donovan Lowe?”
“It’s irrelevant and not what you should be concentrating on now.” Mickey never took his eyes off the road.
Irrelevant her ass. Cin couldn’t even wrap her mind around that statement. Nothing they were doing or was happening now was irrelevant. All of it had meaning and consequences. There were so many facets of their family business Cin absolutely did not understand or want to, but a man returning from the dead, enlisted into the cartel as a high standing enforcer, that bothered her. She wanted the details.
How had it happened? How had the man gained her father’s trust? Had he always been a traitor to Caine? Where did his true loyalties lie? Cin knew that there were law enforcement plants within the cartel, hell, Talon was one of them, but this man concerned her. There were just too many questions surrounding him, at least as far as Cin was concerned. She didn’t need another monster breathing down her neck. She had enough of them.
They pulled into a private airport, where their jet was waiting to take them back to Texas. Every time they had to make their way back to the demon that ruled their lives, her heart dropped into her stomach. Like a little kid, she went throu
gh the gambit of thoughts—running, hiding, just ending it all—but ultimately got out of the vehicle and followed her brother toward the entrance to the tarmac.
“When will Damian announce your engagement?”
“He won’t—”
Mickey stopped, turning and brutally grabbing her shoulders as if to shake her.
“We don’t have the luxury of any more time, Cin. Merging the two families is the only way to keep our father busy enough to stop his other pursuits. It’s going to be hard enough without your compliance.”
Cin jerked back from his grip, gritting her teeth.
“I know my part in all of this, Mickey. You didn’t let me finish. Damian won’t announce the engagement until I tell him to. As you know, this puts us several months ahead of schedule.”
“Timelines change all the time, get used to it. I suggest you get a ring on your finger within the next few days. Otherwise, Father will get bored, and we both know what happens when he isn’t entertained. At least when Noelle was there, the man was occupied.”
“You aren’t seriously suggesting we should have left Noelle with him, are you? Have you become that cold and jaded brother?”
“You’re so naïve.” Mickey shook his head, scolding her like a child, putting Cin more on edge. “Noelle knew exactly what she was getting into, and with the child out of the way, she would have continued.”
“Jesus, what have we become?” Cin turned away, shaking her own head. “At one time, you cared for Noelle, but now she’s just another pawn in your game. When does it all end? When our father is lying six feet under the ground, or will this shit just keep on happening? I think you like the game too much, brother dear.” Laughing, she said, “You call me naïve, but honestly, I would rather be naïve than hard, uncaring, and resigned. What are you going to do when you’re the only one left standing, no pawns at your disposal? No family at your side? What then, brother? Will it still all have been worth it?”
Cin got onto the plane, nodding to the pilot before taking her seat. Neither of them could talk freely anymore. The game started again once they stepped foot on the plane. Cin needed to act the meek, beaten, and abused female, and Mickey needed to act like the cold-hearted ass, she was starting to believe he had become. This was Miguel Perez’s world. She was amazed she had any freedom at all.
When she had made the deal to come back, Cin had expected to be locked in a room, bound and gagged until her purpose for the family was completed. That was one thing her brother didn’t take into consideration. Their father’s obsession with the BRMC and RBMC had allowed them a chance to plan. And she had to admit, in some respects, Noelle’s presence had also done the same. Now, with law enforcement, the clubs, and the other cartels breathing down their necks, her father’s focus would scatter, turning most of his vitriol toward his children because his world was starting to crumble.
Cin had realized a long time ago just how fucked up her family was because of their father’s continual abuse and control. Cin hadn’t even seen several of her brothers in years. Each of them had been meticulously placed to garner her father the most power possible. Each one of them quietly worked against that outcome, or so she was told. Now, she was even starting to question that. Only Mickey and Juan had remained by his side. Mickey as his heir apparent and Juan as his chosen whipping boy. She wondered if it all wouldn’t be better if they all just disappeared once and for all, letting the cartel legacy die off completely. In her heart, she would never wish harm upon her brothers but listening to Mickey now, watching him, being around him, she wondered if anything would change even if they did manage to take their father down.
Mickey took his seat next to her, buckling in.
“I’ve been informed Damian will be waiting for you upon our arrival.”
That was nothing new to Cin. Damian was always waiting for her. He was just as much of a pawn in this game as she was, but he, unfortunately, liked his position a little too well.
“Father has left instructions on how you should present yourself. He has also made an appointment with Dr. Frida.” Mickey handed Cin the paper he had been holding in his hand.
Cin read it, and it was the same old bullshit for the most part—what he expected her to wear, how he expected her to act, and what he wanted her to do. Dr. Frida was a new addition to her normal instructions. The man was an OB/GYN, specializing in fertility, which was not a good sign. Cin didn’t say anything, looking at her brother quizzically. Mickey very slightly shook his head, telling her without words, they were being monitored. When the engines started and the plane began to taxi down the runway, making its assent, he leaned closer to her, quietly whispering in her ear.
“I don’t know, but I would suggest it is more important than ever to get that ring on your finger, or you’re going to be getting another gift that neither you nor Damian want. You should have gotten fixed like I told you to do all those months ago, but maybe it’s a good thing you didn’t.”
Cin turned away, looking out the window, watching the clouds pass her by. God, Mickey had become so callous, and she was afraid she was following in his path because she had again thought the same thing. The rest of the trip was uneventful and silent, Mickey making himself busy, working on his phone and tablet. Cin didn’t have that luxury, wasn’t allowed to do anything like work. When they got to Texas, a car was already there to pick them up. She hadn’t expected Talon to be the driver. Usually, when she saw him, he reminded her of better times, the life she so desperately wanted to get back to, but today, with everything that had happened, he was a grim reminder of what she would never have again. When this was all over, she wouldn’t be going back to the RBMC or to the BRMC. She would never see any of them again because Maria “Cin” Perez would no longer exist—she would either be dead or someone else entirely. She had mixed feelings about both outcomes. On one hand, she welcomed either, but on the other, she dreaded them. Her face must have shown her thoughts because when Talon opened the door to the car for her, he quietly asked her if she was okay, and she actually chuckled.
“I don’t think I ever have been, and I don’t think I ever will be.”
COMING SOON FROM CHELSEA HANDCOCK
Cinnamon, Spice, and Nothing Nice
Talon
Book nine in the Ruthless Bastards MC Series.
Negotiating Venus
Book two in the Z’Lelryrian Mates Series.
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
A special thank you needs to go to my editor, Sandy Ebel, with Personal Touch Editing. You have helped me make a good book great. DeAnne, Rachele, and Melba, thank you so much for being my beta readers. Your feedback helped me more than you will ever know.
A huge thank you to Michelle RLS Sewell, my cover designer. I love that you can read my mind and make beautiful covers each and every time.
To my sister, you always have my back, something I will never be able to repay. Thanks for always being there. Thanks for the encouragement and supporting my dreams.
To my husband, I know I make you want to pull your hair out sometimes, but your unwavering support and confidence in my abilities astound me every single day.
To my readers, thanks for giving me a chance. I hope you stick with me and discover all the trials and tribulations yet to come. I hope I leave you guessing, but most of all, I hope I leave you intrigued. Enjoy the ride and happy reading.
ABOUT THE
AUTHOR
I wish I could say that it was my lifelong dream to become an author, but it wasn’t. I never even consider it a possibility.
Married young, my sole focus became my husband, raising my children, building my career, and just getting through, day by day. Then, as it often does, everything changed. My mother, an amazing lady who I loved dearly, had an elective surgery that went terribly wrong and ultimately lost her life after thirteen horrible months. The career I had focused on entirely disappeared because of a buyout, leaving me with no options in my area to continue in my chosen field, and my children grew u
p much to my dismay. I found myself at a complete loss.
Spending hours at the hospital and a new job, where I had way too much free time, I was lucky enough to find an escape in reading. I became a crazy woman, reading anything and everything I could get my hands on, letting my imagination run wild. One night, my oldest son came to visit, and out of the blue, I said, “I could do this.” The rest is, shall we say, history.
My child didn’t let up until I wrote my very first book. Even then, I was scared. The book was written, but as many of us do, I was like, ‘Now what?’ Well, with shaking hands and a ton of nerves, I went to my best friend, my husband, and handed over this world I’d created, not expecting much. Romance, let alone paranormal romance, is not his choice of reading material. Still, being the supportive husband he has always been, he took it.
I can’t even tell you what I was doing, trying to distract myself from the fact someone was reading my book. It was such a weird feeling. Not long after, he found me with an extremely pissed-off look, holding those precious papers clenched in his hand, basically crumbled. My heart dropped, but not for the reasons you may think. I didn’t have a single plan to publish it. I just wanted to say I had done it and truth be told, get my son off my back. He started shaking those papers at me, and I heard those words every author dream of, “This is good.”
To date, I have written and published nineteen books, soon to be twenty. I still miss my mom every single day, and my husband and kids are just as crazy supportive as they always have been. Although that time in my life hurt so terribly, it also brought me here. So, I am grateful every day for this tremendous opportunity to share a little of my imagination with you. If you like romantic suspense with sexy shifters, badass bikers, and awesome aliens, check me out!!
To stay up to date with new releases and information about my books, check out my Facebook readers group, Chelsea’s Chosen Chicks - https://www.facebook.com/groups/Chelseas.Chosen.Chicks
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