by Cathy Gaitan
“Oh, just shut up,” I tell him. Before I can say anything else he grabs me by the back of the head and shoves my face into his beard. It’s actually soft and smells really good because he uses some kind of beard treatment on it.
“Admit you love my beard,” he rumbles. He’s not hurting me but still, I shove my fist into his solar plexus causing him to wheeze and immediately release me. I can’t have him thinking he can get away with that kind of stuff. I have standards.
“It’s a good beard,” I concede. It’s all the praise he’s getting from me. If I give him any more he’ll milk it for days.
Titus rubs his middle. “You’re damn right it’s a good beard. The best.” He doesn’t need my praise. He gives himself plenty.
“We better pack,” I change the subject. I’d like us to arrive before the other groups. Mercy and I have things we need to hash out. Like how to get her to forgive me without having to grovel. I’m pretty sure ‘I’m sorry but you deserved it’ won’t go over too well.
Titus snickered. “My stuffs already packed and in the car.”
I look around the room in consternation. Yep. Not a single item belonging to him remains. Damn! How did that happen without me noticing?
“Come on, I’ll help you get your stuff together,” he volunteered with a grin. Oh, he’s loving this. I’m usually the one ahead of the game.
“Call the other groups and get an ETA,” I order. It’s my lame way of reclaiming control. I fully admit it. To myself.
Titus isn’t fooled though. With a sly wink he says, “I’m on it boss.” He picks up his phone and starts dialing. I really hate that he knows me this well.
********************************************************
Carmony Grimshaw
A few hours from Happyville
If Mary Mary picks up one more stray animal I am going to kill her! I am so sick of this kumbaya road trip. I told Mercy I was having a blast but in truth I am in hippie hell.
Right now I’m sandwiched between a huge mutt who growls at me anytime I look at him and a small mutt that keeps trying to climb in my lap. Mary Mary loves it and the Woodley brothers fall all over themselves trying to please her. ‘You want to stop for another mongrel? No problem!’ It is so ridiculous!
I wasn’t lying when I told Mercy we have a caravan. There are four other groups with us. Their favorite phrases are ‘far out’ and ‘right on’. I think I may be experiencing a brain bleed because my left eye is twitching like mad and I’ve been clenching my hands so tight they’re starting to spasm.
My own dog is riding with the Partridge Family. Not literally but they sing every damn song on the radio. Apparently Jasper likes that. I never said he was a smart dog.
“I can’t wait to see everyone,” Mary Mary exclaimed excitedly. “I wish we could just hurry up and get there.”
If she wouldn’t ask to stop every 20 minutes we could. I don’t say it but I’m thinking it really hard hoping it can somehow penetrate her mind. What I say out loud is, “Yeah, me too.” I said it through clenched teeth but as usual Mary Mary doesn’t notice.
Abel turns and gives me the stink eye. I’m pretty sure he picked up on it and he obviously doesn’t like it. So what? He’s not the one stuck back here with the animal kingdom. There’s a Saint Bernard in the seat behind us that keeps licking my hair. It’s so gross! Every time he does it Mary Mary laughs like it’s the funniest thing she’s ever seen.
Every time Mary Mary laughs so do the Woodley’s. It’s so-o cute! Not!! When we reach Happyville I’m going to request a reassignment. There is no way in hell I can do this again. NO. WAY.
“I’m so glad Mercy’s not dead anymore,” sighed Mary Mary.
“So am I,” the Woodley’s said in unison. Barf.
“It really sucks that Julia killed her in the first place,” I say. Abel glares at me again. Oops. I forgot. I’m not supposed to be negative. We exist in a happy zone. It’s one of the reasons Mary Mary was so excited to go to Happyville.
Well, I’m not happy! Sorry. Not Sorry!
Mary Mary pretends I didn’t say anything negative at all. “Yes, I’ll also be happy to see Julia and Titus again,” she says.
“That’s not what I,” I’m about to correct her when Abel interrupts me.
“Yes. We have a lot of catching up to do,” he says.
“We definitely do,” agreed Mary Mary. She sucks in a breath at something she sees outside the window. “That poor dog. Stop the car,” she shouts like clockwork.
I look at my watch. Yep, 20 minutes exactly. Beam me up Scotty. Please!
********************************************************
Kailani
3 miles from Happyville
I’m not gonna lie, I’m happy to be wrapping up this road trip. Don’t get me wrong I like traveling. I always have. But it will be nice to stay in one place for a while. Thankfully Tupelo, Paisley and Denim were great travel companions.
“I think Mercy’s gonna love it,” exclaimed Paisley from the backseat. She’s putting the finishing touches on the gift basket we pitched in for. It has all Mercy’s favorite things or at least a lot of them. That Zombie female likes a lot of stuff.
“I put extra because you know Pink and Titus are going to raid it. And Lumina will demand some of it also,” she explained as she straightened the bow.
Tupelo smiled. “Don’t underestimate Mercy. She takes her junk food seriously. Those males will have a fight on their hands if they try to take it from her,” he laughed. “But that cat will definitely get hers. She doesn’t play.”
Denim nodded in agreement. “That’s the damn truth. That cat once went ballistic on me when I took a box of Nerds from her. She’s as crazy as Mercy.”
“Hey,” I shouted, stomping on the break. I turned to glare at Denim. “Mercy’s not crazy. If you say that again we will have issues.” I don’t like to argue but that’s a hot button for me. In my experience men use ‘crazy’ as an excuse to treat women like dirt. Denim doesn’t give me that vibe but I find it’s best to make myself clear about these things.
I knew he got the message when he said sheepishly, “Sorry, Kailani. It won’t happen again.” No it won’t.
“Thank you.” I appreciate his cooperation.
Paisley patted his knew and went back to chattering. “Hopefully Mercy and Julia can clear the air without too much bad blood. Not that I would blame Mercy if there was. I mean Julia did try to make a kabob out of her heart after all.”
“No kidding. That had to sting and I don’t just mean physically,” agreed Denim.
“Honestly, I don’t know how things could possibly be the same after that,” mused Tupelo. “Mercy though of Julia as a sister. The betrayal must have been unreal.”
I felt it necessary to defend Julia. “For her to do that Julia must have been hurting pretty badly herself. I think she felt just as betrayed by Mercy’s blog. To have her weaknesses displayed like that would have been a huge blow for someone as controlled as Julia.”
“That’s true,” murmured Tupelo thoughtfully. “Julia doesn’t trust easily.
“I really hope Julia and Titus arrive before us. I’m sure it would be so much easier for them to talk things out without everybody in our group there to witness the exchange,” Paisley sighed.
All this talk was bringing me down. “No worries,” I told them sounding more cheerful than I felt. “I’m sure everything will be fine. Mercy is really bad at holding grudge. Look at Pinkerton. They’re best friends now. A few months ago she wanted to kill him.”
Denim and Paisley grinned at each other and laughed in agreement. Tupelo nodded but his expression was uncertain.
I felt the same way. Stealing a 5k was not the same as stabbing someone in the heart. How do you get over something like that?
********************************************************
Pinkerton Floyd
Happyville town center
“I look ridiculous,” Mercy grumbled as she
straightened her t-shirt self-consciously. It’s bubblegum pink and has my grinning face on the front with the words ‘TEAM PINKERTON’. The back says ‘I Dream of Pink’.
“I disagree,” I’m laughing so hard I can barely talk. “You’ve never looked better.”
The lights in the town center are all pink. The park benches are now painted pink. There are pink balloons everywhere. We even have a cotton candy machine which only distributes pink candy of course.
I decided our team should have a name. And there was no better name I could think of than Team Pinkerton. Mercy had to agree with me. I mean that literally. She owed me. Twice. Remember? Man, life is good!
“I hate you,” she hissed. She’s a little peeved that the team isn’t called ‘Mercy’s Ninjas’. Really! That’s what she wanted to call us.
“Well, you’re the only one. The rest of the town loves me,” I’m not exaggerating. It’s the truth. “And they love all the pink.”
“Why aren’t you wearing one of these stupid t-shirts,” she asked bitterly. I don’t know why she’s so angry. Everybody else was thrilled to wear the shirts.
I point to my face and say, “Honey, I am the t-shirt.”
She gives me a disgusted look and says, “Shut up! And don’t ever call me ‘honey’ again.” When I open my mouth to argue she interrupts. “Ever!”
I just shrug because it’s not even worth arguing. We both know I’ll say what I say when I say it. No point in wasting breath on it.
When the new neon ‘Think Pink!’ sign lights up Mercy grinds her teeth and rolls her eyes so far back in her head I worry they may actually get stuck that way. “That is the stupidest thing I have ever seen,” she yells.
I’m sure you can translate that just fine on your own but just in case. What she’s actually saying is ‘I’m so jealous I could spit nails’. Mercy loves glittery things, sparkly things but she loves light up things most of all.
She’s gonna love me in a minute. Really. Just wait for it. It’s coming. The new neon sign posted over the record shop flickers on. It’s a huge pink heart with the words “Mercy + Pink’ inside it.
When she sees it her eyes light up. I made sure her name was in green so it would stand out. “That one’s so big,” she whispered in awe. It was really ostentatious. That’s how I knew she would like it.
“Do you like it,” I ask. It doesn’t even matter what she says. Her expression tells me everything I need to know.
“It’s okay. I’m glad my name is listed first. After all, I am the true leader of this team,” she sniffs. Oh, yeah. She loves it.
“You’re the leader of Team Pinkerton? I don’t think so. But you are a valuable member. I would even go so far as to say cherished hence the heart.”
Just as Mercy was about to lay into me Titus and Julia pull up to the curb. Uh-oh. I scoot closer to Mercy and drop my arm over her shoulder. She’s stiff as a board under my arm but she doesn’t pull away. Her eyes are burning holes into Julia.
Julia Caesar climbs out of the SUV and Titus hurries to follow suit. He makes his way around the vehicle to put his own arm around Julia. The tension in the air is thick but I can’t tell if it’s because of the females or because Titus and I are so anxious.
Julia looks really uncomfortable. I guess I would be too if the person I’d stabbed in the heart and left for dead was suddenly alive and standing in front of me.
“Mercy, I’m so glad to see you,” Julia murmurs nervously. She was actually fidgeting with her belt which is not like her at all.
“Really,” Mercy asks with a raised brow. She’s actually way calmer than I expected her to be.
Julia looks over to Titus for reassurance. He squeezes her arm comfortingly and she continues. “Yes. I regretted what happened so much. Immediately after it was done I was filled with so much regret.”
“Was that before or after you wanted to burn my body,” Mercy coolly inquires.
Julia looks at me with a tinge of annoyance. I shake my head. That was all on her.
“I was so angry. I hope you can understand that. After it happened. After I got home I wished I could change it. Take it all back. But it was too late.” When Mercy doesn’t say anything, she continues. “At least we thought it was too late.”
Julia glances at Titus again. “We’re the reason you’re here now. Titus and I arranged for you to come back.”
I can feel Mercy trembling under my arm. I’m not sure if it’s anger or sorrow but I tighten my grip. “And how exactly did you do that,” she asks skeptically.
“We hired a witch to raise you from the dead. Right before your second blog post went live,” Julia explains. She says it as though she expects Mercy to thank her.
“You did,” Mercy asks. Her tone is breathless because she’s fighting to free herself from my grip. I let go reluctantly but stay close just in case.
Julia frees herself from Titus and approaches hesitantly. Her arms are outstretched as though to hug Mercy.
Mercy walks forward slowly then faster. It all happens so fast I don’t even have time to react. First Mercy’s running to Julia and the next thing I know she’s pinning her to the ground.
For a moment Titus and I watch dumbfounded as Mercy, seated on Julia’s chest, pounds Julia’s head against the ground. “You tried to kill me,” she shouts at the top of her lungs. “That witch didn’t bring me back! I brought myself back!!”
Titus goes to grab Mercy and I grab him instead. “Don’t touch her!”
Titus’ eyes are huge. “Don’t touch her? She’s bashing my girl’s head in,” he growls as he swings at me.
“Yeah? Well she deserves it,” I mutter as I kick him in the knee and drop him to the ground beside Julia. I don’t have time to be proud of myself. Titus has me in a headlock before I can blink. I feel myself losing consciousness. My last thought is ‘Damn he’s strong.’
13
Chapter Thirteen
Is it wrong that I’m rooting for the Mad Zombie to off Queen Z?
I don’t really care!
If Titus the Twisted goes back on the market, I call dibs.
-Bibidee Bea’s post to the Zombie fan forum
Mercy Mayhem
Fight Night!
I guess it’s true what they say about anger giving you strength because, no joke, I hammered Julia Caesar. I don’t think that would have been possible if I hadn’t been so enraged.
I’d still be working her over if Tupelo hadn’t arrived and pulled me off of her. She’s a little bruised and I’m pretty sure her head will be ringing for days but she’ll live. I mean, I didn’t stab her in the heart. Even if I had, she’d still live. Apparently Zombies are built to last. Forever!
I don’t know what happened. My game plan was to play it cool. Listen to what she had to say and act like I didn’t care. I started off exactly as I meant to. Then she started talking and I felt all that buried resentment start to rise from where I’d buried it deep inside me.
When she tried to take credit for my comeback I just lost it. I didn’t need her to save me! I did that all by myself. I’m supposed to feel grateful that she consorted with a witch to try and bring me back?
She set aside her contempt for all things magical and attempted some kind voodoo spell to raise the sisterhood. That’s supposed to make me happy? Sniff. It doesn’t. Really! The sisterhood is dead. Deader than dead! I don’t even miss it. Not much anyway. I mean, not at all! Sisterhoods are overrated. Right?
Titus is fawning over Julia like I’d pulled her head off. Geez! I gave her a couple of head taps. No big deal.
“You need to learn to control your temper,” he sends a glare in my direction.
“Save the speech for her. She’s the one who stabbed me in the heart,” I remind him.
“And you knew she was going to do it,” added Pinkerton from beside me. He’s glaring just as hard at Titus. Suddenly I don’t mind the t-shirt so much.
Titus looked at me regretfully. “I tried to talk her out of it.” He’s
rubbing his beard so hard I’m surprised he hasn’t pulled it off.
“Not good enough,” growled Pink. “You should have told me so I could get Mercy out of there. Give Julia some time to cool down.” He’s getting really worked up. I pat his arm to settle him down.
Titus nodded. “You’re right. I should have. I’m sorry that I didn’t.” He looks at me again. “It’s just that night was so crazy. I honestly didn’t even think she’d go through with it.”
I could feel Julia’s gaze on me but I’m not ready to look at her.
“Can’t you at least try to forgive her,” of course Mary Mary would say that. “For the sisterhood,” she says.
“The sisterhood is dead,” I declare. Out of the corner of my eye I see Julia flinch.
“Give it a rest, Mercy. The sisterhood is as alive as it ever was,” was Carmony’s impatient response. “We are all part of the sisterhood. It’s not just you and Julia. It may have been tested but it’s not dead.”
I don’t remember Carmony being so vocal. I look at her. She looks a whole lot of annoyed. I think we have some catching up to do.
“Fine. The sisterhood lives but I’m still angry with Julia.”
“You have a right to be,” Julia admitted. “I’m sorry Mercy. You’ll never know how sorry I am.”
I sniff. “You should be. It hurt like hell,” I complain and spare her a tiny glance. So small it hardly counted.
“We need a girl’s night,” Kailani announces.
I look at her hopefully. “Really? Like tonight?”
“Sure, no time like the present,” she says.
“I’m in,” Julia agrees. “But there needs to be alcohol and lots of it. My ears are still ringing from the head bashing you gave me.”
“Booya! Who’s Queen of the Zombies now,” I ask.
“Still Julia,” Titus replied.
“Nobody’s talking to you Titus,” he always has to put his two cents in.
“Does it have to be females only? Can’t we all participate,” asked Abel. Caine nodded in agreement. Of course.