The Portal to Sidhe: Book 3

by Kelsey Schaeffer

  When the crowd finally grew quiet, I handed Benny the queen’s crown and said quietly, “I give this to you in trust that you will find a wonderful queen to someday rule by your side.” As I handed him the crowd, I felt more tears falling from my eyes as I smiled hopefully at his beautiful, sweet girlfriend. With the crown in his hand and tears falling from his eyes, Benny wrapped his arms around me as the crowd once more went wild.

  With Ben still tight in my embrace, Damon announced to the crowd that the ball had begun. Finally, as the crowd began to thin, Benny let me go and returned to his date.

  Damon smiled at me politely as he held his arm out for me and guided me the rest of the way down the staircase. When we reached the bottom, Damon quickly headed off as Ben was waiting patiently to guide me into the ball.

  The rest of the ball was just as spectacular as the other balls had been. I danced and swayed as Ben constantly remained by my side. When the band played older slow tune, I dragged my aging father to the dance floor, so he could have a good time. During more romantic slow songs, I swayed in Ben’s embraced as I watched my parents dance as if they were still young again. When faster, more modern tunes were played, my son pulled me to the dance floor as I tried to keep up with his quick feet. I even danced with Damon for a few moments once, before my good friend Garmond stole me away. In between dances, I was sipping on champagne and laughing with my wonderful friends and family, and by the end of the night I was buzzed more on happiness than champagne.

  When the last song dreadfully came to an end, I realized that only a few individuals were left including Ben, Damon and my son. As my son laughed at my slight intoxication, I decided it was time for me to drift off to bed. I told my son to enjoy the rest of his night as Ben and I headed back to our room. As the two of us waltzed towards the staircase, I realized that Damon was following close behind us, and when we reached the top of the stairs, I felt a sudden longing to talk to my first husband.

  I told Ben I would join him soon, as I stopped and waited for Damon to reach my side. I followed Damon as he opened the door and stepped in his guest suite.

  “Is everything okay,” he asked, as my face was obviously flush from dancing and a bit too much liquor.

  “Yes!” I smiled, as I suddenly felt dizzy and leaned against him.

  “Sit down Miranda. I think you had a bit too much to drink.”

  “Yes, yes. I think you’re right.” I giggled. “I am just so happy for our son.”

  “He’s your and Ben’s son,” Damon said quietly.

  “He’s yours too Damon. He loves you, and he couldn’t have become king without your guidance.”

  Damon nodded his head, but looked uncomfortable by my presence. The two of us had hardly been alone in the last ten years, and rarely even talked unless it was regarding our children or the realm.

  As I swayed around, pretending I was still dancing the night away, Damon quickly guided me to a sofa and sat by my side. As soon as I was seated, I automatically fell against him. Damon was completely still as my body pressed against his, and he seemed uncomfortable by my presence.

  I’m not sure if it was the alcohol or my emotion from the news of his departure, but I quickly moved my face next to his and pressed my lips against the skin of his lips.

  As I began to kiss his soft pink lips, full of love and passion, Damon softly pulled away and moaned, “Miranda.”

  I pressed myself back towards him, but he once again pulled away.

  “Take off my clothes,” I said softly. “Take me to bed.”

  Damon shook his head reluctantly, but it clear by the look in his eye that he didn’t want to turn me away. He was just about to give in, when something held him back.

  “Damon please. I want this,” I moaned.

  Damon shook his head as I clumsily fell against him once again.

  “I don’t want to get between Ben and you,” he said.

  “But you’re my husband,” I replied.

  He shook his head while I still leaned against him. Frustrated and tipsy, I clumsily stood up, reached my hand behind me and tried to unzip my dress. As I stumbled around, Damon watched for a moment before he stood up and tried to pull my hand away.

  “Miranda, please.” he said, “Stop.”

  I looked at him with pleading eyes and said, “Damon, it’s been ten years. I still love you. Just be with me. Please. I don’t want to lose you.”

  He stood still, not moving an inch as I tried once more to unzip my stubborn dress. To my surprise, I suddenly felt my fingers guide the zipper down the back of my dress. As soon as my dress broke loose, it fell to the floor, exposing my bare body, as I was wearing nothing underneath.

  Damon stood still as he looked unsure of what to do now that I was so exposed. He quickly gazed up and down my body that had changed very much over the last ten years. My once thin body, had filled out quite a bit after four children. Though I kept myself fit, I was much curvier than I had been the last time Damon had seen me naked. As he stared at me in awe with his mouth slightly ajar, I quickly pressed my lips against his once more.

  “Miranda, no,” he moaned through his kiss, but he didn’t pull away.

  As his lips pressed against mine, and my undressed body pressed against him, I could feel he was growing aroused through his tuxedo. I pulled off his blazer and threw it to the floor as my fingers found their way to his pants zipper. I quickly took off his pants as he relentlessly unbuttoned his shirt, and moments later, the two of us stood only in the moonlight, completely undressed.

  As he picked me up and carried me to the bed, he whispered, “Won’t Ben worry?”

  As alcohol still buzzed through my veins, I said, “I don’t think so,” and I shook my head.

  The moment I lay on the bed, he crawled above my body as his mouth grazed my breast and his hands caressed down my sides. As he began to pleasure me with only the touch of fingers, I moaned, feeling like it was our first time.

  As he touched and kissed every part of my body, I moaned in pleasure as my body begged for more, until he finally crawled on top of me. As I felt him lower himself on top of me, our bodies screamed for one another as we were just about to make love, but suddenly he stopped and rolled away.

  “Damon!” I cried in frustration, “Why did you stop?”

  “Miranda, I can’t...I just can’t.”

  “Yes you can! Ben agreed to this. I know it’s been ten years, but we all agreed to this.”

  “It’s not Ben,” Damon said quietly. He was obviously frustrated by the sudden end to our passion as I could see he was still heavily aroused, but something was holding him back.

  “Damon, why? Why did you have to stop? Why are you leaving me?”

  Damon remained still as he held up a flimsy wall between our obvious chemistry for one another, but as my frustration began to fade away, I felt my eyes grow heavy as the champagne took its toll on my body. I blinked a few times before the alcohol won its battle against my sleep, and the world went dark for the remainder of the night.

  Chapter 3

  I quickly awoke to the sound of someone thumping on the bedroom suite door.

  “Damon?” I heard a voice call out faintly from the other side of the door. As soon as I heard the voice, I instantly knew it was Ben. As my mind awoke, I realized I was buried under the blankets completely undressed, as Damon lay naked by my side.

  Just as quickly as I awoken, Damon was already sitting up, listening to the tapping on the door.

  “I have to answer the door,” Damon said softly.

  “Damon, he can’t see me like this.”

  “Don’t worry. Nothing happened last night...I mean I guess it did, but we didn’t make love. We only...”

  As my fuzzy mind began to piece together the events from the night before, I remembered everything that occurred before I had fallen asleep. Damon and I had shared an intimate moment, but refrained from going all the way.

  “Go to the bathroom,” Damon commanded. “I’ll talk to him.
”

  As Damon pulled himself out of bed, I watched him quickly throw on a pair of pajamas, and I grew confused about the evening before. I knew he wanted to make love to me, but something stopped him as he left us both only partially satisfied.

  I quickly ran to the bathroom and wrapped myself in a towel as I shut the door most of the way. Only a second after shutting the door, I heard Ben enter Damon’s suite.

  “Damon have you seen Miranda? She never came to the room last night, and she had a little more to drink than normal. I have been worried all night.”

  “She stayed with me last night,” Damon said reluctantly. “She’s upset, and you’re right...she had too much to drink.”

  There was silence for a moment.

  “We didn’t make love,” Damon spoke up. “There was a moment between the two of us...but we didn’t. I swear on that.”

  “I believe you,” Ben said quietly. “But if you did...you have every right. She’s your wife too.”

  “Not anymore,” Damon said in a regretful tone. “I mean...there won’t be a divorce...we can’t. It’s too complicated, but it’s over between us. She’s all yours now Ben; it’s the way it was always meant to be.”

  “She still loves you Damon,” Ben said. “I’m not going to lie and say I’m not happy you’re ending it—”

  “I get it,” Damon huffed.

  “But Damon...you don’t have to do this. We’re a family now. This whole thing is weird, but you’re like a brother to me...or something. I don’t know...but really.”

  “Ben, I’m her security blanket, and that’s all I’ve ever been. She made love to me out of pity. She never wanted me. You’re all she desires.”

  It felt like a dagger was sliced through my heart as I listened to the words Damon spoke about me. I felt guilt and remorse that I hadn't been the wife Damon needed. I felt guilty that I gave Ben all my passion, and only gave Damon what was left behind, but he was wrong; I didn’t make love to him in pity. I loved them both so much, yet I was still confused in so many ways. Now I was losing Damon.

  A few days after Benny’s coronation, our large family met in the sitting room for Damon to announce his departure. Damon, Ben and I sat on our large couch, as I sat between thee two. Benny sat on the wingback chair as he fed Isabella a bottle, and Alice and Luke were lying on the floor—cuddled together against the couch.

  As Alice and Luke giggled and laughed, Damon cleared his throat ready to speak up. “Children,” he began. Alice and Luke immediately looked his way, and Ben gazed at his stepfather with respect. “I have an announcement to make.”

  Luke looked excited, as if his father had a great surprise for him, but Damon wasn’t smiling, only a grim look upon his face.

  Damon looked at our children nervously as he began to speak, “Kids, I’m just going to come right out and say this. I’m moving to earth to be with your grandparents.”

  “I don’t wanna move to Earth!” Alice moaned, “I like it here.”

  “Honey, Daddy is going alone,” I said softly.

  Everyone fell silent. It was Luke who began to scream. “Noooooooo!” he wailed.

  Ben and I jumped at the same time, as Damon sat looking in great pain.

  “It’s okay baby,” I whispered as I scooped Luke into my arms as he began beating his fists into my shoulders.

  “Don’t hit your mother,” Ben said in a soft tone as I tried to calm my son down.

  “Luke!” Damon screamed, “Enough!”

  As I held Luke in my arms, he looked at Damon with a strange, hateful glare, and his blue eyes caught fire as they burned into him full of spite.

  Damon loved his son, but didn’t know Luke as well as Ben and I did. Luke’s hateful glare terrified his father.

  Damon stood up nervously and said, “Luke, I’m just going to live there and help your grandparents until you become king. I’ll come back as often as I can to see you, and in a few years, you can come to Earth and stay with me. I’ll help train you to be king—just like I did with Benny.

  Luke’s grunted and his hateful glare didn’t change. He continued staring hatefully at his birth father and said, “I don’t want you to train me to be king! I want Benny to.”

  As Luke threw a fit, I looked at my other children to see how they were handling the news. Benny appeared concerned, but had a look of understanding for his stepfather. Alice looked content—even happy as if this news meant nothing to her. I wasn’t surprised by Alice’s reaction, as Damon had never treated his stepdaughters as well as he treated his stepson Benny. Damon was a different person when Benny was born, and Damon had loved him as his own child. Even though Luke was Damon’s biological son, he had always treated Benny the very best.

  After a very uncomfortable conversation with our children, Luke stormed off, slamming the door to his room, while Damon trailed behind him. Alice headed back upstairs, completely unaffected by the news, but Benny stood up and gave me a heartbroken look. I could see that pain was written all over his face, as Benny was the closest to Damon of all my children.

  “He has to,” I said quietly as Benny looked at me with pain.

  “I know Mom,” he said, “I know.”

  In only one week’s time, our very full house of seven, shrunk to only five. Damon moved to Earth, and Benny moved to the royal suite, where Damon and I first lived when we moved to Sidhe.

  As promised, Damon returned to Sidhe at least once a week to spend a night with his children. Each time he returned, he appeared changed a little more. His loss of weight was the first thing I noticed, but as a man who had once dressed in only the finest attire, he was beginning to dress sloppier and sloppier. From mostly wearing dress suites on a daily basis, my husband’s attire devolved until he wore nothing but old worn out jeans and stained up tee shirts. Only a year ago, his thick blond hair was persistently neatly trimmed and styled, but now it was growing long and straggly.

  On one particular visit, nearly a year after he moved away, he returned through the portal with a woman I had never seen before. As he stood besides her, his rumpled hair appeared greasy, and patches of fuzz heavily shadowed his typically clean-shaven face. Once Damon and the mystery woman arrived inside our home, he told me he had a big announcement to make. Despite his scruffy appearance, he was smiling and looked the happiest I had seen him in quite some time.

  The woman who was accompanying him was tiny with strawberry blond hair, and she looked quite young. She gave me a pleasant, yet nervous smile, as she looked me up, appearing anxious of my presence.

  “Miranda can you get the kids?” Damon asked as soon as we entered the living room together. Ben was sitting on the couch reading, while Isabella sat on the floor playing with toys.

  “I guess,” I sighed feeling aggravated that he couldn’t get them himself.

  “I’ll get Benny,” Ben said as he quickly left the room.

  I quickly called Alice and Luke to the living room, and returned to my seat, where we all sat quietly, waiting for Ben to return with our son.

  As soon as the Benny entered the living room, Damon jumped out of his seat, and gave him an awkward handshake. He hugged Luke and even Alice—who looked as if she didn’t want to be touched. But it saddened me when he ignored Isabella’s presence.

  “Beautiful children,” the young woman said as she giggled nervously while Damon took a seat.

  I nodded my head, feeling quite unsure of the young woman.

  Finally, Damon moved to the edge of his seat and let out a nervous cough, before he began to speak, “I wanted to gather you here today to introduce my...” He looked around the room nervously at all of us before he continued, “my girlfriend Gabby.”

  The room was completely silent and still. Even Isabella sensed something strange and grew quiet.

  Finally I stood up and looked at Damon straight in the eye, “We need to talk. In my room!” I turned around and marched towards the stairs, leaving the others behind. Without ever turning around, I knew Damon was following me, as
I heard his footsteps closely behind.

  “Miranda, I can explain,” Damon said when we reached the top of the staircase, but I kept walking until we reached the room Damon had once shared. We stepped inside and I shut the door behind him. “Miranda,” he said.

  “Damon,” I began. “I don’t even know what to say.” I sighed and took a few deep breaths before I exploded. Finally I said, “First of all. This should have been between you and I before you told all the kids. It was enough that you left, but now a girlfriend. I can’t believe you!” I screamed.

  “Miranda, I let you have Ben. I thought it only fair.”

  “Only fair!” I hissed as I felt my face turn hot and red. “First, Ben and I had a child together—long before you and I were ever together, and second, the three of us talked and agreed to this. How long have the two of you even been together.”

  “Two years,” he whispered.

  “TWO YEARS!” I screamed.

  “Miranda, please. I would have told you, but I didn’t know how, and with Desmorelda’s appearance...I didn’t want to put this on you. Miranda…oh I don’t know how to tell you this.”

  “What,” I said hatefully.

  “Well, at first...it was just sex.”

  “Sex!” I screamed feeling disgusted.

  “Miranda, please,” he said. “You pushed me away for years. I couldn’t take it anymore. Before Gabby, you were the only woman I had even been with, but you were so wrapped up with the kids and Ben...and I have been so busy with Sidhe, and even Pine Lake at times. I had needs Miranda...it wasn’t even about sex. I just wanted to be touched and to feel loved—”

  “Damon I had been right here for ten years! You just had to tell me you wanted me…you needed me, and I would have been there. I love you Damon.”

  “And I love you Miranda. I don’t love Gabby—”

  “Then end it. Come back home. We can be a family. I’ll be with you. I’ll split my time between you and Ben. We need you Damon.”

  “Miranda, I can’t.”

  “Why!” I hissed.

  “Because...because she’s pregnant.”