by E. L. Todd
“Congratulations!”
Her words made me cry again. “No…it’s not that.”
“Girl, what’s wrong? Why are you crying?”
“He didn’t propose…”
Skye was quiet for a long time. “What happened?”
“He gave me a bracelet instead. I thought he was going to propose but he gave me a bracelet. That’s what was in the box.” God, I felt so stupid.
“Oh…” Sadness was in her voice. “I’m sorry, Trinity. I was so certain—”
“So was I.” I took a deep breath and stilled my tears. “This trip is a disaster.”
“Don’t say that,” she said quietly. “Slade probably didn’t think you would think he was going to propose.”
“Then he’s a damn idiot.” I knew I was lashing out at him when he didn’t deserve it. “We’ve been dating for two years. Why hasn’t he asked yet?”
“I don’t know…maybe Cayson knows.”
“Don’t involve him,” I said. “He’ll tell Slade and I don’t want to talk to him about it.”
“Okay…I’m sorry.”
“It’s not your fault…”
“I got you all excited and I was totally wrong.”
“It’s okay, Skye. I assumed the same thing.”
“Well, maybe he wants to ask you in some other way.”
“Or maybe he doesn’t want to ask me at all…”
“That’s not true, Trinity. Slade loves you.”
He and I had come a long way, but he did say it would be difficult for him to commit to marriage. I just assumed since we’d been so close lately that he finally got over his commitment issues and he was ready to be serious. If not, why would he waste two years of my life? But what if I was wrong? “Yeah…I hope so.” I knew I’d been in the bathroom for a long time. “I have to go. I’ll talk to you later.”
“Okay. We’ll go shopping when you get home.”
“Okay.” I hung up then cleaned up my make-up. I really didn’t want to go back out there and sit across from Slade. I just wanted to fly home and get away from him. But I was trapped with him for another eighteen hours.
When I returned to the table, I tried to act normal.
Slade immediately examined me. “Everything okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine.” I forced a smile. “Did you pay the bill?”
“Yeah. Are you ready to go?”
“Sure.”
He took my hand, but it didn’t feel as warm as it used to. Did this touch mean the same to him as it did to me? Did any of this mean anything to him?
“You want to take a walk on the beach?” he asked.
“No, thanks.” I didn’t want to do anything with him.
“Okay. Just head back to the room?”
If we went to the room, I’d have to have sex with him. I didn’t want him to touch me. But if I said I wasn’t in the mood, he would know something was wrong. I didn’t have any other choice but to go through with it. “I guess.”
He eyed me for a moment. “You sure you’re okay?”
“Yeah,” I lied.
We returned to the room and I immediately washed off my make-up and tried to make myself look as hideous as possible so he wouldn’t want me. I purposely messed up my hair and made it look like I just came out of living in the forest.
He was already in bed when I returned. The lights were off.
He couldn’t see me so that was all a waste.
Slade grabbed me and yanked me to bed, searching for my mouth immediately. I kissed him back even though it was empty and passionless. I moved to my hands and knees so I wouldn’t have to look at him or kiss him while we had sex.
He grabbed me and turned me on my back, wanting to make love.
I turned back over. “I want it like this.”
He stilled for a moment then leaned over me. “Baby, are you sure everything is okay?”
“Yes. I just like it like this.” I tried to keep my pain and disappointment out of my voice. The more I thought about it, the more I realized Slade would never propose to me. I would be able to handle that a lot better if he hadn’t taken me on a romantic trip with a small box in his luggage. It hurt so much worse this way.
“Okay.” He didn’t ask me again. He moved inside me but it didn’t slide in like usual. I was as dry as a desert and just wanted to get this over with and go to sleep. Slade licked his hand then moistened his tip before he moved inside again. Then he rocked into me slowly.
I backed into him hard and fast, wanting to get him off as quickly as possible. He breathed hard, telling me he enjoyed it. He gripped my hips while he thrust into me.
I moved faster, wanting to end this.
“Baby, I’m not going to last if you keep fucking me like that.”
I realized he was waiting for me to come first. For the first time in our relationship, I faked it, pretending he was giving me everything I wanted. After I finished, he released inside me, moaning as he went.
Relieved it was over, I turned on my side and pulled the sheets over me. I just wanted to go to sleep and leave this twisted paradise the following day.
Slade cleaned off then snuggled beside me. He spooned me from behind and held me close.
It took all my effort not to kick him away. I lay still and tried to forget he was there.
He kissed my neck before he released a deep breath. “I love you, Trinity.”
It took everything I had to say it back. “I love you too.”
Chapter Seven
Cayson
While I wasn’t a doctor, work didn’t bore me. I was still helping people even if I wasn’t practicing medicine. It made me feel like I was making a difference in the world, fighting for the health of everyone in my country. It was a lot of responsibility, but at least I wasn’t frustrated about not being in medical school. Now that Skye and I were back together, there was no question I made the right decision. She was the light of my life. Without her, I’d rather be dead.
I applied for a transfer to NYU for medical school. I already completed three semesters and I had a lot of patient care hours. At least if I started school again, I wouldn’t have to completely start over. To my surprise, I received a letter from NYU accepting me and transferring credits from Stanford. I had a strong suspicion they wouldn’t have done that if I hadn’t come from such an esteemed school.
I hadn’t told Skye the great news yet. She seemed to be down about something, but I wasn’t sure what. Every time I asked, she just brushed it off.
I was about to leave for work when my boss called me into her office. She graduated from Yale and had a Ph.D. in microbiology as well as a master’s in public health. She was a gifted woman that taught me quite a few things.
“You wanted to see, Dr. Teisman?”
“Hello, Cayson. Take a seat.”
I sat behind her desk and patiently waited for her to speak.
She rested her hands on the desk. “I called you in here to discuss your work at the hospital.”
That didn’t sound good. Did I forget to turn off an incubator? Or did I mess up somewhere?
She smiled. “You did nothing wrong, Cayson. Actually, I have good news.”
“Oh, that’s a relief,” I said with a light laugh.
“A few of your colleagues told me you are applying to medical school. Is that true?”
“Yeah, I actually just got accepted to NYU. They transferred my credits from Stanford.”
She nodded. “So, you intend to leave us?”
Now I felt cornered. She was probably upset I applied for the job knowing I would leave eventually. That didn’t make me look good. But I refused to lie about it. “Yes.”
“Do you not like it here?”
“Of course, I do. I’ve always wanted to be a physician so that’s why I applied. It’s nothing personal.”
She nodded but didn’t seem pleased. “Honestly, Cayson, we love having you here and we don’t want you to leave. Your passion for helping people is obvious in your w
ork, and you’re one of the best scientists we’ve ever had. I would like to negotiate terms with you to keep you here with us.”
Whoa…was this really happening? I’ve never heard of this. “Oh…I don’t know what to say. I’m flattered.”
She gave me a smile. “This is what we’re prepared to offer you.” She pushed a letter toward me. “If you sign at the bottom, you agree to these terms. But please let me explain them.”
I didn’t touch the paper.
“The director of the CDC will be retiring in a few years. And his assistant is retiring in the next few weeks. We would give you the assistant position, which would involve a lot more responsibility, and when the director leaves, you will have his position.”
I couldn’t wrap my mind around this. Did she just say that? “Uh, forgive me, but I’m confused.”
“Ask your questions.”
“Doesn’t the director have a Ph.D.? Or several?”
“He does,” she said simply.
“And I just have a bachelor’s…in biochemistry. I don’t think I would qualify.”
“But your degree is from Harvard…and your volunteer hours, patient hours, and your work here show all of us how capable you are. I’ve met a lot of intelligent people, and you, by far, are the brightest.”
My cheeks flushed and I didn’t know what to say.
“If you accepted the position, you would make a significantly higher salary than any physician position you could ever find.”
“I don’t care about the money,” I said bluntly.
“Then what do you care about?”
“Well, I wanted to be a doctor so I could help people in other countries. A lot of people don’t have basic medical care. They don’t even have antibiotics or drugs. They’re struggling in so many parts of the world.”
She nodded slowly. “I understand now. Well, as the director, I think you would be helping a lot more people.”
“How so?”
“Who do you think approves all the donations of antibiotics, medical equipment, and health care to these foreign places? We do more than just quarantine deadly diseases and eradicate them. We prevent them from breaking out in the first place. Our mission is to treat those who have pathogens, and stop the spread of disease—forever. You may not directly perform a procedure on someone, but you’ll be more involved with their health care than you can possibly imagine. Cayson, believe me when I say you’ll achieve your dream by going this route. And more importantly, you won’t have to train for eight years to make it happen. And, while you may not care about the salary, most people would. You’ll have a comfortable lifestyle. If you don’t care for that, you can always give it away to charity. Basically, there are a lot more options for you here, with us, than if you leave.” She stared me down when she finished.
I still didn’t know what to say. “Wow, I’m very honored to be offered this position.”
“You don’t have to answer right this second. Take the offer letter and think about it for a few days. When you’re ready to discuss it, return to my office.”
I stood up and held the papers in my hands. “Thank you. I really appreciate it.”
“I hope I’ll be working with you soon.” She shook my hand then opened the door.
I stepped out, unable to believe that really just happened.
***
I went to Skye’s place directly after work, like usual. When I walked inside, I heard the shower running from down the hall. Eager to see her, I didn’t bother waiting for her to finish. I dropped my clothes then joined her.
“Hey, you.” She was shampooing her hair, looking like a wet dream as the suds moved down her skin and in the valley between her breasts.
“Hey, baby.” I gripped her hips and kissed her. My cock hardened the second I saw her. I loved her body. She’d gained back the weight she lost, and looked sexier than ever. I couldn’t get enough of her.
“How was work?”
“Insane.”
She raised an eyebrow. “That’s an odd way to describe it.”
“You’ll never believe what happened.”
“What?” she asked.
I told her everything Dr. Teisman said to me.
She froze and stared at me like I was crazy. “Are you joking?”
“No,” I said with a laugh. “They know I’ve been accepted into medical school and they don’t want me to leave.”
“That’s crazy…” She looked at me with fond eyes. “But not surprising.”
“I’m not sure what to do…”
She looked hesitant to give me advice. “Do what brings you the most joy.”
“Well, you already bring me the most joy.” I winked at her.
She smacked my arm playfully. “I’m serious.”
I shrugged. “Honestly, I’m not sure. She made a pretty compelling argument. I’m not sure if I’m only leaning toward medical school because it was my original plan since I was…like three or if I really want to do it. Maybe I should take this opportunity…maybe I shouldn’t.”
“I’ll support you either way,” she said.
“What do you think I should do?”
She turned off the shower. “I’m not answering that.”
“Why? I value your opinion.”
“I don’t want to sway you either way. You need to make this decision on your own. You know what’s best for you.”
“No, I don’t.”
She dried off then walked into her bedroom.
I followed her. “I need you to help me, Skye. You know me better than anyone.”
She shook her head. “Forget it.”
“Why?” I asked.
“Because you’ll take my advice literally. Whatever I think is best, you’ll pick it because you’ll think that will make me happier. This is about you, not me. If you want an objective opinion, ask Slade.”
“Slade’s an idiot. I can’t ask him about this.”
“He’s not an idiot,” she said defensively. “He’s very bright.”
Why was she being so touchy about Slade? “Of course I don’t actually think he’s an idiot. I just know this is out of his realm of expertise.”
“Then talk to your dad.”
“I want to talk to you! You’re my wife! I mean—future wife. We make these decisions together.”
She gave me a soft look before she turned away.
Even though we haven’t been together very long, I felt like we were back to normal, like we’d never been apart. I slept with her every night and spent almost all my free time with her. She was practically my wife already. “Now talk to me.”
She sighed. “I’ll guide you.”
“I don’t know what that means, but okay.”
“Which job makes more money?”
“You know I don’t—”
“Just answer the question.”
“CDC.”
“Which has better hours?”
I didn’t see why this was relevant. “CDC.”
“Which job will allow you to help more people?”
“Well, as a physician I can help one patient at a time. As the director for the Center for Disease Control, it could potentially be millions.”
She nodded. “Which will allow you to help people sooner?”
“CDC.”
She gave me a pointed look. “You have your answer, Cayson.”
I guess I did. “It’s hard to imagine my life not being a doctor…”
“Then be a doctor.”
I didn’t know what to think.
“Most people end up doing something they never expected, whether they like it or not. Plans fall through, and different doors open. Just because it wasn’t where you wanted to end up doesn’t mean it’s not better than the door you originally opened. Just keep an open mind. Even though being a doctor was your first choice doesn’t mean it’s the better choice.”
I nodded then sat on the edge of her bed.
She watched me for a moment before she sat beside me. “Doe
s that help?”
“Yes.”
She grabbed my hand. “What are you thinking?”
“There’s just one concern I have with the CDC. I have to address it before I make my final decision.”
“What is it?”
“Well, it sounds like an important job, which means it might require a lot of time. If it’s a position that causes me to work late all the time and never see you and our kids…then I won’t do it.”
“I hadn’t thought of that.”
“I want to help people but my family comes first. It always comes first.”
She smiled at me then kissed my cheek. “Think about it for a while. There’s no rush.”
“Okay.”
She caressed my knuckles with her thumb.
“You know what helps me think?” I whispered. I gave her a sinister grin.
“What?” She played along.
“Some hot and steamy sex.”
“Actually, I think that would just distract you from this important decision…”
“No, it’ll clear my head.”
She chuckled. “You’re pulling at empty threads here.”
I pushed her on the bed and crawled over her. “Well, let’s find out.”
***
When Slade returned from his vacation, I was desperate to know how it went. I called him all day but he never called me back. I left him messages but there was no response. His silence worried me.
Then he called me back around lunchtime. “Dude, what the hell is the emergency?”
“How’d the trip go? Did you give it to her in a box?”
“No, I listened to your stupid advice. You can calm the hell down.”
I breathed a sigh of relief. “So, she wasn’t mad?”
“No, she cried because she loved the bracelet so much. Then we had sex and went to bed.”
I was glad I freaked out over nothing. “So, you had a good trip, then?”
“It was awesome. The water was warm and we saw a sea otter.”
“Cool,” I said. “How was the food?”
“Awesome,” he said. “I want to go back. Working sucks.”
I laughed. “You’re telling me.”
“Since we’re talking, you want to meet for lunch?” he asked. “I’m headed for Mega Shake.”
“Sounds like a plan. I’ll see you in a few minutes.”