by Lila Rose
I took the steps to stand in front of him and cupped the side of his neck. “All that shit can wait. Take a moment for yourself.”
He glared. “I don’t need a moment. I have waited for this day for a long time. I need to move on from it.”
“No,” I stated.
His hands hit my gut, and he pushed at me. “You do not get to tell me what to do,” he snarled.
“Cowboy, get Mimi to her room. If you two need anythin’, I’ll be a couple of doors down to the left. Ryo, set up a meetin’ in a few hours,” I ordered while holding Taro’s scowl. Cowboy guided Mimi down the hall and away from this shit.
I knew Taro was hurting. Even though he hated the man, he was hurting, and he needed time to deal with it.
“Ryo, if you move, I will fire you.” Taro stepped to the side of me. “You came here for Mimi. Be there for her. I do not need your assistance.”
I clenched my jaw. “I came here for Mimi, but now I’m also here for you. Don’t push me away, Taro. I get it. I know you’re hurtin’—”
He snorted. “You know nothing.”
“I fuckin’ do,” I snapped. His jaw clenched, nostrils flaring. We’d talked and goddamn talked a lot recently, getting to know one another. Even when he refused to admit he was hurting, I knew differently. It still did because he had a heart. He cared. He was a good person. If he wasn’t, he wouldn’t be making the changes within the family as he had. I took a breath. “Taro,” I whispered, tugging him into my arms.
His hands gripped at my tee, yet he remained stiff, even with his forehead pressed to my chest.
“Come with me,” I told him. I took his hand in mine and nodded to Ryo, who returned it before he went the other way. I led Taro back to his room. He didn’t say a word, and when I glanced at him, he stared down at our clasped hands.
I closed the door in the room, and Taro walked off towards the balcony, pulling the door open with harsh movements. He stomped over to the railing and gripped the wrought iron as I stepped out after him. His head dropped, chin near his chest, and I witnessed his shoulders shifting up and down quickly with his fast breaths.
“Taro,” I uttered, resting my hands to his waist.
“I hated him,” he said softly.
“I know.”
“I hated him with every fibre of me.”
I shifted closer, moulding my front to his back. “I know.”
“He was a cruel man. A horrid, vile piece of shit.”
I hummed under my breath; he needed to get this out.
“I wished I had killed him years ago.” He sucked in a ragged breath. “I hated him.”
“Babe,” I said gently, tucking his hair behind his ear and kissing his neck.
“Fuck,” he groaned, the word full of pain. “I hated him, so why do I care?”
Sliding my arms around his waist, I told him, “Because you’re a better man than he ever was.”
I quickly moved to his side when he bent over, the pain too much. His forehead hit his hands on the railing. A strangled noise caught in his throat. I cupped the back of his neck, letting him know I wasn’t going anywhere. His body shook, but he was silent through the tears he allowed to fall.
Clenching my jaw, I rubbed at my stinging eyes. I hated seeing him in pain. Hated he was going through this over a man who didn’t deserve his anguish. All I could do was be there for him. Like I knew he would for me.
The connection between us grew every second, minute, hour, and day. It all drew me to one conclusion: I wanted to keep him.
Even after a few days of having him as mine, I didn’t want to see a day without him.
He was mine.
Chapter Fifteen
Wolf
It wasn’t protocol, but I no longer cared what my uncles thought. So Ruin walked beside me into the meeting that consisted of close cousins who oversaw the guns and drugs trade for me, and my two uncles. All men, of course.
Even if they hated Ruin was there, he would stay. I needed him close. He was my air in that moment and probably many more to come.
“What is the meaning of this?” Jiro demanded as he stood, his sons at his back. “He should not be in here.”
I didn’t reply until I was at the head of the table. “I don’t have to explain my ways to you, Jiro,” I told him. I stayed standing, eyeing the others around me. My cousins, who had moved to Australia because my aunts had wanted a better life for them, didn’t waver from my gaze. It was only my uncles who refused to keep my eyes. “As most of you would have heard already, my father passed early this morning. The funeral will take place in three days. I hope you will give the respect to my mother, sister, and me to take those days to mourn his loss.”
They didn’t need to know, but I had already grieved, so wouldn’t need more time. I refused to let any more hurt take hold of me over that man. But my mother would need it. She would want peace until the time came for the funeral without any family dramas arising.
“Kick him out, and I won’t cause any trouble,” Jiro snarled, crossing his arms over his chest.
“No,” I stated. “I am tired of you trying to give me orders, Jiro. This is your last warning.”
Jiro laughed. “My last warning?”
“That is what I said.”
“Jiro.” Akio stood. “Now is not the time. Our brother just passed. Have some respect.”
“Respect?” Jiro spat. “The family head should have some respect and not dishonour us by bringing his whore into a family meeting.”
Josh chuckled beside me as he crossed his arms over his chest.
Jiro’s gaze snapped to him. “Get out. Get the fuck out, now.”
Josh laughed once again. “You ever think you’re against men who like men because deep down you do?”
Shit. If I didn’t think Jiro would kill Josh for those words, I would have laughed, but I feared for Josh’s life. I placed a hand on Josh’s shoulder, but Jiro pulled a gun before I could say anything.
“No one disrespects me, especially not scum like you.”
Josh quickly flicked his arm out, his own gun raised and pointed at Jiro. “I’m gettin’ tired of you, old man.”
“You cannot shoot me,” Jiro said with a smirk.
“He can, if I give him permission to,” I added. “But for now, I want everyone to behave. Father just passed; did you have no respect for him?” I demanded.
Jiro ground his teeth together and lowered his weapon. “Your time to rule is coming to an end.”
“That a threat?” Josh snarled, clicking off the safety.
I moved my hand down to Josh’s arm and squeezed, but he either ignored it or didn’t feel it beneath the anger I saw burning in his eyes.
“You better rethink everythin’, old man, because it seems you’re forgettin’ your place and who backs Wolf. Not only does he have his men, but now he has the Hawks MC, and we don’t let anyone fuck with us.”
My heart gave a hard thunk in my chest. Josh offered his brothers as protection, and I knew he would call them if he thought I wasn’t safe. Emotions tightened inside me.
But didn’t the fool know I would do the same for him? I would protect him with anything and everything I had. Even from my own family. The Hawks MC was a clean club; my family wasn’t. Did he understand that? Did he know that being at my side could make him dirty by association? It was something I needed to make sure he understood.
But then, if I did, would I lose him?
Was it a risk I could take?
The thought of losing him shot fear to my chest and burned.
Jiro spat to the side and then strode from the room, his sons following. It showed he had respected my father enough to not continue this right then. I dropped my hold on Josh and looked to Uncle Akio, who moved around his chair and pushed it in. He dipped his head. “I am sorry for your loss, Wolf.”
“Thank you.”
He left without another word, his only son following after him. My other cousins stayed until I released them with a rem
ark of speaking about business later. The room quieted until Josh turned to me, a stormy expression on his face. “I hate your uncle.”
A warm smile lifted my lips. Reaching out, I slid my hand to the side of his neck. “Thank you for looking out for me. He’s not very liked by many.”
“Good. He’s a dick, and I’ll always have your back.”
Would he though?
While he understood my family dealt with illegal businesses, I wasn’t sure if he really comprehended how much trouble that brought to the Takahashi family. There were many out there who wanted the trade we had and would do anything to get it, meaning my life was always at risk. It was why Ryo didn’t leave my side unless asked, and I already knew he would be standing outside those doors. He would have heard everything and run in if something happened. I could defend myself easily against the family, but the other people interested in the business would bring many to take me out.
It had happened before, and no doubt it would happen again. I didn’t like the thought of Josh being in the middle of my mess when he could get caught up in the crossfire and be harmed.
A storm was coming now that Father had passed. Some competitors would think it the ideal situation to move in and try to take what was ours. I had to be cautious, even more so now.
Maybe the right thing to do was to send Josh away. Not only him, but Mother, my cousins—Jiro’s daughters—and Mimi. I needed to make sure they were safe before the thunderclouds hit.
So why did the thought of having Josh leave hurt my heart?
For the first time, I didn’t know what to do.
“Hey,” Josh uttered, stepping closer to me.
I blinked and met his gaze.
“Where did you just go?” he asked, reading me so well.
Smirking, I shook my head. “Nowhere really.”
“What do you need?”
You.
Only you.
The realisation had my eyes widening. I didn’t understand how it happened so quickly, but I was well on my way into falling for Joshua.
“What?” Josh demanded, his hands tightening on my waist.
Shaking my head, I ran my hands down to his stomach and rested my forehead against his chest. “Nothing.”
“Taro,” he growled in the back of his throat. I loved it.
“Joshua,” I replied with a smile.
“Babe, what’s goin’ on?”
“Honestly, I’m finding everything a lot to take in right at this moment.” The family, the business, my father’s death, and my feelings for Josh.
“Then don’t.”
A chuckle fell from me. “If only it was that easy.”
“It is. Take today for yourself. No one will think bad of you for it. Shit, every boss has time off. You have people at your back to help you. Let them.”
I couldn’t remember the last day where I wasn’t doing something for the businesses or family. There was still so much to do.
“The funeral’s organised, right? Already has been for a long time. Business stuff can wait until after the funeral. Babe, you need this. Let me take care of you.”
“How?”
He chuckled. “By telling Ryo to run things while we rest in the bedroom. It’s all for you, of course.”
Grinning, I lifted my head. “Of course.”
“What do you say?”
How could I say no since Josh was right? I could use the time without family and business.
The door opened, and Ryo stuck his head in. “I agree with Ruin,” he stated.
Snorting, I rolled my eyes. “I knew you would.” Taking Josh’s hand, I started towards the door. “All right, I’ll take some time, but if anything comes up….”
“I will contact you,” Ryo replied.
“Yes.” I looked at Josh. “Also, can we go and see my mother and Mimi?”
He smiled. “Yeah, Taro.”
Taro. I did love hearing him say my name.
Mother had been sleeping when I checked on her, but she was in good hands with our aunt. She was my mother’s sister, after all. When we arrived at Mimi’s room, the man I had half noticed before comforting her outside Father’s room opened the door. He wore a Hawks MC patch. Seeing it reassured me my sister was in good company. Josh wouldn’t have had one of his brothers be here for her without knowing there was something between them.
Though I had thought Mimi was still getting over Josh, so who was this man to her?
“Hey,” he whispered with a chin lift.
“Cowboy, this is Taro, Mimi’s brother. We’re stoppin’ in to check on her,” Josh explained.
“Nice to meet you officially, but Mimi’s havin’ a rest right now,” Cowboy said to me before his gaze dropped to our clasped hands. I tried to pull mine away, but Josh held strong.
Wasn’t he worried about what his friend would think?
I wanted to look at him, to know what he was thinking, but I didn’t. Instead, I replied, “You also. Though, I would like to know how you’ve become close to my sister.”
His face flushed. It was strangely endearing coming from a biker, especially when he stammered, “W-Well… um, you see….”
Josh chuckled. “Cowboy’s from Ballarat. They’ve been gettin’ close before Mimi came here.”
“Don’t worry. I’ll take care of her.”
“Good. Because I would hate to kill a brother to Ruin,” I told him.
Cowboy chuckled, until he looked at both of our straight faces. “Wait, you actually mean that.”
Josh sighed. “He does.” He pulled our hands up and kissed the back of mine. “But I’ll keep him under control.”
It was my turn for my cheeks to burn. Josh really didn’t care how he acted in front of a brother, even when it was so out of character for him and would shock people who knew him. I heard Cowboy choke on his own saliva, but I couldn’t look away from the man beside me.
He really didn’t care.
It surprised me to the point of warmth, the sensation attacking my head, heart, and soul in all the good, mushy ways.
“You two…?”
“Yeah, brother. But don’t tell anyone, since I haven’t.”
Cowboy nodded. “Got it.”
“Tell Mimi we’ll do dinner,” I ordered.
“Okay,” I heard him say before I dragged Josh towards our room.
Our room.
It was no longer mine. But ours.
Again, how did it happen so fast?
Because he’s different from anyone I have been with before.
“Where’s the fire?” Josh huffed out a laugh.
Opening the door, I waved off the guards from checking the room and strode in, slamming the door behind us. I wrapped my arms around Josh’s neck and kissed him like it would be our last. I pushed everything I felt into the kiss and deepened it, drawing out a moan from the man in my arms. He gripped me tightly around the waist. I never wanted it to end. I could do this every day and night for the rest of my life because his mouth, his body, his heart and soul were made for me.
He was mine.
Mine.
Breaking the kiss, we tried to catch our breaths as we stared into each other’s gazes. Josh brushed his fingers through my hair.
“You’re fuckin’ gorgeous.”
Shit. My heart couldn’t take any more. It was already full.
But I couldn’t lose him.
I couldn’t.
If I had to give things up for him, I would. It wouldn’t be easy, but he would be worth it.
“What are you thinkin’?”
“That I want to suck your dick.”
Several noises dropped from him at the same time, a snort, laugh, and groan. “Jesus, Taro.”
Sliding a hand down, I palmed his hardness behind his jeans. I smirked. “Look who’s ready.”
“I’m not sure—”
“If you deny me this, pet, I’ll pout all day long while I go back to work.”
Another chuckle left him while he shook his head
. “You’re crazy.”
“Just a little.”
He cupped my cheeks. “Taro, you don’t have to distract yourself with that. We don’t even have to talk. We can sit around and watch stupid shit while doin’ nothin’.”
I lifted my hands to grip his wrists. “I’m not doing this to distract myself. I want to because you make me feel so much. Selfishly, I want to pleasure you in ways where you’ll never want a woman to touch you again, because all you can do is think about me, my mouth, and body.”
His grin was wide. “How can I argue with that?”
Smirking, I winked. “You can’t, so remove these pesky jeans and sit on the bed.”
“Yes, sir.” He dipped to brush his lips against mine.
“Oh, pet, I like hearing sir from your mouth way too much.” He made me happy, lighter than I had ever felt. I would never get enough of him.
Josh chuckled as he walked over to the bed. I stood back and watched when he faced me and undid the top button. He paused.
“Don’t be a tease now. My mouth is already watering from thinking of having a taste of you,” I told him, my tone huskier than normal, driven by lust.
Josh’s eyes heated, his nostrils flaring, desire riding him. Quickly, he slid the zipper down before he pushed his jeans and boxers low and kicked them off. His cock bounced free, already hard and ready for me. I bit my bottom lip, my body heating even more when he pulled his tee from his body.
God, he was beautiful.
Josh sat on the edge of the bed and spread his legs with a wicked grin on his lips.
My heart beat wildly in my chest as I undid the buttons of my shirt while I stepped over to the bedside table and took out the lube, placing it in the pocket of my pants. Josh watched me but said nothing, though I could see the pulse at his throat beat crazily.
I stepped in front of him and bent to capture his lips. His fingers threaded into my hair and gripped. Our mouths attacked, our tongues tangled, and I ran both hands over his warm back, shoulders, then arms. Josh tried to drag me down on top of him, but I broke the kiss and shook my head. Instead, I dropped to my knees between his legs.
My eyes drank him in as I reached out to palm his dick, drawing out a groan and pre-cum at the tip. I licked the latter away and caught Josh’s hands clutching the sheets.