Tinsel

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Tinsel Page 3

by Kris Bryant


  “Bring lunch. I’m broke.”

  * * *

  “You’re actually embarrassing yourself.”

  Mo was on the floor snuggling with Catmas, cooing at her, petting her, kissing her tiny face. “Hello, sweet baby girl. Did you find a new home? Are you happy here?” Catmas purred and rubbed her head on Mo’s jaw and cheek. “And we definitely need to come up with a better name.”

  I nudged Mo with my foot. “We can call her Kitty. That’s what we’ve been calling her.”

  Mo turned and faced Catmas again. “No, not this sweet baby. She needs a princess name like Sheba or Cleopatra.”

  “Those are dumb names.”

  Mo rolled on her back and looked up at me. “Really? You’re going to tell me that?”

  I handed her a plate with half a sandwich and chips. “I’m sure between the two of us, we can find a better name.”

  Two hours later, a rom com under our belt and Catmas sprawled between us on the couch, we were at a loss. None of the names fit her. Fluffikins, Buttercup, Abby, Sissy, Libby, Angel. They were boring. I had to admit, Catmas was adorable the more I got to know her.

  “Well, I need to get back. Angie’s going to yoga, and I have baby duty.” Mo picked up Catmas and kissed her little nose.

  “I’m going to get the tree out and see how Catmas does. If she tries to climb it, I’ll take it back down.”

  “Christmas is three weeks away. Get moving. And I’m sure she’ll be fine with it. Did you go through all your grandma’s ornaments yet?”

  When my grandmother went into assisted living, she gave me all her decorations. Most of them were things my brother and I had made her, but she had some valuable collector stuff. “I have things that I know I want on the tree, but some stuff I haven’t even unboxed.”

  Mo slipped on her shoes and zipped up her coat. “Don’t forget. Dawn’s party is Friday night. Lots of people there. Lots of opportunity.”

  “It’s been less than twenty-four hours, and you’re already trying to set me up.” I gave her my cheek when she leaned in for a kiss and a hug.

  “It’ll be a week. That’s plenty of time for you to get over what’s her name.”

  “Let’s hope she isn’t there,” I said.

  “For her own sake,” Mo said.

  Chapter Three

  “No. No, no, no, no, no.”

  I looked down at coffee splattered all over the front of me, then up at the face of the person who’d just ruined my favorite coat. “Are you kidding me right now?”

  Dr. Taylor Mitchell gasped and put her hand over her mouth. Then she laughed. “I’m so sorry. What are the chances? Here, let me clean this up for you.”

  “Do you ever slow down—look up from your phone or whatever else keeps you from paying attention?” I was pissed. I grabbed the napkins from her hand and brushed at the stain, but it was futile. Light-gray wool would soak up any liquid. Too bad she took her coffee black.

  “I will reimburse you for the dry cleaning. I really am sorry. I was reading an email and wasn’t paying attention.”

  I hated that she looked good. And how come she was everywhere now? She took up a lot of real estate in my mind, which I tried hard to erase, but I kept seeing that smile she had for Catmas, thinking it would be nice to be the recipient of something so pure and sweet. The smell of coffee wafted up to bring me back to reality. Shit. My favorite coat was now stained. I would have forgiven her, but the crooked smile she was trying to hide stopped me.

  “Don’t worry about it.” I walked right past her and out of Cool Beans. That place was my kryptonite. I was never going back. It was Tuesday morning and I was going to be late for work. Again. Catmas was starting to explore the house, and I needed to shut all the doors to limit her space. It’d taken me forever to find her this morning. I called and called, and right before I gave up, a ball of fluff uncurled from on top of the mantel and stretched out, knocking over a photo of me and Stephanie that I’d forgotten. Catmas looked down at the shattered glass, then back at me.

  “Stay there. Don’t jump down. I don’t want you to get hurt.” I raced over to her, my hands out ready to catch her if she leapt. Instead she sat and reached her paws out to me. Fuck, I was already in love with this cat. I gently picked her up and put her over my shoulder. Her loud purring filled my heart with happiness. I picked up the frame to see how much damage was done. Catmas looked over my shoulder and hissed. “I completely agree with you, baby girl. She was awful.” I was rewarded with a gentle head butt and a few rubs against my ear. I put her on the couch while I swept up the shards of glass. That made me half an hour late.

  Right now, I didn’t have time to go home and change, so I stomped out to my car so frazzled I even forgot my coffee. No way I was going back for it. Fuck my day already.

  “I don’t know what you like in your coffee, so I left it black. I’m really sorry, Jessica.”

  I turned to find Taylor, breathless from her quick jog to my car, holding a large coffee. I didn’t want to take it. I wanted to sulk. I didn’t know why she got under my skin. Probably bad timing. The stress of breaking up and then being responsible for a cat when I knew nothing about animals all within twenty-four hours had shot my anxiety through the roof. “Thanks.” It was more of a mumble, but I took it from her outstretched hand and crawled into my car.

  “I see you made the flyers. Still haven’t found the cute kitty’s family?”

  I had a stack of flyers in the passenger side of my car with a photo of Catmas and details about her. I hadn’t put up a single one. “Catmas. Catmas Evergreen. And no. Look, I have to go. I’m late.” I knew Catmas wouldn’t be her name, but I had this need to poke at Taylor. She annoyed me just by standing there looking cute and perfect. And she bought me a coffee. Of course, she was probably the perfect girlfriend with the perfect life, and that tiny Porsche parked near the front of Cool Beans was probably hers.

  “Send me the bill for your coat. You know where to find me,” she said.

  I was backing out of the parking spot before she was done talking. It was rude, but I had to get to the office. It was a hot mess of a morning and not even nine o’clock. I knew I already had one problem on my desk. Plus, I’d missed a call from my mother. She refused to text. I called her.

  “Good morning. What’s up?” I asked.

  “I had to hear it from Mo.”

  My heart pounded faster for no other reason than my mother was scolding me. I had no idea what she was talking about.

  “Whatever she said, it’s a lie.” It was probably the truth, but that was my automatic response. “Unless you’re talking about my breakup with Stephanie. That’s true.”

  “You broke up with Stephanie?”

  Well, that wasn’t the news Mo had shared. My mom liked Stephanie because she always brought her flowers whenever we visited. Never mind that she cheated on me for months. “Yeah. It just wasn’t working out.”

  “Jessica Lynn. When are you going to settle down? I really don’t like meeting all these nice girls and then seeing you dump them. I have to go through the breakup, too.” My mom sounded genuinely upset.

  “Mother, I caught her cheating on me. With Melissa from work.” I dropped that bomb and waited for my mother to lose it.

  “Are you serious? Melissa on your team? With the short black hair and beautiful brown eyes?”

  “She’s a wolf. Trust me. Work is almost unbearable, but I just smile and grit my teeth. I know they won’t last. Mo and I even have a bet on their longevity,” I said.

  “They’re both lucky I don’t run into them.” She growled.

  Mama Bear to the rescue, I thought. As much shit as my mother gave me for failed relationships, she really did have my back.

  “Okay, I’m almost to work. What did I forget to tell you?”

  “That you have a baby. I saw Mo this morning at the gas station, and she told me all about your gray kitten. Where did you find her?”

  I pulled into the already full lot in front of
the office and then drove around the block until I found street parking. “She found me. I saw her at the coffee shop, and then she was at my house later that night. It was so weird. Anyway, I took her to the vet Saturday to see if she was chipped. That was an experience.”

  “That was a big sigh,” she said.

  I heard her voice flip from phone to Bluetooth speaker. “Where are you headed this early in the morning?”

  “I’m dropping off fruitcake to the church. Want me to stop by and take you to lunch?”

  I felt guilty for being late to work and then turning around and leaving a few hours later, but lunch with my mom was always fun. “Yes. Can we meet at noon? I’ll tell you all about this sweetheart kitty that I haven’t fully committed to, but chances are, she might be your new granddaughter.”

  “You mean my only granddaughter?”

  “Hey, you have a son, too. Push that kind of talk on him. I’ll see you at noon.”

  * * *

  My mom knew how to make an entrance. I knew she was there before they called me, based on the happiness of the voices around me. Brandon peeked over my cubicle wall.

  “You need to adopt me. I love your mom,” he said right as she rounded the corner.

  “Mom. Quit spoiling my team. Only I deserve your chocolate chip cookies.” I took the plate of cookies from her hands and gave her a quick hug.

  “You share. I raised you better than that.”

  “Hello, Mrs. Raymond. How are you?” Melissa slithered over to my cubicle with a smile pasted on that made my skin crawl. It took every ounce of my being not to throat punch her.

  “Margaret, right?” my mom asked.

  I coughed. My mom was fucking with her.

  “Um, no. Melissa. It’s good to see you again.”

  My mom completely ignored her and turned to me instead. “Are you ready? We can take my car since it’s warm.”

  I slipped on my coat and followed her out. “That was pretty cool back there, Mom.”

  She squeezed my arm. “If she wasn’t a coworker, I’d have said something. I just hate that she hurt you.”

  I thought about it and decided my ego was broken, but not my heart. I wasn’t as emotionally invested in Stephanie as I should have been, given that we dated for six months. It still stung though, especially since I had to work with Melissa. “I know now that she wasn’t for me. It doesn’t hurt as much as you might think.”

  We ordered two bowls of broccoli-cheese soup and sat down at a small table inside Panera. I pulled up a picture on my phone and slid it over to her. “Here’s the kitty I’m fostering.”

  My mom grabbed the phone and ooohed and ahhhed over the picture of Catmas. “What’s her name?”

  “Funny story there. I took her to the vet on Saturday and didn’t know her name, so I just wrote down the first thing that came to mind.”

  “Which was?” My mom looked at me expectantly.

  “Catmas Evergreen.”

  “Honey, what the hell kind of name is that?”

  “It’s a play off a character from The Hunger Games. The heroine is Katniss Everdeen. It’s too long to explain.”

  “Are you really going to keep her? Is she healthy? When can I meet her?”

  I held up my hands at my mother’s barrage of questions. I gave her a brief history but elaborated when I reached the vet part. “Oh, so I take her to the vet, and I literally run into the doctor as she’s coming in and I’m going out. She wasn’t looking where she was going and crashed into me. Here’s the funny part. I ran into the same doctor this morning at Cool Beans. Guess how?”

  Mom held her hands up and shrugged.

  “Yep, she ran into me again because she was reading an email and not paying attention. She spilled her coffee all over me. Look.” I held up the front of my coat, which showed off a Rorschach splatter pattern. I’d spent a solid ten minutes on it with a Tide stick and club soda at my desk.

  My mom smiled at me. “You like her.”

  I gasped and leaned back in my chair. “Not at all. She’s insensitive and barely apologized.” That wasn’t true, but I wanted my mom on my side.

  “Is she attractive?”

  “Well, yeah, I guess. I mean if you like mean blonds who talk down to you.” I was irritated that my mom was messing with me. I pushed my soup aside, my appetite gone.

  “Oh, stop pouting. I’m just teasing. Let’s talk about Christmas. Have you done any shopping yet?”

  “I bought TJ’s gift and picked up a few things for the church.” We drew names this Christmas, since it was just the four of us, and decided to spend the money we would have spent on gag gifts to help the church buy gifts for the less fortunate families.

  “Do you want to give me ideas on what you might need or want?”

  My mother drew my name this year. I wasn’t the easiest person to shop for. Mom didn’t have the same tastes as I did, so she wasn’t allowed to buy me clothes or home furnishings.

  “Let me think about it.”

  “Sweetie, Christmas is coming up. I’m kind of pressed for time.” She pushed her soup bowl away from her and leaned back in the booth. “Maybe something for your kitty?”

  “Mom, I don’t know that I’m keeping her. I’m going to post those flyers after work tonight. Hopefully she can go to her rightful home.”

  “Well, I still want to meet her.”

  I rolled my eyes and huffed. “Fine. Come over tonight. I should be home by six. Then I can give you the gifts for the church.” Thank God for Amazon. I ordered everything online, and since nothing could be wrapped, I had a pile going in one of the corners of my house. I tried putting the gifts under the tree, but that just made Catmas go crazy, so I moved them into the dining room. The tree wasn’t a problem. Even the ornaments dangling there weren’t enticing enough. But something about an obstacle course of presents under the tree made Catmas turn into ninja cat. I wasn’t done decorating it or the inside of the house, but I planned to finish this weekend. Decorations really did improve my mood.

  “Want me to bring dinner?”

  My mother was forever trying to feed me. Everyone was too thin to her liking. She even thrust food on Mo, who’s built like a bouncer. Mo loves my mom. They have a nice relationship outside of me, which sometimes makes me jealous, but Mo was estranged from her own parents, so the connection with mine was immediate. My mother has a big heart, and growing up she helped a lot of my friends out with solid advice and delicious food.

  “I think after this heavy meal, I want something light. I can fix a salad if you and Dad want to swing by,” I said.

  “I can bring the baby a toy or catnip.” The giddiness in my mom’s voice was unmistakable.

  “I’m not keeping her. Oh, maybe you can help me hang up flyers in the neighborhood. Dad can stay back with Catmas, and we can staple and tape them to poles and even some of the businesses on the square.” A little ache pricked in my heart. She was a cute cat, but I really wasn’t ready for the responsibility of a pet. I couldn’t even keep a relationship alive.

  Chapter Four

  Catmas was belly up on my mom’s lap, staring at us while my mom petted her into a comatose state. Her eyes closed every so often, her purr was loud, and she softly kneaded the air from time to time.

  “We aren’t hanging flyers, are we?” I asked.

  “Oh, honey, it’s too cold. Maybe you can get your father to?”

  “The hockey game’s on.” My dad sat in the recliner glued to the Rangers’ game. He tore his eyes away from the television set long enough to remind me that I’d fed him salad and this was his reward. “Who eats salad during the holidays?”

  “You’ll thank me the next time you go to the doctor and she tells you your cholesterol’s down.” My dad waved me off and went back to watching the game. “I guess I’ll put them out tomorrow night.” I stopped pushing and finally gave up and sat beside my mom.

  “I love her silver eyes. She’s such a beautiful cat, sweetie. Maybe you’ll think about keeping her?�
��

  “You can always have her.” That idea gave me hope when Mom didn’t reject it immediately. “I mean, Pirate isn’t going to be around forever. Not that I want anything to happen to him, but you know.” Pirate was my mom’s rottweiler, a known killer of squirrels, rabbits, opossums, and even a skunk. He had slowed down over the years but was still feisty at ten.

  “That dog wouldn’t hurt a baby, but you know he doesn’t like other animals. He gets jealous when I pet them. He’s going to be so upset when he smells the kitty on me.”

  Even my mom couldn’t bring herself to say Catmas. Operation Change Name was in effect.

  “Okay, so we’ve determined Catmas is a horrible name. How about something festive like Noel, or Bell, or Carol, or even Cookie? What say you, little fur ball? Do you like the name Cookie?” On cue, Catmas sneezed and shook her head. We both laughed.

  “I’m taking that as a no,” my mom said.

  “Agreed. Or maybe it should be something obvious like Fluff, or not obvious like Becky.” I leaned over Catmas. “Hold my beer, Becky.”

  My mom playfully pushed me away. “You’re not naming this sweet thing Becky. That’s not a cat name.”

  “She seems to like Catmas,” I said. She sneezed again. “Or not.”

  “Go finish the tree. I’ll keep the baby company.”

  I sighed but obliged and dug through the last box of Grandma’s decorations. “Are these legal?” I held up a box of one thousand tinsel icicles.

  “Why wouldn’t they be legal?”

  “I don’t know. I read somewhere that they’re either flammable or not good for the environment. But they sure look pretty.” I draped a few over the high branches just to see if I liked them and stood back to admire my work.

  “I remember them so well. They’d get caught in the vacuum. It was the only time I heard Grandma curse.”

  “I won’t put too many of them up. Catmas hasn’t climbed the tree yet, and I really don’t want to add a lot of bright, shiny things to tempt her.” I told my mom about the presents under the tree and how Catmas could go from chill cat to freaked-out wildling in the span of five presents.

 

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