Now they bobbed in the water. Alone in a great expanse of blue.
“Do I need to call for help?” she asked quietly.
The muscles in his throat rippled visibly. “No.”
Even ill and hurting, he was utterly masculine. He had one tanned leg extended on the seat. The other foot braced on the floor of the boat.
She knelt beside him and rested her cheek against his arm. “Take your time. We’re not in a rush.”
When he stroked her hair, she could tell his hand was shaking.
Minutes passed. Five. Ten. Thirty. Under other circumstances, this lazy summer float would have been relaxing. As it was, Lisette’s stomach cramped in painful knots. She was so damned scared. Not for herself, but for Jonathan.
At last he struggled to sit up. A bit of color had returned to his face, and he no longer looked as if he were about to pass out.
When he had both feet on the floor, she put her hands on his knees. “Look at me, Jonathan. And don’t give me some pretty lie. How bad is your head?”
He covered her hands with his. “Bearable.”
“You swear?”
His smile didn’t quite reach his eyes. “I swear.”
She nodded. “Okay then. Tell me what to do.”
Slowly he straightened, swaying only slightly, though that could have been the motion of the boat. “I’ll be right here beside you. We’ll take it easy. This dial needs to stay between these two lines. The only tricky part will be entering the harbor. It’s going to be busy.”
“I’m fine,” she said. “I’ve always wanted to learn how to drive a yacht.”
He winced, this time theatrically. “You don’t drive a yacht.”
She waved a hand. “Whatever. Now lie back down and rest.
Though they were only a few miles offshore, at the speed where Lisette felt comfortable, it was going to take at least half an hour or more. Gradually the island began to come into focus. She wasn’t sure which was scarier—being in control of a huge watercraft in the middle of the ocean, or coming closer to land, and having to navigate an obstacle course of Jet Skis and sailboats and a dozen other yachts and speedboats of every shape and size.
Jonathan stayed upright the entire way, not standing but seated inches away from her, his mere presence giving her the confidence she needed.
Once they reached the mouth of the harbor, she cut their speed even more and clutched the steering wheel. “Here goes nothing,” she muttered.
“You’re doing great.”
A few vessels honked at her for going too slow, but for the most part, her progress was unimpeded. When they approached the area of the marina where the yacht had been berthed, her nerves increased. “I hope your friend has insurance. This is worse than parallel parking.”
“I’ll help you,” Jonathan said. “It will be fine.” He rose to his feet and muttered something.
She shot him a look, alarmed. “What’s wrong?”
The jut of his jawline was grim. “My depth perception is shot. We’ll have to get close and drift in. The guys at the dock will tie us off.”
The next fifteen minutes were a blur. Somehow, Lisette managed to get the boat close enough to the pier for Jonathan to throw a rope. His first try landed in the water. A second attempt worked.
When Jonathan reached over and cut the engine, Lisette exhaled a noisy sigh. “Never again,” she said. Instead of feeling relief, now she was free to worry about her husband.
He kissed her sweaty cheek. “You were great.” When he bent down and started gathering their personal items, she gritted her teeth. Stubborn man.
“Let me do that,” she said, trying to elbow him out of the way.
“Lisette.” The steel in his voice told her the CEO was back. “I’m fine.” The unspoken message was Back off.
But he was definitely not fine. She knew that the worst part of today’s ordeal for him had been feeling out of control. Now he was trying to take over again, though she was damned if she would let him collapse in the street.
Because he was ignoring her attempts to make him sit down, she got in his face and glared. “Here’s the schedule, big guy. We’re going to slowly stroll to our car. I’ll drive us back to the villa. Then we’ll have a peaceful, quiet dinner and make a game plan.”
“Why do we need a plan? If you’re insisting I rest, let’s spend all day by the pool tomorrow. Problem solved.”
She gaped at him, unable to tell if he was serious or merely trying to aggravate her. “The honeymoon is over, Jonathan. We’re flying home to Charleston as soon as I can get that swanky jet back down here. I may need your help with the details,” she conceded.
Jonathan picked up the large straw tote and motioned her ahead of him. “You go first. And take somebody’s hand when you climb out. The boat can move unexpectedly.”
A dozen strong feelings duked it out in her chest, not the least of which was the furious impulse to push her aggravating husband overboard and let him take his chances.
Because she didn’t want to make a scene—and because several gorgeous dock hands were waiting to secure the boat and return it to its assigned slip—Lisette picked up the small cooler and climbed out.
She wasn’t able to breathe until Jonathan was on dry land, as well. Of course, he hadn’t asked for help disembarking.
The afternoon heat was blistering. Earlier she’d had the impression they parked close to the water. Now, the distance seemed to have multiplied.
Jonathan walked beside her, not saying a word. She wanted to ask how he was feeling, but she didn’t want to get her head snapped off.
When they reached the car at last, she put a small towel down on the driver’s seat to keep from burning her legs on the hot leather. Jonathan’s movements were careful as he eased into the passenger seat. She had the impression he was trying to limit his range of motion to keep from jostling his head.
At the villa, she parked haphazardly and faced her silent passenger. “Go straight to the bedroom. Please, Jonathan. I’ll check with the maid about our dinner. Then I’ll come join you, and we can talk.”
He nodded. His pallor had increased again, despite the humid temperature. When she found him half an hour later, he was sprawled on top of the mattress, facedown, as if the strength of his will had carried him that far but no farther.
She whispered his name. When there was no answer, she leaned down to make sure he was breathing. The fear she had kept at bay earlier came rushing back. The doctor had said six months. Jonathan had been feeling pretty good lately. Surely this was a momentary setback.
Or maybe it was the beginning of the end.
She gathered fresh clothes, went into the bathroom and locked the door. Then she stood in a hot shower and cried. Jonathan had married her because he needed someone calm and capable in his corner. Somehow she had to find it in herself to ignore her own grief and be the woman he needed.
When she finally returned to the bedroom, she was blissfully clean but puffy eyed, Hopefully, Jonathan wouldn’t notice.
She found him on his back this time, staring at the ceiling.
Though it seemed impossible under the circumstances, she wanted him still. She needed the physical connection to reassure herself she wasn’t losing him yet. Today had been both terrifying and illuminating. Jonathan had been an integral part of her life for many years. Now he was her husband. Whatever happened to him was going to impact every part of her existence.
She scooted across the bed, huddled into her robe, and curled up beside him, resting her head on the edge of his pillow. Immediately he shifted and put his arm around her, still silent.
When she found the courage to speak, there was no point in playing games. “You know we have to go home...right?”
“I know.” The flat intonation in those two words could have masked anger or despair or both.
&
nbsp; “We should call your sister and brother-in-law and ask them to come over for dinner tomorrow night. Mazie’s going to realize something is up when we return home early. The explanations will be better face-to-face.”
“That’s why I married you,” he said lightly. “The voice of wisdom.”
“You don’t sound glad. That was a pretty snarky comment.”
He rolled to his feet. “How long till dinner?”
“Half an hour.”
“I’ll shower and meet you on the terrace.”
As a dismissal, it was unmistakable. She swallowed her hurt. “I’ll use the guest room to finish getting ready.”
“Suit yourself.” It was as if he couldn’t bear to look at her. “I’ll be out shortly.”
* * *
Jonathan was being an asshole. He recognized the behavior, but he couldn’t seem to do anything about it.
He wanted to hide from the world, from Lisette in particular.
His episode today had completely knocked the wind out of him. He’d thought he had time. He’d thought things would only get bad at the end. Apparently he’d been in denial all along.
How could he know what was right and what was wrong? Lisette wanted a baby. Maybe they had created a new life today. But if not, surely it was for the best. Time was running out for him. Bit by bit he was losing everything. Knowing that his future with Lisette was slipping between his fingers stabbed him with painful regret.
Though the last thing he felt like doing was eating some fancy romantic meal, he couldn’t bring himself to abandon his bride in the midst of their honeymoon. He joined her as promised. It didn’t escape his notice that Lisette downed three glasses of wine during dinner.
He wasn’t the only one who had suffered today. Lisette must have been scared out of her mind, but the woman was a damned trouper. She’d kept her cool, and she had done what had to be done.
Tonight she looked like a weary angel. Her halter-necked sundress was pale peach, a soft color that made her sun-kissed skin glow. She had put her hair up, exposing the vulnerable nape of her neck.
As crappy as the day had been, Jonathan knew how he wanted it to end. With Lizzy beneath him, welcoming him home. He loved her. Truth be told, he was only now realizing how much. Faced with the prospect of losing her, his feelings were a riotous flood of thoughts and yearnings he dared not reveal.
But would she desire him the same way tonight?
A man liked to be a man. Today hadn’t shown him at his best. Would she think less of him? The random thought didn’t even make sense. His emotions were all over the place.
He ate enough to be sociable and then nursed a glass of water while picking at his dessert. The mango sorbet and shortbread cookie were delicious, though he’d lost his appetite along with his faith in the future.
The maid came been back and forth, serving and removing dishes. Her interruptions kept the awkward lack of conversation between bride and groom at bay. But now dinner was over and the silence lengthened.
Jonathan felt the weight of everything piling up on him. His wife. His company. His sister and J.B. and the old man. How was it all going to play out? Would Hartley try to swoop in and take over? His brother’s motives were still a painful mystery.
Jonathan never should have asked for Lisette’s help. She didn’t deserve this. She needed a man who was whole. One who could give her multiple children and a home and a happily-ever-after.
His mood slipped lower. All the positive thinking in the world wasn’t going to change a damn thing.
He stood abruptly and tossed his napkin on the table. “I’m going for a walk,” he said gruffly. “Don’t wait up for me.”
“I could go with you.”
His shoulders tensed as he stopped with his back to her. Tense seconds passed. “No. I’d rather be alone right now.”
* * *
Lisette made some excuse to the maid and fled inside. To have her husband make it so embarrassingly clear he didn’t want her company was a pain that left her breathless. She was no psychologist, but she recognized why Jonathan was pushing her away.
Perhaps it was the only choice he could make to deal with the changes happening in his life. The terrifying moment out on the water today would have frightened anyone. For a man who kept an iron grip on his destiny, the incident must surely have made the earth shift beneath his feet.
She gathered everything she needed and holed up in the guest suite across the hall from the master bedroom. The hollow feeling in her chest wouldn’t go away. After changing into the soft feminine nightwear she had bought for her honeymoon, she sat on the bed, scooted up against the headboard and tried to read the novel she had brought with her.
The book was a bestseller by one of her favorite comedic writers. After she read the same page three times, she gave up.
Was she going to be reduced to playing online solitaire during her honeymoon?
She picked up her cell phone and nearly dropped it when it rang insistently. No contact was linked to the number, but it was a Charleston-area prefix, so she answered.
“Hello?”
After the briefest of pauses, a male voice on the other end spoke. “Lisette, this is Hartley Tarleton, Jonathan’s brother.”
Her gasp was loud enough for him to hear. “Why are you calling me? How did you get this number?” She had been with Tarleton Shipping long before Hartley disappeared, so she knew him, of course. But they weren’t on casual phone-call terms.
“Mazie gave it to me. Listen, Lisette. I need to know about Jonathan. He’s in trouble isn’t he? Tell me what’s going on. Mazie says he’s sick.”
“Why would you think he’s in trouble?” Her mind raced feverishly, looking for sinister motives in the conversation.
Hartley’s muttered curse was audible, even with a crackly cell connection. “He’s my twin. We’ve always had that gut ESP thing. Quit stalling. I need to know.”
“You shouldn’t be calling me,” she said, trying to sound firm when her insides were shaking. “Ask your sister.”
“I did, damn it. Mazie gave me the bare bones, but she said you’re the one who knows everything that’s going on with my brother...all the details.”
“Well, she’s wrong. Your brother isn’t big on opening up to people. Or have you forgotten that?”
“I haven’t forgotten anything.”
“I’m hanging up now,” she whispered. “Jonathan would be furious if he knew I was talking to you. Whatever you did hurt him very badly.”
There was a brief pause where she could hear Hartley breathing. Then he spoke softly. “Jonathan wasn’t the only one who got hurt, Lisette. Think about that, why don’t you. And if you have any heart at all, swear you’ll let me know when the situation gets bad. I have to be there with him. Please.”
“I can’t promise that.”
“I love him.”
The three words were filled with such aching anguish that tears stung her eyes. “I do, too,” Lisette said.
“Keep my number.”
She knew she shouldn’t. She knew it was wrong. But she felt a strong, empathetic connection to Jonathan’s banished sibling. “I will. But that’s all I can promise, Hartley. I’m sorry.” She tapped the red button and ended the call before she could change her mind.
Sixteen
The adrenaline and stress of the day left their mark on Lisette. After the odd phone call with Hartley, she fell asleep almost instantly, though she tossed restlessly and turned the sheets into a tangled mess.
Sometime after one in the morning, a noise jerked her awake.
Jonathan’s whisper soothed her fears. “It’s me, Lizzy.” He scooped her into his arms and carried her to their bedroom. “I’m sorry I was an ass. I can’t sleep without you.”
She curled against him, relief flooding her body. “Don’t shut me out.”
She wanted to tell him she loved him, but she stopped short.
“I’ll try,” he said.
His arms were strong, cradling her to his naked chest. He smelled like soap and warm male skin and everything she held dear.
“Are you okay?” she asked. He’d told her not to do that...not to hover and ask questions about his health. But her need to know was stronger than her worry about his displeasure.
After a moment’s pause, he kissed her forehead and deposited her gently on their bed. At some point he had carefully folded back the sheets before coming to the other room. Now he joined her and stretched out with a sigh. “I’m fine.”
She raised up on one elbow, stroking the hair from his forehead, only then realizing that he was completely nude. “Truly?”
“Truly.”
His expression was hard to read. A night-light burned in the adjoining bathroom, but the bedroom itself was shadowed and dim. “Did you make arrangements for the jet?” she asked. Surely that was a safe topic.
He nodded. “We’ll need to be at the airport by ten thirty tomorrow morning for preflight security and screening.”
Suddenly she knew what she had to do, what she wanted to do. “Then we have tonight,” she whispered. If their honeymoon was to be cut short, she wanted him to remember these last few hours...to remember her as his bride. When they returned to Charleston, she couldn’t bear it if he pushed her aside in his quest to be stoic. She needed him to understand they were a team.
She braced herself on one hand and bent her head to taste a flat, copper-colored nipple. With her free hand, she stroked the hard planes of his chest. His abdomen was roped with impressive muscles. “I love your body,” she murmured, feeling the texture that was so uniquely male. Warm silk over taut sinew.
Jonathan shuddered when she touched him intimately. He tried to move on top of her, but she pushed him back. “Let me do this first, Jonathan. I want to...please.”
He closed his eyes, his entire body rigid. She circled the head of his sex with her tongue, loving the sounds he made when she took more of him in her mouth. Here, in their bedroom, she breached his careful barriers. Here, in the dark of night, he let her see his wants. His needs.
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