by Neven Iliev
First, Syme reprimanded the elven Priest.
“So what if Mikey misjudged the explosive radius of a device he’d only been told about yesterday? He took a gamble setting it off remotely, and it paid off. Blasted that Imp Wizard right out of the air, he did.”
Then he turned towards the human Rogue.
“And is it really such a big problem that Holt was too busy keeping the others alive to heal you on the spot? Your life is hardly the only one in danger out here. If anything, you should be thanking him he managed to patch us up as well as he did!”
Finally, he addressed both of them at once, as well as the rest of the room.
“Do you want the Dec to come back and find us pointlessly arguing over things we can’t change? None of us are here because we particularly want to, but we’re all in this together. So, either get your shit straight, or we’re all going home in urns.”
The intervention seemed successful as neither Mikey, Holt, nor anyone else could argue with the veteran’s scathing words.
“… I’m sorry I held a grudge over that,” the Rogue spoke in a quiet voice. “You’re right, it was my own fault I got blown up, and I owe you for stitching my ass back together.”
“Don’t mention it,” the elf grumbled. “And I’m sorry for calling you a two-timing short-ear behind your back. You’ve shown you deserve better than that.”
“Thanks, Holt. That means a lot to me.”
“From now on I’ll only say it to your face.”
“Oy!”
The thirty or so troops shared a short bout of laughter at Mikey’s expense. The volatile situation seemingly disarmed, Syme sat back down on the wooden bucket he was using as a stool and continued fiddling with the Comm-crystal.
“It won’t work, Syme,” Kaleera repeated herself yet again. “It’s gonna take a lot more than a little speech to get a signal past a demonic Overlord.”
“Yeah, I get that. The big scary burning bloke’s bungling all the long-range magic, but how do we know he’s still up there?”
*Rrrumble*
A distant tremor knocked a small cloud of dust from the wooden boards overhead and caused the various tools and crates in the basement to rattle ominously. The Warlock shot the Warrior a ‘Need I say more?’ look, to which he replied by rolling his eyes in a ‘Okay, fine!’ sort of way and finally gave up on the Comm-crystal.
“How do you stop one of these demonic Overlords anyway?” Mikey asked.
“You don’t,” replied Kaleera. “You run and hide until they run out of juice and disappear.”
“Then what in the blazes is the Sandman planning to do? And why did he need the Dec’s help to do it?”
“Why you asking me?”
“Because you’re a Warlock! If anyone knows how to stop a big angry demon, it’ll be you!”
“It’s not my specialty, okay?” she snapped back. “My Skills are focused on conjuration and magical bombardment. I don’t do demons like that Sandman bloke, so give me a break.”
“… Sorry. It’s just, I can’t trust that guy at all. Caught a glimpse of him before the battle started, right? Instantly gave me the heebie-jeebies.”
“The what-now?” she asked with a raise of an eyebrow.
“Y’know, heebie-jeebies,” Mikey tried to explain himself. “Makes your skin crawl and your hair stand on end, stuff like that.”
“I think that’s the whole point of his getup,” a conscripted Ranger chimed in. “The sunshine and flowers look really doesn’t fit the whole reclusive demon master thing he has going.”
“That seems rather detrimental though, doesn’t it?” one of the soldiers argued. “Can’t really trust the guy if he looks like he eats babies for lunch.”
“Maybe, but being recognizable is important for adventurers. And mercenaries, by extension. All the top guys have their own signature look – their personal brand. Really gives their name and reputation more weight, which leads to more work. Know what I mean?”
“I get that, right, but who’d knowingly hire someone that blatantly evil?”
“The Republic government, apparently.”
*Rrrumble*
The irrelevant conversation was abruptly interrupted by yet another quake.
“So, Syme, are you sure you don’t want me to go out there and find the Dec?”
“You really should give it up, Mikey,” the Warrior declined. “The Dec’s a lot more capable than she looks, yeah? If she thought she could handle whatever’s going on out there, then all we have to do is trust her judgment.”
“Besides, what would you do even if you found her?” asked someone else in a teasing manner.
“I’d get her back down here where it’s safe and sound!”
“What if she doesn’t wanna come back?”
“Then I’d drag her along even if she’s kicking and screaming!”
“No offense, ya two-timing short-ear,” said Holt, “but something tells me you’d get your eyes clawed out if you tried that.”
“That’s only if you’re lucky,” claimed someone else. “The Dec pulled a knife on the last guy that tried to get too grabby with her back at the Fort.”
“Oh, c’mon! That’s just a rumor, right? There’s no way a sweet girl like her would do something like that.”
“Uh, huh. Need I remind you how that ‘sweet girl’ took out that Imp Priest outside the old barber shop?”
The image of Keira using a Power Shot to drill a hole through the groin of an Imperial soldier – or ‘Imp’ for short – flashed through the men’s minds. They weren’t going to complain about her eliminating the enemy healer, but her methods and the smirk on her face were both a bit… unsettling. Not to mention that, while noteworthy, it had hardly been her first nut-shot of the day, nor her last.
“Okay, yeah, I think I see your point,” admitted Mikey. “That habit of hers makes her seem a lot less cute.”
“Three guesses who she picked it up from?”
The men in the group threw Fizzy a sideways glance. The golem was currently performing basic maintenance on her equipment, but stopped when she felt their gazes and looked up at them with a confused expression.
“What?” she glanced around at them. “What?! Is there something on my face?”
“The lads are just uneasy how you always seem to go for the dick,” clarified Kaleera.
“Oh. Well, it’s hardly my fault you male meatbags have a universal, easy-to-reach weak point like that.”
“Gnn…” came a groan from the corner. “Always go… for the cock…”
“See? Hilda gets it,” Fizzy declared triumphantly before resuming her tinkering.
The dwarven Berserker’s delirious sleep-talk was hardly a reliable source of information. The last time the group heard her voice she muttered something about ‘those tricksy pink leprechauns.’ Nobody present knew who or what a ‘leprechaun’ was supposed to be, but they somehow doubted it was supposed to be pink. Still, the fact that she showed brain activity was a sign she’d probably get better, at least in terms of physical health. Whether she would be any more or less insane when she woke up was entirely up to chance.
*Rrrrrumble*
“Why are you so insistent about going after the Dec anyway?” asked someone in the group. “Are you sweet on her or something?”
“… Might be, little bit,” Mikey admitted. “I was just thinking… Wouldn’t mind running off with her somewhere. Settle down, have some fuzzy-eared kids, y’know?”
“Hah! Not if I get her first!”
“Really, Barry? Aren’t you already married with two sons?” asked the man sitting next to him.
“So? Who says I can’t have myself more than one wife?!”
“Oh, I don’t know, how about the law? Or society in general? Not to mention common sense and moral decency.”
“Come off it, Carl. Look me in the eye and tell me you haven’t thought about having those dusky thighs wrapped around your head.”
“What?! Of course, I haven�
��t! Well, not until just now, I mean.”
“Not too bad a thought, is it?”
“… Not the worst thing ever, no.”
“Gotta admit, I wouldn’t mind that either,” a third man weighed in.
“Hmm, I wonder what the Dec will think if she knew you boys were admiring her thighs so much.”
The guys’ smiles turned to grimaces so quickly that one would think the female Warlock had dumped icy water on them.
“Way to be a buzzkill, Kaleera.”
*Rrrumble*
“Guys, dusky thighs aside,” Mikey spoke up again, “aren’t those tremors getting louder?”
“Come to think of it, they kind of are,” admitted Syme.
“Not louder. Closer.”
Fizzy’s correction caused a heavy silence to grip the room. It was disturbed only by the soft clatter of the golem packing up her field repair kit and strapping her electric charge pack to her back. A few moments later, the group heard a muffled, otherworldly roar followed by yet another earth-shaking impact. It was another in a series of reminders that the giant fire-demon of murder-death was, indeed, still up there.
*Don Don Don*
A loud knock on the basement’s slanted double-doors sent the entire unit on high alert, prompting them to quickly rise to their feet and ready their weapons and magic. The only exit to the chamber opened with an audible creak, allowing some sparse daylight to fall down the steep staircase and brighten up the dungeon-like atmosphere.
“It’s Keira, stand down!” came an all too familiar voice.
The catgirl in question carefully descended the dangerously narrow steps with her arms in the air. Her unit first saw her mud-stained combat boots, then her pale leather trousers, and the mithril rapier hanging from her waist. This was followed by a quilted jacket in the gray-and-black colors of the Republic flag draped over a chainmail shirt. However, it wasn’t until they saw her tanned face, golden eyes, and fiery crimson hair that they finally felt relief wash over them. A few exclamations of ‘Dec!’ and ‘Ma’am!’ rose up from the troops as they formed a semi-circle around her.
“Alright, calm down you lot,” she ordered while doing a quick headcount. “Syme, anything happen while I was absent?”
The elf threw a sideways glance towards Holt and Mikey before answering.
“No, ma’am. Nothing at all. The VIP’s still out of it, we’re all present and accounted for, and ready to move out at your leisure, ma’am.”
“Any word from headquarters?”
“No, ma’am. Comm-crystal can’t get through to them.”
“Magical interference from the Overlord, ma’am,” added Kaleera.
“Ah, bollocks,” Keira grimaced. “Right, then. In that case gather your gear and your courage! We’re evacuating this place and seeking shelter elsewhere!”
“We’re going to ignore the Primus’s orders to stay put?”
“Situation’s changed, Holt. Those Overlords have been steadily making their way towards us for the last several minutes. A mere basement won’t be enough to save us if we get caught up in their wake. Yes, Holt, what is it?”
The Priest, having been given permission to speak, sheepishly put his hand down.
“Did you just say Overlords? As in, more than one?”
“Oh. Yeah, about that. Long story short, Mr. S returned the Empire’s favor and called out another one to distract the first. So… there’s two of them now.”
The news washed over the ignorant squad, and they had no idea what to make of it. To most of them, something like ‘demonic Overlords’ were things they had only heard about in passing, if at all. Their inability to determine whether the Sandman’s stratagem had made things better or worse was plainly visible on their faces, prompting Keira to clarify the situation.
“Bottom line is, Mr. S’s plan worked, and the two of them are too busy fighting each other to bother with the likes of us.”
Those reassuring words prompted a small round of cheers, which was cut short by yet another earth-rattling aftershock.
“But we’re not out of it yet!” shouted Keira. “They’re wrecking everything in their path, so we need to move before they get here and we get caught up in it!”
“Decanus, ma’am?”
“What is it, Mikey?”
“You said they’re headed towards us?”
“Yeah. The big white one is slowly being overpowered by the big scary one, who seems to be making his way in this general direction.”
“Okay, but why this way specifically?!”
“MORNINGWOOOOOOOOOD!” a thunderous bellow poured in from the outside.
“… I haven’t the slightest idea.”
Fizzy obviously didn’t buy the bare-faced lie. She had no idea when, why, or how Boxxy managed to piss off, of all things, a demonic Overlord and still lived to tell the tale, but she couldn’t bring it up within earshot of the others. She momentarily felt envious of those three demons’ telepathic communication with their master, and she too yearned for an extremely convenient way to talk to her Goddess’s chosen Hero. Unfortunately for Fizzy, it was a link she’d never be able to have due to her species. Golems were notoriously immune to any and all magic that affected the mind, whether detrimental or beneficial. Therefore, the most she could do at the moment was keep quiet and assume that something utterly nonsensical happened between Boxxy and that mega-demon sometime in the past.
“It doesn’t matter,” Keira declared. “Whatever the cause, this location is right in their path, so pull your pants up and get those butts moving! Now!”
“Yes, ma’am!”
As if struck by lightning, the troops immediately formed a line and followed their Decanus out of the basement with Hilda in tow. The dwarf’s adamantite armor, however, had to be left behind. It made her much heavier to the point it took three of the group’s strongest members to get her into the basement in the first place. They’ve since had time to strip her, wrap her in blankets, and fasten her to a makeshift stretcher, so going up the steps was considerably easier than the way down. A few of them couldn’t help but want to bring her gear along separately, but Keira ordered them to leave it. Even if it was powerful and expensive equipment, it was much too cumbersome to lug it around and would slow them down. It was thus left behind out of concern for their safety, not because a greedy monster-in-disguise wanted to come back for it later and add it to its collection.
Once outside and back into the street, the troops were greeted with a somewhat surreal sight. To begin with, the thick storm clouds overhead now had numerous gaps and clear patches. They couldn’t even imagine how those unnatural formations occurred, though at the very least the rain had stopped falling. Looking out over the low rooftops to the north, they could clearly see the two Overlords going at it. One was a winged, fire-wreathed demon straight out of a nightmare, while the other was a half-human half-spider thing that was almost too white to look at. A gigantic pillar of ice suddenly rose from the ground between them like a geyser, hitting the winged demon in the chin. The proxy uppercut sent shards of ice and plumes of flames flying out in every direction, knocking the blazing skull-headed demon down on his ass with a massive crash.
*Rrrrrumble*
“You can do it, uncle! Just hit her right in the pussy!”
The boisterously vulgar female voice coming from one of the nearby rooftops once again sent the troop on their guard. At least until they realized that it belonged to a certain four-armed, red-skinned demon who was technically on their side. They were formally introduced to Kora, Xera, and Drea when they set out on the mission to entrap the enemy VIP, so they already knew she was one of the Sandman’s familiars. However, the details regarding her supposed uncle, why she bothered cheering at all, or whether the Overlords actually had genitals would have to remain a mystery for the moment.
“Excuse me, miss Arms!” yelled Keira.
“Huuuuh?!”
The fiend looked down at the catgirl with a vicious sneer. Her glare alone ca
used a few of the more skittish conscripts to audibly swallow.
“We’re ready to leave, now!”
“Oh, man! And it was just getting really good, too! Fuuuuuuck!”
Kora leapt down to the ground without trying to hide her disappointment.
“Yo!” she greeted the gathered soldiers with a wave of her left hands. “Boss ordered us to babysit you lot, so you’d better be grateful!”
“What’s going on here, Dec?” asked Syme. “And what does she mean by ‘us?’”
“Mr. S was badly injured by the summoning ritual and can’t escort us personally, so he lent us two of his familiars for our protection in his stead. However, I would appreciate it if miss Snack could stop playing games and take this matter seriously.”
“Oh? But I am taking it seriously, honey,” Kaleera smirked arrogantly.
“Wait, what am I doing over there?!” asked the other Kaleera.
She was hardly the only one caught unaware, as all the soldiers unwittingly took a few steps away from the intruder in their midst.
“Huhuhuhu,” giggled the impostor in a smug tone. “You halfwits didn’t even notice when an extra person snuck into your group. You mortals are way too easy!”
“Miss Snack, stop unnerving my men,” said Keira with a tired expression. “They’re on edge enough as it is.”
“I’ll have you know I’m merely masking my presence in case an enemy finds us, that way I might be able to catch them by surprise. I’m not using this form just to screw with people, you silly kitty.”
“Uh-huh. But you’re still doing this mostly to mess with them, aren’t you?”
The succubus didn’t answer with words, but merely stuck her tongue out through her smiling lips in a teasing manner.
“Look, just- Quit it, okay?! Mr. S said you have to listen to everything I say, didn’t he?!”
The disguised demoness’s playful attitude quickly disappeared along with her mischievous smile.
“Okay, fine,” she said in a cold voice. “Have it your way.”
In the next instant, her facial features started changing while her Republic magic user’s uniform filled out in all the right spots. She transformed into a shape that looked more like a human version of her true self rather than the green-haired Witch she copied to pull off her prank. Kaleera was visibly relieved, although she also felt a certain amount of envy. Seeing her flat, almost non-existent chest swell out to a pair of massive mammaries in a matter of seconds did not help her self-esteem in the slightest. The men in the group watched that particular part of the transformation with great interest as well, albeit for completely different reasons.