by Nique Luarks
“Heeey, True...” Sawyer approached us. She leaned in for a hug, and I stiff-armed her ass.
Chance mugged her.
“Why you acting like that?” Sawyer giggled. She was drunk.
“Aye, you gon’ have to move the fuck around, shorty. You don’t see me talkin’?”
Sawyer covered her mouth. “Oh, my bad. Chance, is that you, girl?” she smiled. “I ain’t seen your ass in a minute. What you been up to?”
Chance stared at her, and I chuckled at her mean ass.
“Yo, Sawyer, I’ma get wit’ you later.”
She rolled her eyes. “Well, excuse the hell out of me, rude-ass bitch.”
I pulled her back by her shirt. “You wanna run that back?”
Sawyer’s eyes bounced back and forth between Chance and I. “I’m only playing.” She smiled at Chance. “I know how them pregnancy hormones do you. Girl, I got five of my own.”
I let her go, then shooed her away.
Chance sighed loudly. “Let me find Morgan so I can get the hell out of here.” She tried to step past me.
“Yo’ ass shouldn’t be here in the first place. You can’t run if some shit pop off, and you got this little-ass purse, so I know you ain’t got yo’ banger. You trippin’.”
I didn’t give a fuck how good she looked, Chance hanging out at a function like this wasn’t safe. I wasn’t tripping off Jaliyah. She was in the slums more often than not. I had my eyes on her occasionally, but for the most part, I wasn’t worried about her rowdy ass.
“I said I’m leaving, True, damn,” she snapped, her eyes misty.
“The fuck you bouta cry for? ’Cause I’m telling you to go? Risking our daughter’s life is more important than you being at home wit’ yo’ feet up?”
She stormed around me and switched away, throwing the plate and shit in her hands on the ground.
“Chance.” I followed after her.
She ignored me.
I trailed her closely as she pushed through the crowd. Her ass bounced in the tight-ass shorts she had on. I silently dared a nigga to touch or even speak to her. Chance was pregnant, but that didn’t take away from how cold she was. Even at seven months, she was doper than a lot of the bitches there.
Once we made it to the parking lot, I grabbed her forearm. “Fuck is wrong wit’ you, man?” I spun her around.
Her teary eyes made me feel bad. “Nothing!” she screamed in my face.
Hovering over her, I gripped her chin and made her look up at me. “What the fuck you crying for then?”
“I’m not crying.” She blinked, and the waterworks started.
The fuck?
“Chance, wassup?” I walked her away from the crowd and towards my whip. “Talk to me.”
She wiped her face as I pulled my shirt over my head. “Now you wanna talk to me?”
“Man...” I drawled, handing her my shirt. “Wipe your face and shit.”
I watched as she dabbed her eyes, then cleaned her nose.
“You the one who told me you wasn’t fuckin wit’ me. So why you trippin’?”
Balling my shirt up, Chance sighed. “I’m just tired of being pregnant.”
“Nah, I ain’t buying that.” I stared down at her.
She shrugged. “You don’t have to.”
I nodded. “A’ight.”
“Chance!” Morgan yelled as she walked towards us. “What’s the matter? What happened?”
“I’m ready to go.” She licked her lips.
Morgan draped her arm across her shoulder. “Okay, let’s go.”
They walked off, and I watched them until they got in the whip and pulled off. Taking another drink, I went back towards the crowd to check on Jaliyah, and to get Drake so we could go.
“You good?” Drake passed me the blunt.
I took it from him, nodding as I took a puff. Instead of leaving like I had planned to, we posted up in the parking lot. The hood was still jumping, and it was well after ten.
“Shorty be having yo’ mind gone every time you see her,” he laughed. “Yo’ ass in love, nigga.”
I passed the L back to him. Seeing Chance all dolled up, carrying my baby, had me feeling some type of way. Then she was crying and shit.
“Her homegirl can get the dick. She talk too damn much, but she fine as fuck.”
“Nigga, you know that’s Silas’ bitch, right?” I chuckled, hopping on the hood of my car.
Drake waved me off. “Telling me that ain’t do shit but make me wanna smash her quicker.”
This nigga.
“I got her number. I’ma slide through and see what her thick ass about.”
Shaking my head, my eyes roamed the crowd. Drake loved drama. Even though Erica had moved out of state to go to school, he was still knocking that down, and regardless of him acting like a single man, he cared a lot about her feelings. He was creeping way too close to home.
My phone pinged.
Nisha: I just dropped Carter off with Granny
I shook my head. It was a blessing and a curse to have Granny Ann. She was too nice to my baby mamas. They could drop my seeds off, disappear, and not call her once. She needed to learn how to say no.
Nisha: You at the BBQ cause I’m omw down there
She wasn’t staying with me anymore, and I hadn’t been fucking her, so I already knew what type of time she was on.
“True!” Sawyer twisted towards me.
I licked my lips. “’Sup?”
“Damn...” She ran her hand down my chest. “You bouta go?”
“Why?”
“’Cause I was gon’ see if you wanted to come in the house and chill for a second.”
I chuckled, taking the blunt from Drake. “Yo, shorty, you hot. Ain’t your BD here? You trying to get that nigga smoked?”
Drake laughed. “I ain’t had no action all weekend. It’s whatever.”
Sawyer rolled her eyes. “His drunk ass is playing dominoes. He ain’t worried about me.” She stepped closer. “What, you scared?”
“Bitch, you sound retarded.” Drake took a swig out the fifth of Henny he’d been babysitting.
Sawyer snapped her head in his direction. “I don’t think I was talking to you.”
He shrugged, chugging from the bottle again.
She faced me again. “So, you down or not?”
“Not.” I pushed her back. Bitches were always trying to get a nigga hemmed up. “Take yo’ ass to your baby daddy. I ain’t got shit for you over here.”
“Wow, it’s like that?”
“Yep.” I passed the smoke back to Drake.
He pointed across the parking lot. “Is that your boy?”
My eyes shot away from Sawyer and landed on Ali. He was one of those jobless, broke niggas who lifted weights all day. I had never had any problems with blood, but he looked like he was coming with one. Sawyer stepped back, cleared her throat, then smiled. Drake shook his head.
“I’m glad you guys could make it.” Sawyer put on a fake-ass voice.
“Sawyer!” Ali flexed. “The fuck you over here smiling in that nigga’s face for?”
“I’m not smiling in his face, I’m just kicking shit with an old friend, baby, damn,” she whined, making her way towards him.
Drake laughed.
“What’s funny?” Ali lifted his shirt to show his piece.
Drake sipped coolly from the bottle. “Nigga, if you draw that li’l piece of shit, you better use it.”
“Now, come on, y’all.” The panic in Sawyer’s voice was evident. “It’s kids out here. Our babies are out here playing and shit.”
“You better listen to your shorty.” I hopped off the hood.
Ali nodded. “I’ma see you niggas around.”
“Don’t make no promises you can’t keep, bitch,” Drake shot back.
Ali paused.
“Baby, come on. Fuck them.”
Wasn’t you just trying to fuck me, though?
I laughed. “Hoe, you a joke.”
&nb
sp; “Yeah... I’ma definitely see you niggas around.” Ali snatched Sawyer by her arm and dragged her away.
Drake pushed off the whip. “Punk-ass nigga. This shit dead.” He stalked to the passenger side. “Let’s go get on some bitches.”
I watched Ali disappear into the crowd, knowing I’d just made an unnecessary enemy.
All over a hoe.
Shaking my head, I made my way to the driver’s side.
“And, nigga, put a shirt on,” Drake laughed. “Fuck you supposed to be?”
I laughed, hopping into the whip and slamming the door. “Fuck you, nigga.”
Pulling out of the parking lot, my mind flipped back to Chance.
17
You made a fool of me
Chance
Haze: We need to talk
I stopped folding laundry as I stared at the text. Nine days. That was how long I’d been trying to reach Haze. After the cry at my parents’ house, and the incident at the BBQ, I took a day to myself to meditate and journal my feelings. It seemed like whenever I was trying to advance in life, I was met with some kind of resistance.
And that was nothing but the devil.
Which was why I had agreed to go to Church with Granny Ann on Sunday. She and Ms. Sadee attended the same church, so I knew I’d see Erin and her babies. I was losing my faith in a lot of situations and people, but in reality, I only had myself to blame. On my day of self-reflection, I cried my last tear over things I could not control.
I had to forgive Rel, Haze, and True. I should’ve been more honest with Rel from the jump. He was charming, but I always knew he wasn’t my type. Then I was constantly leading Haze on, making him think our relationship was going somewhere when we both knew it wasn’t. And because I had invested so much of my life into True, it was easy to go back and forth and be indecisive on whether I should leave him alone.
So, no, I didn’t want to talk to Haze. I wished the best for Rel, and True could no longer be a centering thought.
My phone started ringing as I grabbed a drying towel to fold. Smelling the fabric, I sighed in satisfaction. Grabbing my phone, I saw it was Morgan calling and dropped down on my bed. I answered the phone, satisfied with my new choice of detergent.
“Hello.”
“What are you doing?” she asked, chomping down loudly on something crunchy.
“Folding clothes before I go for a walk. You?” I yawned.
Maybe I’ll take that walk tomorrow.
“Okay, so I got something to tell you,” she stated excitedly. “And you can’t judge me.”
I nodded. “Of course. This is a no judgment zone.”
She paused for a moment. “I fucked Drake.”
Great...
“Morg. You know him and Silas hang in the same circle.” Shaking my head, I stood up to finish putting my laundry up.
She smacked her lips. “Girl, he don’t hang with Silas. I don’t even think Drake likes his ass,” Morgan chuckled, but she hadn’t said anything worth laughing about.
If Silas found out, he’d feel disrespected. Yeah, Silas and Eli weren’t as close to Drake as True and Roman were, but they all worked for the same person: Tone. And Tone didn’t tolerate or associate himself with chaos. He’d put an end to it before it even started. Morgan being in the middle of a mess like that made me feel queasy.
“Chance, you still there?”
I sighed. “Yes, I’m still here. When did this start?”
“The day we went to Sawyer’s BBQ. He called me, and we met up at the Marriott,” she chuckled. “I was nervous as hell because he’s so damn rude, but that nigga fucked me silly.”
“Morg.”
“Quit worrying. Silas ain’t gon’ find out if Drake don’t want Erica’s little ass to find out.”
Frowning, I pulled the phone away from my ear, put it on speaker, and tossed it on the bed. Erica is Erin’s little sister, and E didn’t play any games when it came to her. I wished Morgan would’ve just kept this to herself because I was starting to feel conflicted. Morgan is my best friend, but Erin is someone I respect, and because of her loyal nature, it was only right I felt the need to reciprocate it.
I guess this is how Morgan felt about Drew and True.
“You’d blackmail him?” I asked in disbelief.
“Yep. He told me about her when I asked what they had going on.”
“What did he say?” I inquired.
“That they ain’t together, but she is his main priority when it comes to women. Shit, I couldn’t do nothing but respect his honesty.”
This is not going to end well.
Huffing, I ran my hand across my stomach.
“And he’s coming over tonight since Saint is at Lenora’s.”
“Morg, I know it’s your life, and you’re entitled to do whatever you feel, but I don’t think you sneaking around with Drake is a good idea.”
“Wasn’t you the same one saying we needed to respect each other’s decisions?”
Touché.
I folded more towels.
Morgan continued. “Drake is cool. We both understand what we’re doing is nothing but sex.”
I sighed. “Okay, just be careful and cautious, please. Drake is not the type of dude you want to throw in the mix of whatever complicated situation you and Silas have going.”
Again, she laughed. “Girl, I told you I’m still screwing him, too, didn’t I? Payback is a muthafucka.”
Morg...
I tossed my head back and closed my eyes. She was playing with fire, and the last thing I wanted was for her to get burned. But at the rate she was going, things were bound to go up in flames. I silently thanked God when my other line beeped. My brother, Gino’s, name flashed across the screen.
“Morgan, let me call you back.”
“Okay, don’t forget! I want you to come to the shop sometime this week, too. I wanna try this new hair.”
“I won’t, and okay,” I told her before clicking over. “Hello.”
“What you doin’?”
“Nothing.”
“Hol’ up,” he said, and I rolled my eyes. When he clicked back onto the line, he cleared his throat. “Yo.”
“I’m here.”
“Tyriq? Jamal?” When he said our other brothers’ names, I picked my phone up.
“We here.”
“Wassup, Chance?”
“What’s good, sis?” they greeted me at the same time.
“Hey.” I sat down. “What’s going on?” My brothers never called me with more than one of them on the phone.
Of course, Gino spoke first. “Wassup wit’ that nigga True?”
Huh?
“Tyriq, tell her what you told me.”
Ty didn’t speak at first, but then... “This li’l chick I be fuckin’ wit’ said he was manhandling you, and made you cry at a BBQ in the hood.”
I rubbed my stomach.
“So that nigga be putting his hands on you?” That was Jamal.
“No.”
“So ole girl was lying?” Gino pressed.
“True didn’t manhandle me. He grabbed my arm when I was trying to walk away, but he didn’t do it roughly, he was just trying to get my attention.”
“And you was crying?” Jamal asked.
“I’ve been emotional, and not because of True. I’ve been dealing with a lot with this pregnancy.” I didn’t appreciate being interrogated, but if it kept True out of unnecessary drama, then so be it.
“Why the fuck you always trying to protect that punk-ass nigga?” Gino spat. “He don’t really give a fuck about you.”
I frowned, finding that hard to believe. Yes, True and I didn’t always see eye to eye. And yes, we were in a rocky place, but I knew without a shadow of a doubt, he loved me, and none of my brothers could make me think, feel, or believe otherwise.
“I’m coming to Missouri to stay for a couple months, and if I even think that nigga is mistreating you , I’ma fuck him up. You got brothers already there that ain’t looking
out for you!” Gino yelled.
“She don’t fuck with us,” Tyriq spoke up. “She be cliqued up with them blood niggas from the Mob.”
“Stupid.” Jamal smacked his lips. “What you gon’ do if you get caught up in some shit?”
I closed my eyes.
Why is this my life?
“You need to leave them niggas alone. All money ain’t good money, sis,” Jamal said.
“I have my own money.”
“Yeah, okay. That’s True’s money. Probably the reason you let that nigga dog you so much.”
Why did everyone keep saying that? Was I blind to what was really going on around me?
“Then, Pops told me he got you and another chick knocked up at the same time,” Gino continued. “That nigga friend zoned yo’ silly ass, then put a baby in you? You know what that means?”
“All she is is a BM,” Tyriq answered for him.
My vision blurred, but I refused to shed a tear.
“And you better than that, baby sis.”
Jamal tried to clean it up. “We love you, so we lookin’ out.”
I stared at the floor.
“I’ll be there to regulate some shit.” Gino wouldn’t let up. “Y’all niggas need to be on her ass until I touch down.”
Hanging up the phone, I took a deep breath. When I felt myself hyperventilating, I had to remind myself Carlee didn’t need the stress. When the tears tried coming again, I closed my eyes and counted to six. Once I calmed myself down, I stood back up to finish what I’d been doing before Haze texted me, Morgan threw me in her mess, and my brothers tried to check me. Grabbing a washcloth, I decided I was taking back control of my emotions.
True
“Here, Daddy, watch my baby.” Chasity dropped her baby doll in my lap. “Make sure you change her diaper.”
I nodded, flipping through channels.
“And I’ma watch Carter for you, okay?” she said sweetly, going to Carter’s swing, prepared to pick him up.
“Leave him alone.” His little ass had just fallen asleep. “And I already told you, if you wanna hold him, Daddy gotta help you, remember?”
Chasity pouted. “You get on my nerves.”
“Good. I’m supposed to.”