by T. S. Joyce
“She’s not in there. She died.”
“Kiera—”
“No, it’s okay, Beast. I accepted it a long time ago. I had a flare up recently when Kane got his dragon back. I thought I could get my animal back, too, but our story isn’t the same. Our cleansing procedures weren’t the same. I don’t feel my animal at all. If I didn’t hear and see better-than-average, and if I didn’t have these eyes”—she gestured to the frozen lion eyes in her face—“I would think I dreamed her. I don’t even remember what it feels like to share my body with the animal anymore.” She shrugged and tried to smile. “Maybe that’s a good thing because now I just want to move on.”
“By roaming?”
“Maybe.” It was a bullshit answer. She was shutting him down because she always got defensive when she felt someone digging too deep. She didn’t like the way Beast leaned back in the chair, and his eyes closed down on her, too. That was her fault. “Sorry. I’m not used to answering this many questions in such a short amount of time.”
Beast nodded slowly, a faraway look in his eyes as he stared at a miniature salt and pepper shaker in the middle of the table. “Kiera?”
“Hmm?”
“You have all your shit here, thanks to Dustin. You have no reason to go back to the motel tonight. Why don’t you stay here, just for the night, and actually open up to the possibility that you don’t have to run forever?”
“Who says I’m running?”
“Me. That restlessness you’re feeling? That’s what happens to rogues who don’t settle in a pride. You need to stop somewhere, just to see if you even can. Your momma was a rogue, but that don’t mean you have to be one, too.”
“I’m not a rogue, Beast. I’m a human.”
“Bullshit,” he said, making his way to the door. “You say you don’t feel your lioness, but she’s there. Somewhere. I can smell her, Kiera.” His lip twitched slightly, and his voice lowered to a husky, gravelly tone. “I can feel her. She was calling to my animal before you even knew I was stalking you. I feel like a rutting alpha again being around you. No human can pull that kind of a response from a lion. Just because you can’t call on her for a Change doesn’t mean she’s dead.” Beast pulled open the door and made his way outside, and right before the door swung closed, he said, “Apex failed.”
Kiera hissed. She didn’t know what possessed her to do that. She hadn’t done that since she was a kid, but Beast was wrong, and he was pissing her off. He was giving her hope in words, but he had no right to. He didn’t know. He didn’t feel the bleak emptiness inside of her. He didn’t feel the bottomless hole that once upon a time she’d tried to fill with things like drinking and partying and hell, even sleeping around. She was just getting ahold of this, just accepting it. Kiera just needed to accept being human so she could be happy with her life someday.
And here Beast was telling her he smelled her lioness. That he felt her, like she wasn’t some ghost long-dead.
Well, fuck him.
Eyes burning, she blasted off the bed and stomped outside.
Beast had his back to her as he walked purposefully toward his trailer. He had to have heard her coming, but he didn’t duck out of the way when she shoved him in the back.
“You have no right.”
Beast snarled and rounded on her.
“You have no right to give me hope, no right to say she’s still here. You aren’t me! You don’t feel what I do!”
“And what is that, Kiera?”
“Nothing! I feel nothing! I’m empty.”
Beast pulled her against him so fast, she didn’t know what to do with all of these roiling emotions inside of her. She felt so much. Safe, angry, warm, overwhelmed. With a long sob, she sagged against him, and then before he could trap her completely in the hug, she pushed off him and made a bee-line for her car on the other side of the park.
“Where are you going?” Beast asked from right behind her.
“Home.”
“And where’s that, Kiera?” he barked.
“Anywhere but here! You think it would be good for me to stay in this trailer park where I’ll have to watch you all shift into your precious animals while my heart gets ripped out every time? Hell no. This place would torture me. And you spouting off about my lioness like you know her—”
“I do know her.”
“I don’t even know her anymore! You can’t know her better than me, you dick weevil douche nugget armpit shitstain… fuck! I don’t even know what I’m saying right now I’m so angry. Stop following me.”
Beast was grinning, and she wanted to claw his face off, but she didn’t have fucking claws anymore, so she bent down and ripped two handfuls of wild grass from the ground and threw it at his face. It floated down in a pitiful green rain that missed him by a foot. Fuck everything. She kicked at a weed and let off a pathetic human growl when Beast got too close. If that noise didn’t prove she was human, well then Beast was just as crazy as the other psychopaths in this trailer park.
“Damn, Beast,” Dustin crowed from his front porch. “Kiera looks pissed! You want me to protect you from her?”
“Fuck you, Stupid Dustin!” Kiera said, flipping him the bird.
Beast’s grin grew bigger.
“I said stop following me!” she barked at Beast. Her body was humming with something, fury perhaps. She hadn’t been this mad in…ever.
Beast was taunting her, and Dustin was butting in now, too. “Sorry, no fucking me, Kiera. Emma’s got that chore tonight. By the way, Stupid Dustin is a terrible insult. My IQ is kind of high. I made all As in school. And I’m a fast talker, so you know I’m smart. Do you want to try again? You could call me Douche Canoe Dustin. Dung Beetle Dustin. Dick Flake Dustin?”
Feeling insane with her anger, she flapped her hands around in front of her and stomped the next two steps. “Aaaah!”
Dustin zipped his lips and pretended to throw away the key, but he was still smiling. Stupid Dustin.
Beast felt heavy—too heavy—from behind her. That, and he was growling now, a low threatening sound that raised the hairs on the back of her neck. She swatted at it. He wouldn’t hurt her, probably, but just in case, she picked up her pace.
“Bad idea running from a predator,” Dustin called unhelpfully.
“I fucking know! I used to be one!” She pulled on the door handle of her El Camino, but Beast slammed the door closed again and yanked her around to face him. And his face. Was. Terrifying.
Blazing gold had taken his eyes, and when he curled his lips back, his teeth had grown sharper. Body rigid, his muscles pressed against his clothes. He was in hunter mode.
Beast cupped her neck and dipped his fiery gaze to her lips. It struck her in the seconds before he leaned into her. He wasn’t hunting her. She’d riled him up. Beast pressed her against the car with his body weight and kissed her hard. So hard she tasted blood. So hard she felt his teeth. So hard she could feel every stony muscle of his torso against hers like a second skin.
Trapped! He’d trapped her against the car, was holding the back of her neck, and she was stuck in this rough kiss with a man she was so…so…
Beast released her neck and stroked his hands down her arms to her hands where he intertwined their fingers. The growl in his throat was nothing short of feral and rattled constantly, but his kiss had gone from bitey to sexy in an instant. He angled his face, pushed his tongue past her lips and into her mouth, and oh my God. She was supposed to be doing something right now… Raging? Running? He’d kissed her into dumbness. Every remaining working brain cell was focused on how soft his lips had suddenly turned, and the little hussies were cheering like this was the best thing that could’ve ever happened to her. Her traitor body rolled against him. Her traitor hands slipped under the hem of his sweater to touch his bottom two abs.
“Let me show her to you,” he murmured against her lips.
What? Show what to who? His words didn’t make sense, but he could’ve said “Let’s go run naked in the snow
right now,” and she would’ve done it as long as he kept kissing her like this. Like he was breathing life into her.
When he ran her hands up his washboard stomach, a shiver trembled up his body. He gritted his teeth and rested his forehead on hers for a moment before he kissed her again. Right, he didn’t like touch, but at the moment, she couldn’t help herself. Beast was perfect. Dominant, manly, muscular, and could kiss like he would be a demon in the sack. And it’s not like he was pulling dominant male lion shit and turning her around to fuck her from behind. He was still holding her hands and kissing her like he meant it.
Something deep inside of her was opening up. It wasn’t uncomfortable, just there, at the edge of her senses. Her insides were slowly sparking with warmth and a tingling sensation. Whatever he was doing to her body, she loved it.
She moved her hands to his chest and moaned when his kisses drifted to her neck. He was a biter, but not too hard. Not too painful. It was as if he was letting her know he could sink his teeth into her but was in control of himself. He pulled the loose neck of her sweater aside and kissed down her collar bone to her claiming mark. When his lips brushed the first scar, he reared back and glared at it for a moment, but if he was angry, he put that emotion into kissing her again. Beast pulled her wrists down his stomach until her hands rested just at his belt-line.
Carefully, Beast slipped his hand down the front of her leggings and cupped her sex gently, dragging a sigh of ecstasy from Kiera. When he pushed a finger inside her, his body started shaking. No, it was humming with power.
He sucked hard on her bottom lip and murmured, “Woods or bed?”
“Bed,” she said on a breath.
He yanked her up, and she wrapped her legs around him as he strode for his trailer. He carried her as if she weighed nothing, but perhaps to a big, powerful man like Beast, she didn’t. His gait stayed smooth and long while he held her up with only one arm. His other hand was tangled in the back of her hair, pulling her close as he kissed her. For a moment, she thought he might need to see where he was going, but when she tried to pull away, he wouldn’t have it. Perhaps Beast knew his territory like the back of his hand.
His body jerked as he shoved a gate open. Then they were on a porch and going through a door, and she closed her eyes to everything because she was sure he would turn on the lights, and it would be too bright.
He didn’t, though. Beast stepped into his bedroom. It was completely dark except for the blue moonlight that streamed through the blinds of the window, striping her like a tiger.
Beast set her down, but stayed on her, pressing her back against a wall. He only put inches between them when he eased back to pull his shirt over his head. God, he was beautiful. Scarred all to hell, muscles rippling, tattoos covering half his body, short hair mussed from taking off his shirt, eyes glowing like an animal’s in the dim lighting. He didn’t give her time to study his perfectly defined chest, his sculpted eight pack, the ink that decorated his body, or the spider web of claw marks. He was back on her like he couldn’t stop touching her, his lips urgent against hers.
He was going to figure this out really quick. Kiera wasn’t showing a lot. She’d been in shape before getting pregnant, and her tight abs had kept her bump from popping yet, but she definitely looked like she’d eaten a big meal. Big enough to make her stomach tight as a drum and slightly rounded. But when Beast pulled her sweater over her head, his focus wasn’t on her stomach. It was on her red lacy bra. Her boobs were tender and spilling out of it, and a wave of insecurity washed through her.
Beast’s slow, feral smile put her at ease immediately. He lifted his gaze back to hers and unsnapped the back like he’d done it a thousand times. Perhaps he had. He ripped her bra from her and tossed it to the ground behind him. She had already kicked out of her boots, but Beast shocked her to stillness when he slid down to his knees and dragged her leggings down with him. He cast her a wicked big-cat smile that was all male bravado and utter confidence. Sexy Beast. He slid one arm behind her lower back and lifted up on his knees enough to bite her hip, kiss it, bite her hipbone, kiss it. He was working his way to her inner thighs, and Kiera was already panting in desperation, her nails on his scalp, gripping his hair, as she rolled her hips with every nip. When his lips brushed her sex, she gasped his name and rolled her eyes closed. This was everything. The care he took to make her feel good. The time he took. The slow pace he set with his tongue. Her entire body was shaking, and the pressure built and built until her legs wouldn’t hold her. But Beast was there, supporting her, holding her upright. With a growl, he lifted her and settled her onto his bed. Pushing her legs open wider, he sucked on her clit, then pushed his tongue into her again, but she was already so close.
“I’m coming,” she murmured mindlessly. “Beast, Beast, Beast, I’m coming.”
Orgasm pulsed through her so hard her body twitched. Kiera gripped his hair, and he snarled a sexy sound as he eased back and crawled up her body. His massive arms flexed as he locked them on either side of her shoulders. Kiera was floating. She was smoke. All she could do was look up at him helplessly as her release pulsed on and on, leaving her in a haze of pleasure she couldn’t escape. There was the tinkle of a belt, the rip of a zipper, and Kiera smiled drunkenly because it wasn’t over. He wasn’t finished with her, and a big part of her was just so happy that this moment could drag on.
Beast lifted her hand to his lips, then kissed her wrist. He kissed down to the inside of her elbow, then dragged her hand up his stomach like she’d done earlier, like he wanted that kind of touch now. Like he craved it. He was so warm, so perfect. She traced a few of the scars, but her attention drifted to his abs and to the shadows that his V of muscle made right at the top of the pants he was pushing down.
She’d never been this excited to see a man’s body before.
Beast’s pants hit the floor, and Kiera inhaled sharply when his thick erection jutted between them. Big, badass, alpha male Beast had known what he was doing. He’d needed to open her up, and loosen her up before he pushed inside her.
Beast went down to his elbows and pulled her hand to his ribs, then urged her palm to his back. When he dipped into her shallowly, Kiera moaned and clawed up her hand on reflex. Beast gave a look that was half sexy grimace, half wicked grin.
“Do that when I make you come again, Kiera. Let me know you like it.”
Holy fuck, what? He wanted her to claw him? Ooooh. Beast thrust into her deeper, his abs flexing against her belly, and now his lips were on hers again. She could taste herself on him, but there was something erotic about sharing that. She moved her other hand to his back to feel his graceful movement when he slid into her again. Deeper this time, and she had to remind herself to relax so she could take him.
He was doing something to her, something she didn’t understand. He was drawing that sensation up again, that tingling feeling that took over her body and made her feel like she was sparkling from the inside out. His fingers dug into her hip as he pushed into her again and again, all the way inside of her now, and there was so much pleasure building where he touched her she was overwhelmed by it. Her body felt so strange, so full. The hollowness was gone, and in its place was this warm hopefulness.
Beast was bucking into her faster now, and she was close, crying out every time he hit her clit, desperately gripping his hair, then clawing her fingers against the strong planes of his back, gripping his hair, then clawing.
Beast ground out her name in a voice that couldn’t pass for human, but it called to her soul. So deep, so perfect, so good. She yelled out his name and arched her back against the mattress as release rippled through her again. Out of her mind with pleasure, she dragged her nails down his back. Beast snarled a sexy, terrifying sound and rammed into her, froze, then shot warmth into her. When he reared back and slammed into her again, there was more warmth. Nothing had ever been like this. No single moment in her life was comparable.
Beast, big, dominant male, wasn’t breeding her as h
e’d no doubt been trained to do.
He was making love to her instead.
Another wave of orgasm blasted through her, and something inside of her ripped apart. A strange noise rattled up her throat, and Beast, with no warning at all, sank his teeth into her shoulder, right over Justin’s mark.
It hurt. Oh, it hurt! The shock of it left her breathless, but the pleasure overrode the pain because they were still connected at the hips. Her release still throbbed on with Beast’s, creating such an odd, beautiful, all-consuming sensation.
When he let go of her torn skin, a wave of dizziness blasted through Kiera. Her insides were ripping apart, burning, changing, and she closed her eyes against the agony.
This time, she clawed him good because she couldn’t help herself, couldn’t control her body.
A snarl she didn’t recognize ripped through her and then…
Nothing.
With a gasp, Kiera opened her eyes. Beast was up on locked arms, looking down at her with an odd expression, as if he was waiting for something.
“What did you do?” she whispered in horror as warmth streamed from her shoulder.
Beast shook his head, looking utterly confused. “I thought it would work. I could feel her. She was calling me, calling for a bite, begging me to release her.” Beast’s face went slack when he dragged his golden gaze down her chest to her stomach. His chest heaved and even she, with her duller senses, could feel his panic.
Beast bolted off her and then paced at the foot of the bed, eyes on the swell of her stomach. He ran his hands over and over his short hair. “Kiera?”
She curled up on herself, feeling completely vulnerable under his gaze. “I wanted to tell you.”
“No, no, no,” he murmured, shaking his head. “How far along?”
“Beast,” she whispered, reaching for him.
He jerked backward and slammed his back against the wall. “How far?”
Kiera’s throat was tight with emotion as she choked out, “Four months.”
Beast gripped the back of his head. His face had turned red in the dim moonlight. He looked gutted. He slammed his head back against the wall. “Human. Kiera tell me it’ll be human.”