by Piper Lawson
Okay, our terms.
No feelings for me.
Exclusive for him.
All weekend, we text.
We still haven’t found a moment since that hot kiss by my car outside the studio, because I’ve thrown myself into work after talking with Aliya and agreeing to sit on her panel.
Monday in class, I wear the tightest jeans I own, a thin sweater that hugs every curve, and black heeled boots.
When I join a group of students getting his signature on some documents for the team, he slips a sheet of paper on top of the signed form.
You’re trying to make me hard.
I flip it over and write back.
Glad it’s working.
I return to my seat and my phone vibrates.
Repentant Asshole: Meet me in the supply room of the design lab.
Liv: My ass still hurts from the last time.
Repentant Asshole: Bet you’re still wet from it, too.
He’s on me the second I arrive, dragging me against his very hard, very aroused body.
“You wore this for my benefit?”
“You like it?”
“Love it.” His eyes darken with desire as he closes the door and turns me to face it.
My cheek hits the side but my gaze skims down the aisles. “I’ve been thinking about this project. What if this robot isn’t only inspired by nature? What if its purpose is to help nature?”
He stares back at me.
“There are robots used in diving for all kinds of purposes like off-shore drilling, or patrolling ships to look for contraband. But I was doing some research about environmental remediation—”
“You want to save the fish,” he finishes.
“Yeah, Sawyer. I want to save the fish.”
“What are you looking for?”
“A big glass box. Something we can fill with water. If the robot is going to function in an aquatic environment, it has to float.”
“You’re crazy.”
I roll my eyes. “It’s not doable?”
“You didn’t design with those specs in mind. You’ll need to change metals, and have some kind of—”
“Ballast system to control how it goes up and down,” I finish. “The judges want something that’s important. Saving the oceans is important.”
He shakes his head and starts down the aisle.
He’s almost down the other end of the row.
Seriously? My idea is so terrible I’m not even getting laid anymore?
He leans into the shelving, finding a sheet of glass.
He’s helping.
My chest expands.
He slides the sheet out and lays it against the shelves.
“Thank you,” I say and mean it.
The next second he’s got me backed against the shelves. The expression on his face is lust, but more than that. “You’re welcome.”
He takes a breath. “Did you enjoy it when I spanked you?”
The hard right should be a relief, but it’s not. “Yes. And no.”
“Because you were afraid.”
“Because I wondered whether you did it with her, too.”
He turns away. “I barely knew her, and she’s practically a kid.”
“And I’m not.”
“No. You’re not.” He closes the distance between us and my heart stops. “You’re a woman. A challenge. An escape from a life I thought was destined to be filled with predictable, judgmental people.”
The cold metal shelving presses against my shoulders but all I feel is the warmth of his gaze.
I look down and see him slide his fingers down my jeans, inch by inch. “What kind of lesson is this?”
“A reminder. When two things collide, both are changed by it.”
I don’t have time to ask him what he means because a finger rubs across my clit.
The ribbons of pleasure make me gasp, my nipples pulling tight beneath my bra.
“Fuck. You this ready for me all the time, sweetheart?” His voice is a drug.
He doesn’t stop there but presses inside me. Pleasure spikes through me and I squirm, to get closer or farther away, I’m not sure.
Before I can decide, a second finger joins the first, stretching me.
The heel of his hand holds me there, grinding against my clit, but it’s his eyes that pin me in place.
I grab the shelf behind me and brace myself as his fingers rub my clit in fast circles.
“Yes. Harder.” My voice is thick with sex, because I’m already so turned on. I reach with trembling hands to unfasten my jeans and shove them down my legs, giving him better access.
He groans his approval, sliding a third finger inside me, and I don’t know how I stand.
“This better than the last time you were in lab?” he teases.
“My fingers are still scratched from building circuits and my ass was sore for two days.”
The bulge behind his fly twitches.
“Did that seriously turn you on?” I manage.
“We’ve established I’m a twisted man, Cherry.”
He might call this a lesson, but it’s not. Nor is it a punishment like the last time we were in here.
This is a reunion. A reminder of what we create together.
“I’m going to come,” I gasp.
“Not yet.” He easily pulls my hips out, hitching my leg around his waist. “Want to feel you when you do. It’s been too long.”
He unzips his pants and takes out his cock. I forgot how big he was, how thick and hard.
I fish in my bag for the box of condoms from the CVS. I take one out and start to rip open the package, but he takes it before I can.
His lips brush my fingertips, the skin that’s still sore from all the work in the lab.
“I got it.”
It’s a fucked-up kind of sweet when Sawyer rolls the condom on and positions himself between my thighs.
But all sweetness evaporates the moment he grabs my hip and thrusts inside me.
He’s so wide it’s hard to take, but he doesn’t stop until he’s all the way in.
“So tight.” His voice is hot praise. Whatever we’re doing, I can’t help feeling like I’m getting an A.
A big one.
He starts stroking into me, finding an angle that’s better than anything I’ve found myself.
All I can think about is the building pressure to come, and his driving forces me to the edge.
His hand grabs my shoulder and the other takes my hip. He pulls me back onto him. His free hand slides down my belly, touching my clit.
“I’m going to watch you come,” he says, his voice so deep it shakes me. “If you’re good, I’ll make you come again.”
I’m having a hard time even standing with all the pressure and it’s not helping that his cock is hitting me in just the right spot.
He increases the pressure and speed on my clit and I shudder. Heat spreads across my skin.
“Cherry, I was wrong. You’re fucking perfect.”
I hear the distinct rhythm in his voice that says he’s close to coming, and I work myself to the same tempo.
I’m going to come. I’m going to come. I’m going to come.
Then I’m breaking, pleasure detonating deep inside me and rippling outward.
His hand connects with my ass and the shock has every muscle clenching.
“Again.”
When he re-enters from behind, I’m a goner.
He drives harder.
I explode as I scream his name and fall forward against the shelf, my leg slipping as I shift.
And I kick the sheet of glass.
There’s a shattering sound behind us.
“Oh my God. I…”
But he doesn’t stop.
A shudder runs through him and he pushes hard a final time and holds me as he finishes.
“Shit!” Reality sinks in as I realize I destroyed the pane of glass we were going to use. “I’m the worst team lead ever.”
Sawyer c
huckles. “We can order more glass.”
His face is close. I want to kiss him.
“We have lots of lessons to make up, Cherry. I’m going to have you on the desk.” He deepens his voice. “I’m going to have you on the floor.” He nibbles my neck, kissing up and down the side. “I’m going to have you against the door.”
My eyes squeeze shut. I told Madison this was over. I swore I’d put the team first.
As I straighten my clothes, I realize they’re not the only issue. “What’s the dean’s problem with you?”
Sawyer adjusts his cuffs. “He lied on an important paper five years ago. It stopped him from getting tenure.”
“How is this your fault?”
“I was his research assistant who worked on the paper.”
I can’t wrap my head around it, Sawyer working with—for—the dean.
“There was an investigation. He was never formally disciplined, but the cloud of it hung over his head. He wanted to get in closer with my father. For all his flaws, he was influential, with an impeccable academic record.”
“Until this.”
He nods.
“He went and taught at another school before coming back. I’m not sure how he brokered this deal.”
I turn that over. There’s still a piece that doesn’t click. “Why do you care that the dean wanted to get in close with your father? Your dad was a dick to you.”
“He made sure I had good grades and opportunities.”
“Oh, so he wasn’t all evil,” I prod, and am rewarded by a dark look.
Sawyer cups my ass, pulling me against him. “Whatever redemption kick you’re on, it’s not gonna happen.”
“Because you think your relationship with your dad isn’t worth saving?”
“You’d give anyone a second chance.”
My arms loop around his neck. “And aren’t you glad I did?”
I tug at my lip, but Sawyer captures my finger and presses it to his own. I brush softly over the bow of his lip, and suddenly he sucks my finger between his teeth.
This is so good.
He’s so good.
I can’t believe we’re doing this again. My body is still shaking from what just happened, and already, I’m greedily plotting ways to have more.
“There are things we can’t do in the supply room,” he murmurs after releasing me. “We could go to a hotel.”
“Or your place.”
“There’s not much to see. The porch is still off. I’m going to finish it in the next few days so the realtor can get working on it again.”
I start down the aisle away from him. “Send me a picture.”
“Of my realtor?”
“No!” Thinking of the woman draped over Sawyer at Fall Ball has dark jealousy rising up. “Of the porch. Preferably of you working on the porch. Shirt optional.”
“Or I could send you a picture of my cock when I’m thinking of you late at night.” His grin is delicious, and my throat dries.
“That works too.”
“Tell you what. Next Thursday night, I’ll find us a place. You’re mine all night long. You need to catch up on my lessons.”
“It’s midterms, Professor. Girl’s got to study.”
“I’ll drill you.”
I cock my head. “On my flashcards?”
“Anywhere you want, Cherry.”
13
Olivia
The rest of the week and part of the next one are focused on classes and hooking up with Sawyer in between.
That doesn’t stop us from arguing in class, or by text, or on the phone.
We hooked up in his office, in a closet in the university center after lunch, and even after dark behind the library Tuesday night.
It’s reckless and addictive, and always over too soon because the threat of being caught is never far away.
A couple of times I scan R.U. Down with my friends, though I’m only halfheartedly interested in other people’s gossip.
I have my own again.
Wanting Sawyer is the easy part. I’m a grown woman and he’s sexy and amazing and makes me feel things I thought weren’t real.
He’s also been warmer and more attentive with the team lately, and more generous with his time. The input he’s given has come more like suggestions than commands.
I presented the idea of the diving robot to the team. Strangely, Madison was the first to get on board. She can convince Royce—he looks at her like she makes the sun rise over Campus Hill every morning.
Adam might take some work.
But when I explained underwater robots are helping in more lucrative applications too, like shipping and oil drilling, that seemed to placate him for now.
We have momentum for the first time. I’m starting to believe we can put forward an amazing project. Maybe even a winning one. The email that came through yesterday from the dean was the final act of what I put in motion last week.
Dear Olivia,
We received the check. Please thank your father.
The Dean
I pledged that money because I wanted to keep the Stars competition going. If it accomplishes that, it’ll be worth it.
When I received the money from Lancaster’s lawyer, the woman informed me he had intended to leave me a few other items but couldn’t find a record of them. My curiosity was piqued but I told her it was fine.
Maybe Sawyer has a record of them, but I don’t want to raise it right now. Not when things are good with us.
Tonight, on the way home from the studio after dance class, I call my mom.
“Hello?” Her voice comes through on the hands-free from my car a few blocks from campus.
“Hi, it’s me. I wanted to check on some mail from school. Has my tuition bill for next semester arrived?”
“No, but your father’s business assets are frozen.”
My hands tighten on the steering wheel and I try to focus on the road. “What does that mean?”
“There’s a full investigation into all of his spending, and we can’t pay for anything new.”
The streets pass in a blur as I navigate the final few corners and turn into the lot for my residence building.
I throw the car in park and stare out the windshield, my mind spinning. “He screwed up, didn’t he?”
“We don’t know that.”
“Then someone else did. Why would they be investigating?”
“If they contact you, don’t admit to anything,” she hisses.
“Why would they contact me?” I struggle to keep up. “Wait. You said no new expenses, but there’s still money for tuition next semester, right?”
“What about your family? Typical you’d think about yourself.”
She clicks off and I stare out the windshield. What if the worst happens and we’re left with nothing?
You had fifty thousand dollars, and you gave it away.
I head up to my room, legs heavy and face numb. Then I drop onto my bed, balling up a pillow and screaming into it.
Normally, I’d keep my frustrations about family to myself. But lately, I’ve turned to Sawyer.
He’s been oddly respectful of our agreement to keep things physical. Enough that I have to remind myself once or twice that this time will be different. This time, I refuse to lose my heart.
Going to him is not the same as feelings. It’s just…openness. He listens in a way that’s strangely nonjudgmental.
I reach for my phone.
Liv: You around?
I chew my lip until dots appear.
Repentant Asshole: I finished the porch.
There’s a picture of it, and it looks great. More than that, it’s the first he’s mentioned something other than our relationship or the fish since we got back to our arrangement.
Liv: Way to go, handyman. You were going to show me your tools.
Repentant Asshole: I had no idea you were so insatiable ;)
The next picture is of him, his zipper half undone and I can see the outline of h
is cock through the fabric.
Repentant Asshole: Going to shower. Talk soon.
He’s the whole package—smart, gorgeous, competent. I want what’s under his skin, not just what’s under his clothes.
I know we can’t, but that only makes me want it more.
SAWYER
“Dayum. It’s finished,” Daniel calls when he comes to my house early in the morning for our run. “You did a good job, too. You work hard enough, you could be a contractor someday. Maybe even an engineer.”
I shove him and he dances out of reach with a grin.
“I’m more than an engineer. I’m a fucking cofounder of a company.”
“Because you’re in such a hurry to get out of here.” He looks around. “This place isn’t so bad, Sawyer. Must be something you like here.”
I think of Liv. “Only one thing.”
Since I ambushed her at the dance studio with an apology, we’ve negotiated a new deal. We’re exclusive…which means her under me and only me.
Every time, it blows my mind. She blows my mind.
We’re back to regular texting—flirting, teasing, and talking about her new Stars project ideas.
I want more.
Olivia can’t stop me from caring about her, but we agreed to keep the feelings in check.
More like she decided to keep her feelings in check.
I’ve never gotten so attached to a woman before, never much cared what we called it. But where it used to feel wrong to be with her, now, it feels wrong to get into bed alone.
“You’ll learn to appreciate simple life after you have kids.” Daniel’s words bring me back. “Dropped Andy at daycare, he’s singing my ear off. He’s into music.”
“Sounds like one of many reasons not to have them.”
We hit the pavement, the thud of our footfalls and the slow burning in my lungs familiar. “My dad had a collection of knickknacks, including a couple of drums. You wanna take a look? Maybe Andy wants some.”
“The ‘my ears are already bleeding’ part of me says no. But the ‘good dad’ part of me says yes.”