Change My Mind

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by Ali Parker


  “Are you okay?” the bartender asked me.

  I nodded. “Yes, fine. Sorry.”

  “It’s fine. Do you want a drink or something? You don’t look too good.”

  “No thank you. I’m fine.”

  I rushed out of the lounge and into the sea of people milling about. Children were running from one display to another, ogling the many little trinkets and baubles. That was what I wanted them to do. I wanted them to be overwhelmed by the spirit of Christmas. I wanted them excited and talking a million miles a minute as they begged their parents for this or that.

  The general feeling seemed to be one of happiness, but according to what I overheard Chase tell Nick, the guests weren’t happy. They were pissed and miserable and they all wanted to bail out. I did field a few complaints, but I supposed the angriest guests would get escalated to the owner himself. I was mostly putting out the little fires that came up surrounding displays and marketing.

  The Santa idea had been awful. Poor execution were his words. That was a direct insult to me. I wasn’t sure he would say it to my face or just fire me the first chance he got. I wasn’t looking forward to either outcome. The words would forever haunt me. They would come back to bite me in the ass, I suspected. My next job interview would hinge on my poor execution skills.

  “Harper,” Parker called. “Over here please!”

  I inwardly groaned, knowing it was something to do with one of the Santas doing something offensive. “What is it?”

  She held up a piece of paper. “I was just handed this.”

  I took it and quickly read the note scribbled out. I closed my eyes and counted to three. “Puke? Who brings their sick kids on vacation? Why did they have to puke on a damn Christmas tree? They couldn’t have aimed for a trashcan or something?”

  She shrugged. “I don’t know. The woman who handed it to me said she felt bad that someone had left it in the playroom.”

  “Gee, you think? I wouldn’t be surprised if it was her kid that did it, assuming it was a kid at all.” I tossed the note in the trash. “I’ll get maintenance on it. We’ll need to get a new tree. Better yet, don’t put a tree in there. It was a bad idea in the first place.”

  “Okay, good plan. I need to check on Cori. She was a little frazzled when I saw her earlier. People are buying her stuff though.”

  “Good. Every penny we can make is going to be needed.”

  “Have you seen Chase? Nick was asking for him earlier.”

  “He found him. Chase went for a walk to clear his head.”

  Parker looked stunned. “This is his big opening. He can’t just go for a walk.”

  I looked at her and then reached for her shoulders. “Look around you. This is not the opening he wanted. I’m sorry, but I think you need to prepare yourself to be fired. It isn’t your fault but mine.”

  She swatted away my hands. “You’re being silly. I’m going to help Cori.”

  “All right, I’ll catch up with you later. We do need to talk.”

  She didn’t answer me. I moved from one room to the other, adjusting displays and trying to get a read on the vibe of the guests. After a wild few hours of check-ins, things began to slow. People were tucked away in their rooms and I could finally take a breath. I had caught glimpses of Chase throughout the night, but I avoided making eye contact. I didn’t want him to see me. I was afraid he would cause a scene when he fired me in front of the entire hotel.

  I went out to my office to collect a few things and walked in on Parker and Jake in yet another steamy embrace. I quietly backed out of the room before they noticed me. It was becoming a habit for the two of them.

  I took the long way around to go through the side door and up the stairs to my suite. Parker had done a great job. Everything she was supposed to do, she did, and she did it well. She deserved to stay on. She could take over my role in the hotel. Chase definitely didn’t need us both. Since she was so cozy with Jake, I was hoping the guy would put a good word in for her. He would surely have some sway with Chase.

  Parker was more than capable of coming up with marketing ideas on her own. She didn’t need me. I unlocked the door and went into my room. I pulled out my laptop and sat on the bed to begin writing my resignation letter.

  I took my time, explaining how sorry I was for the chaos my ideas had caused. I let him know it was not my intention to ruin what he built. I had a feeling he was going to assume this was some kind of revenge for the past. It couldn’t be any further from that. I cared about him too much. I could never look at him again. I would see the disappointment in his eyes and that would kill me. I loved when he looked at me with pride and a hint of possessiveness. He would not be proud of me after this debacle.

  I reread the letter several times, making adjustments here and there. I didn’t want to pour my heart out, but I needed him to understand I really did care about him and his success. Once I was happy with the letter, I printed it out and signed it.

  I stuffed it into an envelope and stared at it for several long seconds. I would give him the letter tomorrow morning. It wasn’t like he needed me for anything else. The marketing portion had been done. The only thing I could do at this point was make more of a mess of things. I wasn’t interested in doing that.

  I pulled my suitcase from the closet and began to pack my things. As I packed, I thought about the moment Cori offered me the job. My biggest fear had been working too close to Chase. I never once thought I would fail him. I was too cocky. I assumed I was good at my job and didn’t stop to think things through. I let a wild idea get away from me. I thought I was helping out some guys that needed jobs. It turned out they weren’t all that deserving of a helping hand. They not only mistreated the guests, but they mistreated me.

  I thought about the orientation and the suits and how much I pressured Chase into doing things my way. I led him astray. I led him down a path of no return. I couldn’t even begin to imagine the money he was going to lose. It would be more than I made in a lifetime.

  I hoped he could recover. He could scrap the whole Santa thing and a good marketing person would rebrand the hotel over the spring and summer and be ready for a relaunch in November. That was what I would do if I was his marketing manager.

  I wanted to get out of the hotel as fast as I could. I could go home tonight. I walked to the window and peered outside. Maybe not tonight. It was snowing again and the last thing I wanted to do was get caught in a snowstorm. I would get everything packed and then leave first thing in the morning.

  I moved around the room, tossing stuff into the suitcase. I looked under the bed before checking the drawers one last time.

  I zipped my suitcase and left it by the door. I needed to talk to Parker but that would be a little difficult with Jake’s tongue down her throat. I picked up the letter and wrote Chase’s name on it before leaving the room. I slowly moved down the hall, saying my own quiet goodbye to the place I’d been calling home the last couple of weeks.

  I smiled at the memory of the first time I walked down the hallway. I’d been surprised to find he was going to be right next door. That had been convenient. I went downstairs, giving the lounge a wide berth. I suspected Chase was in there sharing a drink with Nick.

  I made my way out to the office and stopped at his office first. He never locked his door, which was dangerous, but he claimed no one was going to steal anything. I put the letter on his desk, taking a minute to look around. I could smell his aftershave in the air. I hated that I was going to miss him.

  I hesitantly opened my office door once again. I didn’t see them, but that didn’t mean they weren’t rolling on the floor behind a desk somewhere. I turned on a light.

  “Parker?” I called.

  No one answered. I hoped that meant they went to Jake’s room. I needed my beauty sleep tonight and the last thing I wanted to do was listen to two people make love. It would be a reminder of what I couldn’t have. I grabbed an empty box from the corner and tossed a few of my things in it. I grabbe
d my phone charger and my personal stuff before walking out of the office for the last time.

  I was really going to miss the place. I knew I shouldn’t have been attached. I knew from the very beginning it was a temporary job. I was there to prove to Chase I was good at what I did while making some extra money to hold me over until I got a real job. Now, the chances of me getting a good job were pretty slim. I had a feeling people in the industry were going to be talking about the Santa concierge thing for a long time to come. It would be all about what not to do.

  “You’re welcome,” I muttered aloud as I stepped into the elevator to go back to my room.

  Once back in the safety of my suite with no sign of Parker, I retreated to my room. I took a hot shower before climbing into bed with nothing but my regret and sadness to hold on to. The guilt I felt for ruining his big day clung to me like a sticky syrup. It was going to take a long time to wash away that funk.

  Leaving Chase was the best thing I could do for him and myself. We had enough bad blood between us. I didn’t want to make it worse than it already was. When it came down to it, I cared too damn much. That was why I had to go.

  I didn’t dare try and stick around to fix the mess I created. I was sure I would only make it worse. I wasn’t a coward, and I wasn’t a runner, but today, I was. I didn’t have the courage to look him in the eyes and tell him I was sorry.

  I couldn’t see him looking at me with the disgust I heard in his voice in the lounge.

  Chapter 26

  Harper

  I slunk back to the office early in the morning, hoping to avoid running into anyone. My idea to flee the scene of my own crime—AKA the Santa Disaster, as I was calling it—had more than one wrench thrown in it.

  First, I didn’t have a car. That dashed my plans of sneaking away in the middle of the night. Second, there was a snowstorm, which meant most drivers were waiting until the plows did their thing.

  Lastly, I was still reluctant to leave Chase.

  I owed him an apology to his face. If I was rich, I would offer to pay the cost of the Santas and the damage they were causing. They were ruining his grand opening and it had all been my idea.

  I had expected the Santa concierge to be cute and refreshing. It wasn’t.

  Maybe with better training or a more selective hiring process, it could have worked. Unfortunately, I tried to do too much with no time. I bit off more than I could chew. More was not more. More was the equivalent of a bomb. Just thinking about the conversation I’d overheard between Chase and his friend made my heart squeeze.

  I had gone and done it. I had fallen for my ex. It was stupid and destined to lead to heartache for me all over again. I still had a fissure from the first time he broke my heart. I knew sleeping with him was a mistake. I blamed the moment. It had been a mood. He was too handsome and I was still striving for that closure I really never got.

  That closure cost more than I was prepared to pay. I hoped he would forgive me one day. I hoped the letter I left on his desk properly expressed how sorry I was. I didn’t want him to think I purposely destroyed his grand opening. I was not a spiteful person.

  I opened the door to my office, thankful to see no one was up and about quite yet. I quickly walked to the desk and opened the drawer. The thumb drive was mine. It contained all of my ideas as well as pictures of my work. I would need it to prove to my next job I was worthy of hiring. I was hoping no one ever found out I had anything to do with the resort.

  I slipped it into my pocket and took another look around. Parker, my assistant, would make good use of the space. She would get promoted and have her own assistant one day. I was happy one good thing came from this.

  My back was to the door when I felt a draft. I spun around, praying it wasn’t Chase.

  It was Parker. “There you are,” she exclaimed.

  “What’s wrong?”

  She looked around the office. “What are you doing in here so early?”

  I cleared my throat. “I was, uh, grabbing something.”

  I was a coward. I couldn’t tell her to her face I was running away. She wouldn’t understand. She would try and convince me to stay.

  “We have a situation,” she said.

  I rolled my eyes. “I know. The Santa concierge service is imploding.”

  “Yes, but not like last night. I don’t know what happened, but now they’ve flipped the switch and are all competing with each other. They all want to be the best Santa concierge.”

  I shook my head. “What? What are you talking about?”

  She sighed, running a hand over her wild hair. “One Santa scheduled his guests to have a family massage session at ten. Another Santa wanted his family to have that time slot. They got into a screaming match. Then, there was an argument about which guest got the best bottle of champagne. I overheard the bartender trying to explain there was a full case and plenty to go around, but they were still fighting over it.”

  I groaned, hanging my head and wondering what I did to deserve such bad behavior. “Why?”

  “I just told you. They saw the evaluation forms and they are all scrambling to be the best now that you guys offered a bonus to the top performing Santas.”

  “What? I didn’t do that. Who did that?”

  She shrugged. “I don’t know. What do we do?”

  I wanted to tell her it wasn’t my problem. I quit. I was officially throwing in the towel. Unfortunately, there was something inside me that refused to let me walk away from a problem I created. It wasn’t fair to her, Chase, or the rest of the staff. It was my bed and it was time I got down and dirty in it.

  “Get all of the Santas together in the ballroom. I don’t care what they are doing. Tell them to have their asses in there. If they refuse, you can fire them.”

  Her eyes widened. “I can?”

  “Yes.”

  I didn’t know if she could or not but it sounded good.

  “Oh, someone is in trouble,” she sang.

  “I’ll be there in an hour.”

  “Okay, I’ll make sure no one brings their phones. I have a feeling this isn’t something we want recorded. No evidence. It will be their word against yours.”

  I didn’t say anything. She rushed out of the office and I was left alone to decide what I was going to do. I wasn’t sure what I was going to do. I didn’t think there was any way to fix the problem but maybe I could at least get the guys to agree to be civil. If I could manage to convince them to work out their contracts without causing any problems or pissing off more guests, I would call it a win.

  I wasn’t expecting to have a total turnaround but maybe a small bit of positivity would go a long way. If he could get a couple of positive reviews mingled in with what I expected would be predominantly bad reviews, it would help. I walked out of the office, noticing the door to the storeroom was open. I reached for the handle to close it when one of the suits hanging on a rack caught my eye.

  I would make sure Jake got them sent back. Chase was going to need every penny he could get. A refund was in order.

  I started to close the door and stopped. I flipped on the light and walked inside. I unzipped the garment bag and ran my fingers over the fluffy fur-lined collar. An idea slowly blossomed. Good men always had good women behind them. Men needed women to keep them in line. At least that was what my mom always said. My dad agreed with her most of the time. At least when he was hungry or he was hoping for a peaceful night. A pissed wife never equated to a peaceful evening or a good dinner.

  I stared at the costume, sizing it up. I could make it work. A little tucking and folding and I was sure I could wear the thing. I scanned through the suits and found the smallest one. It was still going to be too big but I was confident I could figure it out. I would probably look ridiculous, but I didn’t care. I couldn’t look any more foolish than I did after last night.

  I took the suit off the rack and began to look around the storeroom. I needed accessories. I snatched a few things before hauling it all back to
my suite, being careful to stay out of the main lobby. I appreciated the stairs being near my room. It was a hell of a workout but it gave me the secrecy I was looking for.

  I walked into the room, passing the packed suitcase waiting by the door. This wouldn’t take long. I would give a speech, knock some heads together, and then be on my way. I unzipped the bag and stared at the costume. This was going to be a challenge but I was up for it. I would do whatever it took to try and salvage this weekend.

  I stripped down to my bra and underwear and quickly decided I needed something on underneath the suit. I wasn’t an expert at this sort of thing. I pulled on a plain T-shirt and a pair of shorts before stepping into the pants that felt like I was swimming in them. I pulled the drawstring tight around my waist, giving the pants a baggy appearance. I was losing hope I could pull it off.

  I pulled on the jacket, finding it just as bulky, but once I had the wide leather belt on, things started to come together a little more. I pulled my auburn hair into a bun and pulled on the wig. The wig was not exactly feminine. I knew just how to fix it. I went into the living room of the suite and grabbed the red velvet ribbon we used to wrap fake presents for the trees. I put a bow in my hair and then added the hat. With a little lipstick and my black heels, the manly costume took on a more feminine look.

  I stood back, looking at myself in the mirror, and although I felt ridiculous, it was a look. I had a slightly grumpy look with a fierceness. I needed to whip those Santas into shape and hoped the outfit combined with my generally cranky mood would be enough.

  Those men didn’t know what was about to hit them. This Mrs. Claus wasn’t messing around. If only I had an actual whip. That would certainly set some of them on the edge of their seats.

  I strode through the hall, my chin high as I walked to the elevator. I got a few looks from guests. I smiled in return. I didn’t want to terrify them but I also didn’t want anyone thinking I was part of the concierge service. I didn’t want to talk to anyone.

 

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