It takes me a few minutes to regain my composure, when I do, I take soft steps to Parker’s door and knock. When he glances up from his desk, a smile appears.
“Hey. You know you can come in whenever you want, you don’t need to knock.”
“Ok...”
His smile slips, concern fills his features causing my chest to tighten once again. My stomach rolls with nausea and I squeeze my eyes shut. The last thing in the world I want to do is ruin everything that’s happened between us. Life was pretty perfect before Dr. Garfield called.
“What’s wrong, Logan? You’re worrying me.”
He slides his chair back to stand but I hold up a hand to stop him. If he comes over here and touches me, I'm going to crumble. I need to stay strong; I need to control my emotions or I'm going to be a mess until Monday.
“I need off on Monday...”
“That’s no problem. Is everything ok?”
I shake my head, not meeting his gaze.
“I’m going to need off for one to two months.”
His dark brows pinch together, his mouth opening and closing several times.
“Logan...” My name falling off his lips, tearing down the walls I'm trying to keep up.
The first tear slips free, falling down my cheek. Parker’s on his feet in seconds, rushing around his desk and tugging me into his arms.
“What’s going on? Talk to me.”
“Did my healthcare kick in already?”
“Yes... You’re scaring me, what’s wrong?”
“My cancer’s back,” I say barely above a whisper.
Parker tightens his arms around me, pulling me as close as he can. One hand is wrapped around my waist, the other holds my head against his chest, he slowly strokes my hair, kissing my head every few seconds.
The love and care he’s showing me makes me crumble. A sob breaks free, all the sorrow I’m holding inside releases into Parker’s chest.
21
Parker
CANCER? LOGAN HAS CANCER? The ache in my chest spreads each and every time I think about it. Wait... she said her cancer’s back, meaning she had it before. Shit. That must be why she had to quit her last job. Pieces of her past fall into place, that’s why she’s in debt, why she can't afford anything.
Movement in the hall catches my eye, Owen and Lucas are walking towards my office, confusion on their faces. I shake my head; they can't come barging in here right now.
Owen motions to Logan and makes a motion asking if she’s crying. I nod my head, he motions asking if she’s ok, I shake my head. I can't believe Logan’s sick. Owen motions one more time, telling me they're leaving and to call him.
Those two are the best support system I could ask for; I know they’ll both be here for Logan too. They think of her as one of us, just like I do.
I walk over to the couch, bringing Logan with me. When I sit, I place my back against the arm rest, pulling Logan onto my lap, us both laying, taking up the entire piece of furniture. I’ve never been more thankful I let Owen pick out my couch. This is the most comfortable thing I’ve ever sat on.
“What’s happening on Monday?” I ask softly. I hate being kept in the dark but if she doesn’t want me to know, I’ll respect that too.
“I-I have to have surgery.”
“You don’t need to answer any of my questions if you don’t want to... what type of surgery?”
“A mastectomy.”
Shit. Breast cancer. I can only imagine how she’s feeling right now. My mom had breast cancer, she survived but had to have both of her breast removed. She had a hard time for years. She felt like she wasn’t a woman any longer, she didn’t feel feminine at all. My heart breaks for Logan, I don’t want her to feel the way my mom did.
“I'm sorry. What can I do to help?”
“Don’t fire me?” She lets out a humorless chuckle.
I pull back and stare down at the woman I've fallen for. Is she serious right now? I’d never fire her, especially for medical reasons.
“I’m never firing you. You focus on recovering, your job will be here for you, darling.”
“Thank you, Parker.” She traces lazy circles on my chest. I hold her closer, never wanting to let her go.
“What type of cancer did you have before?”
“Breast... same side. I had a lumpectomy. I went through chemotherapy but I guess it came back...”
“Can I... Can I be at the hospital on Monday?”
She pulls back, brows pinched together, staring at me.
“You want to be there? Why?”
“I care about you, Logan. I want to be there to support you. I know Owen and Lucas will be there too... if you let us.”
“Really?”
Tears fill her eyes, silently streaming down her face. She’s vulnerable, raw and I love it. I want this side of Logan, I want her sassy and confident side, I want her cocky and challenging side. I want all of her each and every day.
“Yes. You’re ours, darling. We take care of what’s ours.”
“I'm yours.” She sighs into my chest, snuggling even closer.
I enjoy the feel of Logan in my arms, my mind running through all the information she’s dumped in my lap today. Logan’s stronger than I ever thought possible.
Soft snores draw my attention to the beautiful woman gripping my shirt like her life depends on it.
I refuse to wake her up, learning your cancer returned has to knock the energy out of your system. I glance at my watch, it’s eleven, the boys will be here in forty-five minutes if not less to go to lunch. I slide down a little lower on the couch until my head can lean on the arm rest and get comfortable. I yank the blanket off the back and spread it over my sleeping beauty. We cuddle a little closer and I close my eyes, this is perfection.
A FINGER POKES MY CHEEK again, harder this time. I swat it away and let out a groan. When I try to stretch, I realize there’s a weight on my chest. I peek down at Logan and reality crashes back into me. Logan’s sick.
She’s still sound asleep, I glance to my side knowing what I’ll find. Owen and Lucas are sitting in my chairs, their gazes focused on me.
“So now we get a nap time?” Owen smirks.
“Shhh, I don’t want her waking up.”
“What’s going on, Parker?” Lucas asks softly, his paternal tendency taking over.
“I... I can't tell you... Not unless she says it’s ok.”
“What the fuck! Is she ok?” Owen whisper yells.
“No. She’s going to be gone for a month or two starting on Monday.”
“What the hell happened?”
“I'm awake, you can stop whisper yelling at Parker,” Logan mumbles against my chest. She tries to push off me to sit up, but I tug her back against me.
“Rest, Logan. We don’t have anything that needs to be done today.”
“Don’t do that, Parker. Don’t you dare pity me!”
“Anyone wanna clue us the fuck in?” Owen grumbles, but we ignore him, stuck in our own battle of wills.
“I don’t pity you.” I softly brush a hair away from her face, tucking it behind her ear.
“Then don’t treat me any different now that you know.” Her eyes beg me to understand.
“I don’t pity you but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to take care of you.”
“I'm not yours to take care of.”
“Like hell you aren’t,” Owen, Lucas and I all growl at the same time.
“What’s going on, Little L? I can't help if I don’t know,” Owen whispers, concern etched in his features.
“I have... I have cancer again,” She whispers, staring down at her hands.
“Shit,” Lucas mumbles under his breath.
“Cancer?” Owen whispers, his expression filling with pain. He stands and paces the length of the room, running his hands through his hair. “Ok, we can handle this. You can have surgery, right? Get chemo and radiation, you’re a fighter, the strongest woman I know.”
Logan pushes off of
me, stands in front of Owen, forcing him to stop his pacing. She wraps her arms around his waist, holding him tightly as his world crashes around him. Owen doesn’t handle things like this well. He’s a control freak at his core and when he can't control the things going on around him, he’ll do everything in his power to fix it.
“Big Man, calm down. There’s nothing you can do to make this better.” Logan tries to soothe him.
“Yes, I can! There’s always something. We can find you a better doctor or surgeon! We can find new treatments or something! Shit, I don’t know, Logan! We’ll figure it out though.” Tears fill his eyes, his carefully constructed walls falling down as he lets the first person other than Lucas and I in.
“I'm having surgery on Monday. It’s going to be ok, I survived one round of cancer, I can do it again.”
“You can't leave me, Little L,” He whispers, completely raw and broken.
“I'm not. I'm right here, Owen, right here.” She holds his face in her hands, forcing him to meet her gaze.
Owen holds on to her like if he lets go, she’s going to disappear right in front of us. He doesn’t know how to handle this. Fuck, neither do I.
“Where’s your cancer?” Lucas asks.
“My left breast. I'm having a mastectomy.”
“Shit! These gorgeous things are what’s killing you?” Owen whines, staring down at Logan’s breasts.
“Get your fucking eyes off her tits!” I growl.
Owen throws me a smirk over his shoulder but doesn’t spare her breast another glance.
“What time?” Lucas pulls out his phone, probably putting it in his schedule.
“I don’t know yet, I’ll find out on Friday.”
“What happens afterwards?”
“I’ll probably start chemotherapy and possibly radiation. I won't know anything until after my surgery though.”
“I'm sorry, darling.” Lucas stands and envelopes Logan in his arms. He doesn’t hold on to her as hard or as long as Owen. He’s logical and calculated but full of caring and empathy. Owen is unpredictable, a loose cannon with a massive heart for anyone willing to put up with his shit.
“I wanna be there,” Owen speaks up, when we all turn to stare at him, he clarifies. “I want to be at the hospital during your surgery.”
“I already told her you would.” I give him a small smile.
“Me too. I’ll clear our schedules for next week. You now have yourself three servants for the week,” Lucas adds.
“You guys would do all of that for me?” Logan’s voice is barely a whisper, tears filling her eyes once again.
“I told you, you’re mine, darling. We take care of what’s ours.”
“But you barely know me!” She cries.
“We know everything we need to know. You’ve had our backs from the beginning and now we have yours. Anything you need will be taken care of; you don’t need to worry about a thing.”
22
Logan
“WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE food? Restaurants? Desserts?” Owen taps the pen on his notepad impatiently.
“Oh my gosh, Owen! Chill out! You don’t need to know every detail of my life. I’m having surgery, I’ve done it before. Last time I only had Carrie; I don’t need help.”
“I don’t give a fuck what you think you need! I’m not leaving your side!” Rage simmers in his eyes, he’s got the biggest heart I’ve ever seen.
“Big man, you need to work. Someone’s gotta run this big company.” I stretch my arms wide, motioning to the office.
“Parker can do it.”
“Like hell I can! If any of us gets to be with Logan, it’s gonna be me!” Parker growls.
“Fine! Lucas can do it!” Owen throws his arms in the air in frustration.
“Don’t tell me what to do, fucker. I want to be there for Logan too.” Lucas barely glances up from the papers on the desk.
Owen and Lucas have been spending a lot of time in Parker’s office. I think it’s so they can all keep an eye on me, but they keep denying it. I’m not stupid though. They don’t know how to handle the fact I’m sick.
“You guys can’t take off of work for the entire time I’m off.”
“Says who?” Parker grumbles. “We’re the damn bosses, I’d love to see someone try to stop us.”
“Parker! I’m serious!”
“So am I, sweetheart. I told you, you’re ours and we take care of what’s ours.”
“I can take care of myself; I don’t need you all missing work to take care of me.”
“No way in hell are you taking care of yourself! You can’t push us away, Little L, I won’t allow it.”
“Fine! You can take off next week but no more!”
“You’re not the boss of me,” Owen grumbles under his breath, making the rest of us laugh.
THE WEEK HAS FLOWN by quickly. The guys check in on me constantly, asking if there’s anything they can do for me or how I'm feeling. They ask me a billion questions a day, coming up with lists of my favorite things and foods. Friday afternoon comes faster than I’d like. I'm on my way home from work when I get the call from the hospital with my surgery time.
I blow out a deep breath and step through my apartment door. Carrie’s sitting on my couch, a bottle of wine on the coffee table with two glasses.
“I thought we could have a night in.” She smiles at me.
Her blonde hair is twisted into a messy bun on the top of her head. Her blue eyes sparkle beneath long eyelashes. Carrie’s gorgeous, but she doesn’t recognize her own beauty. She thinks she’s plain, ordinary, she’s not though. If she ever realizes how gorgeous she is, she’ll have the boys lining up to date her.
“Ahh, yoga pants night, my kinda night!” I change out of my pencil skirt and blouse, throwing on a pair of stretchy pants and an off the shoulder sweatshirt. This is every girls clothing of choice.
“Whatcha want for dinner?” Carrie bounces on my couch.
“Eh, whatever you want. The guys have made me choose lunch every day this week. I'm getting tired of choosing.”
“Alright, let’s check yelp and see if we can find something new.”
I flip on the tv, looking for something on one of the half dozen streaming accounts Carrie has. Before I can find something for us to watch, there’s a knock on the door. I groan, making my way to the door. When I swing it open, I don’t expect to find three men staring back at me.
“Hey, Little L. Miss us?” Owen’s leaning an arm on the door frame, smirk in place.
“Didn’t I just leave you?” I laugh.
“I needed to see you again, these fuckers insisted they come along.” Parker reaches for my hand, stroking the back with his thumb.
“How’d you know where I live?”
“We own the fucking company! You think we can't go through your HR file?” Owen quirks a brow.
“Who’s here?” Carrie call from the living room.
“Is that Carrie?” Owen smirks, trying to peek around the door.
“Yes,” I groan. “Come in, you might as well meet before Monday.”
Owen swaggers into my apartment with Lucas on his heels, whispering how Owen better be on his best behavior. He really is the dad of the group.
Parker steps up behind me, enclosing me in his arms, his face nuzzles my neck, making all the stress evaporate out of me.
“I missed you.” He breaths against my skin, making me shiver.
“I saw you an hour ago.” Giggling I turn around in his embrace so I'm facing him. I snake my hands around his neck, staring up at him.
These men have quickly become the most important people in my life, along with Carrie. But Parker? Parker’s the most important one of all.
“If I could keep you by my side at all times, I would.”
He leans down and kisses my cheek then my neck. We have yet to kiss for real, thanks to Owen always barging in, but that’s ok. We’re taking things slow, like we have all the time in the world... but we might not. What if the cancer is t
oo advanced? What if I don’t survive this time? What if we’re running out of time?
“Hey, where’s that pretty little head of yours?”
I advert my gaze, shaking my head as tears prick my eyes. I don’t want to break down tonight, I want to have one last night with my friends before my world crumbles.
“Logan... What can I do to take your mind off of Monday?”
His eyes dart to my mouth, his tongue peeks out to wet his, he closes the distance between us. I stop him with a hand to the chest, I don’t want him to kiss me to take my mind off my cancer. I want our first kiss to be when the thought of staying away from me sounds like a nightmare and we can't wait one more second.
“Don’t do that to take my mind off it, don’t ruin our first.”
He gives me a shy, embarrassed expression, making my heart melt. So many people see the tough businessman exterior Parker hides behind, but he’s so much more than that. Once you sneak under his skin you find this amazing man who stands beside you, helping with whatever he can and holding your hand when there’s nothing he can do.
“Let’s go make sure Owen hasn’t scared Carrie yet,” He whispers before his hands grip the back of my thighs, he picks me up and carries me towards them. I wrap my legs around his waist, my arms tightening around his neck and I burry my face in his shoulder. I can only imagine the things that will be said when we walk in there.
23
Parker
THE SECOND I STEP INTO the living room; all eyes are on us. Owen’s devilish smirk appears, Lucas chuckles to himself and the woman on the couch looks scared.
“Hey, Carrie, I'm Parker.” I hold out a hand to shake hers, never putting Logan down. I’ll carry her forever if it keeps her wrapped around me like this.
“Parker! Put me down.” She throws her head back laughing, the sound filling my chest with warmth and happiness.
“Nah, I don’t wanna.” I settle on an overstuffed chair, Logan on my lap. “How much is Owen traumatizing you?”
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