by K C Luck
Finally, she sighs and walks to the bar. “Anything?” she offers while picking up the bottle of bourbon and splashing a little in a glass. I shake my head, watch her down the liquid in a single swallow, and realize she is more shaken by all of this than she appeared. Not sure what else to do, I go to her, and when I put my hand on her shoulder, she slips into my arms naturally, as if we held each other many times.
“We can't do this, you know,” she murmurs into my shoulder, and an ache in my heart makes me catch my breath. There is so much sadness in her voice, and I know she doesn't want to send me away any more than I want to leave. Perhaps purely physical, maybe something more, but there is a growing bond between us. To sever it now will hurt. Closing my eyes, I accept what I can't change.
“I know,” is my reply. Neither of us moves, although this is no doubt my cue to go. I can’t bring myself to do it. She feels too good in my arms, and when she is there, I know Lila is safe. No intruder can come in the night and threaten her. Or worse. “Let me sleep on the loveseat. To protect you.”
At this, Lila chuckles lifting her head to look up at me. “You? On the loveseat? You’re twice as long as the thing.”
“Then in the chair. I am military and have slept in much more difficult places.” She touches my face to quiet me, and the feel of her hand on my skin is warm, sensual, and arousal flares back to life. My desire to protect her is only part of the reason I want to stay. I want to be near her, in whatever capacity. “I need to know you are safe.” Lila studies my eyes for another moment before standing on tiptoe and kissing my lips.
“Then, take me to your room,” she says. And I do.
11
This time there is no preamble of drinks or her collection of scarves. Just two people who want to touch each other. I move the robe off her shoulder and finger the thin strap of the modest, silky and sexy nightgown she added once her friends arrived. “I want to take this off of you,” I say, and she smiles running a hand up my forearm before tugging at the sleeve of the white robe I am wearing.
“And I want this off you. But first, kiss me. Please.”
The woman who made demands in her bedroom earlier tonight is gone and replaced by what I believe is the real Lila. Not that she doesn’t want control of things, as she is a powerful woman with multiple world-renowned organizations to run and a fortune to manage. People come to her with needs, and she fills them whenever she can. Still, she always does so with kindness and compassion. This is the woman I see now. Loving. It is my honor to kiss her.
As I dip my head to meet her lips, they are soft and tender, but still, an underlying hunger feeds our caress. A gentle touch does not mean there is no passion to it. Quite the opposite as a whisper of wanting can be as erotic as any scream of release. When she parts her lips to invite me in, I tease her with my tongue before going deeper. Moving my hands to her shoulders, I slip my fingers further under her robe to the straps of her nightgown to lower them, and she lets the clothing fall to the floor. As she stands in front of me naked, a moan escapes my throat, and our kiss becomes more heated. Tongues colliding, hungry, I cannot get enough of her mouth, and it makes me want more of her.
Sliding my hand down, I cup her breast and rub my thumb over the hard tip. She shivers with anticipation. The need in me to take her to the bed, to put my mouth everywhere, battles with my resolve to go slow. To cherish her and this moment. Knowing if I keep touching her, I will not be able to contain myself, I step back. Slowly, I untie the belt of my robe before slipping it off, leaving me in nothing but the trousers I put on earlier. I watch her eyes drink me in before I reach for the button of my pants to remove them. “Let me,” she says moving closer again, gently pushing my hands aside to take over. It is a sensual movement, not aggressive or meant to control. I tingle with excitement as her fingers unfasten me, and she slides her hands inside my waistband to push them down. Before I step out to free my legs, Lila kneels in front of me. “I want to taste you,” she murmurs, and I clench my jaw forcing myself to be still.
Patience, usually my strength, is torture now, and I nearly come at the sight of her, so willing, so wanting, down on her knees before me. “I want that, too,” is all I can say, and then her mouth is on me. Her tongue parts my lips, and she finds my throbbing clit. Tantalizing circles caress me, and I cannot fight the instinct to put my hands in her hair to pull her closer. Her hands slide around my thighs, grabbing my backside, and she starts to suck on my clit. The pleasure is so intense I feel my legs shake. Hundreds of reps on the leg press in the weight room, and at this moment, I can barely stay standing. “Fuck, you’re going to make me come already,” I growl from deep in my throat. Gentle, slow, long pulls with her mouth, and then it is too much. I arch my hips into her and let the roll of an orgasm take me over. “Lila, Jesus,” is all I can mutter in the intensity of the moment, and as the waves wash over me, there will be no more waiting to take Lila to the bed. I must have her, ravish her.
Even while my muscles still quiver from release, I scoop her into my arms. She lets out a small cry of surprise, but her eyes twinkle with excitement. In only a few of my long strides, I am at the bedside and setting her on the covers where I take a moment to savor her nakedness. Locking eyes with me, she trails her hand down her breast to a tight nipple. I lick my lips, watching her squeeze and tickle herself. Her confidence with her body is so sexy, and any resolve I may have held is gone.
Lowering myself, letting my body cover hers, we intertwine until my thigh is between her legs, and hers is between mine. The touch of hot skin on skin makes me moan, and she gasps. “You're so wet,” she whispers. “I love I can do that to you.”
I kiss her neck sliding my lips along her chin. “I have wanted you from the minute I first saw you in the lobby,” I murmur, only to feel her body stiffen ever so slightly.
“No,” she whispers. “Don’t say that.” Her words from earlier play through my mind again. That this cannot go on past tonight, but I won’t let the thought of what tomorrow might bring distract me. Not now. Instead, I kiss her harder. She responds with more urgency as if she is thinking exactly what I am. Time is short.
The desire to possess her takes me over, and as I break the kiss to slide down her body to take a nipple in my mouth, I let my hand keep going. As she arches her back to press against my hungry mouth, I shift to slide my hand down and find her swollen and ready. She is as excited as I am, and even if we can’t continue past tonight, knowing she wants me now is all I care about. Parting her lips, I move inside with two fingers. She is tight but yields with a small cry of pleasure.
Lifting my head from her breast to look into her eyes, I start to slowly fuck her. “I love filling you, spreading you,” I growl, and she closes her eyes. After a pause, Lila answers so quietly I almost can’t hear it.
“I love it, too.”
Gently, she raises her hips to match my stroke. In response, I press my body against her thigh. Using the push of my movements to drive my fingers deeper inside with each thrust, her breath grows ragged. Her hands grab at my back, the light rake of her fingernails making me groan. Every thrust of my body moves me closer to coming, but I need it to be with her. If we don’t get more, if this is all we have, I want it to be enough.
Again, I kiss her neck nipping at the racing pulse, and Lila quivers. “How are you doing this to me?” she whispers. “I can’t let it feel like this—”
Before she can ask me to stop, I move faster increasing the pace of my fingers sliding in and out of her. “Yes, you can,” I respond. “Give in.”
“No. You don’t understand—” She isn’t able to finish before I feel her contract around my fingers. Her entire body shakes, and she rolls from side to side as if she is trying to escape from the intensity of the pleasure. “Oh God, I'm coming so hard,” she says in a long cry, and at the passion of these words, I tip over the edge into my own orgasm.
Together we continue to move for another minute keeping the intensity while we milk the climax until
we are both spent and stop, still intertwined and gasping. Sweat makes her skin glisten, as I know mine does, and the smell of sex fills the room. Gently, I lift enough to kiss her on the lips. She sighs from the contact but does not return it. That is when I notice her cheeks are wet from tears. Furrowing my brow, I worry for a moment I hurt her. “Are you all right?”
She shakes her head. “No. I am not.” Now I raise up on my elbow, concern making my stomach clench. Before I can ask more questions, she looks at me and puts a hand on my cheek. “What am I going to do with you?” I am not sure how to answer, so wait. This makes her smile, and she slips her hand around the back of my neck to pull me down for a kiss. “My strong, silent lover.” She sighs. “Everything I could want.” The kiss is passionate, and I realize we are not finished. As she pushes at my shoulder to slide me onto my back, I relish the sight of her suddenly straddling me. “If this is all I get of you, I hope you don’t mind if I take full advantage.”
I put my hands on her hips, pulling her tighter against me. “Never.”
She sighs at my answer and looks up at the ceiling for a moment. “Why now?” she asks the universe. There is no answer, so instead, I take her again. And again. And again.
12
As I stand near the beginner’s slope and watch Lila instruct Claire on how to balance her weight on the skis, a yawn escapes. If I have to admit it, I’m a bit tired this morning. The feel of Lila still lingers, as does the memory of her straddling me, squirming under me, and crying out with pleasure in my ear. A hint of her scent keeps coming to me as if she has permeated my senses entirely. Even in the crisp cold breeze, I tingle with a lingering heat under my ski jacket and pants. Last night's lovemaking was incredible; possibly the best of my life. Our touches are electric. Our chemistry is almost impossible to comprehend. And how I feel inside when I kiss her… There is a tug of sadness to think there won’t be more for us, but even so, Lila has changed me forever.
As the two women undertake another short, but from appearances, what will be a successful trip down the slope, I feel a presence beside me. Glancing over, I see Madison looking up the slope watching Claire navigate the hill. There is no mistaking the look of desire, intermixed with tenderness, on her face. “She’s good,” I say and see Madison nod.
“Yes, she is.”
Pausing, I could take the answer in more than one way. Including sexually. But the shine of love in Madison’s eyes tells me she means it as straightforward as it sounds. Claire is good. There is a sensual, yet also sincere air about her that a complete stranger could not miss. Before I comment on my impression of Claire, I notice she and Lila are finishing the run and coming at us. In a flash, I realize Claire is not slowing quickly enough. She will undoubtedly collide with us, and as I move to catch her, I am actually too slow as Madison steps out to take Claire in her arms and stop her slide. The two laugh then kiss lightly. A look passes between them, and for a second, I feel a pang of jealousy. So free to be so much in love. Something impossible for me to have with Lila.
“Shall we go inside?” Lila offers interrupting my thought, and when I look into her face, there is a flicker of something in her eyes. Regret? Not because she wants Madison for herself, but because she also wants love? I wonder if she wishes things between us could be different. Then, the look is gone, and her warm smile is back in place. “I could use a hot drink.”
Kneeling to help Claire out of her skis, Madison nods. “I like that idea. Up to the summit lodge then?” She stands once the boots are unfastened and offers Claire a hand while looking at Lila. “Then, you and I can do a last run? Down a champion slope, perhaps?”
Frowning, I am not a fan of the idea. It would require Lila being out of my sight for a time, yet I know my skills are not up to such a challenge. As if sensing my unease, Lila puts a hand on my sleeve as we move as a group toward the lifts to take us to the summit lodge. “You and Claire can be waiting for us at the bottom.” She looks into my face and gives me a reassuring smile. “Madison can watch over me, although I highly doubt there will be anything to worry about.”
“I'll still worry,” I murmur, and our eyes linger tempting me to lean in and kiss her lips. Taking a deep breath, I restrain myself. Barely. Again, a hint of regret shows in Lila’s eyes as she stares at my mouth, clearly guessing what I am thinking. No more kisses, no matter how much we want it. Still, when our turn comes to step up to the ski lift and sit down, I can’t stop myself from discreetly taking her hand. She does not resist me and instead holds on tightly. The ride up can’t last long enough as we sit together, hip to hip, fingers grasping each other. We don't let go until the very final second before we stand up. When we break apart, I want to say something, tell her I can’t stop thinking about her, but then she hurries forward slipping an arm through the crook of Claire’s elbow. Sadness washes over me. I want her, and I know she wants me, but… Before I can finish the thought, Madison falls back to walk beside me. “Come to the bar so we can get the drinks.”
I'm puzzled by the request, as a waiter would definitely serve us, but curious, I agree. “Not in the mood to wait?” I ask.
Madison shrugs. “Patience is not my strong suit.” At this, I am not at all surprised. We leave the other two at a table near the giant fireplace, and when we are out of earshot, Madison puts a hand on my elbow. She leans in. “I see how you look at her. Don't get carried away. Last night was undoubtedly incredible, but you need to let her go. Do you hear me?”
Every instinct in me wants to jerk my arm away, perhaps even turn and push her across the room, but I pause. My intuition tells me Madison is not one to make idle threats or suggestions out of jealousy. There is a reason behind her statement, and I want to know it. “Not that it is any of your fucking business, but why?” I ask with a snarl. Once we reach the bar, Madison waves someone over and gives him our order for vin chaud all around. While we wait, she turns to me. Her eyes study my face, and I can tell she is not sure how much to say. “Just spit it out,” I say, and Madison nods.
“You’re right. You need to know this.” She glances around to see if anyone is listening to us before continuing. Seeing no one is, she looks back at me. “A couple decades ago, Lila had a special lover, a young woman doctor from the middle east. They worked side by side in a lot of remote countries to help bring vaccines and medical care to those with no other access.”
Taking this information in, I nod but say nothing letting her keep going. “They were quite a pair,” Madison continues. “Totally in love with each other. Engaged, even though you couldn’t really get married back then.”
At this, I frown. “And? Is there some connection here?”
Madison looks me hard in the eye. “You look at lot like her, act a lot like her,” she says.
“Well, I’m not,” I respond, irritated the woman might think I’m put off by anything in Lila’s past. “And I’m confident Lila realizes that. Now, the drinks are arriving, so if you don’t mind—”
“The doctor died,” Madison interrupts. “Killed by a rebel faction.”
I take in a breath and contemplate this. In some ways knowing the information helps me understand Lila a little better. “And Lila never recovered from it,” I state. It is not a question, but Madison nods anyway.
“If you do remind her of the doctor, getting close but then leaving will only hurt Lila more.” Madison’s eyes harden. “So, don’t.” Before I think of a response, she picks up two of the drinks and walks away. I hurriedly do the same and follow.
“That took long enough,” Lila says with a smile as we reach the table, and Madison shrugs as she hands one mug to Claire before sitting down. Claire blows on it before taking a sip.
“Well, it was worth it. This is fantastic,” she says.
I settle in beside Lila handing her a mug. She mimics Claire’s movements and then licks her lips. “You’re so right.” After another sip, she turns to me. “Try it, darling.” As soon as she says it, all four of us at the table grow quiet. A blush c
omes to Lila’s cheeks before she laughs it off and winks at Madison. “Good grief, I sound like one of your movie stars.” We all join in with a chuckle, but the endearment still touches me. The slip was sincere, and I hear Madison's warning in my mind. It makes so many of the puzzle pieces fall into place. Lila, so loving and perfect, but no commitment all this time? Whispers of lovers, including Georgia DeLane, but never of love. It doesn’t take a genius to put it together. If she gave her heart to the doctor, and then lost the woman she loved entirely, and in so horrible a manner, then Lila's elected to never put herself in that position again. Including with me.
“Claire asked you a question,” I hear Madison say interrupting my thinking.
“Sorry,” I respond giving Claire a smile. “What was it you said?”
She smiles in return, gracious and forgiving of my not paying attention. “I asked if you will ride back on the gondola with me?” she asks. “While these two crazy people make a final run?”
I glance out the window and don't like what I see. Not one bit. The daylight is fading, and a bit of snow has started. Still, this is clearly something Lila wants to do. One run shouldn’t hurt anything, yet I can’t help but feel a twist of anxiety in my stomach. “It will be fine,” Lila assures me resting a hand on my forearm. The heat of her touch flares a need in me, and when her eyes widen, I know she feels it too. As much as we will try to fight it, the attraction between us is not likely to fade quickly. If ever. I don’t care if Lila loved another and is afraid. Perhaps the time has come for her heart to open up again. I could be that person for her, right or wrong.