by Corbin, C. R
But how the hell were we going to do that?
"I'll handle it." said Dez as he hopped onto the boulder, his arm was still on his wound and I find myself wanting to pull him back in fear that he might collapse into the water and be washed away or open up his wound again but he makes the jump without any trouble at all. The water splashed onto his armor and his face, wetting his hair and granting his skin a glow that was lacking beforehand. The more I look at him the more I find that I am...enraptured by his gaze.
"Alright, one of you hop over and grab me to get across!" he shouted and the three of us looked at one another, about to faint from the sheer nervousness that was flowing through all of us.
"I...I don't...." Kelly said.
"Yeah I don't know. Maybe we can just stay here near the water and maybe they won't see us?" Josh asked and Dez grew impatient.
"Someone jump! You! Human man! Jump and grab onto me!" said Dez and I allowed a smile to creep across my face at the term "human man". It sounded so strange but that's the kind of cultural clash that you came across when encountering aliens I suppose. Luckily all of our translator implants were adapted to translate all 4 of the major races.
"Fine...here goes." said Josh as he stepped back a few feet before making a mad dash and leaping. Dez digs his claws into the stone to keep himself in place as Dez leapt into his grasp. The two of them looked like they were really not into it at all.
"Jump to the other side! You can make it!" shouted Dez, to be honest the branch wasn't that far off and Josh could probably jump but he was still feeling a great deal of nervousness.
"Do it you idiot!" shouted Dez and that seems to jolt Josh out of his fearful stupor. Josh's face crumpled into an angry expression and he leapt without worry, gripping onto the nearby branches and surmounting them without much effort at all.
"After you Kelly." I remarked and she frowned.
"Ugh why couldn't we be stranded in grassland." she remarked and palmed at her face before turning to face Dez and running. She leapt through the air and into his arms and he captured her into his grasp before letting her make the leap onto the branch that was suspended near the stone.
As I watch him clutch her this overwhelming sense of jealousy and fury overcomes me and I growled. I wanted her off of him as soon as possible and I couldn't place a finger on why...oh god don't get possessive over a guy that you just met and can barely trust! The very thought of me getting jealous over such a tiny action seemed so strange and yet the anger that I felt was so...intense.
"Alright well...here goes." I remarked and faced him. I hopped and gripped him as tightly as I could when I landed. His body was so thick, so much rock hard muscle lingered on every inch of him and I was completely enraptured.
"Nice landing." he remarked with a sly smile as I dashed my cheek across his chest, the slick armor whipped over my cheek and I looked up into those blue eyes. His golden skin was shining from the mist and I was quivering as his strong arms held me there. Through the gaps between the plates I could feel some of his muscle, that thick rock hard flesh tensed up while sliding against me and I find that I am loathed to release my grip.
"Alright well....thanks." I said with a grin, my face was flushed and I was nestling into his grasp. His expression lit up as soon as he saw that first smile out of me, that first grin as if he was so proud that he had actually managed to make me smile for him.
"Now hold on alright?" he asked me and I raised an eyebrow.
"What?" I asked him as he bent his knees while grasping me. I felt like a toy in his arms, he was so big and strong compared to me that it was all I really was. He soon proved his might by leaping up with me in his grasp and gripping the branch, pulling himself up and scaling over to solid ground with only one arm and his feet. His claws dug into the soil and the wood as he inched his way closer and closer until we both rolled onto the ground near the river.
"Holy crap..." I muttered as we finally rested our knees on the soil, he looked at me and grinned, I growled and slapped my hand across his face.
"What was that for? Look, I couldn't do that with everyone since I would get way too fatigued from it but you were the last one! It was perfectly safe!" he said with a snarl.
"For almost getting us killed! You know how risky it is to have pulled something like that with one arm?! You could reopen your wounds!" I stated.
"And leave you to grab that branch all by yourself? Perish the thought Amanda." he stated and I scoffed before turning away, trying to hide the grin that was plastered across my face.
"You do have to admit that it was fun though." he stated and I slowly nodded before letting him see the small grin that was marking my face.
"Yeah...that was fun." I admitted with that grin creeping up, a grin that was soon reflected back to me in that mirror of mine that was sitting across from me, him.
"Alright well....where do we head now?" asked Josh and Dez gets to his feet, gripping his wound and sighing.
"Well....downstream and a bit inland would be nice." he remarked and we all nodded, following him as he made his way through the thick jungle.
As we continue to wander I find myself staring at him and wondering what this strange feeling that dwelled inside of the crook of my soul was. Why was I hungering for his gaze all over again? Why was I wishing that he would look over at me and smile or shoot me a small gaze that indicated some minute joy that would be nearly indistinguishable from stoicism to anyone else but I? What was there in that look of his that made me hunger for it so much?
I didn't know and it didn't disappear.
As we continue to walk through the forest I keep on thinking to that wound in his stomach. To have been betrayed by your comrades in such a manner must have been extremely painful but he seemed to be unfazed entirely, almost like he was expecting them to do this to him. It would be like Kelly betraying me, it was unimaginable and I can't picture it and yet he still soldiers on. At times during our trek the afternoon sun peaks through and dances across his face, it illuminates those high cheekbones and his firm jawline and in his eyes I can see that there is this sense of...regret lingering.
"Tom was telling me that he was going to get his certification right after we got back. He was going to...go somewhere I guess. Shit he graduated top of the class and this is what he gets for all of that work." remarked Josh with a wistful smile.
"Same thing was going to happen to Maria, she was just awarded her Phd too which makes it even sadder....She had gotten an offer and was going home. She was going home to be....she was..." said Kelly as she turned and wiped a few tears away. We were all passing around stories about those that had perished in the attack, I can't speak to many of them since I didn't know anybody that well but what ate away at me was the dreams that these people were about to achieve. What was about to occur and how they were going to win at this game of life until something came in and ripped it all away.
And when I gazed at Dez there was this overwhelming look of sadness dashing over his eyes.
He gazed at me and frowned, where there had been stoicism and indifference prior it seems like during all of those tales about these people that had died something snapped and there was actual...emotion lingering. There was joy, there was the fits of rage that he would have when he presumably thought about those men that had betrayed him and yet that one emotion had been missing but only now reappeared, sadness.
What kind of man were you Dez? A man that is capable of that sort of look in his eyes is not some heartless monster that would be working with the animals that took down the camp, that gaze couldn't belong to such a demon.
"The sun is getting low." he remarked and looked up into the canopy, we were walking in nearly pitch-black darkness before we saw a small patch of afternoon light in the distance. It was a bit larger than the rest, all of the trunks were rather spaced out from one another, and he beckoned us towards it.
"Come, we should set up camp here. I think we're far enough, any furt
her and we might run too far from the river." he remarked and I nodded, walking over to one of the tree trunks and sliding down to sit.
I gazed at him as we both stand there after the long journey that we both had. I keep my gaze leveled with his and sighed as his blue eyes dashed over me. I see the flicker of enrapturement and adoration rush through his glance as he makes his way over to a nearby tree and stripped his armor off. He lets it fall to the ground and wanders off into the darkness, presumably to clean off. There was a small stream with light shining onto it nearby, probably a tributary of the larger river. He walks towards it and I let him leave while fixated on that body of his.
His legs tensed up as he stepped over the branches and the soil, his ebony claws dig into the ground and he stepped forward with a hand on his stomach. He flexed and I watched his back tense as all of that rippling muscle shimmered in front of me. I watched him with a great deal of wonderment, the sunlight falls down his back and dropped onto the floor, his white hair shining as he gets further and further away. I hear Josh and Kelly gathering brush for the fire and I turned to aid them but still managed to glance over at him while he waited near the river and cleaned himself off.
I set the pile of sticks and dead leaves down in the center of our little encampment and a flame is lit using one of the lighters that Kelly had on her. It flickers to life and the smoke rises, trickling amongst the leaves and dispersing in the canopy and as it reached the heavens it is practically invisible to all. I look back at him while he waited at the brook and I wandered over, my steps were soft and I rested my hands near the little river bed while gazing at my reflection in the water. All of those flaws appeared and were only magnified by the lack of sleep as well as the dirt. Those curves, those eyes that lacked the same power or intellect that everyone that perished a couple days ago had, they were both reflected back at me. Slowly my blank expression gives way to a frown until a splash of water from his movements washes that reflection away into a collection of ripples.
CHAPTER FIVE
Dezdrin
Sadness marks that same face once more and I find that I abhor its sight, especially when she could see how she looked as well. The water flickered over her face as I splashed some water in her direction purposefully to eliminate that depressing image that was being mirrored back at her. I run the water across my neck, my bare chest, my wound, my face, I was practically dripping with it as I turned to face her. It flows in between the cracks of my muscles and she keeps her eyes on me as I began to speak with my entire body glistening in the dim sunlight with the water.
She looked like she was completely distracted by it.
"You look troubled. Still thinking that you weren't worthy enough?" I asked and she jolted to attention
"How did you know?" she asked
"From the conversations that were occurring I got the hint that you didn't know anybody back there too well so this is likely not due to mourning is it?" I asked and she bites her lip trying to protest until realizing that I was right.
"You don't have to put it like that. I'm still bothered by the fact that they're dead." she remarked and I shrugged.
"I know you are but from the way they spoke you are not nearly affected enough to wear such a frown across your face." I remarked.
"I..." she began but was unable to finish.
"It's not a crime not to feel." I muttered, half believing what I had just said.
"It's a crime to not feel any empathy for those that have lost it all."she remarked.
"Surely. But it is acceptable to admit to yourself that you had no connection to those who perished and that the lack of any extreme emotion regarding it is acceptable, is it not? That's not what we're talking about here though Amanda. We're referring to that look on your face, that depressed gaze that lingers." I remarked.
"I just....I don't know. When we were talking today it gave me the impression that they all were headed for so much more than what I am destined for." she remarked and I scoffed.
"How do you know what you're destined for?" I asked her and she shrugged.
"Sometimes you just know your worth. Sometimes you just have to accept it." She remarked and I frowned.
"You and I both know that nothing is set in stone...hell I could have told myself I was going to die back there but I kept on going and here I am now in front of you. This weakness, this doubt that flows through you will be a thorn in your side the longer you covet it." I said and she turns from her reflection angrily. She had splashed some water onto her hair and her face and was brushing through the brown locks with her fingers, all of those warm droplets falling from her chin and onto the ground while she looked over at me. I keep my gaze on her and sighed as she bites her lips and shakes her head.
"I don't know what to think...I feel like i'm just wasting time when I look at them. Like all of this has been...wasted. It's not right that such potential was tossed away you know?" she asked and I nodded.
"It isn't....but what we do now can remedy that. We shouldn't ponder what has been lost but what can be rebuilt from the ashes." I remarked and reached out to rest a hand on her shoulder. My wet fingers press into the soft fabric of her shirt and she looked at me, her curves shifted under my grasp and I smiled at her, a genuine smile that wasn't filled with hints of playfulness or sarcasm but...actual joy.
"Thanks." she said with a grin and lifted her hand up to paw at the one currently on her shoulder. I nod slightly and looked back at the waters. Should I tell her now? Should I inform her of what she was? No, it was much too soon, this had to wait. This had to wait until she was ready.
"Well I guess I should wash up huh? I must look like a mess." she remarked and I shook my head.
"Even with all of that grime you must be the most beautiful woman in this galaxy in my book." I stated and she blushed.
"Yeah well...most guys don't think like you do. I wish they did but...they all get hung up on this body, these curves." she remarked while staring at her torso, I smiled, it was quite attractive for a woman to have such physical attributes in my opinion.
"Then they are fools. A woman such as yourself would be universally hailed for her beauty back on Jorath." I said and she laughed, smiling while splashing some water onto her face. She seemed to be in a much better mood than the one that had lingered once she had stepped over to this small stream next to me.
"And how does that whole thing work on Jorath? Would I have millions of admirers begging to marry me?" she asked and I paused. Marriage? What kind of word was that?
"Marriage?" I asked and she nodded.
"Yeah you know like....you don't have marriage on Jorath?" she asked and I paused, biting my lip and wondering if I should tell her before simply settling on the definition.
"We find a mate. Each man only has one per lifetime and each woman has only one per lifetime. Once you find them well...then they stay together. Forever. It is destiny and never has a bond broken before." I relayed and she paused.
"So have you found yours?" she asked me and I shake my head.
"No I haven't. If she's out there she's likely on Jorath but I pray to the gods that she is even half as pretty as you are human." I remarked.
"Well thanks for the compliment...most back home don't think the same way as you do so it's good to hear from a different perspective....it would be nice to have a relationship like that though. Where I come from marriages are frequently broken off." She remarked and I shook my head.
I glanced her over while I complimented her appearance and everything that I saw only reinforced the sentiment that she was the one for me. It only reinforced the idea that she was the woman that I was waiting for this entire time. The way those brown locks of hair danced across her face while stretching down to her shoulders and the way she sighed while those blue eyes shone in the light was incredible. I can barely contain myself as my eyes wander down to her body. Those ample breasts pressed against that simple white shirt that was somewhat stained with dirt.
Those ample mounds threatened to pop out and her curves seemed so smooth, so soft. I practically towered above her and could do anything I wanted to her physically and yet she could stop me in my tracks with just a glance. How I wanted to pin her down right here and dash my hands across her body to feel every inch of her but I knew that she hasn't accepted me fully yet. Not yet. It would still take time for her to accept.
"Never will a mating bond break. It will suffer all that is possible until death itself." I remarked and she smiled.
"Forever huh?" she asked while we both glanced at the stream, the yellow sunlight barely peeking through as the fire illuminated the entire area behind us. I keep my gaze on the water and watched as her image flickered in the ripples and we both shared this moment of silence before that guilt came creeping back up my spine.
A guilt that told me that my deception could not last forever.
#
Amanda
"Wish we had something to eat." remarked Kelly while she sipped on her water, Josh sighed.
"Didn't we have some candy bars in your bag?" asked Josh.
"We ate those earlier remember?" I asked him and he nodded
"Now I remember..." He said with a frown as I glanced behind me to see Dez sitting in a branch about 10 feet above ground, he was leaning with the back of his head against the tree, staring at the fire and more specifically, staring at me.
It was late in the night and we were all exhausted from the trip that we had but we managed to stay up long enough to chat. There were more stories of those that had perished that were being passed around but for the most part we simply were discussing ways to get out of this mess entirely.