“I got you. Look at these.” Cole started flexing his poor excuse for muscles. “I’ll watch over Delilah. Not V. She can kick my ass.”
By the time Lilah and V joined me in middle school, Lilah was already being approached by agents and producers in unexpected places like malls and restaurants, all wanting to represent her for either modeling or acting because of her height and looks. Delilah would laugh. “Don’t you need to be an actor to act?”
“Not these days, Pretty D,” said Viola.
Lilah thought she was average and that those people were insane. All she wanted to do was read novels, not stand in front of a camera showing she was already five foot five. I was already five foot nine and didn’t know I had six more inches to go.
My sister’s full name eventually no longer caused my father pain. It soon brought pride. Dad saw that he and I were somehow raising Lilah to be a beautiful, kindhearted young woman even though we weren’t sure how we were accomplishing such a task. But Lilah’s tendency to be a pleaser, we thought at the time, was just her being reserved and extremely mature. I didn’t realize the lengths she would go to in making sure my father and I were tended to.
Eighth grade arrived and was a turning point. Girls who were not my sister or V were becoming a sort of a beacon for me. I didn’t quite know why I needed them so damn bad, but I was having an absolute blast figuring it out. Their skin was so soft, their lips tasted like nothing else I’d ever known, and they smelled a hell of a lot better then my teammates.
In our middle school hallway, a shorter and younger version of long-legged V asked me, “Is there a girl you haven’t kissed in this school?”
I thought about it for a moment then answered, “You.”
“Dream on, baseball cowboy.” And she walked away.
Playing sports after school made it easy to get the attention of cute middle-school cheerleaders in little skirts. So I tried out for every sport and luckily made the teams, then rounded up the girls in herds—according to V. Personally, I didn’t see what the problem was.
Another reason for eighth grade being a monumental year was my sister. Her boobs kept growing, and guys thought she was a treat on a stick. They salivated with every stare. I was constantly defending her honor and my ego. But it wasn’t just her body that captivated them. They were drawn to her like leaves in the wind. Wind cannot be held responsible for the leaves caught up and carried off in its natural ways. Just being quiet, Lilah showed gifts of attraction, and she seemed remorseful for those ensnared.
She claimed to have no need or desire for a boyfriend or a partner. She once told me, “No man will ever live up to the one I have created in my mind, so why try?”
Viola snickered, “Tell me, Pretty D: what kind of handsome lives in your head?”
Lilah got all dreamy eyed. “Tall, dark hair, hazel eyes—”
“What the hell is wrong with brown eyes?” I asked.
“I love them, personally.”
“Thank you, V.”
Lilah ignored us as usual and kept describing her perfect man. “Not a feminine trait to be seen. A brute strength yet as gentle as can be when it comes to loving me.”
Viola and I howled with laughter. V patted my knee. “She has GOT to stop reading all that nonsense!”
My sister read romance novels constantly, and I was A-OK with some figment of her imagination keeping her entertained because I was busy enough fighting back the live males who chased her around.
Lilah also declared she already had two males in her life and that her hands were full enough caring for Dad and me. And take care of us Lilah did. In between mushy romance books, she watched one baking show after another, studying the craft and art of cooking. My father and I would follow Lilah around the grocery store, pushing a cart as she filled it up with all kinds of ingredients for her next cooking escapade. People would eye this young girl in complete amazement as she would say something odd like, “I need fresh dill weed for this recipe.” My dad and I would both shrug, wondering what the fuck dill weed was.
Cole, Hu, and Bryce were the rare few who wouldn’t hit on or speak shit about my sister. They didn’t seem interested either way, and those goofballs were too busy chasing tail to be around when I needed help the day I exploded. It was a rough fight—four against one usually was.
Derogatory comments were being shared in my sister’s presence, causing her shoulders to cave, so my swinging fist commenced. Delilah was soon screaming, and I was soon bleeding. Just when I thought I was going to lose, the new kid came out of nowhere and clocked one of the guys I was fighting in the nose. The new kid looked pissed and defensively aggressive. That took me by surprise because I didn’t even know him personally. I’d tried talking to him at the bus stop days earlier, but he hadn’t been interested, so I could fathom no reason for him wanting to help me out.
More punches were thrown, and the new kid and I ended up back to back, facing our attackers, ready and willing if they wanted more. I could feel him, as exasperated as I was. His rapidly expanding ribs bumped into mine, but we didn’t retreat. We stood sturdy and unified. At that moment, a silent brotherhood vow took place. We couldn’t control the link; it just happened.
That kid at my back, whoever he was, had become a lifer, someone who would be with me until the end. He helped me win my battle that day but didn’t look at me or introduce himself when it ended. He turned to my sister with worry. “Delilah, are you okay?”
“Yes. Thank you, Kenny, for helping my brother.”
Kenny.
Still a little breathless, I approached my sister, who was sniffling. “Tucker, this is Kenny. He is new here and in one of my classes.”
If I’d been beyond eighth-grade mentality, I would’ve shaken Kenny’s hand and properly thanked him, but I wasn’t, and it was the end of a school day, which meant only one thing. “Wanna get something to eat?”
Finally catching his breath also, Kenny shrugged and showed the same maturity. “Sure.”
Behind Kenny, I saw school personnel questioning other students about the fight. Peers only gave out shameless grins, claiming to have seen nothing, because none of us wanted to be suspended—including the ones I had just fought.
Kenny followed my glare over Lilah’s shoulder and saw what I was seeing. He looked back at me, and we became mind readers in a second flat. My mind told him, Yeah, we need to go.
He nodded, which—in mind-reading expertise—meant, Yeah, I’m seeing that.
Oblivious, rule-following Lilah was still carrying on. “I hope you guys don’t get in trouble because of me,” not noticing trouble, in the shape of adults, on the way.
I rolled my eyes, and Kenny started telling her, “Let’s get on that bus…”
She nervously nodded. As we walked away, I studied Kenny, who was looking at my sister with true concern, not with lust or the hope of sexual endeavors.
Kenny became my best friend.
After dinner, my dad said, “Well, Kenny, it was great to meet ya. You are welcome anytime. I gotta get back to the office for a couple of hours. Would you like a ride home?”
“Yes, sir,” said Kenny with reservation. “Thank you.”
“Tucker.” My dad pointed down the hall of our old home. “Go get this boy a fresh shirt so his mama don’t have my hide.”
“No, sir. My mama won’t care.”
Dad thought for a moment then smiled. “Well, I do. How’s that?”
Kenny’s eyebrows shot up in surprise, then he looked down at his lap. “That’s good, sir.”
I approached my dad and Kenny at our front door, right before they left, and handed Kenny a T-shirt. “Hey, you can keep this one. I outgrew it, but it may still fit you.”
Kenny slowly took the shirt and seemed in awe, examining it. I looked at him, silently asking, Ain’t no one ever given you something before?
With a deepening hue of shame, he mind-answered with a Nah, but it’s okay.
That was the first moment I took the time to
notice his attire. My stomach contracted into a tight ball. His clothes looked worn, and one of his sneakers had a hole. My dad must have already noticed Kenny’s shirt was battered from overuse. Dad said, “If you like that, Kenny, Tuck here can hook you up. He has a bag in his closet full of clothes he’s out grown.”
I didn’t, but I was understanding my dad completely. Kenny only nodded and seemed to suddenly find the carpet under his feet quite entertaining. Lilah observed the three of us interacting.
The next day at school, Kenny was wearing my T-shirt, but Lilah and I didn’t mention a thing about it. Our home was not extravagant, but we understood we were more fortunate than some ’cause we still had each other. I wasn’t sure who Kenny had—besides us.
Believe it or not, the same group of guys from the fight had remarkably grown a new pair of balls overnight and had the audacity to corner Lilah again. Kenny was between them and Lilah when I turned a corner and stumbled upon the confrontation.
Kenny saw me and gave me a look. You ready?
Got your back.
One of the assholes glanced at me. “Just trying to finish the conversation from yesterday, Tucker. Why does Delilah think she is better than everyone else? ’Cause she’s so hot?”
Delilah opened her mouth to reply, but I mowed her words over with my own. “Because she is better than you.”
“Tucker, I don’t believe that,” she tried to explain, but no one was listening to her.
Another asshole said, “Maybe she needs to learn her place—”
Kenny growled as he shoved the kid backward, which sent me into action, causing another throwdown. Lilah was in the midst of the confusion, trying to bring peace. “Please stop!” she said, not realizing this truly had nothing to do with her per se, just our inadequate egos.
My father wasn’t too pleased when he walked into the school office and saw Kenny and me sitting there, sulking because we were denied the finish of our second fight in two days. The school secretary happened to be my dad’s foreman’s wife. That was usually how small towns rolled.
Sheila looked up from her desk and greeted my dad. “Hello, John. Sorry to see your son in here.”
“Yes, ma’am. Me too.” He rustled my hair, letting me know he was proud of me for protecting Lilah.
Sheila added, “Mr. Swatts is out of the office today.” The principle being absent had my dad exhaling deeply. “And since the other boys involved in the altercation claim no fight transpired, I’m handing out a verbal warning. Tucker is free to go.”
“Thank you.” Dad’s shoulders relaxed, then he signed me out on the clipboard. “What about Kenny?”
Sheila was already back to work at her computer. “Uh, his mama isn’t answering, so Mr. Kenny is in limbo for the time being.”
After a second of silence, my dad smacked his forehead. “I’m such an idiot! His mama called me asking me to pick him up for her.”
The secretary glanced from her computer with a grin that said, You don’t really expect me to believe that. “Is that so?”
“Yep, yeah, so, uh, I will sign him out, uh, also. Here, on this, uh, clipboard.”
Your lying sucks, Dad.
And that was the first time my dad had to pick up two boys from school being sent home early for bad behavior, but no, it wasn’t the last. There were to be unexplainable pranks that were suspected to have been set by Kenny and me.
They were our fault. And so were more fights that were handled in small-town ways. Lots of old porches looked like new by the time Kenny and I were done paying our dues. There were no suspensions, just pissed-off parents accepting free labor as payment and a sister always trying to put out the fire before it was lit.
Kenny’s deep-rooted anger—which he never wanted to discuss—mirrored mine. I didn’t want to chitchat either. The anger and denial we shared became our common ground and what we both morphed into if Lilah couldn’t simmer us down before our tempers took possession of us. In retrospect, it was unfair to put that kind of responsibility on her naïve shoulders. It was like trying to have a chef in training become a lion tamer with no experience. Our fury must have been exhausting for her. Maybe that was why she never had a boyfriend. Then again, maybe no guy dared to get near her, knowing if he made her shed one fucking tear, Kenny and I would shred his worthless head.
Walking a wooded trail to go fishing one day, Kenny, Delilah, and I came face-to-face with a bobcat. It sized the three of us middle schoolers up and chose Lilah—the smallest.
Glancing at Kenny, we exchanged more silent conversation. You ready?
Hell yeah!
Growling, the big cat stalked my sister as she backed away with a horrified expression. Seeing her fear lit Kenny and me on fucking fire! As if we had no sense at all, we both threw our fishing poles and tackle boxes to the ground and charged forward. Maybe the bobcat was taken by surprise or simply not used to lunatics, but it ended up running away, dodging the rocks and sticks flying in its general direction.
“You motherfucker!” I screamed in an outrage of epic levels.
I might have been foaming at the mouth because Lilah ran up to me and wiped my chin with her hand then wiped her hand on her jean shorts. She kept repeating, “The cat is gone” as she touched our shoulders and chests, trying to calm the thunderstorm. “It’s gone… guys, calm down… it’s over… just hear my voice…”
She had just been faced with a possible violent pounce but had no time to comprehend the event or deal with the fear running through her. That was because she had to tame her lions.
Kenny was screaming, “Who does that fucking cat think he is!”
“A wild animal that lives in these woods?” Lilah laid her palms on his chest again while her body shook. “Shh, but it’s gone now… try to hear me.”
Fortunately, she was bringing us back down. I blew out air. “Fuck! I was so mad!”
Kenny held out his hands. “Look! Shaking like a leaf, man. I was gonna eat that cat for lunch!”
Trying to distract us, Lilah nervously laughed. “What kinda burger would that be—eww… never mind.” Thinking of pussyburgers had Kenny and me letting go of our anger and laughing our asses off. Delilah rolled her eyes. “I walked right into that one.” She inhaled as if she had averted a disaster.
The sun baking us while we fished at the edge of the lake had the three of us jumping into the water. We all sighed as our bodies thanked us for the temporarily relief from Georgia’s scorching heat. Even though we didn’t want to, we eventually had to say good-bye to the lake and head home. Following Kenny out of the water, Lilah examined his backside. “Kenny, are those teeth marks on your butt?”
Sure enough, Kenny’s swimming trunks had sagged because of the weight of the water—and because the shorts were mine—exposing the top portion of his ass. Of course, I looked away. “Dude! I’m impressed you got a girl so riled, but do I have to see it?”
Lilah tilted her head in question. “Kenny? You’re not a virgin?”
He had already pulled up his drawers before answering. “Not everyone is as pure as you, darlin’.” He looked at me. “You still holding on to the V card, Tuck?”
I had been kissing and touching girls like crazy but hadn’t realized any of them would have gone all the way with me, or I would have tried!
Like any guy would do, I lied. “Yeah, sure, uh, yeah… all the way to home base.”
Fucking Kenny and Lilah burst out laughing.
I lost my virginity two weeks later. I had believed all the bragging guys were liars. Who would have thought eighth-grade girls were already having sex? Not me, but I caught up in a hurry. Kenny taught me how to steal condoms, and sex was the final reason eighth grade changed my world. From that point on, I had a wingman to help put our stolen condoms to use and someone else to look after Delilah, the treasured jewel of my family.
When eighth grade ended for me, it was just beginning for Lilah, V, and Kenny. I had to leave them behind to go to high school. I had imagined that transfer
to be torturous, but Viola more than handled her own, plus no one wanted Diesel on their ass. His biker reputation was quite impressive. And because of having Kenny, I was at ease, knowing he would guard Lilah with his life.
Chapter Eighteen
Freshman year, my dad’s construction company exploded and was becoming quite the cash maker. Sports became a bore to me, so high school coaches were practically crying when I refused to try out.
“You sure about this, little man?” Diesel thought I should ride the gravy train of sports through college.
“Don’t you think I have outgrown that nickname?”
He smirked. “What do you want to be called?”
“Badass?”
“Become one, and the name is yours.”
“Fucker,” I mumbled in joking protest.
“Speaking of fuckers, is it because of Kenny you’re dropping from sports?”
I recoiled, thinking that was an absurd comment.
“Don’t become all sensitive, dumbass. I was just thinkin’ you and that kid are joined at the hip or some shit. And what’s up with his peculiar nighttime ways?”
As soon as the sun faded, Kenny would sometimes become a recluse and highly distracted in thought. Somewhat used to Kenny’s odd nighttime behavior, I shrugged. “Dunno. Almost always been the case.”
By the time Delilah, Kenny, V, and the gang were about to finish their freshman year of high school, Lilah was picking out kitchen cabinets to upgrade our old home, preparing it for sale, while she helped design the new home.
Looking at the blueprint, my dad said, “Lilah baby, you have a great sense of design. That would make my office perfect…”
Even though it was just my dad, Lilah, and me living there, my father insisted on more bedrooms, an office, and overall more living space as if anticipating company moving in.
At a young age, Delilah had already become the woman of our old home and held the title well. I didn’t know how it came so easily for her with my mom not there to teach her, but her home it was. By the time the new house was being built, her sophomore year, even the construction guys knew who to ask questions. She would have me stop by the construction site after school so she could hand out answers.
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