“You wronged Asmodeus. I could not interfere.”
I just stared at him. All this time, I’d held a secret hope that he just hadn’t known what had happened to me. While I wanted to stay on earth now, that didn’t change the fact that I also wanted my father to care where I was. I wanted him to have tried. I wanted him to have fought against whatever stood between him and me. But my hope had been useless. He didn’t give a damn about me. I was his demon fire daughter, the one he wanted to hide.
“You’re glad that he sent me here.” I sniffed and took a step toward him, my fisted hands trembling by my sides. “He did what you couldn’t. He did what you’ve always wanted to do yourself. Got rid of the demon.”
His eyes widened, and he glanced to the fallen angels behind me as if they held the answers to his sudden confusion. “How did you...how did you find out, Erela?”
“Don’t look to them like they’ve done something wrong. You want to know how I found out what’s wrong with me? My. Skin. Caught. Flames.”
My father stared at me for a long moment without saying a word, his forehead creasing between his eyes. After a long silent moment, he finally sighed. “I did not want you to find out that way. I would have told you. Eventually. It’s just...there was never a good time, Erela. You were days away from joining the Order of the Seraphim. You were going to be an incredible warrior. If I’d told you the truth about what you are, you never would have let yourself join.”
I opened my mouth to argue, but he held up a hand.
“Tell me I’m wrong. Tell me you would have continued to believe that you were worthy.” He gave me a look so full of meaning that my heart clenched tight. Tears burned my eyes. Everything within me wanted to argue against what he said, but deep down I knew he was right. I’d spent the last few weeks fighting hard against the truth of what I was. I still didn’t want to believe it was true, let alone use those powers I’d been born with.
If I’d known, I would have run far, far away from the Seraphim. Because I wouldn’t have felt worthy. And now I wasn’t sure I was worthy to fight in the Order of the Fallen, not after seeing what that other Nephilim could do.
“What are you even doing here?” I whispered, blinking back the tears. “Why are you in hell?”
He stiffened, and then glanced at the demon on the ground. “The portal between hell and earth has been reopened. That makes things unstable. I wanted to discover what plans are in place against Celestia. This male was my spy.”
I glanced at the ground, and my stomach squeezed tight. “Then, why did you kill him?”
“That isn’t important, Erela. What is important is getting you out of this realm.” He clucked his tongue and glanced at the Order of the Fallen who still stood silently behind me. “I assume you did not come here willingly?” His eyes darted toward Lilith.
A flicker of irritation went through me, and I shifted forward, blocking Lilith from my father’s view. “Lilith has been helping us. She didn’t bring us here. Asmodeus did. You know, the demon I pissed off.”
My father’s eyes glittered with barely-contained rage. It was something I’d never noticed about him until now. This expression. The hate. The anger. I’d always imagined him as cold and closed off, but there was something darker lurking below the surface. I didn’t know why I couldn’t see it before, but I sure as hell saw it now.
“Asmodeus has seen you?” he asked, his words clipped.
“Yes,” I said, frowning. “We tracked down the portal, hoping to close it. He was waiting for us. Apparently, my stealing his rat was bad enough for him to shove all of us through the portal.”
“I see.”
“Sir,” Ramiel said, clearing his throat and stepping forward. “My name is Ramiel, and I’m the leader of the Order of the Fallen. There’s been something I’ve been wanting to talk with you about for a long time now. Those of us who battle down on earth with the humans are in need of some assistance from Celestia. We could use more fighters, for one. More weapons. Now that the portal has been reopened, there are far more demons—”
My father held up his hand, and Ramiel fell silent.
“I understand your concerns. I will bring them to the other Archangels when I return to Celestia.”
Silence punctuated the alley.
“Thank you, sir,” Ramiel said.
“Now,” my father said, scanning his eyes across our group. “You shouldn’t be in this realm. However, getting you back isn’t as straightforward as it might seem. Come with me. I’ll take you to a safe house where we’ll make our plan. The portal is about five blocks away, but there’s an army of demons between here and there.”
“An army?” Lizzie asked. “How big of an army?”
My father pressed his lips together into a thin line. “There are hundreds of them.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Erela
My father took the lead. He ushered our group through the alleys of the demon city, the sharp peaks of the buildings looming high above us. We kept quiet. The threat of being discovered by the nearby army had settled in on the group, a cloud of worry hanging over all of us. Ramiel fell into step beside me, occasionally shooting worried glances my way and then ahead at my father. I could hear the silent question on his tongue. Was I okay?
The truth was, I had no idea if I was okay. I’d waited so long and I’d had so many questions I wanted to ask him, and yet I barely had a moment to voice them aloud before he shut down the conversation. And now, I knew what would happen next. We would be busy in the safe house making plans, and the next thing I knew I would be ushered right back through the portal and away from him. He wouldn’t follow. I knew it deep within my gut.
And then I might never see him again.
It wasn’t fair. But I didn’t know what I could do to change things.
Besides, I had gotten a few answers to some of my questions. He had known I’d been sent to Lower Realm, after all. And he knew it had been because of Asmodeus. He’d known where I was, with the Order of the Fallen, and he had done absolutely nothing to get me back home. He hadn’t even made an attempt to enter Lower Realm to make sure I was okay. I knew the rules. I knew that angels were not supposed to go down to the human earth, but I also knew that angels weren’t supposed to go to hell either. And yet here he was, cavorting around with the secret spy demon. Not to mention the fact that he must have come here before. Otherwise, I wouldn’t exist. So, I knew he broke the rules. I knew he traveled between realms whenever he wanted. Somehow, he was above the magic that controlled everyone else.
And yet he had not come to save me.
No matter what he said, no matter what excuse he gave, I couldn’t forgive that. So yeah. I hoped he would send me straight back to Lower Realm without so much as a goodbye, because I wasn’t entirely sure I needed that from him anymore. He’d done enough.
“Erela,” Ramiel whispered so low that I almost didn’t hear him. “I’m not entirely sure we should go with your father.”
I couldn’t help but roll my eyes. Ramiel, as much as I cared for him, had chosen the wrong time to try to have this discussion with me. I was getting sick and tired of males keeping secrets from me.
“Why? Are you afraid that he might compete with you on who’s the biggest secret keeper?” I didn’t even attempt to keep the sarcasm out of my voice.
“Erela.” Ramiel’s voice was pained.
I stopped suddenly and whirled toward him with an eyebrow raised. “What? I know you think you were just trying to protect me, but what you did was wrong. It is not much different than what he did.” I jerked my thumb toward my father who was still scurrying ahead, not realizing that I’d stopped and that everyone else had stopped around me.
“I was going to tell you,” he said, the volume of his voice rising, despite the fact that he was desperately trying to keep it low. “I don’t think you understand how terrifying it is to find a prophecy in a book about someone you love. A prophecy with her name attached, saying that she will di
e. Because of me. You have to understand that’s what all of this is about, Erela. That prophecy said that you will die. Because of me. Because of Sam. Because of Az. I know it could be about any of us, but I also know how I feel about you. My love could get you killed. And that’s terrifying. It’s far more horrifying than any demon I’ve ever faced. More terrifying than a hundred Hydras combined. I don’t know what I would do if you died. It would tear out a piece of my soul, a chunk so large that I don’t know how I would go on.”
My mouth fell open, my heart hammered hard in my chest. All I could do was stand there in the demonic alley, gazing up at the serious, cold, closed-off fallen angel who never wanted anyone to see his emotions. And yet he’d spilled out his guts, leaving them spread out on the grimy pavement between us. Tears sprang into my eyes, and the hardness around my heart began to thaw. How could I stay angry with him after that? How could I hate him for doing something that he thought was right?
I stepped forward and wrapped my arms around his neck, burying my face in his chest. He smelled like Ramiel, like sweat and dust and steel.
“Get away from her,” a hard, steely voice rang out from behind us. I pulled back to see my father glaring at us, his body radiating with anger. “I know one of you is the reason that my daughter fell, but I will not have you behaving this way in my presence. And especially not here out in the open in the demonic realm. Are you an idiot? All of you? And you.” He turned toward Lilith and flicked a finger between her and Rourke. “Do you not understand what Lucifer will do to you if he discovers that you are sleeping with a human?”
“Oh, I think she understands,” Az said, his own voice turning to steel as he stepped up close to my father. They were the same height, and even though Az did not glow with power like my father did, he looked just as intimidating, just as fierce. Maybe even more so. “And I imagine it’s very similar to what you and the other Archangels did to my family. What?” He sneered when my father raised his eyebrow in confusion. “That’s right. I’m a Malak. Gabriel and the others killed my family.”
My father’s nostrils flared. “I was not a part of that.”
“You’re an Archangel. You knew it was happening, even if you did not take part. You did nothing to stop it.”
The sound of rushing footsteps caused a sudden end to the confrontation. We all whirled toward the noise. It sounded as if there were dozens of them, heading straight for us. My father’s entire body stiffened, and he ground his teeth together.
“The army I told you about,” he said, his voice dripping with disdain. “Perhaps if you hadn’t decided to have a loud conversation in the middle of the streets near their army, they wouldn’t be heading straight toward us.”
Of course he was blaming this on me. He couldn’t take any blame for himself. He probably even blamed my fire powers on me when I hadn’t even asked for them, when I hadn’t even asked for him to sleep with a fire demon. He’d done all of that perfectly happily himself.
Ramiel put his hand on the hilt of his sword, but my father shook his head and jerked his thumb over his shoulder. “There are too many of them for us to fight. Hurry. If we go now, we’ll reach the safe house before they can find us.”
He turned without waiting for our reaction. He took the lead once again, taking us down a winding path through the jagged alleys. Finally, after what felt like hours, we reached a small black door in the side of a steel-encased building. He pulled a set of keys out of his pocket, which I certainly found strange. Why did Michael, the esteemed Archangel, have a set of keys that opened a doorway in hell? But, as curious as I was, now was not the time to ask. The footsteps were growing louder. They would round the corner at any moment, and the demon army would find all of us standing there like idiots in the middle of the alley.
My father pushed us inside and slammed the door behind us. He held a finger to his lips as the footsteps stormed by the door and then back again. Finally, the footsteps grew distant, and I could tell his form visibly relaxed. It was interesting. His presence here and everything about it. He obviously came to this realm often enough that he had spies, and he had his own safe house with a set of keys. But he also hid from demons, which suggested that he wasn’t one hundred percent comfortable here.
I wanted to ask him about it. Hell, I wanted to pry, but he immediately disappeared through another door in the back of the room before I could say a single word.
The rest of us gazed around, uncertain of exactly what we should do. Should we follow him? Should we plop down on one of the sofas that were scattered around the room? The place was furnished. The couches looked similar to those found on earth. It occurred to me that they could even come from there, if that was even possible. There were also a few lamps, though there didn’t seem to be anywhere to plug them in. Did demons have electricity? Other than that, there were a couple of old rugs spread across the stone floor and a single table had been shoved into the corner. Mounds of papers were piled on top. I found myself drifting toward it until the door slammed open once again.
“Right, Erela, come with me. “My father glanced at me without a single ounce of affection in his eyes.
I raised an eyebrow. “Where am I going?”
“There isn’t enough time for questions. We must go now if you want to get out of here.”
I hesitated, gazing back at Ramiel, at Sam. “What about the others? We can’t just leave them here. I thought we were going back to the Lower Realm together.”
He waved his hand dismissively. “You must go one at a time. A large group of us will only catch the attention of the demon army.”
I slowly put one foot in front of the other, hating the idea of being separated from my Order. But my father’s words made sense. It would be a lot easier for two of us to slip through the buildings than the entirety of our group all at once.
My father was getting visibly impatient, so much so that he even tapped his foot. “Come on. The sooner I get you through, the sooner I can come back, get them, and take them through.”
That finally got me moving. I followed him out the door, which led to another alley that must have been on the opposite side of the building. He grabbed my arm in his hand and jerked me along, taking no care to avoid hurting me. But whatever. I was done caring. All I wanted was to get on the other side of the portal, so that my Order and I could figure out a way to defeat the demons on the other side. We still hadn’t figured out exactly what we were going to do or how we were going to do it, but getting out of hell was step one in whatever plan we came up with.
We rounded a corner, and the prickle of humanity morphed into a roar. The portal shimmered before us, blue and green flickering in strange waves between two buildings. Luckily, there were no demons standing between us and the Lower Realm. They must have still been running through the streets, looking for us.
When we reached the portal, I paused and turned toward my father, still conflicted about how I felt. Sure, I was incredibly pissed off at him for what he’d done. But that didn’t stop the fact that he was still my father. His grip on my arms tightened and he turned me so that my back was facing the portal, and then he leaned down to look into my eyes. This was it, I thought. The moment he would apologize. The moment he would explain with good reason why he’d treated me the way he had.
“I know you want to know why I took you to Celestia when you were born.” He ground his teeth together, the muscles in his jaw rippling as he spoke. “The truth is, Erela, it was the only way to keep your demon powers hidden. As long as you were in Celestia, they would be muted. You would have never known, nor would anyone else. Going to the Lower Realm meant that your powers might come out, but only just. Never fully. Of course, you had to take it a step too far. Now that you have been to hell, the full strength of your powers is open to you. Unless you return to Celestia, you will never be able to hide what you are. And if you cannot hide what you are, the Archangels will kill us both.”
And then, for the second time that day, I was pushed through
a portal.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Erela
I cracked open my eyes. At some point, I had passed out. Groaning, I pushed up onto my elbows and glanced around. I was in my bed. And by my bed, I mean, my bed in Celestia. My old bed in my old home in Michael’s house. Well, one of Michael’s houses. This wasn’t his only one, and he certainly didn’t live here. Only me and my babysitters.
Laura had always been my closest nanny. When I hadn’t been studying at the Academy, she had taken care of me every step of the way. She had raised me, far more than my father ever had. And now she was standing by the bed, staring down at me with a strange mixture of sadness and happiness screwing up her face. Laura had never joined any of the Orders, but she looked as though she would’ve belonged. She was muscular and strong, and she wore her blonde hair up in a tight ponytail, so that it never got into her face when she worked. She always wore a trim set of black shirt and black pants. No nonsense.
“Welcome home, Erela.” Her voice was soft, much softer than I’d ever heard it before. “I thought I’d never see you again.”
I shook my head, confusing rippling through me as memories began to rush through my mind. What exactly was going on? I was back in Celestia, so my father hadn’t merely sent me through the portal. He’d sent me home. No, this wasn’t my home. My home was down in Lower Realm with the fallen angels who had taken me under their wings, who had opened their hearts to me, who had shown me who I really was.
I didn’t belong here anymore.
And now my father’s words echoed in my ears. He’d only taken me to Celestia to keep me a secret. To hide my powers, which was why he’d sent me back here instead of back to earth. He was trying to hide me again, to keep his secret safe. Not to keep me safe. He was just trying to save his own damn neck. Tears burned my eyes as I gazed up at Laura. I didn’t want to take this out on her, but how much did she really know? Did she know that Michael’s daughter was part fire demon? And was she going to try to cover it up for him again?
Nebulous (Order of the Fallen Book 2) Page 13