“Hello?” a female voice that was not her girlfriend’s voice answered.
“Keira?” she asked, knowing the answer already, but not knowing what else to say.
“No, honey. It’s Miriam. She left her phone in the kitchen,” she replied.
“Oh, hi there,” Emma greeted, suddenly a little nervous.
“Let me get her for you,” Miriam said. “Well, now that I have you, actually, can I talk to you for a minute, Emma?”
“Oh, sure,” she answered reluctantly.
“Emma, I know you know Keira isn’t doing well financially and with the business.”
“Yeah, I am.” Emma moved out of the way of a Lexus that was trying to park.
“She’s losing her apartment soon. She’s considering staying with some friends until she can find another place.”
“She is?”
“You didn’t know?”
“She said she was going to find something she could afford.”
“I’m not comfortable with my daughter staying on someone’s couch when there’s a perfectly good bed in this house for her. We can get her a job right away. She could save up to start the business again if she wanted to or get her own place again.”
“I can understand that.”
“I was hoping that maybe you could help me convince her to move back home. Temporarily, of course. I know you two only just started dating, but I think you can see that this is the smart decision for Keira. She would live here rent-free, and–”
“You want me to convince my girlfriend to move over four hundred miles away?”
“I want my daughter to be taken care of; to be safe,” Miriam replied.
“I want that too, but I don’t know why she has to be in LA to do that, Mrs. Worthy.”
“She could live in an unsafe neighborhood up there or on someone’s couch. Down here, she’d be with her parents in a safe neighborhood. She could even consider starting her business up again down here,” Miriam said. Emma held in her response. She was frustrated, and she didn’t want to show that to her girlfriend’s mother. They’d only just met. This wasn’t the time to make a bad impression. “She was successful down here before she moved to San Francisco.”
“You want her to stay? If she rebuilds her business here, she’d be staying permanently.”
“She’s already considering staying with us to save up some money. It makes sense.”
“She’s considering staying here?”
“It sounds like you two have some things to talk about. I’m not trying to interfere. I hoped you and I both wanted the same thing: Keira safe and happy.”
“I do want that.” Emma decided not to add that she wanted Keira to be safe and happy with her.
“Good. I think we’re on the same page. Let me get Keira for you.”
“No,” Emma said it before she even thought about it. “I actually just called to tell her I can’t make dinner,” Emma lied. “I have a meeting, and I was invited to drinks and dinner with some of the people here. I can’t skip it, unfortunately. She should probably just have dinner with you guys tonight.”
“Oh, that’s great. We’re about to visit her aunt. I know she’d like to spend more time with her,” she replied.
“I’m glad it worked out this way then.” Emma glanced back at the hotel behind her. “I should be getting back.”
Keira was considering moving to Los Angeles. Emma had only just gotten to San Francisco. There was no way she could move with her. Even if she could, it was too soon to move to a different city just because Keira was moving there. Maybe after a year or so, she could look into jobs in LA and not ruffle any feathers at her current job. Of course, by then, Keira might be back in San Francisco, trying at her business again. Maybe LA was only temporary for her and just for a few months. Maybe by then they could just move in together and save money that way. Emma felt suddenly dizzy as she walked back into the convention hall. She loved this woman. She wanted to be with her. But Keira seemed incapable of talking to her about the important stuff, like how bad her finances really were or where she was planning to live.
CHAPTER 34
It was after eight when Keira was finally able to get away from her aunt, uncle, and two cousins, including Spencer, who wouldn’t shut up about his gym. She’d texted Emma earlier after her mom had explained she’d have to miss their dinner, but she hadn’t heard back. She hadn’t expected to though. If Emma was that busy, it was probably too difficult for her to get away. She made her way out to the car, giving her parents a chance to say goodnight to the family and her a chance to try to call Emma and find out if she was back in the room yet. The phone rang and rang. And, eventually, Keira left a voicemail. Her parents came outside. They drove back to their house with Keira feeling moderately happy. It had been fun visiting with her family. She’d missed them all. She hadn’t been home in a while, and despite some of the more annoying moments that always happen when she caught up with her family, it was a pleasant evening. She missed her girlfriend though. She’d wanted one night with Emma in LA before they had to leave. She’d wanted to go to dinner and then maybe walk to the beach or even just around the city.
“I’m going to head back to the hotel,” Keira explained the moment the car parked in her parents’ driveway.
“Honey, it’s late. You should just stay here for the night and drive back tomorrow morning,” her dad suggested.
“Dad, it’s not that late. And I want to see Emma. She’s been working all day. I should be there.”
“Alright, I guess we understand.” He winked at her through the rearview mirror.
◆◆◆
“Babe?” Keira greeted after swiping her card key in the door and opening it.
The lights were out. She looked to her right to see that, through the light from the hall, Emma was already asleep and tucked into bed. She smiled at the sight, even though Emma was facing away from her, and moved slowly and silently toward the bathroom. She’d known Emma’s day had been incredibly long and didn’t fault her for falling asleep or not calling her back. She finished getting ready for bed, deciding she’d shower in the morning, and climbed into bed next to Emma. She wanted to kiss her before falling asleep but didn’t want to wake her. So, instead, she scrolled through some emails on her phone until she finally felt tired enough to go to sleep.
◆◆◆
When Emma woke the next morning, she found Keira still asleep next to her. She’d gone to dinner the night before with a few people from the convention and had a few too many drinks. She’d returned to the room early, knowing she’d reached her limit, and crashed onto the bed. She’d fallen asleep moments after with the thought of Keira remaining in LA while she returned to San Francisco. Rationally, she knew that wouldn’t happen. Keira had an apartment, and things, and friends up there she’d need to take care of before she could just move back to LA. Obviously, they’d have a conversation about that before the actual move and if they’d do the long-distance thing. Emma hated the long-distance thing. In Emma’s mind, she’d failed at long-distance with Hailey. She’d loved Hailey beyond words at the time.
Keira was that person for her now. She knew it. She could feel it in her gut that she and Keira were supposed to be together in that familiar way she’d sensed with Hailey, but this time she was older. She had more life experience, more relationship experience, and she knew herself better than when she was nineteen. That was fortunate for Emma because she trusted herself more than she once did.
An hour-long flight to LA seemed easy. It could be done. Certainly, other people made things work when they lived far apart. Emma couldn’t picture that though. She couldn’t imagine seeing Keira only once a month for a weekend. What people didn’t consider was the fact that the one-hour flight didn’t include the two hours at the airport prior to that, and the traffic to get to the airport. It didn’t include that flights were only available at certain times, and that it would cost money with each flight, cab to the airport, or parking the car there
. Most importantly to Emma, though, was the time it would take. If she finished work on Friday afternoon, she could reasonably get to the airport by seven. Her flight would be late. She’d be in Keira’s arms even later. She’d be exhausted. They likely both would be. They’d return to Keira’s parents’ house. Could Emma stay in Keira’s bedroom there? It wasn’t exactly built for two women. Maybe they’d get a hotel for the weekend, but that would cost three hundred for a couple of nights. They’d only have to say goodbye again on Sunday afternoon. They’d have just over twenty-four hours once a month.
She loved Keira. She wanted to be with her more than anything. But if Keira was thinking of moving to LA because it was right for her right now, Emma wouldn’t stop her. Keira had to take care of herself. Emma understood that. She respected that. However, doing the long-distance thing was hard, and Emma wasn’t sure she’d be able to do it. Maybe the best thing would be to consider their options while Keira remained in LA. Of course, to Emma, the worst part of this wasn’t the fact that they might be embarking on a long-distance relationship. It was the fact that Keira hadn’t spoken to her about it. She was considering it. She’d spoken to her parents. But they’d already had this issue where Keira hadn’t talked to her. They’d made a deal.
“Good morning,” Keira whispered.
“Morning,” Emma supplied.
“You were asleep when I got back.”
“I know. Sorry, I was exhausted.”
“It’s okay.” Keira rolled on her side to face Emma. “How’d you sleep?”
“Okay. I didn’t take a shower last night, so I’m going to hop in now.”
“Can I join you?” Keira wiggled her eyebrows.
“Better not. I have a meeting I have to get to. Then, we’re heading for the airport.” She climbed out of bed without kissing Keira good morning. “I’ll get ready, and then you can go in, okay?”
“Okay.” Keira’s tone made Emma more than aware that Keira knew something was going on, but Emma didn’t have time to have the conversation now.
◆◆◆
“How was your meeting?” Keira asked Emma the moment the woman returned to the hotel room.
“Fine. Are you packed?”
“Yeah, I packed your stuff too,” Keira announced while Emma moved to grab at her roller bag. “Emma, what’s wrong?”
“Are you moving to LA?” Emma blurted out.
“What?” Keira stood from the desk chair to meet Emma’s height.
“Your mom said–”
“My mom told you I was moving down here?”
“She said you were considering it,” Emma returned.
Keira sighed deeply and replied, “Em, I told her that because that was what she wanted to hear. She’s concerned and thought me living with them for a while would help.”
“So, you aren’t considering it?”
Keira could tell Emma was frustrated and holding it back. She took a step toward her.
“I’m only considering it like I’m considering every option,” Keira tried to explain. “I have to include all my options, Emma.”
“Key, you’d really move down here?”
“If I did, it would be temporary. That is a big if, Em. I’m still trying to figure everything out.” She placed her hand on top of Emma’s, still clutching her bag.
“You’d rather move back with your parents than live with me?” Emma’s frustration had disappeared in an instant, and now Keira was met with a mix of sadness and concern.
“What? No. You know that. We’ve talked about this. Me moving in with you would only be because of my financial situation. That’s not how I want to start off with us.”
“And I understand, Keira. But if you’re going to move away, what’s the point?” Emma shot back. “You’d be here. I’d be there. We’d see each other when we could, but we’re both not exactly rich, so we can’t afford to fly back and forth all the time, and–”
“Emma, it’s one of the options.” Keira squeezed her hand. “I haven’t made a decision.”
“But why did I have to hear about it from your mom? Why couldn’t you have told me that you were thinking about doing this?”
“Because it’s the last resort.” Keira removed her hand, tired of trying to console Emma. “It’s literally the last thing I want to do, but I might not have a choice.”
“I’m giving you a choice,” Emma retorted.
“Emma, I’m probably not moving here. Why are we even talking about this? I told my mom I’d find a place up there, and if I couldn’t, I’d stay with Greene or Hill until I could work it out. I’d stay with you some nights and–”
“You’d rather bounce from friend to friend than just live with me?”
“Emma, why are we back here? We’ve talked about this. We’ve known each other, what, like two months? You’re really ready to live together full-time after two months?”
“Yes. Why is that such a big deal? I know a lot of couples that moved in together that quickly.”
“You told me you were asking because I needed a place to live. Now, you’re ready for the full-on commitment of living with your girlfriend regardless of my money situation?”
“Yes,” Emma repeated with force this time.
“Well, this is news to me, Em.”
“You thinking of moving to LA is news to me. We’re on different flights today. Let’s just get to the airport and take the time to get some–”
“What? Space?” Keira folded her arms over her chest.
“I was going to say time to decompress,” Emma answered. “You want space?”
“I want a girlfriend that understands that these are difficult decisions I have to make, and they’re not about her,” Keira revealed in a harsh tone she hadn’t meant to let slip out.
“Wow!” Emma crossed her own arms over her chest.
“Wait, Em. That’s not–”
“No, it is. It’s exactly what you meant. I’m sorry I want to know where my girlfriend is going to be living next month; that she actually loves me enough to want to live with me.”
“You don’t think I love you enough?” Keira dropped her arms to her sides. “Em–”
“I don’t want to talk about this here. I’m tired. It’s been a long week at a conference I wasn’t even supposed to come to, and I just want to go home.” She pulled on her bag again.
“And then what? Not talk about it on the drive? Go our separate ways after we get back?” Keira asked.
“I don’t know. Maybe.” Emma’s pulled open the hotel room door. “We’re not going to settle this right now. We have to check out soon anyway.” She held open the door. “I don’t want to fight though, Keira.”
“Neither do I,” Keira sighed out.
“Then, let’s just go.”
“It’s not resolved, Em.”
“I don’t know how to resolve it though, Keira. You say it’s about you and that you need to figure things out. Fine. Figure them out.”
Keira only shook her head sideways as she dragged her suitcase out of the hotel room, silently following Emma toward the elevator.
◆◆◆
Emma hated herself. She absolutely hated how she’d reacted to Keira’s circumstances. She understood logically that what Keira was asking for wasn’t much. She needed some time. She needed to make the decision that was best for herself. Emma recognized that she’d feel the same way if the shoe was on the other foot. But as she sat in the airport lounge, waiting for Keira’s flight to land, she couldn’t seem to find it in herself to explain that to her girlfriend and apologize for how she’d been acting.
Emma had kept her face pressed to the window the entire flight, fearing she might cry, as the memories of their heated conversation earlier as well as the one with Keira’s mom continued to replay in her mind. When she got off the plane, she considered leaving and texting Keira that she felt like she needed some time to herself, but she waited and watched the monitor. Keira’s plane had just landed. Emma’s heart rate sped up at the thoug
ht of seeing Keira and the awkwardness that had come over their relationship so quickly. The truth was that Emma didn’t have an answer that would make everything better.
She’d been a fast mover in relationships in the past. She wasn’t sure that was something she could just change about herself. She wanted Keira around all the time and wanted to continue to build their relationship. If Keira needed time, she could give her that. It wasn’t the fact that Keira wasn’t ready to move in with her that bothered Emma. It was that Keira thought that she should sleep on couches or move to LA instead of just accepting that they loved one another. Emma was ready and willing to offer her place either temporarily until Keira got a place of her own or even permanently, if things worked out for them. Keira wasn’t even willing to entertain that.
Emma sat forward a little as she watched passengers deplane. Her phone rang in her pocket, and she expected it to be Keira telling her she’d landed and that she was stuck at the back of the plane, but she saw Summer’s name appear instead.
“Hey, Sum.” She shifted her focus from the concerns about her relationship to her phone conversation.
“Hey, sorry to bug you.”
“You’re not bugging me,” Emma replied.
“Good. Listen, Lena and I have set a date and location for the wedding. I wanted to let you know since you’ll be traveling.”
“Yeah? That’s great. When? Where? Connecticut like her parents want?” Emma watched as a mother navigated with her small child through the crowd as the little girl attempted to pull her own ladybug-shaped carry-on bag with little luck.
“Yes and no, actually,” Summer answered.
“What does that mean?” Emma laughed.
“We’re going to need complete secrecy on this from all parties if it’s going to work, or Lena’s mom will never forgive us.”
San Francisco Series- Complete Edition Page 34