by R L Medina
I frowned. My thoughts darted back and forth. Was this about me? Me and my weirdness? Besides Mom, Grandmere was the only other person who knew about my paranoia, but what could she do?
“I don’t want to go.” My voice sounded small and weak. Pathetic.
Mom stood and walked over to me. She wrapped me in her arms, her vanilla and spice enveloping me. “It won’t be for too long. Everything will be waiting for you when we get back. School, work, friends.”
I scoffed at the last word. The only friend I had was miles away in California, forgetting me. A thought struck me. There was no coming back. Something big was happening. I could feel it in my bones. My life played out like a movie, and this was the part where it took a nasty turn and it wasn’t just my anxiety at work. No. There was a heaviness to this moment and whatever weird sixth sense I had was screaming at me—no coming back.
My heart pounded against my ribcage and my hands trembled. I squeezed my eyes shut and let Mom hold me until the tremors stopped. She pulled away and started packing up the rest of the brownies. I stood in the kitchen, watching her.
“Your suitcase is packed, but you might want to grab anything else you want.”
I glanced at the faded purple suitcase near the door, surprised to have missed it. How long had Mom been planning this trip? I pushed down the panic threatening to bubble up again. Deep breath. One step at a time. Heading for my room, I tried to tell myself I was being silly. It was just a trip to Grandmere’s, but that nagging feeling wouldn’t go away.
My room looked bare. Bed, dresser, closet. Everything in its place, but Mom had cleaned up my mess and packed all my belongings. The little trinkets and mementos that had made it mine. Old photos and flyers, candles, the little jewelry box Grandmere had bought me the previous year. My heart sank. This wasn’t a short a trip. We were leaving. Not coming back, the voice in my head whispered.
Mom’s shadow filled the doorway and I turned to shoot her an accusing look. She stared past me, eyes unfocused.
“There’s nothing left to pack,” I said quietly.
Ignoring me, she walked back to the kitchen. I gripped my unicorn charm as I followed her. How could we just leave like this? We grabbed our suitcases and when mom shut the door behind me, I didn’t look back. Tears threatened to break free. I blinked them away, not wanting to think of all the memories, or the things I was leaving behind.
Mom rolled her suitcase down easily with one hand and a big box in the other, but I struggled as mine tottered on its side with each step. We were leaving all the furniture, what little we had. It didn’t feel right. What would happen to our stuff? How could Mom just leave like this?
The sky had darkened as we loaded up the car. I shivered and grabbed my hoodie from the back before I got in. Mom climbed in after me and started up the car. Heat blasted, drowning the steady pounding of my heart. My stomach rumbled.
“Dinner? I packed sandwiches.” She tried to sound cheerful.
My stomach rumbled in response. I grudgingly took the PB&J sandwich she handed me.
I stared out the window as we made our way out of the city. Mom played her favorite CD of orchestral masterpieces. The familiar sounds of Chopin soothed my nerves as we ate in silence.
“One last stop,” Mom announced as she pulled into a gas station.
“Here. Get us some candy.”
My lips pursed as she handed me ten dollars. She smiled. I sighed and pulled my hood over my head as I left the car. Candy. As if that would make this impromptu road trip any better. My gut clenched as I waved away the dark thoughts.
The man at the counter glanced up at me as I walked in and turned back to his magazine. I made my way to the candy aisle and grabbed a bag of skittles.
“Good choice.” A soft, feminine voice startled me.
I looked up to see a purple haired girl grinning at me. She yanked a package of bubble gum down and threw it towards me.
Startled, I reached out and caught it before it fell.
She smiled, her dark eyes twinkling. “How old are you now?”
I blinked in confusion. Who was this girl and what did she want? Chills crawled up my spine. I couldn’t shake the feeling that we’d met before. More than once.
“Sorry? Have we met?”
She laughed. “Is it the hair? The clothes?”
I followed her sweeping hand down her purple hoodie dotted with skulls, black tights and giant combat boots. Her eyes narrowed and fear shot through me. Who was she? How did she know me?
“Hmm. Interesting. You should be able to see through the glamour by now.”
Her words pounded in my ears. Glamour? What did she mean?
My heart sped up as I tried to make sense of it. Something told me that the invisible shadows and hearing voices were only the beginning. The question was, the beginning of what?
She cocked her head and searched my face. “Take it easy, love. I didn’t mean to scare you. You’re clearly not ready. But you better steel yourself, Renée. Things are about to get real.”
With that she vanished into thin air. I jumped back, stifling a shout. My eyes raced across the aisle, looking for any sign of her. I gripped my charm bracelet and took a deep breath. Had I imagined her? What was happening to me?
“Renée? What’s taking so long?” Mom’s voice broke through my thoughts.
Concern etched into her features as she glanced around me.
“Sorry… I’m coming.”
I followed her to the counter to pay for our stuff. She stiffened as I placed the bubble gum down but said nothing. My mind raced. I hadn’t imagined it. Whatever was happening… it was real. A wave of panic rose, making my chest tighten. If I told her would she believe me? Or would she wave it away like she did with my stalkers?
Once back inside the car, I stared out the window. Mom drove in silence, leaving me alone with my dark thoughts. Things were not right. Something very real was wrong with me.
Soon mountains and forest replaced the city. My eyes grew heavy and my thoughts jumbled together as I fell asleep. Maybe it was all a dream. I’d wake up tomorrow in my own bed and there would be no more shadows. No talking animals. Things would be normal.
Hands ran along my face. Little hands. Poking and pulling. Fear seized me. My eyes flew open.
“Renée? What is it?” Mom’s voice startled me.
I blinked and pulled the mirror down. My freckled face stared back at me, my brown eyes wide in fear. The dream felt so real. I could still feel the warm, little touches on my skin.
“Renée?”
The guttural ‘r’ of my name made me cringe. I turned to her and nodded. Only she and Grandmere called me by real name. Everyone else called me Ren. I preferred it that way. If I couldn’t be a normal girl, at least I could have a somewhat normal name that people could pronounce.
“Just a bad dream.”
Mom gave me a long look. Something caught my eye ahead. A shimmering figure lit up the night sky and fell to the middle of the road.
“Mom, watch out!”
The car veered sharply. My seatbelt dug into my shoulder. I closed my eyes, bracing for impact. We came to a sudden stop off the road, barely missing a tree.
Mom turned the car off and grabbed my hand. “Stay here.”
She tried to keep her voice steady, but I could hear the fear. It chilled me to the core. Mom wasn’t afraid of anything.
I gaped at her. “What are you doing?”
Without an answer, she undid her belt and opened the door. I reached for her, but she yanked out of my grasp. The door slammed behind her.
I wanted to follow her, but my body wouldn’t budge. Closing my eyes, I tried to calm my nerves. I’d seen movies like this before. This was the part where something horrific happened. I couldn’t let Mom get attacked. My fingers trembled and my mind screamed. Stay in the car and be safe. Mom would be fine, my thoughts lied to me. I shook them off. Don’t be a coward.
One. Two. Three.
I snapped off my s
eatbelt and forced myself to open my door and step out. Shivers crawled down my spine. I glanced around the moonlit road and walked around the front of the car, squinting to see Mom. Her shadowy figure grew further away. Whatever the shimmer was, it was gone. Cold air pierced through my hoodie. I held my breath as I scanned the deserted road. Only mountains and forest surrounded us. We were alone.
Mom moved toward me and I sighed in relief. A light flashed behind her. More appeared. Big ones and small ones. People made of white flame. I shut my eyes, trying to clear my head. When I opened them again, they were still there. Then the white faded, revealing unnatural shadowy forms. Their bodies were too hunched, too tall, or too warbled to be human. A silent scream echoed in my head as I watched Mom whip around to face them. Run! But I knew it was too late. They surrounded her, blocking her from my view.
A gun fired. I screamed, my voice shrill, echoing through the mountains. Wolves howled in reply. One of the monsters fell. Mom stood in the middle, gun drawn. When had she bought a gun? The shadows moved away from her as the howling grew closer. I glanced at the forest behind us. The metal of my unicorn charm dug into my hand. Dark shapes leapt from the trees. I bolted for the car.
Get Mom and get the hell out of here.
Throwing myself into the driver’s seat, I searched for the keys. Gone. They were gone. I slammed my hand down on the wheel, cursing.
Howls surrounded us, striking my nerves like a gong. Wolves. Perfectly normal wolves. Not grotesquely shaped monsters. But why would they come towards a gunshot? To hunt us? To help us? My mouth dropped open as I watched them attack the monsters. Unearthly screams erupted echoed by the snarls and yelps of the wolves. Bodies, both wolf and shadow alike, thrown around in the frenzy. I honked the horn, trying to get Mom’s attention. Where was she?
Bright flame flashed. The monsters were disappearing. Bodies lay motionless on the road. Fear coiled inside of me. I shoved it down as far as I could. Now was not the time to lose it. I opened the door and scurried out. I ran towards the fray, my eyes scanning for Mom. The remaining wolves stood by their fallen comrades, howling in sorrow. A battle lament for the fallen. How I understood it, I had no idea, but it was something I could puzzle over later. I had to find Mom.
As I moved closer, I realized the other two bodies were not wolves. I avoided them, not wanting to see their features close up. The road behind was still deserted. Had Mom fled into the woods? I shook my head. She would never leave me like that. What if she was injured?
“Mom?” My voice bounced off the trees. “Mom!”
“Hello, Princess,” a voice hissed behind me.
3
I spun around. A lean, black-clad figure stood eye to eye with me. Male, maybe, but definitely not human. His cat-like eyes glowed a bright yellow, his gaze sharp and penetrating. I glanced at the wolves. Would they protect me?
He followed my gaze and smiled. A horrible, sharp toothed smile. With a wave of his hand, the wolves retreated to the forest. I watched them go, my heart racing. Run. Run for the woods. But no matter how much I screamed at myself, my feet wouldn’t go.
He gave me a bow, pale hair, falling out of his hood. I backed up towards the car. Not that it mattered. It was too late to run now.
“Who are you?” My voice came out shaky and weak.
His eyes narrowed. “Don’t you mean what are you?”
I shuddered. No. I didn’t want to know what he was. His accent was the same as Mom’s and Grandmere’s and that terrified me the most. There was no way he was French. Worse was the feeling that I had met him before. He felt familiar.
All the odd things were finally making sense, but I didn’t want to face them. I just wanted to open my eyes and wake up from this nightmare. I clenched my eyes shut, trying to keep the tears at bay. Pathetic. Mom would be ashamed. Mom. What if she was out there wounded, waiting for me to find her?
“It’s time to go.” His chilly voice broke my thoughts.
I blinked. “Go?”
He gestured to the car. I stared at him. What was he talking about?
“You’re not going to kill me?” I asked, stupidly.
In one breath, he was in front of me, a knife pulled out of nowhere. The blade poised over my pounding heart.
“I could if you like.”
A roaring filled my ears and my body went numb. I don’t know how long I stood there or what he said next. My next conscious thought was how cold his hand was when he grabbed me. I could have fought back or at least tried to run, but no. Instead I let him lead me towards the car like the coward I was. But Mom was still out there.
“No.”
He paused and gave me a curious look. “No?”
“We can’t leave without my mom.”
He rolled his creepy yellow eyes. “She’s not coming back.”
My chest tightened. I shook my head, trying to keep myself calm. No coming back. Is that what those dark thoughts had meant? Had my subconscious known this was going to happen? And that girl in the gas station… she’d known.
“We have to leave now.”
I closed my eyes, gripping my charm with a trembling hand. No. No. No. The ground swayed beneath my feet. In the distance, wolves howled their misery. A full moon and a blanket of stars flashed in my view.
Then darkness.
Early morning rays greeted me as I woke. Memories fluttered through my mind. The shadows. Mom. The strange man. I bolted upright and searched my surroundings. An old cuckoo clock stared back at me. Grandmere’s house. I was in the room Mom and I had shared so many times.
Throwing off the heavy faded quilt, I swung my legs off the bed. The cold wooden floor bit through my socks. I glanced down at the jeans, long sleeve shirt, and hoodie I’d worn the day before. Why couldn’t I remember arriving? Guilt filled me. What kind of person sleeps like a baby when their mom is kidnapped by monsters? Had it all been a nightmare?
My gaze snagged on my purple suitcase, sitting next to Mom’s gray one in the corner of the room by the closet. The closet door stood ajar, and I spotted my clothes hanging up. Grandmere. She would give me answers.
The door opened.
“Renée,” Grandmere’s raspy voice called. Her tall, bony frame enveloped me, waves of coarse curls tickling my arms. I hugged her tightly, breathing in the familiar scent of lemon and pine.
“Grandmere! Where is Mom?”
She held me at a distance, dark eyes searching my face. I couldn’t read the stony expression on hers. Not surprise though. A cold panic washed over me. Was it real then? Mom was gone. Tears sprang up at the thought. Grandmere took a handkerchief from her dress pocket and wiped my face. She was still as beautiful as ever, her dark skin wrinkled with age. So different from Mom’s, but gorgeous just the same.
“There’s much to discuss. Clean yourself up and come down for breakfast. We’ll talk then.”
Without another word, she moved to the door, her long, flowing dress trailing behind her. She moved with all the grace of a ballerina. I took a deep breath as she closed the door.
My hands shook as I went to the closet for clean clothes. Moving as if in a trance. Even the lukewarm shower couldn’t snap me out of it. By the time I was dressed in some clean jeans and a cable-knit sweater, it felt like an eternity had passed. Nothing made sense anymore. Or if I wanted to be honest with myself, things were finally starting to make sense. The shadows that stalked me. That feeling of not belonging or not belonging where I was.
Part of me wanted those answers, but the other part of me—the bigger part of me—was terrified that once I faced the truth, I would never be the same. All I wanted was to be normal, but that dream was slipping further and further away. Where would the truth take me? Who was I, really? Was I even human? That question terrified me the most.
Voices drifted from the kitchen, dragging me out of my dark thoughts. Grandmere and the stranger from the night before. I paused by the door. Their voices were hushed, but urgent. Dread rolled inside of me like a wave ready to crash.
I wasn’t ready to face them. To face what came next.
Shaking my head, I opened the door and entered the hall. The little cabin fell silent as I peered over the wooden railing. The smell of eggs cooking, and fresh herbs made my mouth water. Below me, the first floor looked unchanged from last year or any year, really.
The same old, red suede couch stood in the middle, looking much too fancy in the rustic sitting room. Grandmere lived simply. She spent more time outdoors than indoors, and her home always looked so bare to me. Incomplete. There were no pictures, nothing that hinted at her earthy personality. It always felt like I had stepped into the past when I visited. Grandmere didn’t use anything modern and besides the few store-bought items like cookware and sewing materials, she lived off her land. Independent.
I braced myself as I entered the kitchen. Grandmere stood by the sink, washing and drying plates. Her hands moved so elegantly, like she was conducting an orchestra. Our visitor sat, straight backed at the table, watching me from behind his tea cup. I blinked. His face was thin and gaunt, and his white hair spilled down past his back. What a strange sight to see. This beastly creature at my grandmere’s table, drinking tea. He set it down and gave me a knowing smirk. The weird sense of déjà vu hit me. As much as I wanted to, I couldn’t shake off the feeling of familiarity.
“Do you need help, Grandmere?”
I gave the table a wide berth, trying to ignore the strange yellow eyes that watched me. A jolt of realization went through me. He was one of my shadows. Before I fell into panic mode, Grandmere handed me the plates and motioned me to the table. I followed her lead and sat across from my stalker, in mom’s seat, I realized with a stab of pain. His eyes watched me carefully as I rubbed my charm for comfort.
Grandmere took her place at the end of the small table. She pushed the steaming bowl of scrambled eggs toward us and waited for us to fill our plates before she served herself. I studied her as I turned the eggs over on my fork. Her eyes met mine and what I saw in them scared me. Fear. Grandmere didn’t scare easily, but I could see it plain as day. Mute terror behind her stony façade.