The women finished eating, talking a little about San Diego, and Taryn only shared a few small details about her own life. After cleaning up, she went home to let Clarissa get ready for her evening class. She was surprised when her friend knocked on her front door not even thirty minutes later, but it turned out her computer had frozen up and she needed help.
A few minutes later, Taryn sat in Clarissa’s makeshift office, watching as she rebooted her laptop. “I’m so sorry for running back over to get you,” Clarissa said, sifting through her papers as they waited. “It totally froze up when I tried to display the slides, and now I can’t even get back online.”
“Trust me, it happens all the time in my online classes,” Taryn assured her. “After your laptop reboots, I’ll show you how to share your screen with the students. They’ll see the slides and be able to continue following while you talk.”
“Geez, I can’t believe how frazzled I am over this,” Clarissa said, impatiently tapping her fingers.
“Could you teach out here?” Taryn asked. “Maybe you could find a similar position at a university here in California so you could lecture in person again.”
“I’m hoping to eventually find something. I haven’t even looked into it yet. I wasn’t ready to up and leave my job before, but now that Blake and I are engaged, things are different. We’ll be here permanently, or at least until the Navy transfers him.”
“Hmmm,” Taryn said, frowning.
“What’s wrong?”
“Oh, nothing. Just thinking.”
Clarissa chuckled. “You’re opposed to marriage? Or to marrying a Navy guy?”
Taryn shifted, looking at her neighbor. God, the last thing she wanted to do was admit she’d been married. And clearly Blake was nothing like her abusive ex. Clarissa was a smart, intelligent woman. She’d probably never understand how Taryn had ended up marrying an abuser. “Neither. I just can’t imagine feeling settled like that—willingly giving up your career and home. You seem so happy.”
“I am. And honestly, I wasn’t that connected to things in Texas. I didn’t have close friends or family there. I’m still teaching, just differently than before. It’ll happen for you someday,” Clarissa said. “You’re young. You’ll date, find a nice guy, eventually settle down….”
“Oh, it looks like your computer’s back up,” Taryn said, happy to change the subject. She watched as Clarissa logged in and clicked back to the link for her online class.
“Thank goodness it’s working. Just show me how to display the slideshow, and I’ll get back to my lecture. Somehow that’s what messed me up earlier. I hope the students are still there.”
“They will be,” Taryn assured her. “It hasn’t really been that long since you ran over to get me. Everyone has technical problems at some point with remote learning.”
Taryn stepped off to the side so she wouldn’t appear on camera, then pointed to where Clarissa needed to click. Mouthing “thank you” to her as the slides popped up on the screen, Clarissa apologized to the class and then continued on with the lecture.
Taryn silently slipped out the office door, leaving it cracked. It was only eight at night but already growing dark. The days were getting shorter this time of year, and she wondered what winters on the west coast would be like. She’d moved here without thought or research. And who was she kidding? She hadn’t just moved. She’d run.
One small suitcase was all she’d brought with her, along with the cash she’d stashed when she’d still been married to Austin. She had her purse and her laptop, but that was basically it.
Taryn heard a car door shut outside and figured Blake had just gotten home. She nearly tripped over her own two feet as she saw both him and Jackson coming in the front door. Both men still had their fatigues on, and she tried to keep her jaw from dropping when Jackson’s dark brown gaze locked with hers.
“Hey Taryn,” Blake said. “I thought Clarissa had a lecture tonight.”
“She does,” Taryn said, flushing as she walked downstairs to the main level of the townhouse. Jackson’s eyes were boring into her, and even though she had on jeans and a tank top, she felt practically naked with the way his gaze raked over her. It was possessive and somewhat protective all the same—like she was his to watch over.
Her pulse pounded, and she tried not to let her nerves get the best of her. She wasn’t scared of Jackson. She was attracted to him. It was a little bit mind-boggling to feel attracted to a man again. She thought Austin had turned her off to dating and marriage forever. And it’s not like she planned to marry Jackson. Goodness. She wouldn’t even date him.
She just felt safe and somewhat flustered by the fact that he was here.
She nodded hello to him but continued talking. “Clarissa got kicked off her meeting and couldn’t figure out how to stream her slides. She just ran next door to get me since I take online classes. Luckily I was able to help her.”
“She’s all set now?” Blake asked, frowning.
“Yep. I was just going to let myself out.”
The two men exchanged a glance. “I’ll walk you back,” Jackson said, his voice gruff.
“Oh, uh, thanks.”
“Is there any food left?” Blake asked, dropping his gear to the ground. “We haven’t eaten yet, and I’m starving. We’ve been conducting training drills for hours.”
“There’s tons of food,” Taryn said. “Clarissa invited me over earlier for dinner.”
“She mentioned that. Jackson, I’ll look around for your cell phone. It’s bound to be here somewhere.”
“Appreciate it. I didn’t realize until I got home last night that I’d left it here.” He gestured for Taryn to go ahead, and then they were both walking out of Blake’s front door. A sense of déjà vu washed over her. They’d just done this exact thing last night. Except now Jackson was in his fatigues, looking gruff and sexy beside her. She didn’t know what kind of drills they’d been doing all day, but it seemed like he’d just showered on base and put on a clean camo uniform. He smelled of clean soap, and with his large presence at her side, she didn’t feel as jumpy as she usually did if she went outside at night.
Taryn almost wished her ex was in fact here to see her with Jackson at her side. She felt invincible beside him. He’d protect her if Austin ever showed up. Goodness. Austin probably wouldn’t dare even show his face if Jackson was around. He liked tormenting her, but a man as big as Jackson? Austin would probably cower in the corner rather than come to blows with him.
Her skin prickled with awareness as Jackson shifted closer to her when a car passed by. It didn’t even slow down, but she realized he was remembering her reaction from last night and trying to make her feel safe.
Her heart fluttered.
Jackson was a big, tough guy, but he seemed chivalrous, too. Without her even asking, he was watching out for her. He’d offered to walk her back. He was ready to protect her from danger.
She felt a little silly being so nervous all the time, but it wasn’t from anything he’d said or done. Jackson didn’t make a big deal about it. He just seemed to have a natural protective instinct.
“I think I can fix your trashcan,” Jackson said, looking at it sitting up by her garage. It had been relatively easy for her to pull it back up the driveway that morning when it was empty. “I’ll pick up an extra wheel next time I’m at the home improvement store. I need to get a few things for my place.”
“Do you have a house?”
“No, just an apartment. I’ve got to put up some shelving though, so I’m planning to swing by the store when I get a day off.”
“I should’ve left some lights on,” Taryn said with a frown as they walked up her front steps. The porch light was on, but her house was completely dark. She’d rushed over to help Clarissa get back online for her class without even thinking about the lights. And now the sun had set, and she’d be entering her dark house alone.
“I’ll go in with you,” Jackson said, seeming to sense her unease.
<
br /> She didn’t comment, just unlocked the front door. Jackson moved in ahead of her to switch on the foyer light, and she realized with disdain that she still hadn’t changed the bulb.
“It needs a new lightbulb.”
“Do you have any? I’m tall enough to reach the light fixture without a ladder if I stand on the stairs. I can change it for you while I’m here.”
“Yeah, thanks. I’ll go grab one from the kitchen.”
She had a new package of lightbulbs on the counter and cringed as Jackson led the way upstairs. She knew he was walking ahead of her because it was dark, but she didn’t want him looking around her kitchen, realizing she barely had anything in it. She hardly had any furnishings or belongings at all. And she knew he took in everything as he flipped on another light and his gaze swept her living room.
“You keep the place clean,” he commented as he turned toward the kitchen and flipped on another light.
“I don’t have much,” she said softly. Her laptop sat there on the kitchen table where she’d left it earlier, but she didn’t have decorations or knick-knacks lying around. She didn’t have pictures on her walls. Goodness. She didn’t even have dirty dishes piled up. She barely had enough food to eat. “I bought some new lightbulbs last week,” she said, gesturing toward the counter.
Embarrassment washed over her. Her nearly empty box of cereal was sitting there, along with the remains of her jar of peanut butter and a nearly empty sleeve of crackers. She hadn’t bothered putting them away. Her cupboards were equally bare.
Not that he’d go snooping through them.
“I’d offer you something to eat, but I haven’t gotten to the store yet.”
He raised his eyebrows.
She met his gaze and froze. She’d been trying to make light of the situation, but in that instant, it felt like he could see straight through her—right into her very soul. Did he know how scared she was half the time? How she was barely keeping it together?
Had Jackson guessed that she hadn’t gone to the grocery store yet because she was down to her last few dollars? Or did he think she’d just been busy?
“Uh, I’m planning to go tomorrow.”
He didn’t say anything for a moment but then grabbed the package on the counter. “I’ll go change your lightbulb.”
He disappeared, and Taryn let out a breath she hadn’t even realized she’d been holding. Although he hadn’t said anything, he clearly realized she didn’t have much. An old sofa sat in her living room along with an inexpensive coffee table, but she didn’t have a TV. She didn’t have anything in her dining room. She’d gotten the small wooden table in her kitchen along with the matching chairs off a yard sale site. They were decent enough but clearly not brand new.
She had absolutely nothing in her basement.
Jackson appeared a moment later, holding the burned-out lightbulb. “All fixed.”
“Thanks.”
A beat passed, but Jackson didn’t move from her kitchen. She wasn’t sure what to do or even what to say. She hadn’t invited anyone inside before, but Jackson clearly saw everything. He’d seen enough last night when she’d frozen in fear, whether she’d meant to reveal anything to him or not.
Now he saw her practically empty kitchen. Her sparse furnishings. The nicest thing she had was her laptop. She didn’t dare admit to him that she’d been using the neighbor’s wifi. She had to pay her own electricity and water bills. She didn’t have a phone. She didn’t have cable.
Jackson was competent and capable. He probably didn’t know what to make of her situation, but it clearly bothered him.
“Listen, I know you just moved here without much,” he said in a low voice. He set the burned-out lightbulb down on her table, and her gaze focused on his muscular hands. He was calm and collected, and she felt like she was about to fall apart. “You’re still getting settled, and last night you admitted that you were scared of your ex-husband. You came here without anything, right?”
“I’ll be okay,” she said, her voice only wavering slightly. She swallowed, and she swore his face softened. Jackson, this big, tough Navy SEAL, who could probably kill a man with his bare hands, was trying to be gentle with her.
“You will be, but I’d like to help you out.” He held up a hand as she started to protest. “I know you already ate dinner with Clarissa, so I can’t very well take you out for a meal. Let me buy you some groceries for the week—just to help you get on your feet. You’ve been here a month or so, right? I’m sure you have bills and your rent to pay. Let me help you get started out on the right foot.”
“Jackson, I couldn’t let you do that,” she said softly. “You can’t pay for my groceries.”
He shrugged. “I could offer to take you out to a nice dinner Friday night. We could go to a fancy steakhouse and easily spend what a week’s worth of groceries cost. You wouldn’t object to that, right? Just my doing this for you even if it costs the same amount?”
“Well…that’s different.”
“It is, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to do it. Hell, I’d love to take you out to a nice dinner if I thought you’d ever agree to it.”
“I don’t date. I can’t,” she hastily added.
“I know, and I respect that. I can see that you’re still scared of your ex, and I swear that I’d never hurt you. Taryn, I’d never lay a hand on you,” he said, his eyes wide with sincerity as he looked at her. “I can’t just stand by and let you starve though.”
“I’m not starving,” she said, her cheeks pinkening. “I just invoiced my client today and should get paid tomorrow.”
“Should. I’ve got a steady paycheck thanks to the U.S. Navy. I’ve got money saved up. Hell, I get hazard duty pay for all my deployments to dangerous countries around the world. I can afford to buy you groceries for the week, sweetheart. Save the money you’ll get from your client for an emergency. Please.”
“Jackson,” she said, her eyes watering.
“Taryn,” he countered, his voice gruff. Her name on his lips did funny things to her insides. It was deep and commanding but comforting all the same. He was standing across the kitchen in his fatigues like a real-life G.I. Joe or something. He’d fight the bad guys and slay all her demons if she wanted. She couldn’t let him do that for her though. Not when she had nothing to offer him in return.
A few tears slid down her cheeks, and she hastily wiped them away. She’d been trying so hard for the past month to survive. To get by with what little she had. Her neighbors hadn’t seemed to notice she was struggling. How had Jackson, a man she’d just met, seen right through her?
“I didn’t mean to make you cry,” he said huskily.
“I just don’t feel right about taking money from you.”
“Then let me go pick up some groceries for you. I won’t show you the receipt. It would help if you told me what you like though. Do you have any food in your fridge at all?” he asked.
“Just a few things,” she whispered.
He nodded as if he’d suspected that all along.
Someone knocking on her front door had her jumping in fright. Jackson clenched his jaw, clearly not liking her reaction, but he attempted to soothe her. “That’s probably Raptor. I left my cell phone at his place last night. I’ll be right back.”
She nodded, swiping away the tears on her cheeks. She didn’t like the fact that Jackson had to go answer her door, but what was she supposed to do? She didn’t want Blake to see her standing there crying. She was afraid to answer the door alone anyway. She heard male voices talking, and then Jackson was closing her front door and coming back up the stairs.
Oddly enough, she felt comfortable with him here. She was embarrassed about her lack of money, but a man his size could easily overpower her. Hurt her.
She hadn’t worried about that at all since he’d come inside. If anything, it was the opposite. She felt safer with him here. It was as if her topsy-turvy world had been righted. Just looking at him soothed something deep inside of he
r. She couldn’t even explain it if she tried.
“I got it,” he said, holding up his cell before pocketing it. “Raptor invited me over for some food, but I told him I was helping you out with a few things here.”
“Aren’t you hungry?” she asked.
His lips quirked. “Starving. How about I order a pizza? Then we’ll order groceries online for delivery. I’ll pay for it,” he insisted. “And I’ll set it up so if you need groceries again, you can order with my credit card.”
“Jackson,” she protested. “You can’t just pay for my food.”
“I can, and I will,” he said, his voice gruff. “And don’t worry—I don’t expect anything in return. I’ll admit that I’m attracted to you. Hell, I’d be a fool not to be, but I understand you’re not in a place to date right now or feel comfortable yet around another man.”
“I just—I’ve been so scared,” she said, a few more tears slipping down her cheeks. Helplessly, she swiped them away as she looked at him from across the room. “I ran from my ex-husband. Even though we were divorced by then, he was still following me. Waiting outside my apartment. Trying to hurt me. He won’t ever leave me alone!” she sobbed, the tears falling harder now.
Jackson remained still but looked at her intensely. “Can I hold you?” he asked.
Her breath caught. She could tell him no, and he’d respect that. Jackson was an honorable man—the exact opposite of her ex-husband. He’d never force her, and he sure the hell wouldn’t ever hit her or lock her in a room.
His arms represented safety, and at the moment, she craved that more than anything in the world.
She nodded, and then he crossed the kitchen toward her and pulled her into his muscular embrace. He was gentle, despite his strength, and she rested her head on his broad chest as the tears streamed down her cheeks. His camo fatigues were rough under her skin, but she wound her arms around him anyway, unwilling to let go. His muscular arms held her, and she felt safe for the first time in years.
SEAL's Honor (Alpha SEALs Coronado Book 3) Page 6