He hesitated before he said, "Until you can say yes, you're absolutely sure, I won't. I told you I wouldn't pressure you. You decide when the time is right, beautiful baby girl. Just remember I love you. I'll wait."
"Oh, Dax, I do love you. Goodnight, baby," she said.
"Sweet dreams, Angela. I'll call you in the morning."
When morning came, however, there was no call from Dax. In fact, she didn't hear from him for several days. She had just about resigned herself to the fact that maybe he'd changed his mind and given up on her. On Thursday, she was just walking into her apartment with an armful of groceries when he pulled up in front and jumped out of his truck.
He ran to her and took the groceries out of her arms. "Let me help you, Angela."
"Dax, what are you doing here?" she asked as she unlocked the door and let him in.
"I've been out of town since early Sunday morning. There was a problem on one of our construction sites up north. I would have called, but things were so crazy, I never seemed to get a chance. I'm sorry. I came by here as soon as I got back to town."
"I find it hard to believe you couldn't have sent a text or something."
He looked at her warily before replying, "I know excuses won't cut it with you, but the times I even had a signal on my cell, I was working. It couldn't be helped, and I'm sorry. Is there nothing I can do to make it up to you?"
"Stay for dinner?" she asked as she began putting away the groceries.
"That's it, stay for dinner?" he asked in a teasing tone.
"Dax, you don't have to answer to me. If you say you were working, I believe you. If you'd like to stay for dinner, I'll cook. It's as simple as that."
He walked over to her and pulled her into his embrace. As he gazed into her eyes, he said in a low voice, "Angela, I've missed you like crazy this week." Then he leaned down and kissed her.
As she pulled away slightly, she said, "I thought you might have been giving me the brush off, you know, after I put the brakes on the other night."
"I would never do that. If I didn't want to see you anymore, I'd be man enough to tell you, Angela. And that is definitely not the case."
"Is everything okay at the site now?" she asked as she turned to begin dinner preparations.
"For the time being, it is. I may have to go back up there, though."
"Pasta okay with you?" she asked.
"It is, but why don't you let me take you out? You've worked all day. You don't have to cook for me."
"I really don't mind, Dax. I like to cook. Now sit down and watch me. I'll toss a salad and have this meal on the table in no time."
"I'm finding out more and more about Angela Vaccaro. You're not only pretty, funny, a pretty good card player, not to mention a great kisser, but you can cook, too."
"Now you're being silly," she said, grinning as she put water on to boil for the pasta. "This is an old family recipe for the sauce I'm going to prepare. It's very simple to make."
After dinner, they chose a Netflix movie and settled down together on her couch to watch it. When the movie ended, Dax stood up to go.
"Are you leaving so soon?" she asked.
"I think it's for the best, Angela. I don't want a replay of last weekend. I promised there would be no pressure, and I mean to stand by that. One of these days, though, we're going to have to have a chat about some things. There are things about me you don't know yet."
Angela looked down. When she looked up again, she met his gaze and replied, "I'm sorry, Dax. I'm just not ready for that kind of casual relationship, with you or anyone. I've told you I'm ready for the real thing. You're not, and you may never be. We're kind of at a stalemate here."
"And you won't sleep with me until you think I'm ready for the whole committed relationship, right?" he asked wryly. "What more can I say to get you to believe that I've changed my ideas on that subject? I'm not seeing anyone else, nor do I have any plans in that direction."
"No, Dax, I won't sleep with you until I can be sure you're not just playing with my emotions. I can't deny that I want it, too. But that's just not me. I'm not the casual-sex type of girl. And since that's not the kind of girl you're used to, I imagine eventually you'll move on. That's a chance I'll have to take. And what could you possibly tell me about yourself that I don't already know?"
"Angela, what makes you so sure I haven't changed my mind about what I want? I've told you repeatedly that I'm falling for you. I've taken you to meet my family. I've not pushed you, at least I've tried not to."
"Have you? Changed your mind?" she asked, breathlessly awaiting his reply.
"I-I'm not sure. I guess I'm like you in that respect. I know I enjoy your company. I think about you often. I've even told you I love you. I do love you, but am I ready to take the big plunge? I really can't say, Angela. Marriage is a big step. I would be a hypocrite if I jumped into it after what I said about Dane and Annie. On the other hand, for the first time ever, I can see it happening with you. I told you once that if I fell, it would be hard and fast. I think that's what's happening between us. I thought you knew that. I thought you knew how I felt. Was I wrong?"
"You have told me. And I really want to believe you. But it seems like you want the relationship with the possibility of more, and I want the promise of more before the relationship. Does that make any sense?"
He leaned down and kissed her. As he pulled away, he said, "Maybe we need to take a break and figure things out. All I know is I've never felt this way before. Whether it's headed for forever, I can't tell you."
With a tear in her eye, she replied, "Is that what you want, to take a break?"
"What I want is to carry you off to bed and make mad, passionate love to you all night. I want to prove my feelings for you. Since that's not an option, I'm going home."
"Why does it have to be all or nothing with you?" she asked.
"Why does it have to be all or nothing with you?" he asked in return.
"This is the most ridiculous conversation I've ever had, Dax. We think we're falling in love, but we can't agree on the terms of this relationship. Go home. Maybe we do need to figure it all out."
"I said I'd take things slow, and that's what I'm doing. Don't get all huffy about it, Angela. Just think about things. Think about building this relationship, not tearing it down. And talk to Annie. Ask her what's changed in their relationship since they got back together. That might make you understand what I need to tell you about myself. It also might be the deciding factor in whether or not you even want to continue with me at all."
"If it's real, we'll know, won't we, Dax? If we're apart, we'll know. Are you saying you think there might be a deal breaker?" she replied.
"Yes, baby, we'll know. Kiss me goodnight. I'll call soon. And, yes, the secret I need to tell you could either be a deal breaker or a deal maker. Talk to Annie, " he said as he leaned in for one more kiss. "If, after you talk to her, you want to talk to me, call."
After she'd walked him to the door, Angela thought about what he'd said. He wanted her to believe he was falling in love with her, that she was what he wanted. But he wasn't ready to commit to anything more than being her lover right now. Could she live with that? Could she settle for that? And what the hell was this big secret he kept talking about? It couldn't be that bad, could it? And what in heaven's name did it have to do with Annie and Dane?
I knew going into this, Dax Daring was against marriage. I have only myself to blame for letting my attraction to him turn into love.
She slowly walked to the bedroom to prepare for bed. As she climbed between the sheets, she thought about what might have happened, had she allowed Dax to stay. Am I being old-fashioned? The guy she'd been hot for since meeting him three years ago was offering her a chance, and she was turning it down, hoping for more. Most girls would have jumped at the chance to be Dax Daring's girlfriend and lover. Why am I so different, why do I think I have to have it all, all or nothing, just like he said?
Realizing they'd only bee
n officially dating for a short time, she decided she might be rushing things a bit and picked up the phone to call Annie.
"Annie, are you awake?" she asked when her best friend answered the phone.
"Yes, I am. Are you okay?"
"No, not really, it's about Dax," Angela replied.
"Why am I not surprised? What's my dear little brother-in-law done now?"
"He hasn't done anything. That's just it. He's trying to be respectful of my wishes to take it slow. But am I wrong to expect that of him?"
"Are you falling for him?"
"Too late, I've already fallen."
"Oh, Angela, you know how Dax is," Annie said with a sigh.
"He says he's falling for me, too, though, that he's never felt this way before. But the problem is he wants a relationship with no strings yet, and I want promises of forever first."
"Angela, I hate to say this, but you knew that going into this. However, I have to admit, after seeing the two of you together, he treats you differently than anyone else I've ever seen him with. Maybe he just hasn't realized yet what he really wants. In my opinion, I think it's only a matter of time before he comes around. He has already admitted he loves you. He isn't seeing anyone else that I know of. He loves being with you, in the closest thing to a relationship he's ever had. Do you really have to have the ring on your finger right now?"
"I'm going to lose him. I know it. And, no, I don't need to be married any time soon. I just need to know that's where this is going. Is that too much to ask? I'm not getting any younger, you know."
Angela heard Dane say something in the background. Annie replied, "Dane agrees with me. Dax is not the same when he's around you. I think he cares for you more than you think he does."
"I just don't know what to do. He left tonight saying we need to take a break and figure things out."
"You've only been seeing each other a few weeks, and you're already having such a serious discussion. I really think there's more going on here than just Dax wanting to get in your pants, Angela. You need to do as he said and think about this.
"You are probably right. It's just my insecurities talking. But, one other thing. He told me to ask you something about changes to your marriage since you and Dane got back together. He said there is something I need to know about him and I should talk to you about it first. He said it might be a deal-breaker for me. Do you know what he's talking about? What does your marriage have to do with Dax or with me, for that matter?"
Annie hesitated. In fact, Angela wasn't sure she was going to answer her at all. Finally, she said, "Honey, I don't want to discuss this over the phone. How about we have dinner tomorrow night, just you and me? It's a Friday night, and we can make a girls' night of it. We haven't done that in ages. We can have a nice long chat about things."
"Now, you've really got my mind whirling in a thousand different directions. Okay, I'll meet you at our old favorite restaurant at seven."
"Honey, it'll be okay. Try to get some sleep, and stop worrying so much. I just want you and Dax to be as happy as Dane and I are. I love both of you. We'll talk more tomorrow night. I promise."
"All right. I'll let you go. Have a nice night. Thanks for listening. I'll think about things," Angela promised. She could hear Dane talking in the background.
"Dane says he'll talk to Dax, too, to see where his head is," Annie said before hanging up. "You guys helped us through a bad time; it's our turn to help the two of you."
"Thanks. At least one of us is happy. I'll see you tomorrow night."
"It wasn't so long ago, that wasn't the case. Like I said, you and Dax helped us out. We'll be glad to return the favor if it means our two most favorite people can be happy, too."
"Good night. And tell Dane I said thank you."
"Good night, Angela. Get some sleep. It may all seem better in the morning. Oh, guess what? Dane's phone is ringing, and it's Dax. I'll talk to you tomorrow."
"This ought to be good. Good night."
As Angela rolled over, she wondered what Dax was saying about her to his older brother. When sleep finally overtook her, visions of the man she loved danced in her head—vivid images of Dax leaning in for a kiss, of him telling her she was the one he'd been waiting for, of him down on one knee.
And the next morning, she was really curious about what he wanted Annie to tell her about him. Why hadn't he just told her himself? What could be that shocking that he felt Annie needed to prepare her?
Chapter 10
Dax dialed his brother's number and waited. He'd driven home from Angela's, taken a cold shower and settled into bed. When Dane answered, he said, "Hey, Dane. I got back from the site a while ago. I had dinner with Angela tonight before coming home."
"Seeing a lot of her, aren't you? What gives with that, Dax?" Dane asked, playing dumb.
"I don't know, Dane. I know I gave you and Annie so much grief about rushing things, but I think I'm beginning to get it now."
"What exactly are you trying to tell me, little bro?"
"Dane, I'm in over my head here. I-I'm falling, hard and fast. The deal is, she wants promises I'm not sure I can make. I've always said I didn't want the whole exclusive thing, but, man, I can't even think about going out with anyone but Angela."
"So what exactly is the problem here, little brother? I'm not sure I understand. Seems to me like you're pretty clear about how you feel about her."
"I am clear about that. It's just that I don't know if I can give her what she wants. She wants a commitment. I think we should see how things go first. And there is that little matter of lifestyle that I haven't told her about yet. I told her to talk to Annie, and then if she still wanted to talk to me, she could call. This could be a deal-breaker, you know."
"Why the hell can't you commit, Dax? What's stopping you? When you meet the one, you should know, like I did with Annie. Maybe we're different in that respect. As for the lifestyle, she called Annie already. They are having dinner to talk tomorrow night."
"I've always said if I found someone like Annie, I might change my mind. But Angela's nothing like Annie, and I want that girl like I've never wanted anyone. Maybe I shouldn't have mentioned that there was something she needed to know about me. I may have just blown it all to smithereens. Making a commitment may not even be an option after that dinner with Annie."
"Dax, you need to think about what you want, long term. Stop second-guessing yourself. You already know what she wants. Now step back and think about where you see yourself five years from now. Do you see yourself with Angela, maybe with a baby, or at least a house, or do you see yourself still out playing around? As for the lifestyle, she needs to know. Don't keep that a secret like I did with Annie."
"She's been honest from the start with me about what she's looking for. Hell, she wasn't even going to go out with me because I'd made it so plain to her in the past that I had no intention of following in your footsteps up the aisle."
"You need to do some serious soul-searching, Dax. Don't let her get away if she's what you want. Angela's a good girl. You're entitled to change your mind, you know. Just because you've always said the married life wasn't for you, that doesn't mean you have to stand by that statement forever."
Dax chuckled. "I guess you're right. I never really thought of it that way. I've always been so adamant about my stand on that issue. I'll let you get back to my sweet sister-in-law. Thanks for the talk."
"Take care, brother."
Dax ended the call and lay in bed thinking about the conversations he'd had with both Angela and Dane that night. As exhaustion finally overtook his mind and his body, he fell into a deep slumber, one filled with dreams of Angela. Angela's laugh, her sparkling eyes lighting up at something he'd said, and how she looked after he'd kissed her, all these things were on his mind throughout the night.
The next morning when he got up, he sent a text to Angela just before leaving for his office, telling her not to give up on them. When he didn't receive an immediate reply, he left the a
partment, silently cursing himself for possibly alienating her forever.
At lunchtime, he finally heard from her. She apologized for not answering sooner and told him she would never give up on them.
He forced himself to stick to his guns about taking a break to sort things out, though. He didn't reply, nor did he call her when his workday was through. It was Friday night, and he sorely wanted to spend it with her, but, knowing how the evening would end, he rented some movies, picked up a pizza and went home alone. He thought all evening about how the dinner with Annie and Angela was going.
On Saturday, he went fishing and later to his parents' house. His mother fried the fish he'd caught, and they had dinner together. When Brenna asked where Angela was, Dax said simply, "We're taking a break this weekend."
Brenna's eyebrows shot up as she replied, "Is there a problem?"
"Nothing you'd understand, Mom. Just let it go at that."
"If you say so, Dax, but let me say just one thing. That girl is the best thing ever to come into your life. If you let her get away, you'll regret it until the day you die."
"It's complicated, Mom. We're working on it."
"And I'll bet I know what the complication is. You're having trouble making a commitment, aren't you? You've never been one to settle down with just one girl. I had so hoped Angela would be the one. She's so perfect for you."
"Why do you say that?"
"I know you, Dax. And you're right in being cautious. But I like Angela, and I think you do too. From what I've seen, the two of you get along really well, and she just fits right in with the family. Now, I'm not going to say anything else. You have to make up your own mind."
Dax's dad spoke up. "Brenna, back off for now. Give the boy some breathing room. We all like Angela, but ultimately, it's their lives and their future. Dax, think long and hard before you make any decisions. If Angela's the one for you, you'll make the right choice."
"Thanks, both of you, really. Angela and I both have a lot to think about."
The subject was dropped, and soon after dinner, Dax drove back to his empty apartment. He wanted to call Angela, but he stopped himself several times. He went to bed early, an unusual thing for him to do on a Saturday night, and was asleep when a call came in and woke him. It was Gerald, his boss.
The Daring Doms Page 12